^{Just saying.}

Adventureland director and Turtle Club member Greg Mottola has been hired to write (and presumably direct) Paramount’s adaptation of the overly-titled Important Artifacts and Personal Property From the Collection of Lenore Doolan and Harold Morris, Including Books, Street Fashion and Jewelry.

Mottola will turn the fictional estate auction catalogue from a dissolved relationship into a romantic comedy that has Brad Pitt and Natalie Portman attached to star. Jennifer Aniston is said to be working on a similar project, starring herself and a life-sized Brad Pitt Hairdoll. (THR)