^{Smells like Oscar.}

Now that his totally not-staged downward spiral documentary I’m Still Here is playing before audiences, Joaquin Phoenix is ready to get back in the game. He’s set to star in Big Shoe, a movie that focuses on a shoe fetishist who is also a talented footwear designer. Which could or could not be gross. On the one hand, it’s healthy to be invested in what you do for a living. On the other, I’m proud of that Photoshop I did up above, but I didn’t choke-fap while creating it. I save that kind of bahavior for the Girl Gallery. (THR)