Screen Junkies » darth vader http://www.screenjunkies.com Movie Reviews & TV Show Reviews Tue, 16 Dec 2014 01:54:36 +0000 en hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.3.3 Darth Vader Plans His Takeover Of The Magic Kingdom http://www.screenjunkies.com/video/darth-vader-plans-his-takeover-of-the-magic-kingdom/ http://www.screenjunkies.com/video/darth-vader-plans-his-takeover-of-the-magic-kingdom/#comments Thu, 01 Nov 2012 19:19:04 +0000 Wookie Johnson http://www.screenjunkies.com/?post_type=video&p=251805 Who to choke the air out of first?

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In reaction to the news that Disney has purchased the rights to Star Wars sequels from LucasFilm, Darth Vader decided to swing by the Magical Kingdom to see who he should enslave and crush first. It’s a cute video, but seriously Disney? Everyone knows that Darth Vader dies at the end of Chapter VI, so there’s no way he can appear in the next trilogy. Would it kill you to pay attention to the details? We’re trusting you with this, mmmkay? Don’t f*ck it up.

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R.I.P. ‘Star Wars’ Designer Ralph McQuarrie http://www.screenjunkies.com/movies/movie-news/r-i-p-star-wars-designer-ralph-mcquarrie/ http://www.screenjunkies.com/movies/movie-news/r-i-p-star-wars-designer-ralph-mcquarrie/#comments Mon, 05 Mar 2012 14:00:26 +0000 Wookie Johnson http://www.screenjunkies.com/?p=246755 Fun Fact: Han Solo used to wear a cape.

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The legendary concept artist who designed science fiction‘s most iconic characters has died. Ralph McQuarrie passed away on March 3rd at the age of 82.

Best known for bringing the world of Star Wars to visual life, McQuarrie worked with George Lucas to establish the look of not only characters like Darth Vader and Han Solo, but also the universe itself through its all of its incarnations. The picture below shows Han Solo (looking stylish with a beard and cape) with light saber drawn as he prepares to battle a light saber wielding Storm Trooper. Says McQuarrie of the illustration: “I gave Han Solo a light saber, and I thought it was reasonable to assume that the opposing forces would have the same weapons.”

Here’s another look at what could have been, an early concept of C3PO and R2-D2 before Lucas gave McQuarrie the note, “Make them look gayer.”

Our condolences to Mr. McQuarrie’s loved ones and millions of fans worldwide. (Ars Technica)

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Darth Power http://www.screenjunkies.com/general/darth-power/ http://www.screenjunkies.com/general/darth-power/#comments Thu, 09 Feb 2012 18:02:59 +0000 Screen Junkies http://www.screenjunkies.com/?p=245051

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Amazing Letter From A Slave (Darth Vader) To His Former Master (Watto) http://www.screenjunkies.com/movies/movie-news/amazing-letter-from-a-slave-darth-vader-to-his-former-master-watto/ http://www.screenjunkies.com/movies/movie-news/amazing-letter-from-a-slave-darth-vader-to-his-former-master-watto/#comments Thu, 02 Feb 2012 18:47:01 +0000 David Dietle http://www.screenjunkies.com/?p=244322 Amazing!

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Recently, this letter from a freed slave to his former master has been making the rounds on the Internet. As such, we thought we’d bring your attention to another letter written by a former slave to his old owner.

In the year 35, Watto of Tatooine wrote to his former slave, Anakin Skywalker, and requested the he come back and work in his shop.  Anakin – who, since being rescued and raised by the Jedi, had moved to Coruscant, had found paid work as a Sith lord and was now ruling the known universe with an iron fist along with Emperor Palpatine – responded spectacularly by way of hologram transcribed below (a letter which, according to Bothan spies, he dictated).

Coruscant

August 7, 30

To My Old Master, Watto, Mos Espa, Tatooine

Sir: I got your letter, and was surprised to find you had not forgotten Anakin, and that you wanted me to come back and live with you again, promising to do better for me than anybody else can.  Apparently you missed that I have long since become more powerful than you could possibly imagine. I thought my troops would have burned you to a skeleton when they were on Tatooine a few years back, but since they didn’t shoot down an escape pod that contained devastating information about the Empire, I guess it’s understandable that they missed my order to turn you into a smear, too. Although you sold me to Jedi who taught me how to use the Force and a lightsaber, you were still an asshat, and I was pleased at the thought that you had perished. Although you never actually hurt me, I would have been pleased to find you had suffered. I never missed my old home, it was a hole, and you might want to tell the bots, the Jawas and that fat woman with the six boobs that hangs around your shop to keep their distance; the crater that will be left in your wake will be substantial. In fact, the whole planet will be gone. And they aren’t Jedi so I won’t be seeing them in the next life. I still recall the last time I saw you. You looked (and smelled) like shit.

I was wondering what you thought you could offer me; you smelling like a flying turd and me being telekinetic. I am doing tolerably well as the vice president of evil. I don’t need money, and I get the best food available, period, and a comfortable space station with my now deceased wife, Padme, – the folks called her Senator. And I even have a son, Luke, although we are not on good terms. Obi Wan says the boy has a good head for a Jedi. I am feared, as it should be. I overheared others on Alderaan saying “Darth Vader was a slave.” But I feel no disgrace (plus, we blew the shit out of Alderaan.)

As to my freedom, which you say I can have, there is nothing to be gained on that score, as Qui Gon Jin bought me back when I was a kid. I propose a test to see if I should bother sending a detachment of Imperial Walkers to that dust ball to turn you into agonized plasma or not by asking for the wages for the time me and my mother served you. At unlimited resources for me, and not being dead for my mother, I served you faithfully for 10 years, and my mother, what was it, 40 something? Before that, our earning would amount to you being SO f*cking dead. Add to that the interest for the time our wages have been kept back, and deduct what you paid for me being born, clothing and feeding us, and the year or two my mom took care of all your shit before you sold her. Please send the money Smuggler’s Express, in care of Mango Fett, fabulous Bounty Hunter and Designer. Here I am nigh a supreme ruler with the full powers of the dark side at my disposal; but on Tatooine, there was never a pay-day for the human slaves any more than for banthas and dewbacks. Surely there will be a day of reckoning for those who defraud a laborer of his hire. (and your is coming pretty fast)

In answering this letter, please state if there would be any safety for my Leia, who is now grown up and I hear wears metal bikinis. You know how it was with that Twi’Lek chick over at Jabba’s. I would rather stay here and be waited on hand and foot than to… Okay, I can’t keep up the charade. My kid’s not going to Tatooine, and you’ll be dead shortly after reading this.

Say howdy to Qui Gon when you are dead and thank him for winning me from you.

From your old servant,

Anakin Skywalker Darth Vader

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Star Roars! http://www.screenjunkies.com/general/star-roars/ http://www.screenjunkies.com/general/star-roars/#comments Wed, 01 Feb 2012 18:48:42 +0000 Screen Junkies http://www.screenjunkies.com/?p=244366

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‘The Empire Strikes Back’ Reveal Shocks This Little Kid http://www.screenjunkies.com/video/the-empire-strikes-back-reveal-shocks-this-little-kid/ http://www.screenjunkies.com/video/the-empire-strikes-back-reveal-shocks-this-little-kid/#comments Mon, 03 Oct 2011 21:59:21 +0000 Penn Collins http://www.screenjunkies.com/?post_type=video&p=231018 I don't want to give it away, but someone is someone else's father, and this kid just can't believe it.

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This kid cannot BELIEVE what is going on at the end of The Empire Strikes Back. If you look carefully, you can see him emote virtually every human emotion on the spectrum. The sister seems initially as shocked as her brother does, but quickly picks her jaw up off the floor, unlike her flabbergasted sibling.

No wonder the mom or dad whipped out the video camera for this thing. Seeing Star Wars (and Empire and Jedi) for the first time is a seminal moment in anyone’s life, but the fact that this little moppet was rocking a Daily Bugle t-shirt leads me to believe that he might like this type of thing more than most.

I’ll bet you even money this kid shits himself when he watches The Sixth Sense for the first time.

 

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Chef Vader http://www.screenjunkies.com/tv/tv-photos/chef-vader/ http://www.screenjunkies.com/tv/tv-photos/chef-vader/#comments Wed, 25 May 2011 18:50:16 +0000 Jame Gumb http://www.screenjunkies.com/?p=213740 Bon appetit!

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Bon appetit!

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Sith Pimpin’ http://www.screenjunkies.com/movies/movie-photos/sith-pimpin/ http://www.screenjunkies.com/movies/movie-photos/sith-pimpin/#comments Sun, 10 Apr 2011 17:27:29 +0000 Jame Gumb http://www.screenjunkies.com/?p=206451 Is Vader gonna have to force choke a bitch?

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Is Vader gonna have to forc choke a bitch?

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Welp, I’m About To Blow All Of Yourses Minds http://www.screenjunkies.com/video/welp-im-about-to-blow-all-of-yourses-minds/ http://www.screenjunkies.com/video/welp-im-about-to-blow-all-of-yourses-minds/#comments Wed, 12 Jan 2011 14:03:42 +0000 Wookie Johnson http://www.screenjunkies.com/?post_type=Video&p=15579 Somebody finally took the initiative and re-cast Darth Vader with Tommy Wiseau. Unlike Star Wars or The Room, the results are intentionally hilarious.

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Somebody finally took the initiative and re-cast Darth Vader with Tommy Wiseau. Unlike Star Wars or The Room, the results are intentionally hilarious. This isn’t the slickest editing job and it’s a little long in some parts, but when they get it right they get it so right. Like, laugh out loud and annoy your girlfriend right. Besides wouldn’t you expect bad pacing, clunky editing, and nonsensical dialogue from a George LucasTommy Wiseau collaboration? Commitment to form, I say. (via Topless Robot with more episodes HERE)

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Darth Vader Falls On Hard Times, Robs Bank http://www.screenjunkies.com/movies/movie-news/darth-vader-falls-on-hard-times-robs-bank/ http://www.screenjunkies.com/movies/movie-news/darth-vader-falls-on-hard-times-robs-bank/#comments Wed, 30 Nov -0001 00:00:00 +0000 A bank teller in Long Island was surprised yesterday morning when approached by a gun-toting Darth Vader. The Sith Lord forced the teller to empty their drawer before fleeing. We all heard the stories of Lucasfilm banning the original Darth David Prowse from Star Wars events, but who would have dreamed he'd resort to this? Of course, I joke. This is obviously another stunt from Improv Everywhere. Give it up, guys. You can only run for so long. (Newsday)

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A bank teller in Long Island was surprised yesterday morning when approached by a gun-toting Darth Vader. The Sith Lord forced the teller to empty their drawer before fleeing.

We all heard the stories of Lucasfilm banning the original Darth David Prowse from Star Wars events, but who would have dreamed he’d resort to this? Of course, I joke. This is obviously another stunt from Improv Everywhere. Give it up, guys. You can only run for so long. (Newsday)

 

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Darth Vader’s Voice Now Available for TomTom GPS Systems http://www.screenjunkies.com/movies/movie-news/darth-vaders-voice-now-available-for-tomtom-gps-systems/ http://www.screenjunkies.com/movies/movie-news/darth-vaders-voice-now-available-for-tomtom-gps-systems/#comments Wed, 30 Nov -0001 00:00:00 +0000 Thirty-five years ago, this article's headline would have made absolutely no sense. Today, it has the power to send millions of nerds into a frenzy. TomTom has released a Darth Vader voice for their GPS system (a.k.a. nav computer). For just $13, the Sith Lord can guide you anywhere you need to go. Unfortunately, most Star Wars fans already know the way to their parents' basement, so the application is virtually useless. In addition to Vader, the voices of C-3PO, Yoda, and Han Solo are all slated to be released this summer. That's all fine and good, but I long for the day when I can type my address into my TomTom and hear the soothing voice of Jar Jar Binks tell me, "Wessa Goin' Home!" (Collider) Check out Darth Vader's TomTom recording session after the jump.

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Thirty-five years ago, this article’s headline would have made absolutely no sense. Today, it has the power to send millions of nerds into a frenzy.

TomTom has released a Darth Vader voice for their GPS system (a.k.a. nav computer). For just $13, the Sith Lord can guide you anywhere you need to go. Unfortunately, most Star Wars fans already know the way to their parents’ basement, so the application is virtually useless.

In addition to Vader, the voices of C-3PO, Yoda, and Han Solo are all slated to be released this summer. That’s all fine and good, but I long for the day when I can type my address into my TomTom and hear the soothing voice of Jar Jar Binks tell me, "Wessa Goin’ Home!" (Collider)

Check out Darth Vader’s TomTom recording session after the jump.

 

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Darth Vader’s Winter Vacation http://www.screenjunkies.com/movies/movie-news/darth-vaders-winter-vacation/ http://www.screenjunkies.com/movies/movie-news/darth-vaders-winter-vacation/#comments Wed, 30 Nov -0001 00:00:00 +0000 Darth Vaders Winter Vacation - Watch more Funny VideosYou'd think a Lord would do better with the ladies. Darth Vader's attempt to bag some tail while on vacation proves fruitless, and quite honestly, uber depressing for someone with such a sweet breathing apparatus. Don't drink and dial, Vader. No one wins at that game. (EgoTV)

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Darth Vaders Winter Vacation – Watch more Funny Videos

You’d think a Lord would do better with the ladies. Darth Vader’s attempt to bag some tail while on vacation proves fruitless, and quite honestly, uber depressing for someone with such a sweet breathing apparatus. Don’t drink and dial, Vader. No one wins at that game. (EgoTV)

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