It would seem that due to the actor‘s impending divorce from starlet Katy Perry, he has been disinvited from the awards ceremony. THE PEOPLE HAVE SPOKEN!

But when people are heartbroken, that’s when they need the People’s Choice Awards THE MOST!

Perry is nominated for seven awards, whereas Brand hasn’t gotten shit for his turn in Arthur, so the choice was presumably an easy one for producers. The good news here is that if the split remains acrimonious for a long time, we can expect to not see Russell Brand at a lot of our favorite events.

Silver lining!

The rest of the weekend slate didn’t do as well, with Scream 4, the 4th entry in the increasingly-pointless Scream series, making just under $20 million for second place. The rest of the top spots were filled by old favorites like Hop and Arthur, with the exception of The Conspirator in 9th place with a $3.9 million gross. Perhaps if Robert Redford had made The Conspirator a CGI kids’ comedy about Abraham Toucan getting shot in the head by John Wilkes Orangutan, it would be a different story. (Box Office Mojo)

Rounding out the weekend was the pretty excellent Hanna, which managed third place with $12.3 million, and Soul Surfer, the inspirational sports version of Jaws, in fourth place with $11.1 million. I’ve said it for years: If you want to make bank at the box office, you’ve got to have more than one person getting eaten by a shark. (Box Office Mojo)

Russell Brand and Helen Mirren are so good, it makes Arthur entertaining. It’s still the same old contrived Hollywood formula, and it’s not a particularly good version of it, but Brand and Mirren have fun throughout.

In case this seems like an original idea to you, Arthur (Brand) is a billionaire heir to the Bach Worldwide corporation. He gets into trouble dressing as Batman and crashing a Batmobile, which embarrasses his mother Vivienne. Vivienne plans to marry him off to Susan (Jennifer Garner), otherwise she’ll cut him off. It’s at that exact point in his life and the story that he meets whimsical Grand Central Terminal tour guide Naomi (Greta Gerwig). So he’s torn between keeping his money and going with his heart, and his nanny Hobson (Mirren) tries to steer him right.

This is mainly a collection of contrived set pieces, but that’s where Brand does his best work. He goes all out in the proposal dinner scene and doesn’t miss an opportunity to jump around, be foolish or slip in a clever joke. Brand is having fun sneering at the formula he’s stuck in, down to Arthur’s stint working in a candy store.

Hobson is funny despite being pretty mean. Calling women streetwalkers and tarts is just bullying, but Mirren is so classy she pulls off the humor in it. Her references to spoilers are more appreciated than putdowns. Susan is a totally one dimensional villain obsessed with money and status. Her drunk dominatrix schtick is beneath Garner.

Arthur is a good character. As much of his recklessness is selfless, giving away money or helping people achieve their dreams, as the other half is hedonistic. He does want noble things like conversation in a relationship, so the physical promises Susan makes actually offend his sensibilities.

The only modern touches are a brief mention of the recession and an upskirt (upkilt) shot of Arthur’s blurred out junk. I guess you could also count how this remake does what all Hollywood comedies do now and goes all serious. But the movie doesn’t seem to know when Arthur’s learned his lesson so it keeps getting serious and goes way past heartwarming. Then it takes so long to work out the plot with a wedding, running around Queens naked and another whole montage.

You won’t mind watching Arthur because of Brand and Mirren, and Gerwig is sweet, but there’s nothing memorable or hilarious. It’s just pleasant enough, which can be fine. Sometimes we just want to see pretty people have fun. That’s all this Arthur is.

Moviegoers have always been fascinated by wealthy characters, even if those characters happen to be total pricks. After all, if losers like you or me wanted to see people living in squalor, we could simply take a walking tour of our Section 8 housing complex. No, rich people are far more interesting, with their mansions, expensive cars, beautiful women, etc. Who cares if they take part in some unscrupulous business deals, or kill a few hookers? As the following characters prove, enough money will make most problems go away.

Gordon Gekko – Wall Street (1987)

Greed, for lack of a better word, is good. So says Gordon Gekko, the epitome of 80′s excess. Speaking of excess, just look at his fancy mobile phone. It’s so small and compact, yet he’s using it outside at the beach! The f*cking beach! OK, now that they give cellphones away for free, maybe it’s not as impressive. But at the time, that thing must have cost a fortune.

Remember when I said money makes most problems go away? Well, most doesn’t mean all. Gordon ends up heading to the clink for his shady business dealings. I’m not sure what happened when he got out, because I, like everyone else, never watched the sequel.

Billy Madison – Billy Madison (1995)

Billy Madison is a likable guy. But that doesn’t exclude him from being a rich prick. How else would you describe a grown man who is wealthy enough to spend his days reading porno, playing “make believe” in his bathtub, and leaving flaming bags of shit on an old man’s door step?

John Gage – Indecent Proposal (1993)

John Gage is the epitome of a rich prick. He knows he can buy and sell any man in the room. More importantly, he knows he can also buy any man’s wife. Well, almost any man. If he offered me a million dollars for a night with my spouse, I’d have to say know. Call me old fashioned, but I was raised not to take advantage of people.

The Dukes – Trading Places (1983)

The Dukes (Randolph and Mortimer) are wealthy beyond your wildest dreams. But when you can literally buy anything you desire, things tend to get boring. That’s why they decide to spice things up by manipulating a homeless guy and reducing one of their employees to ruins. It’s a great way to pass the time, if you can afford it.

Patrick Bateman – American Psycho (2000)

Having sex with a bevy of beautiful women: boring! Having sex with those women, and then cutting them up into tiny pieces: awesome! At least that’s what rich prick Patrick Bateman thinks. A lot of people find that disturbing, but his other hobby is listening to Phil Collins. Between the two, I’d say it’s a toss up.

Claus von Bülow – Reversal of Fortune (1990)

OK, now do you remember when I said money will fix almost anything? This is a much better example. Claus von Bülow is a real person who was accused of murdering his wife. He was also a fabulously rich prick. The movie tells the story of how Harvard Law Professor Alan Dershowitz got him off the hook. He’s the same guy who helped another rich prick, OJ Simpson, beat his murder rap.

Jeffrey Lebowski – The Big Lebowski (1998)

“I’m a Lebowski, you’re a Lebowski. That’s terrific.”

Jeffrey Lebowski is definitely a prick. But despite the outward appearance of wealth, he’s not actually rich. His daughter controls his estate, and gives him a monthly allowance, which is ample. However, thanks to the unwitting help of another Jeffrey Lebowski (a.k.a. The Dude), he’s able to embezzle a cool million form the Urban Achievers fund, which only adds to his prick-ness.

Charles Foster Kane – Citizen Kane (1941)

What cinematic rich-prick list would be complete without including Charles Foster Kane. After all, he’s the prototype by which all wealthy assholes are judged. In fact, this film is considered the Citizen Kane of rich-pick Movies.

Dudley Moore – Arthur (1981)

Yeah, yeah, yeah: Russell Brand is funny. But when it comes to Arthur, Dudley Moore will always be number one. He’s a drunken wealthy ass, but at the end of the day, he’d be a blast to hang out with.

A word from Jennifer: “There’s something so interesting about the combination of vulnerability and being completely in control at the same time.”

Who says Hollywood is out of ideas? Obviously they haven’t seen this picture of Helen Mirren giving Russell Brand the old "rub & tug" on the set of Arthur. In fact, seeing a geriatric Mirren giving Brand a bathtub HJ is the most original thing I’ve seen in weeks, and mind you, I watch Bravo daily.

The only question is how is Hollywood going to top this? Chances are we’ll see Betty White giving an "Asian massage" to the wolf-boy from Twilight sometime soon. "Team Jacob" indeed! (Cinema Blend)