Screen Junkies » Food http://www.screenjunkies.com Movie Reviews & TV Show Reviews Thu, 18 Sep 2014 20:13:15 +0000 en hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.3.1 ‘Bon Appétit’ Made An Inventory Of All The Food Chunk Eats Or Talks About In ‘The Goonies’ http://www.screenjunkies.com/video/heres-an-inventory-of-all-the-food-chunk-eats-or-talks-about-in-the-goonies/ http://www.screenjunkies.com/video/heres-an-inventory-of-all-the-food-chunk-eats-or-talks-about-in-the-goonies/#comments Mon, 14 Apr 2014 15:49:55 +0000 Penn Collins http://www.screenjunkies.com/?post_type=video&p=261048 He's still not as bad as a self-described "foodie." Ugh.

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Bon Appétit, in their fervent pursuit of food and truths about food, assigned a writer to discuss everything that the portly character Chunk ate or spoke of eating in his time onscreen during The Goonies.

Why? I don’t know. Bon Appetit probably has an office full of food journalists, and sitting around waiting for food to make headlines could be pretty frustrating, so maybe they have to put together their own stories. The story can be found right here, and below I’ve listed a few interesting aspects about the piece/premise of the article:

  • The writer had never seen The Goonies before this assignment, which is surprising, until you see that her name is Rochelle, at which time you come to the realization that you don’t expect people named Rochelle to have the same life experiences us regular folk have.
  • The piece contains prose like this in discussing the Truffle Shuffle: “There are neither ganache-covered chocolates nor foraged fungi; the only shuffling is of Chunk’s ample belly.” The only shuffling is of Chunk’s ample belly. And that thought is preceded by a semicolon. This writer clearly doesn’t want to be a web writer for much longer. I bet Rochelle does her first drafts with ink and quill.
  • I don’t know what I was expecting, but after clicking the tag “truffle shuffle,” I was a little disappointed that there weren’t any other Bon Appetit articles with that tag. I would have been happy with just some Truffle Shuffle steak fries or Truffle Shuffle vinaigrette.
  • If these quotes and my memory are to be trusted, Chunk, in his ramblings about ice cream, brings up grape. Grape ice cream. And then apple. Where the hell is this kid getting cravings for grape and apple ice cream?
  • Chunk’s mom greets him after his rescue with Domino’s pizza, “his favorite.” Even if they managed to go on a pirate adventure and singlehandedly save the community from Troy’s dipshit dad, they’re still kids. And kids don’t know the first thing about good food.
  • The writer, the lovely Rochelle, ate during her screening of the film: “Two glasses of rosé, half a kabocha squash, an entire head of kale (I am not ashamed), and a handful of pecans.” First of all, this means that not only could Rochelle and I never get married, but probably never even be friends. Not because of her taste in food (which seems like the diet of a wealthy rabbit), but because she’s the type of person that makes eating a head of kale seem like a transgression that requires explaining. “Ugh. I had two rice cakes today. I’m such a cow.” I bet in job interviews, she lists her biggest weakness as being a “bit of a perfectionist.” Also, if you’re conveying what you’ve eaten today, and you list a “handful” of anything, I won’t like you ever again.

This list does beg the question of how you you follow up such a great character with his (supposed) re-appearance in a (supposed) sequel. The real Chunk is skinny these days (see?) So maybe they have to give him some other fun indulgence, like sex addiction, bulimia, or cutting.

I think America, in an effort to shed its reputation for unbridled decadence, would clamor to see a former child actor cut himself onscreen just so he can feel like he’s in control of SOMETHING.

Nah. Give him a big blueberry milkshake to spill on his skinny little head. You’re out of blueberry ice cream? Ok. Just give him some grape.

 

 

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In Honor Of Schweddy Balls: 7 Movie And TV-Inspired Ben & Jerry’s Flavors http://www.screenjunkies.com/movies/movie-news/in-honor-of-schweddy-balls-7-movie-and-tv-inspired-ben-jerrys-flavors/ http://www.screenjunkies.com/movies/movie-news/in-honor-of-schweddy-balls-7-movie-and-tv-inspired-ben-jerrys-flavors/#comments Thu, 08 Sep 2011 20:33:17 +0000 Wookie Johnson http://www.screenjunkies.com/?p=227495 You know your balls taste great when an ice cream is named in their honor. Congratulations, Alec Baldwin!

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You know your balls taste great when an ice cream is named in their honor. Congratulations, Alec Baldwin! That’s right. Ice cream makers Ben & Jerry have concocted “Schweddy Balls,” a new flavor based off Baldwin’s famous NPR-skewering Saturday Night Live skit.

Ben & Jerry’s spokesman Sean Greenwood says, “We’ve always been a company that has had a sense of humor.” Sometimes, he said, they spend time discussing serious business and other times “we just do fun.” And what’s more fun than double entendre?

Schweddy Balls will be available for a limited time in about 30 percent of stores that carry Ben & Jerry’s ice cream. In honor of the new flavor, here are seven movie and TV inspired flavors that Ben & Jerry’s should totally make.

Truffle Shuffle

Get that gut jiggling in no time! Vanilla ice cream loaded with chunks of chocolate truffles and broken bits of Baby Ruth. You’ll have no trouble gaining access to the gate, but you might have some trouble fitting through it!

Everybody Loves Rum Raisin

This Italian-inspired gelato will take you home again. This creamy dessert boasts succulent rum-soaked raisins, so don’t plan on driving home from the scoop shop! Unless your brother is a cop.

The Human Centipede’s Fudge Tunnel

Wait until you wrap your lips around this Core Concoction. Based upon the hit film The Human Centipede, it’s three layers of vanilla, strawberry, and Asian green tea surrounding a column of dark German fudge. Perfect to share with friends!! You won’t be able to keep your mouth off of it.

Game Of Cones

Winter is coming. And it’s going to be delicious! This cold strawberry-swirled pint is packed with chocolate-coated waffle cone. Everyone is losing their heads about it.

Rocky Road Trip: Beer Pong

It’s time to hit the road to Flavor Country. This vanilla malt is overflowing with peanut butter, pretzels, and chocolate mice. Grab your brosefs and pledge that you love it. Proceeds from all sales go to paying DJ Qualls’ rent.

Total Reese’s-Call

There’s no way you can forget how delicious this recipe tastes. Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups and Reese’s Pieces blended together in red cocoa ice cream will simply take your breath away. Made exclusively with cream from three-uddered cows, your eyes will bug out for this taste of the future!!

Kramer vs. Krispy Kremer

Life is so full of tough choices. But there should be no difficulty picking your favorite ice cream. This glazed donut flavored treat is a no brainer. Heaping with generous amounts of rainbow and chocolate sprinkles, will it be your favorite? You be the judge!!

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7 Lesser-Known Celebrity-Owned Restaurants http://www.screenjunkies.com/movies/movie-news/7-lesser-known-celebrity-owned-restaurants/ http://www.screenjunkies.com/movies/movie-news/7-lesser-known-celebrity-owned-restaurants/#comments Thu, 25 Aug 2011 22:28:26 +0000 Wookie Johnson http://www.screenjunkies.com/?p=225958 Check out these celeb-owned off-the-radar establishments.

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Mark Wahlberg and his brother Donnie are getting into the restaurant game. The Boston Herald reports they will open their own grill restaurant under the cutesy moniker, “Wahlburgers.” Whoopi Goldberg is probably kicking herself.

However, that got us to wondering which other celebrities have delved into the restaurant biz? Sure, there are your House Of Blues chains and Michael Jordan’s Steakhouses, but what of the smaller establishments that might not be on the map yet? Check them out.

Tim Curry Heaven

Christian Bale’s O, Goooooood Food Youuuuuuuu!

Churrascaria of a Mad Black Woman

(Click ‘Next Page’ to Continue)

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