Last night’s”Modern Family” began with Alex Dunphy’s 8th-grade graduation ceremony, where she, as valedictorian, was about to give a speech. Why an 8th grade class needs a valedictorian is beyond…

It was as if they grabbed an old season finale from “The Wire” and somehow morphed it into a sitcom.

As the episode begins, last week’s western-theme is replaced with a Star Wars motif, complete with stormtrooper-styled paintballers who are fighting on behalf of the mysterious Pistol Patty.

Chills! Suspense! Annie running in slow motion!

Ed O’Neill is awesome, Sofia Vergara is hot, and socially acceptable gay stereotypes are hilarious.

Looking sexy while drinking from a hose is hard work.

The cockamouse is back…this time in .gif form!