"You know, sometimes I think I’d rather have my old wife-murdering neighbor back." 

Sorry, Jimmy. You’ll have to settle for the fat nerd and these links:

_{How To Convince Your GF That The House Is Haunted (HolyTaco)}

_{Matt Holiday Blows It For The Cardinals (TotalProSports)}

_{Caught Red Handed Lookin’ At Boobies (TheChive)}

_{Terry Gilliam’s Favorite Animated Films (FilmDrunk)}

_{The 10 Greatest Books Adapted Into Movies (SuperTremendous)}

_{The Boogieman Project Round II (Pajiba)}

_{Miley’s Boyfriend Forced Her To Quit Twitter (CelebJihad)}

_{14 Coolest Guitar Hero Guitar Mods (Unreality)}

_{World’s Larget Pumpkin Cannon In Action (Asylum)}

_{Why We Love College Football: A Gallery (BustedCoverage)}

_{Backyard Wrestling Ends Badly (RegretfulMorning)}

_{How To Make A Perfect First Impression (MadeMan)}

_{Audrina Patridge Thinks She Loves NASCAR (AllLeftTurns)}

_{Soccer Player Brutally Kicked In The Head (NothingToxic)}

_{Where Does Chocolate Milk Come From? (Atom)}