For years, I’ve been writing the major studios and begging them to make a film about American servicemen engaging in hardcore gay sex and taking part in a plot to kill George W. Bush. And for years, the Secret Service has been asking me to stop. And stop I will, now that my requests have finally been answered by none-other than the Wachowski Brothers (or whatever you call them now) and their new film, Cobalt Neural 9.

The story starts off as, yes, a hardcore romance between the American soldier and the Iraqi soldier during the second Gulf War– they are depicted "rutting like animals behind this fence" while wearing burqas– but when disaster strikes, the two plot to kill the man responsible for the war: George W. Bush.

Wow, I’m not sure that will play in Peoria. But then again, I could be wrong. After all, two dudes wearing burqas and "rutting like animals" still sounds less gay than Wachowski’s live action version of Speed Racer. (Cinema Blend)