Screen Junkies » howard stern http://www.screenjunkies.com Movie Reviews & TV Show Reviews Fri, 22 Aug 2014 19:40:21 +0000 en hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.3.1 E!’s ‘Chelsea Lately’ To End In August, Leaving Chelsea Handler A Free Agent http://www.screenjunkies.com/tv/tv-news/es-chelsea-lately-to-end-in-august-leaving-chelsea-handler-a-free-agent/ http://www.screenjunkies.com/tv/tv-news/es-chelsea-lately-to-end-in-august-leaving-chelsea-handler-a-free-agent/#comments Wed, 28 May 2014 22:43:55 +0000 Penn Collins http://www.screenjunkies.com/?p=261855 Chelsea currently has no plans beyond then.

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After seven years of being an unlikeable talk-show host, Chelsea Handler will be exiting E! n August, a few months before her contract ends. Why the sudden hurry? Well, Chelsea Lately has been falling off pretty rapidly in the ratings department, having fallen off about 33% from where she was in 2010, way back when people hadn’t gotten sick of her.

Alas, here we are. Chelsea Handler is a somewhat bankable property, but probably not as a late-night flagship for a large cable network, and almost certainly not for a broadcast network. She rubs people, including, for the sake of full disclosure, this writer, the wrong way, and talked tons of shit about her current network, E!, to the point that it likely serves as a giant red flag for any prospective networks.

Also, she was involved in a romantic relationship with 50 Cent. That warrants mentioning for some reason.

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NBC Getting On Board With Turning Its Late-Night Lineup Into An Absolute Greco-Roman Clusterf*ck http://www.screenjunkies.com/tv/tv-news/nbc-getting-on-board-with-turning-its-late-night-lineup-into-an-absolute-greco-roman-clusterfck/ http://www.screenjunkies.com/tv/tv-news/nbc-getting-on-board-with-turning-its-late-night-lineup-into-an-absolute-greco-roman-clusterfck/#comments Wed, 06 Mar 2013 20:52:13 +0000 Penn Collins http://www.screenjunkies.com/?p=253870 Maybe they could move them all to an island with no electricity and replace the shows with 'Seinfeld' reruns.

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It’s been a nearly universal opinion that since the Tonight Show debacle with Conan O’Brien, the underlying problem with NBC’s late night schedule is that they simply haven’t tinkered with it enough. Well, always ones to nip perceived problems in the bud, NBC has gotten out their Bob the Builder hats and coveralls and is contemplating a massive overhaul that would put Jimmy Fallon in the Tonight Show spot, have Howard Stern move into the Late Night spot vacated spot, thus freeing up Leno to either take over Stern’s duties hosting a morning radio show, judging a singing contest, or possibly just allowing Leno the eventual freedom to throw his arms up in exasperation and allowing himself to be crushed into a cube, perhaps, after filtration, providing a few pints of clean drinking water for underprivileged Ecuadoran families.

Only time will tell.

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Howard Stern Calls Jay Leno A ‘Spineless Maggot’, Upsets Fragile NBC http://www.screenjunkies.com/tv/tv-news/howard-stern-calls-jay-leno-a-spineless-maggot-upsets-fragile-nbc/ http://www.screenjunkies.com/tv/tv-news/howard-stern-calls-jay-leno-a-spineless-maggot-upsets-fragile-nbc/#comments Mon, 27 Aug 2012 20:51:11 +0000 Penn Collins http://www.screenjunkies.com/?p=250566 I never knew him to be one to speak his mind at the expense of decorum. How odd.

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In a move that must have come as a total shock to the suits at NBC, America’s Got Talent‘s Howard Stern has spoken his mind and called fellow NBC-ian Jay Leno a “spineless maggot,” which is hilarious because it’s just so apt.

Here’s what the King of All Media had to say about the matter:

“I got a threatening kind of comment from one of the executives,” Stern told listeners on Tuesday, Aug. 21. “I was laughing my ass off. I said, ‘Do not tell me to not talk about Jay Leno. I will f—ing talk about Jay Leno for four hours if you tell me not to. I was done with Jay, now I’m all fired up again. F— Jay!”

Yes, yes. Fuck Jay.

It’s beginning to become clear that Anthony Bourdain and Howard Stern are kindred spirits when it comes to biting the hand that feeds them. Also, they kind of look alike. If Howard Stern starts railing on Emeril, though, I’m going to need to see both of them in the same room for confirmation they’re different people.

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Howard Stern, David Letterman Bash Jay Leno Yet Again (It Never Gets Old) http://www.screenjunkies.com/video/howard-stern-david-letterman-bash-jay-leno-yet-again-it-never-gets-old/ http://www.screenjunkies.com/video/howard-stern-david-letterman-bash-jay-leno-yet-again-it-never-gets-old/#comments Thu, 02 Feb 2012 17:21:14 +0000 Wookie Johnson http://www.screenjunkies.com/?post_type=video&p=244354 In other news, the sun came up in the east.

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Howard Stern went on Late Night with David Letterman last night and did what he does best. No. He didn’t force Paul Schaffer to fart the melody of an LMFAO song. Instead, he stirred up the age old battle between Letterman and Jay Leno.

Stern told Letterman that NBC brass have tried to force the new America’s Got Talent judge to promote the program on The Tonight Show, but Stern refused, saying, “I’m a Letterman guy.” He then revealed that he didn’t realize the Late Night Wars had ended with Dave calling off any future salvos. Except, of course, for Letterman commenting that if he found out Leno had won a People’s Choice award, it would be “like hearing Manson has been paroled.”

So, war back on? (USA Today)

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‘America’s Got Talent’ Got Howard Stern http://www.screenjunkies.com/tv/tv-news/americas-got-talent-got-howard-stern/ http://www.screenjunkies.com/tv/tv-news/americas-got-talent-got-howard-stern/#comments Thu, 15 Dec 2011 17:33:35 +0000 Wookie Johnson http://www.screenjunkies.com/?p=239852 The show could get an in flux of dwarf tossing.

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Piers Morgan has gotta go!! The CNN personality has left NBC‘s America’s Got Talent with Howard Stern officially stepping in to fill his empty chair. Fartman will join current judges Sharon Osbourne and Howie Mandel in determining whether or not people who shoot themselves from cannons at large gongs have talent.

Listeners of Stern’s radio show will know that he has a great repoire with Sharon Osbourne, so this could be a very good move. He has a way of pulling things out of people and bringing conversation to a frank level. If we’re ever to find out what Ozzy’s balls look like, he’s the guy who will get us there. I’ll check out an episode or two before I get bored and go find beer. (NY Times)

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9 Celebrities Besides Howard Stern Perfect For ‘America’s Got Talent’ http://www.screenjunkies.com/tv/tv-lists/9-celebrities-besides-howard-stern-perfect-for-americas-got-talent/ http://www.screenjunkies.com/tv/tv-lists/9-celebrities-besides-howard-stern-perfect-for-americas-got-talent/#comments Mon, 14 Nov 2011 19:18:09 +0000 Wookie Johnson http://www.screenjunkies.com/?p=236238 We salute America's tastemakers... and Gary Busey.

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Is America ready to judge the talent of professional farters? We shall see. Producers of America’s Got Talent are currently negotiating a deal with Howard Stern to bring him in as a new celebrity judge. Seems like a pretty bold move for the series. It’s been on the air for like five seasons. Why choose to make it awesome now?

It’s true that no agreement has been made yet, so this could just as easily not work out. Stern would be an excellent addition to the show and a good reason to tune-in. Should things not work out, however, the producers have a lot of options. They should at least consider these nine people as back-ups.

Norm MacDonald

With his schedule freed up by the cancellation of Sports Show with Norm MacDonald, the delightfully looney comic has nothing but time to reinvigorate America’s Got Talent. He’s proven that he’s not shy to proclaim when somebody sucks. Just ask Carrot Top, O.J., and David Hasselhoff.

Sean Penn

There is not an actor alive that values the craft more than Sean Penn. He’s fiercely protective of his fellow make-pretenders and never unwilling to share his opinions. His judgements would carry a weight that Sharon Osbourne’s never could. Plus, it would be funny to watch him have to evaluate a guy who plays tuba while balancing on a unicycle.

Kris Jenner

Kris Jenner has been working for years to establish herself as a top-notch talent manager. Why not go to the source? She’s likely seen hundreds of artists striving to make it big. That kind of experience will come in handy on this show. However, I doubt the censors will allow contestants to film themselves rubbing their genitals against Ray J’s. It, technically, doesn’t count as a talent.

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Stern Calls Leno “Horrible” On ‘Letterman’, Leno Cries Himself To Sleep http://www.screenjunkies.com/video/stern-calls-leno-horrible-on-letterman-leno-cries-himself-to-sleep/ http://www.screenjunkies.com/video/stern-calls-leno-horrible-on-letterman-leno-cries-himself-to-sleep/#comments Sat, 05 Feb 2011 02:41:48 +0000 Geoffrey Golden http://www.screenjunkies.com/?post_type=Video&p=25078 Stern also thinks that during last year's Superbowl commercial, Letterman should have "finish[ed] him off" when he had the chance. I'd watch that this year.

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Conan O’Brien has a new show. Jay Leno got his old job back, albeit in the most snakish way imaginable. David Letterman has probably dropped something crazy off a rooftop recently. Yes, more than a year later, everybody’s moved on from the late night wars, except for shock jock Howard Stern. Of course, Stern was never a part of the wars to begin with, but like the kid who tells his friend to fight a bully because his DS broke and he’s bored, Stern was on “Letterman” recently, goading him to retake the late night ratings crown from Mister Evilchin.

In the clip above, Stern says Leno is “horrible” and “talentless,” and Letterman only laughed in response. We used Google Translator to convert Nervous Laughter into English, and Letterman’s response was, “duh, but I’m gonna keep my mouth shut, cause I don’t want to get uncomfortable looks from Rickey Minor at parties.”

Stern also thinks that during last year’s Superbowl commercial, Letterman should have “finish[ed] him off” when he had the chance. I’d watch that this year. Of course, we’ve already seen the results of a full on Leno / Letterman battle, and it ain’t pretty for either host. (CBS News)

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Lisa Lampanelli Ready To Get Racist In New David Chase Movie http://www.screenjunkies.com/movies/movie-news/lisa-lampanelli-ready-to-get-racist-in-new-david-chase-movie/ http://www.screenjunkies.com/movies/movie-news/lisa-lampanelli-ready-to-get-racist-in-new-david-chase-movie/#comments Wed, 02 Feb 2011 01:58:42 +0000 Geoffrey Golden http://www.screenjunkies.com/?p=23956 She'll play a mother opposite James Gandolfini. It's a match made in Heaven, and by "Heaven," I mean the Tri-State area.

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Soprano‘s mastermind David Chase is making a movie that’s reportedly quasi-biographical. His “dad” will be played by James Gandolfini, so you need a mother who can really stand-up to Tony Soprano’s super macho, loud-mouthed, duck-feeding bullshit. Also, the movie takes place in the 1960s, when everybody’s racist, so this actress should also be racist. We fired up our own Cast-o-Matic 9000 and came up with the same result that Chase’s did: comedian Lisa Lampanelli.

Lampanelli recently revealed on The Howard Stern Show that she was cast as the David Chase character’s mom, perhaps somewhere between a joke about black people loving food stamps and her explanation for why it’s okay for her to make jokes about black people loving food stamps. Rumored to be called The Twylight Zones, we hear that it’s about guys who form a rock band in the 60s, and discover the 60s music revolution. It’s a story that’s never been told before. Oh wait, the exact opposite of that last sentence is true.

Still, if it’s “The Sopranos” meets Almost Famous, I’m there. And I’d better be there, if I don’t want a visit from any “waste management consultants.” (/Film)

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Howard Stern Slams Jay Leno, Makes Us Nostalgic For January 2010 http://www.screenjunkies.com/tv/tv-news/howard-stern-slams-jay-leno-apparently-not-the-first-to-do-so/ http://www.screenjunkies.com/tv/tv-news/howard-stern-slams-jay-leno-apparently-not-the-first-to-do-so/#comments Tue, 18 Jan 2011 07:11:44 +0000 Geoffrey Golden http://www.screenjunkies.com/?p=17511 Conan O'Brien has made some kind of angry peace with Jay Leno, but Howard Stern recently Jaywalked all up in the Tonight Show host's freakish chin.

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One year later, Conan O’Brien has made some kind of angry peace with Jay Leno, but Howard Stern recently Jaywalked all up in the Tonight Show host’s freakish chin. The skeezy shock jock pulled no punches on an upcoming interview for CNN‘s Piers Morgan Tonight, calling Leno “insane,” which definitely means something from a man who once dressed up in ass-less spandex in front of millions and called himself “Fartman.” He also says Leno is “a crook,” which would mean Leno is incapable of coming up with his own consistently mediocre-to-terrible material.

Stern also took a big dump on Leno’s audience too:

“He’s not fit to scrub David Letterman‘s feet,” he goes on. “I don’t know how he’s beaten David Letterman in the ratings. It’s beyond my comprehension. America must be filled with morons who at night lay in bed — the ones who are watching him, they must be in a coma.”

When the Conan controversy erupted, I really hated Leno. Now that it’s all died down, I don’t know… it’s not that I think he’s even remotely amusing. It’s just that he’s so milquetoast, it’s hard for me to feel anything about him. I have no strong like or dislike of Wonder Bread, Matthew Sweet or the Toyota Camry either – they just kind of are. However, if Stern wants to spend the energy to hate him, I wish “The King of All Media That’s Satellite Radio” lots of luck. (Hollywood Reporter)

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Artie Lange Stabbed Himself NINE Times http://www.screenjunkies.com/tv/tv-news/artie-lange-stabbed-himself-nine-times/ http://www.screenjunkies.com/tv/tv-news/artie-lange-stabbed-himself-nine-times/#comments Wed, 30 Nov -0001 00:00:00 +0000 Howard Stern sidekick and actor Artie Lange was admitted to the hospital this past weekend for undisclosed reasons and now the cause has come to light. According to the NY Post, Lange attempted to take his own life by STABBING HIMSELF NINE TIMES. That's so metal! It's 9 times more metal than Juliet Capulet's suicide and 4.5 times more so than Elliott Smith's. The bloodied funnyman was discovered by his mother who called 911. Surgeons were able to save him despite a massive loss of blood. Stern commented on-air, "We all have our demons. Artie has given this show tremendous moments of great comedy. He's a tremendous contributor. He is a good man. Don't forget how great he is."Factoring together his eating, drinking, drugging, and stabbing-himself-nine-times habits, the man is obviously invincible. Perhaps he's the protector this world needs. If only he would stop copying Chris Farley. (NY Post)

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Howard Stern sidekick and actor Artie Lange was admitted to the hospital this past weekend for undisclosed reasons and now the cause has come to light. According to the NY Post, Lange attempted to take his own life by STABBING HIMSELF NINE TIMES. That’s so metal! It’s 9 times more metal than Juliet Capulet’s suicide and 4.5 times more so than Elliott Smith’s. The bloodied funnyman was discovered by his mother who called 911. Surgeons were able to save him despite a massive loss of blood. Stern commented on-air, "We all have our demons. Artie has given this show tremendous moments of great comedy. He’s a tremendous contributor. He is a good man. Don’t forget how great he is."

Factoring together his eating, drinking, drugging, and stabbing-himself-nine-times habits, the man is obviously invincible. Perhaps he’s the protector this world needs. If only he would stop copying Chris Farley. (NY Post)

 

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