Now to what “bastard” am I referring?

Marvel’s Big Hero 6, which comes our way on November 7, 2014. The film follows a scientist and his robot who, along with myriad other colorful crimefighters, will take down the bad guys in a fictional city known as San Fransokyo.

Unsurprisingly, it looks as though Disney is trying to find the natural overlap between its core animation audience and the more kid-friendly Marvel titles. So far, so good.

Entertainment Weekly has learned details on two of the spin-off projects: A young Han Solo saga, focusing on the wisecracking smuggler’s origin story, and a bounty hunter adventure with Boba Fett at the center of a rogue’s gallery of galactic scum. Sources close to the projects confirmed this was the direction the development was taking, although they cautioned it’s still very early in the process.
The Han Solo story would take place in the time period between Revenge of the Sith and the first Star Wars (now known as A New Hope), so although it’s possible Harrison Ford could appear as a framing device, the movie would require a new actor for the lead — one presumably much younger than even the 35-year-old Ford when he appeared in the 1977 original.

The Boba Fett film would take place either between A New Hope and The Empire Strikes Back, or between Empire and Jedi, where the bounty hunter was last seen plunging unceremoniously into a sarlacc pit. Exactly who would play him isn’t much of a complication – in the original trilogy, he never took off his helmet. And in the prequels, we learned he was the son of the original stormtrooper clone, played by Temuera Morrison, who’s still the right age for the part if his services were required.

Somewhere in Hollywood, at this very moment, a screenwriter is hunched over a laptop supplying Ryan Reynolds with glib zingers he’ll use the first time he meets Chewbacca. Excuse me while I walk blindly into traffic.

Although it is awesome, the 1991 film was considered a flop at the time with a domestic box office haul of $46 million. Disney is meeting with writers to discuss an updated take on the classic character. No word yet on casting or particulars or whether or not The Rocketeer will use words like ‘swag’ and ‘YOLO’. All that is known is that with two The Rocketeers in the world, it’s going to get mighty confusing which is which when The Disney Channel re-airs the fuck out of them. (Vulture)

This is a classic scenario that we’ve seen time-and-time again in the science fiction genre. Which isn’t to say it isn’t awesome, because it is. See for yourself with these 9 classic examples.

Star Wars: Episode VI – Return of the Jedi

The opening scenes of Return of the Jedi are some of the best in the series. That’s solely because we’re introduced to badass Luke Skywalker. Boosted by the confidence that mastering the Force brings, he strolls into Jabba’s throne room and demands the release of Han Solo. He’s laughed off and thrown into the Rancor pit, where he is to die for Jabba’s amusement. Of course, no one is laughing when Skywalker punks the Rancor.

Mad Max Beyond Thunderdome

After being car-jacked, Mad Max finds himself in the post-apocalyptic craphole known as “Bartertown.” This is where people go to trade food and goods and take in a fight to the death or two. Max finds himself in the arena where he’s forced to take on the mutant Master Blaster, which is technically two against one. Or one-and-a-half against one. Or whatever.

The Coneheads

When Beldar Conehead returned to his home planet, his superiors were less than happy with his work on Earth. His punishment: face certain death when he is oredered to NARFTLE THE GARTHOK. However, narftling the Garthok isn’t as impossible as it seems, assuming you get your golf game down to a score of 65.

But jokes aside, it is unusual to see a Confederate character as a protagonist. In John Carter, the main character is a confederate soldier who gets warped to Mars, where he finds himself a hero. As strange as the concept sounds, don’t be scared off by the premise. The film’s source material is excellent and the effects look incredible. In fact, Confederate protagonists are rare but nothing new.

Cold Mountain

In Cold Mountain, Jude Law plays W.P. Inman, a Confederate soldier who grows disillusioned with the war. While recovering from an injury, he sets off in the night to head for home. We follow the deserter as he treks through the elements and blows off all of the hot ass that the 1860′s had to offer so that he can reunite with his love.

The Outlaw Josey Wales

The Outlaw Josey Wales tells a bit of revisionist history. Clint Eastwood stars as Josey Wales, a farmer turned killing machine after the brutal death of his wife and son at the hands of pro-Union Jayhawkers. Wales then makes it his cause to decimate the entire Union army with a Gatling Gun. It’s hard to root for a Confederate, but it’s also hard not to when they are this badass.

The dogs seem pretty heavily sedated and uneasy, but isn’t that how love makes you feel? I think so. Also, they didn’t even give the dogs real meatballs, but let’s pretend that right after this scene ended, the dogs were given a tray of meatballs, then made love, doggy-style, in a candle-lit dog house.

So here’s to the purest love we know – dog love used to sell copies of a re-released film, now available on Blu-Ray!

Now go eat those chocolates!

“Phil Collins,” he answered without hesitation. “Better drum sound.”

While clearly a talented comedian, it was McKenzie’s love of all things music that made him the perfect choice for The Muppets, a fact that the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences seems to recognize. His Oscar nomination for Best Original Song stems not from his ability to write entertaining lyrics, but rather his ability to do so in a way that also pays tribute to the source material.

“I just really wanted to make something that felt like it belonged to that world.”

McKenzie stresses that as with Flight of the Conchords, writing for The Muppets wasn’t about simply parodying the work of Jim Henson, but rather paying homage.

“A lot of the Choncords’ music comes from a similar place. There’s a lot of respect in it, and a lot of love goes in it. And I think that really comes through in the final product.”

But in order to give a proper tribute, McKenzie had to learn the rules of the the Muppet franchise, a task that proved daunting despite his years of being a fan.

“I had to learn the rules about the Muppets‘ world,” McKenzie said, still impressed by the level of detail involved. “Sam the Eagle refused to sing one of the lines in the song because it didn’t fit his character. So I rewrote the lyric in the studio for the character.”

But having to rewrite lyrics for a felt-based prima donna didn’t seem to diminish his enthusiasm. If anything, McKenzie came away with a renewed appreciation of the characters.

“Going into it, I loved Animal. Going out of it, I just loved Statler and Waldorf, the two old guys. Because now that I’ve made a TV show, seeing how they … criticize their own show within the show, it’s just such a great idea. It means that if an idea or a sketch isn’t working, they can point it out to the audience. It’s so self aware.”

This awareness of the audience was inspiring yet intimidating to McKenzie. While he felt honored to be part of the project, he knew that expectations were ridiculously high, a fact that he and the film’s creators took very seriously.

“Sometimes it felt like I cared more about it than the studio,” he said. “They’ll do whatever, it’s more of a business model. So we were really the guardians of this magical world. And there was a lot of pressure. So there was that responsibility.”

But at the end of the day, the overwhelmingly positive reception by fans and critics alike seems to have validated McKenzie’s commitment.

“My favorite comment was people saying ‘It felt like a Muppet Movie,’ cause that was my aim, and I think we all achieved that. And that’s why I’m really proud of it.”

Beauty and the Beast 3D looked like a new movie. The use of 3D was able to breathe new life into the film. So even if you’re a big fan who has seen it before, it’s worth experiencing again. Besides, what else are you going to go and see this weekend? Joyful Noise?

So what’s my beef, then? A little thing called continuity.

(Spoiler Alert)

Before my screening at the El Capitan Theater, the audience was treated to a song and dance routine performed by the stars of the film, Belle and the Beast. No complaints there. Belle is even hotter in person than she is in the movie, and the Beast looked pretty bad ass himself, except for that stupid blue suit they had him wearing. All in all, it was an enjoyable experience… or so I thought.

At the end of the film, I watched the Beast transform back into a handsome prince. This raises an important question; If the Beast is no longer a monster, then who in the hell was that dancing on stage before the screening? Sure, it looked a lot like the Beast, but logically, that’s impossible, because the curse was broken, and the Beast as we knew him no longer exists! Does Disney think that just because the crowd was made up of children and movie bloggers that we wouldn’t be able to figure it out? I might be stupid, but I’m not blind! While I’m not blind, I am insulted. For all I know, that was some hairy drunken hobo prancing around on stage with Belle, ’cause it sure as hell wasn’t the Beast! For shame, Disney.

The film is directed by Joe Johnston, better known for last summer’s Captain America: The First Avenger. That film’s success probably had more to do with this Blu-ray release than the “20th Anniversary” milestone quoted on the cover. But however it happened, it’s nice to finally get The Rocketeer in high definition.

How does it look? Good, if not great. Certainly the picture is miles above the previous DVD release, but it is still a bit washed out compared to other Blu-ray transfers from the early 90′s. But the sound is excellent; as good as I’ve ever heard the film.

The only real disappointment with this release is that it contains the film, a trailer, and nothing else. I know The Rocketeer wasn’t a huge hit for Disney, but certainly they could have sweetened the package a bit for the die hard fans. Any behind the scenes clips or deleted scenes would have helped make it a better value than the previous DVD, which also featured zero special features. To call it the “20th Anniversary” edition and feature just the trailer is kind of a cruel tease.

Still, how does the film hold up after all these years? It’s still slightly corny, but a lot of fun. By making the movie an earnest slice of pre-WW II nostalgia, Johnston gave it a timeless feel, respectful of it’s comic book roots and engaging to audiences of any age. Hopefully, this release will help expand The Rocketeer’s devoted fan base, and by the time the 30th Anniversary rolls around, we’ll get some extras we can celebrate. The Rocketeer is available in stores now, with a SRP of $26.50.

No word on whether he’s pro or anti Martian slavery, but he’s got a spotty track record. Also, there’s no explanation as to why they don’t believe in shirts on Mars.

John Carter is directed by Andrew Stanton and opens in theaters March 9th, 2012.

Crazy Harry

Crazy Harry is known for his love of explosions. This may not qualify exactly as pyromania, but it was close enough for the original Muppet producers to shift his character to the background after The Muppet Show’s first few years. He did have a great cameo in the original Muppet Movie, however, and will be on hand (hopefully with dynamite) in the new film.

Lew Zealand

Although most casual Muppet fans don’t know his name, Lew Zealand is pretty recognizable as the Muppet with the amazing boomerang fish. He’s also very creepy in his appearance. Still though, at least he doesn’t have an explosives fetish, like Harry.

Pepe the King Prawn

This bizarre character is relatively new to the Muppet world, first appearing on Muppet’s Tonight. Pepe has a heavy Spanish accent, and takes great pride in being a Prawn, as opposed to a shrimp. In fact, he looks down upon shrimp, which pretty much makes him the only bigoted Muppet, except of course for Big Bird, who hates Mexicans.

Considering that he plays the alcoholic, pansexual PIRATE Jack Sparrow in the Pirates franchise, you wouldn’t think there would be much of an issue with an actor playing another role, even one such at Paul Kemp in The Rum Diary.

I guess he’s not the fun kind of alcoholic in that film. Maybe his contract stipulates that he can only portray depraved characters if he has scarves in his hair. I have the same clause in my pre-nup with my wife, which is why I’ve gone as Steven Tyler the past nine Halloweens.

After a spiraling budget and bizarre script that contained, among other things, werewolves, Disney put everyone associated with the project in time-out until they could reach a hard budget of $215 million. Now that the budget is there, The Lone Ranger is once again in production. Reportedly, the poor box office performance of Cowboys and Aliens had Disney execs concerned about the viability of high-concept westerns, even those that star Johnny Depp as a Native American sidekick.

The big question now is whether or not the delayed 2012 start will afford Verbinski and Co. the ability to adhere to their December 21, 2012 release date. (Deadline)

However, there are a few other films out there that deserved their chance to frighten and exhilarate thousands of excited fans. But alas, for some reason or another, the deals never went through. Here are seven films that would undoubtedly make kick-ass amusement park attractions.

Final Destination 3

Though it would be tough to get the insurance companies on board, Final Destination 3 would make an excellent roller-coaster. Think of how scared you and your friends would be knowing that the brakes and safety equipment could give at any moment. But which moment? It’s the anticipation that’s truly scary.

Titanic

Titanic has thrill ride written all over it. Imagine the rush as you cling to a railing with icy water rushing to meet you. Then your life boat-shaped pod drops and stops just short of making a splash before rising up and doing it all over again.

“Avatar created a world which audiences can discover again and again and now, through this incredible partnership with Disney, we’ll be able to bring Pandora to life like never before. With two new Avatar films currently in development, we’ll have even more locations, characters and stories to explore,” said James Cameron in a press release. “I’m chomping at the bit to start work with Disney’s legendary Imagineers to bring our Avatar universe to life. Our goal is to go beyond current boundaries of technical innovation and experiential storytelling, and give park goers the chance to see, hear, and touch the world of Avatar with an unprecedented sense of reality.”

That’s awesome news for Cameron. How gratifying it must be to see a world you created turned into an experience. I think we all can agree that Titanic would have made an awesome ride. (Deadline)

Described as Toy Story with video games, it sounds like a lot of fun. Keep Michael Cera away from it and you’ve got a hit. (/Film)

The first one involves, of course, dinosaurs. Set for release on November 27, 2013 (Pixar is nothing if not prepared), the currently untitled project will be directed by Bob Peterson, who most recently co-directed Pixar’s Up. According to the panel the movie “centers around an alternate version of earth wherein the asteroid that wiped out the dinosaurs missed the planet entirely, so humans have evolved side-by-side with dinosaurs.” Some analysts have pointed out that this is weirdly similar to the premise of that live-action Mario Bros. movie, which might make this a good time to go ahead and admit that I haven’t seen the live-action Mario Bros. movie.

Girls Can Play Too In Pixar's 'Brave' Teaser

God bless Disney!

A lot of questions were raised by Friday’s news that the plug had been pulled on The Lone Ranger until the budget could be brought down from the current $250 million. Screenwriter Ted Elliott shed some light on the project, much of which explains the huge budget. You can go ahead and cringe now, just to get it out of the way.

It was going to be a Tonto show mainly. Tonto as the top dog and more dominant than the Lone Ranger. Tonto and the Indian spirits like Obi Wan Kenobi and the force. The driving engine was going to be Native American occult aspects worked in with werewolves and special effects, [b]ut flavored with doses of Native American spirituality in a serious way.

Also, the recent flop Cowboys and Aliens soured the studio on the mashup of werewolves and cowboys and Indians. Possibly they were turned off of the idea of a mashup, and possibly they just realized that sometimes audiences don’t like really dumb movies.

So now we have to wait for Disney to replace all the werewolves with sexy vampires, and we’ll be good to go.

They’ve approached Mark Romanek with a script from Th Devil Wears Prada scribe Aline Brosh McKenna under their arm, in the hopes that the Never Let Me Go director will agree to take the lead. In this update, the prince is set for a politically arranged marriage until he meets and falls in love with Cinderella, despite her pumpkin car and rodent friends. We can’t choose who we love, Dad! (Deadline)

6 photosJennifer Garner

Oh but what they find is far more gruesome. It’s their perfect kid that they had just geeked out over. But how is this so and who is this kid? And why are his arms so long?? We here at Screen Junkies feel it best that a child like this be turned over to the government for dissection. Just think of what we could learn from this strange visitor.

FUN FACT: If you watch this trailer in reverse, Jennifer Garner buries a child alive.

There’s also a rumor that the cast and clips from The Lone Ranger could be appearing, but if you breathe that rumor in anything more than a whisper, it will likely vanish forever.

As if that wasn’t enough, we’re also getting Disney’s current stars, including, but not limited to, Jack McBreyer, Sarah Silverman, Jennifer Garner, Jason Segel, Taylor Kitsch, Willem Dafoe, and some dude named Kermit.

There will also be a panel and profile of the Pixar creative team, and, if you want to dork out REALLY hard, one featuring many of the Disney execs. YES! The convention floor will be riddled with props from the latest Pirates of the Caribbean film, though no explanation will be given as to how it made so much goddamn money.

See ya in Anaheim!

Not.