Though it probably has little to do with the shutdown, an announcement was made earlier this week that Brad Pitt‘s World War Z was going head to head with the Disney project, also picking a release date of December 21, 2012.

The project, though initially met with eye-rolling over another adaptation, seemed to be pulling in some quality actors in the way of Dwight Yoakam, Helena Bonham-Carter, and Barry Pepper. Shifting popular sentiment to “cautiously optimistic,” which on the internet, is equivalent to walking on water.

While the budget trimming makes sound financial sense, I can’t imagine a world in which a Johnny Depp Disney film fails to be profitable. Maybe they just don’t trust that Armie Hamer kid. Did you know there weren’t even two of him in The Social Network? He deceived us.

Dale would play the Lone Ranger‘s older brother, Dan Reid and leader of the Texas Rangers, while Pepper would play Captain J. Fuller, the leader of the 7th Cavalry, because the law requires Pepper to play an Army guy whenever the opportunity is there.

In a refreshing change, Helena Bonham Carter, who is not as far along in talks as the other entrants, would play the proprietor of a local brothel, or “female pimp” as I would like to regard her. Variety describes her character as “colorful,” because pimps are colorful.

These all sound like pretty solid additions to for film that has been criticized by many (myself included) as a gratuitous remake from the Disney machine. What can I say? Dwight Yoakam knows how to bring the gravitas.

Disney will release The Lone Ranger on December 21, 2012. Now you know what to see on Christmas day before you gorge on Chinese food. Hi ho, Silver! and all that jazz. The film, directed by Gore Verbinski, stars Armie Hammer as the titular Lone Ranger and Johnny Depp as his trusty sidekick, Tonto. I’m personally excited to see what new funny voice Depp will come up with this time. Or his take on the cliché Native American speech pattern.

Ang Lee‘s Life of Pi and Judd Apatow’s next film also release on December 21, 2012. That is until they realize they’re opening against a Johnny Depp film.

Hammer will ride for director Gore Verbinski and producer Jerry Bruckheimer in Disney’s big screen revival of the classic Western series. He’s also got a supporting role in the upcoming J. Edgar Hoover biopic and he’ll play the prince in Th Brothers Grimm: Snow White, just one in an infinite number of Snow White projects in the works. However, this looking-to-start-a-franchise movie could be the spurs to the sides of the horse that is Hammer’s career. The horse is named “Ol’ Careery.”

No official release date yet for Disney’s Lone Ranger, but it could ride into theaters as early as fall 2012. (Variety)

It chronicles art therapist Zach Taylor’s investigation into the life and madness of Martin Grace, an accused serial killer who claims to have foreseen, but not caused, his victims’ deaths.

Sounds interesting. It’ll be strange and exciting to see how a large scale, blockbuster filmmaker like Verbinski will be able to translate his huge ideas to not only the small screen, but a small network like Starz, who have notoriously tiny budgets for their original content. Fingers crossed for skeleton masks and ketchup for fake blood! (Deadline)

Rango is so weird I can’t believe they got to make this movie. It’s a good kind of weird but I don’t know if it’s fun. It’s certainly difficult to make any sense of it, but you’ve got to appreciate that a crazy movie like this exists.

Rango (Johnny Depp) acts out scenes in his little aquarium, which is already weird because he seems to hear voices. He gets bounced out of a moving car into the desert, where armadillo roadkill and a cowgirl named Bean (Isla Fisher) lead him to a western frontier town inhabited by reptiles and rodents.

It feels like the film is finding its story as it goes along. Rango takes a long way of getting to this town. He ends up playing the role of the sheriff. Pretending to be tough actually makes him an authority. It gets around to addressing a water shortage, but no ideas for solving it. Even in the process of seeking a source of more water, Rango still takes time out to interact with a random drunken rooster or bank robbing moles.

It may be all some new wave way to deconstruct all animated quest movies and hero stories in general, let alone the western. We always get the outcast who finds a surrogate family and redeems himself. That sort of happens here, but more often the mob of talking animals just tries to out-weird each other. I think the rodent that shares he once found a human spine in his fecal matter wins. Or the bird with the arrow through his eye FOR THE ENTIRE MOVIE.I don’t remember another animated movie that incorporated hardcore gunplay. It’s like how Legend of the Guardians did 300 battles with owls, Rango really does Clint Eastwood with animals. Rango’s “Spirit of the West” vision even calls out The Man With No Name. Letting little Priscilla (Abigail Breslin) point a gun at herself is really irresponsible, in the weirdest, greatest way. I mean, a cartoon for kids pushes those boundaries and doesn’t care!

I might enjoy Rango more with the sound off, just watching the visual construction of cartoon antics like Rango’s vending machine hideout. Or the cave system that seems to cross The Goonies with Pirates of the Caribbean with a giant eye staring on the wall. It’s just so. Damn. Weird.

Rango, the Johnny Depp 3D animated western that’s looking sharp (shootin’) in previews, has made an enemy out of Smoke Free Movies. They want to have a shoot-out with the family film because minor characters are shown smoking. First you can’t smoke in restaurants, now you can’t smoke in fictional universes where animals talk? What gives?

Smoke Free Movies took out an ad in Hollywood Reporter reading:

“How many studio execs did it take to OK smoking in a ‘PG‘ movie?” the ad’s headline screams, before asking, “What was Paramount thinking?”

Maybe they were thinking that characters smoke all the time in classic westerns, so they worried about releasing an authentic, badass western, instead of a western where everybody smokes candy cigarettes or some lame cop-out like that.

“Does’Rango‘ show much smoking? Few PG films do. So why include it at all? It’s a bad guy who smokes? No excuse, either. The research finds that bad guys can have more influence than good guys on kids’ starting to smoke.”

Look, I’m not a smoker, and I don’t like it when people blow smoke in my face. But I also don’t like it when people blow smoke up my ass either, which is what this all sounds like. When I was growing up, cartoon characters were constantly telling me to go to the local library for more information on things, and I won’t be caught dead in a library to this very day. *Research Eliminated*

Also, if anything, I want to see more cartoon characters smoke, like in that old “Flintstones” commercial where Fred and Barney light up. Ahhh… that cool, ink & painty flavor. (TheWrap)

Director: Gore Verbinski

Cast: Johnny Depp, Isla Fisher, Abigail Breslin, Alfred Molina

Synopsis: The story of a chameleon with an identity crisis.

*For a cleared space on my Netflix queue 11 months from now. (Collider)

Batman has Robin. Siegfried has Roy. And the Lone Ranger has Tonto. So with Johnny Depp already cast as Tonto in Gore Verbinksi’s Lone Ranger, who does the actor feel would best complete the pair?

“There’s so many interesting possibilities out there. Brad [Pitt] would be great. [George] Clooney would be great. Don’t know who it’s going to be just yet.”

While they’re both talented, they’re also the two most popular actors in the world, so I’m not sure why Depp thinks they are “interesting possibilities.” Crispin Glover is an interesting possibility. Kenny Baker is an interesting possibility. Clooney and Pitt are pod people. (Collider)

Check out this new poster for Apollo 18. Apparently, there’s a reason we’ve never gone back to the moon, and it has nothing to do with the fact that we’re about 14 trillion in debt.

Using the fake documentary/”found footage” technique employed by Blair Witch and Cloverfield, the film chronicles the mission on Apollo 18, a moon landing that conspiracy theorists believe secretly went ahead despite a Presidential order to stand down. Once on the moon, the crew supposedly encountered something besides rocks and craters.

In case you’re too stupid to figure it out just by looking at the poster, they found aliens. And apparently, these aliens can develop technology that travels to our moon, but they can’t develop sensible footwear. (/Film)

Director Gore Verbinski and writer Terry Rossio are turning the crime procedurial on its ass. They’re putting a supernatural twist on the cop/legal drama, setting up “Magical Law” at Fox. The show takes place in “a world where the existence of supernatural beings is commonplace and follows the specialized cops and lawyers who face the unique challenges of prosecuting otherworldly crimes.” Verbinski could possibly direct if Fox decides to produce the pilot.

The title “Magical Law” makes me think more of wizards than ghosts, not that that would be any less ridiculous. Would people really watch a show with such a far out premise? And what could the consequences even be if, let’s say, an expatriate ghost is accused of the high crime of ghost treason? The death penalty? Hellooooo, they’re already dead! I’m sure they’ll come up with a Ghostbusters/Men in Black spirit holding chamber or whatever, but those movies were comedies. I doubt I’ll give two craps if a car thief specter gets off on an ectoplasm technicality. (Deadline)

Gore Verbinski has his sights on Tim Burton’s Guinness World Record. The director has teamed with Johnny Depp on three Pirates Of The Caribbean films as well as the animated Rango. Now, there are rumors that they’ll work together again with Verbinski helming Depp’s upcoming The Lone Ranger.

Nothing official has been announced, but it’s believed this news leaked in advance of Disney’s big press event later this week. If true, this is sure to upset the execs over at the Mouse House. They rented all those chairs and everything. Just great. (Deadline)

I recently posted a faaaaar out teaser for Rango which turned out to be a teaser for the website. Now Paramount has released the official trailer. The film stars Johnny Depp as a Hunter S. Thompson look-a-like chameleon with an identity crisis. The trailer has me just as baffled as the Inception trailer. Screenwriter John Logan might have been tripping off computer duster whippets while pounding away at this adventure. Ideas don’t just come out on their own, right John? **Whoosh of air**

Rango is directed by Gore Verbinski, who did the awesome Mousehunt, as well as those Caribbean Pirates movies. Befriending and/or beguiling Depp in the film are Isla Fisher, Alfred Molina, Timothy Olyphant, and Bill Nighy.

Rango scampers into theaters March 18, 2011.

Check out the trailer after the jump…

Rango — New Trailer – Watch more Movie Trailers

Yeah, uhhhhhh, here’s the teaser trailer for Rango? Directed by Gore Verbinski (Pirates of the Caribbean, The Ring), it’s tells the story of a chameleon with an identity crisis. I guess he’s a fish in this teaser that does more confusing than teasing. However, the best women of the night have both down to such an art that a John usually can’t tell the difference. So maybe this teaser is just like a skilled prostitute. Or Hunter S. Thompson’s wet dream.

The film stars the voice talents of Johnny Depp, Isla Fisher, Abigail Breslin, Bill Nighy, Stephen Root, Ray Winstone, Beth Grant, Ned Beatty, Harry Dean Stanton, and Alfred Molina. But you won’t hear any of them in the teaser. That’s the tease. Are you titillated?

Check out the teaser for Rango after the jump.

Rango — Trailer – Watch more Movie Trailers