Screen Junkies » Jaws http://www.screenjunkies.com Movie Reviews & TV Show Reviews Wed, 20 Aug 2014 20:40:54 +0000 en hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.3.1 Now Bryan Cranston Is Mad At Jaws In ‘JawZilla’ Trailer Mashup http://www.screenjunkies.com/video/now-bryan-cranston-is-made-at-jaws-in-jawzilla-trailer-mashup/ http://www.screenjunkies.com/video/now-bryan-cranston-is-made-at-jaws-in-jawzilla-trailer-mashup/#comments Tue, 06 May 2014 20:57:33 +0000 Wookie Johnson http://www.screenjunkies.com/?post_type=video&p=261491 JawZilla would also be a great rap name.

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Cute idea but I’d like to extend a word of caution. As great as Bryan Cranston is, now I’m worried this will plant the seed at some studio that a Jaws reboot is a good idea.

By the way, JawZilla would be a great rap name.

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The 7 Greatest Action Movie Enforcers http://www.screenjunkies.com/movies/movie-lists/the-7-greatest-action-movie-enforcers-2/ http://www.screenjunkies.com/movies/movie-lists/the-7-greatest-action-movie-enforcers-2/#comments Mon, 29 Jul 2013 21:30:55 +0000 Lee Keeler http://www.screenjunkies.com/?p=256150 In honor of Elysium...

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Every great action story needs a villain, and every great action villain needs an enforcer. Going all the way back to the days of Beelzebub getting his hands dirty for the big man downstairs, right-hand men have been key to setting tremendous conflict into motion. Be it in District 9 or your classic Bond flick, these goons wreak varying degrees of havoc with motivations that range from personal vendettas to on-the-clock hooliganism.

In Neill Blomkamp’s forthcoming action-thriller Elysium, Matt Damon’s character Max will square off against one of the most cunning baddies to ever sleaze up the screen. So to commemorate the release of Columbia TriStar’s sci-fi/action smash-up Elysium, opening in theaters on August 9th, we’re stoked to present you with the seven greatest action movie enforcers.

Kruger, Elysium

What would happen if you had to deputize Patrick Bateman from American Psycho to get the job done? That is essentially the quandary posed and answered in Elysium when Jodie Foster’s Secretary Delacourt must let Kruger out of his cage. As the most sadistic post-apocalyptic baddie this side of The Road Warrior, Sharlto Copley goes against type in this role, delivering a sinewy psycho whose sense of duty is outweighed by an oddly playful bloodlust. Despite the high-tech noodlery of the year 2154, Kruger proves that sometimes a nice, rusty machete is all a fella needs to take the edge off of a bad day at work.

Jaws, Various James Bond Movies

You gotta be doing some serious henchman-ing to be considered the most ridiculous Bond villain. It just wasn’t enough to just have the durability to survive falling out of a plane, driving off of a cliff and fighting off a shark based on brute strength alone; this guy needed to have a grill that would make Lil’ Wayne blush on top of it! Pointlessly chewing his way out of situations and into our hearts, even Jaws could not survive Moonraker, which to this day serves as the apex of Bond franchise goofdickery next to that one with the voodoo and the chubby sheriff. It’s amazing, given the array of Bond villains spoofed in the Austin Powers franchise, that Jaws never quite made the cut.

Luca Brasi, The Godfather

That whole horse-head-in-a-bed thing? Luca’s handiwork. He may have been a towering, stuttering creep, but as Vito Corleone’s undercover muscle, Brasi was a terrific iceman because he didn’t require a crew to make a hit. Sadly, that whole lone wolf thing was precisely what lead to his downfall when three goons from the Sollozzo family saw to it that Luca slept with the fishes. Fun fact: On the low-key hired-killer tip, if you apply the lyrics of the Suzanne Vega song to this character, it kind of lines up: he doesn’t want you asking about some kind of trouble, some kind of fight. Just don’t ask him what it was.

Odd Job, Goldfinger

Caddy. Cheaffeur. Assassin. Odd Job wore many hats, but the most useful of them all would have to be the one with the razor-brim on it. When he wasn’t busy decapitating statues in Goldfinger’s front yard, the dapper merc could be found enjoying his favorite hobbies: tenaciously following 007 around, accepting pain from 007 with menacing smirks and tending to his derby cap with shocking aplomb. They just don’t make goons like this anymore; the guy helped his boss kill a woman by painting her to death. Sigh.

Karl, Die Hard

Karl, like most Germans, ist a herr who knows precisely what he wants. For example, in the great takeover of Nakatomi Plaza, after his brother Tony (?) has been brutally pwned by John McClane, Karl informs his compatriots “AAAAAARGH! I want blood!” While Karl, like most Germans, would likely have been extremely efficient at his job, he became that much more deft with a Steyr AUG rifle with the added incentive of avenging said mangled brother. But Karl, unlike most Germans, had a mullet so strong that it could resist getting lynched by industrial chains, only to have it blown clean off by Carl Winslow. Never work with family.

Colonel Kobus Venter, District 9

The bulldog of Multi-National United, Kobus tromps through the ghettos of District 9, gleefully keeping the weak and disadvantaged underfoot while on the clock. His villainy reaches near-comical heights, akin to the treacherous cheese of an 80’s WWF antagonist, making him a perfect foil to the ebullient Wikus Van De Merwe. Despite keeping his cool in the line of duty, Koobus’ urge to bully Wikus is exactly what makes him lose his head.

Kobayashi, The Usual Suspects

Unlike many of the brutal hatchet men on this list, Kobayashi is adept at the hands-off approach in carrying out the misdoings of his benefactor, the notorious Keyser Söze. An evil precursor to the sharp-tongued Dr. King Schultz of Django Unchained, Kobayashi delivers unflinching speeches that intimidate hardasses into backing down and scratching their heads. Just try to pin down that accent: is he Pakistani? Japanese? Irish? As the man himself said, “one cannot be betrayed if one has no people.”

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http://www.screenjunkies.com/movies/movie-lists/the-7-greatest-action-movie-enforcers-2/feed/ 0 Kruger Elysium Jaws bits a cable Luca Brasi Odd Job Karl Die Hard Kobus District 9 Kobayashi
Links Away: Jaws Is A Maneater http://www.screenjunkies.com/video/links-away-jaws-is-a-maneater/ http://www.screenjunkies.com/video/links-away-jaws-is-a-maneater/#comments Thu, 26 May 2011 01:02:36 +0000 Reza F. http://www.screenjunkies.com/?post_type=Video&p=213642 Bloody shark attacks seem so much less disturbing when set to upbeat music.

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A clever mashup of the film Jaws and the Hall and Oats classic “Maneater.” Bloody shark attacks seem so much less disturbing when set to upbeat music.

Screw beaches. We’ve got links:

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Alexis Bledel Hotness (TuVez)

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3-D ‘Jaws’ Remake May Be in the Works at Universal http://www.screenjunkies.com/movies/movie-news/3-d-jaws-remake-may-be-in-the-works-at-universal/ http://www.screenjunkies.com/movies/movie-news/3-d-jaws-remake-may-be-in-the-works-at-universal/#comments Wed, 30 Nov -0001 00:00:00 +0000 Has our insatiable appetite for stereoscopic film imagery driven us past the point of no return? Would Hollywood be brazen enough to dig up the corpse of a classic in order to drop a 3-D deuce in its mouth? I'd like to think there's a certain line that does not get crossed but this item has me worried.A source at Universal has told Cinema Blend that a 3-D remake of Jaws may be in the works. From Cinema Blend:Their claim is that people now expect more, visually, from their movie going experience. So, Hollywood studios are inclined to take some of their tried and true franchise names like Jaws and bring them into the 3D world. The tipster also revealed that at one point Tracy Morgan was being considered for the role of Matt Hooper, originally played by Richard Dreyfuss. Willikers. This is too absurd to be true. It's like a movie poster 30 Rock's Tracy Jordan would hang in his dressing room. I don't know what to fear more with Tracy Morgan in the water, the shark or somebody getting pregnant.Regard this as a rumor for now. Universal will come to their senses. The last thing Jaws needs is a remake, especially one that heads in a comedic direction. That's why we have One Crazy Summer. (Cinema Blend)

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Has our insatiable appetite for stereoscopic film imagery driven us past the point of no return? Would Hollywood be brazen enough to dig up the corpse of a classic in order to drop a 3-D deuce in its mouth? I’d like to think there’s a certain line that does not get crossed but this item has me worried.

A source at Universal has told Cinema Blend that a 3-D remake of Jaws may be in the works. From Cinema Blend:

Their claim is that people now expect more, visually, from their movie

going experience. So, Hollywood studios are inclined to take some of their tried and true franchise names like Jaws and bring them into the 3D world.

The tipster also revealed that at one point Tracy Morgan was being considered for the role of Matt Hooper, originally played by Richard Dreyfuss. Willikers. This is too absurd to be true. It’s like a movie poster 30 Rock‘s Tracy Jordan would hang in his dressing room. I don’t know what to fear more with Tracy Morgan in the water, the shark or somebody getting pregnant.

Regard this as a rumor for now. Universal will come to their senses. The last thing Jaws needs is a remake, especially one that heads in a comedic direction. That’s why we have One Crazy Summer. (Cinema Blend)

 

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