Well played, Walk of Fame. Well played. Except that Whitney Houston already has a star on the world famous sidewalk. Why the change of heart? Granted, she received the star years before Bobby Brown went public with the story about the time he pulled a lodged doodoo bubble out of her booty, however who are you to judge? It used to be that anyone who was a public figure in their field for five years and willing to spend $30,000 was welcome to buy the honor. Is reality money not good enough for you? Besides Mob Wives money, of course.

Ana Martinez, vice president for media relations and producer for the Hollywood Walk of Fame, explains that “It’s just not on the radar for us right now.”

Martinez tells CNN that nominees need to meet the Hollywood Chamber of Commerce’s criteria: awards and honors in entertainment, philanthropic work, as well as longevity in the field and the willingness to agree to the ceremony and pay $30,000 for the star’s installation and upkeep on the street.

Okay. Then let’s go down that checklist.

If the committee is true to their word, there are reality stars that actually fit the bill. Think of those mainstays that are always punching each other on The Real World/Road Rules Challenges. They’ve been at that for a decade at least. I’d consider that show’s $160,000 prize and Kia Sorrentos that they give away to count as both an award AND an honor. As far as philanthropic work goes, porn counts. That just leaves the matter of the $30,000 fee. Dunbar, are you good for it?

Okay. Perhaps the Douchebag Olympians aren’t the best example. Let’s move on to Paris Hilton and Kim Kardashian. Both have been mainstays in the reality spotlight for a good deal of time. They’ve appeared on The Simple Life as far back as 2003. The $30,000 fee shouldn’t be a problem either. They reportedly make $50K per tweet. Then there’s the philanthropic work. Once again, porn counts. Other than that, they’ve both funded AIDS research. As far as awards go, I’ll have you know that Hilton has three Razzies and one Teen Choice whereas Kardashian also has a Teen Choice award (she came close to winning a Razzie for her performance in Disaster Movie but was edged out by Hilton’s performance in Hottie and the Nottie).

Sounds to me like we have two successful young ladies who have proven themselves against all categories. And YOU KNOW they love a good ceremony. Now, if you don’t mind, give them their dumb stars already.