Less Than Zero

Sure, their existence is hollow, and they’re simply self-medicating in order to dull their unhappiness, but what a way to self-medicate. These beautiful people cruise around, banging models (both male and female), spending money hand-over-fist, all while whacked out on Xanax, pot, coke, and alcohol. Sure, the survival rate of a Bret Easton Ellis story is about 40%, but when you look so damn cool doing it, wouldn’t you be willing to roll the dice? Just stay away from the sleazy pimps named Rip.

The Doors

We all know how The Doors ends, because it’s a true story. Nonetheless, it’s easy to ignore that good judgment and want to dive right in to the Sunset Strip scene of the late 60’s and early 70’s with someone as charismatic as Jim Morrison, trashing hotel rooms while naked, and tripping balls every day that ends in “y.” I mean, yes, cocaine and alcohol can end your life as fast as a bullet can, but if they enable you to look awesome in leather pants, isn’t it possible that it’s worth it? Probably not, but again, this list isn’t about good judgment. It’s about writing shitty poetry while on peyote.