Review: Pineapple Express

Full disclosure: I have never smoked weed in my 26 years of life. That said, I was a little worried there would be some weed-oriented nuance in Pineapple Express I wouldn't get. Then I remembered that potheads think Scooby Doo is hilarious and my fears went away. So, I hauled my sober ass to a late night showing and enjoyed everything about the movie, except for the people with whom I was forced to see it.

The plot in 13 words:
Two stoners are on the run from a really pissed-off Gary Cole.

The chronic:
I honestly think Seth Rogen is sort of taking over the spot that Will Ferrell used to occupy as the guy who can yell non-sensical stuff and actually make you laugh. Even though he plays the straight man in this movie, his parts are still the funniest. His lines are funny. Watching him do choreographed action scenes with his baby gut is funny. Even hearing him sing along with "Electric Avenue" is funny. The only thing I don't like about the guy is that he's only three months older than I am and he's getting rich making hit movies and I sit here 12 hours a day screaming obscenities at a TV screen.

Franco:
James Franco has done a lot to make me not like his stuff. He was my least favorite character on Freaks and Geeks and I couldn't stand him in the Spiderman movies (the pie-eating scene still haunts my dreams), but I actually liked him as a friendly drug dealer. If I was ever going to buy drugs, I would hope to do it from a guy like Saul.

The worst part:
While I have mostly positive things to say about this movie, I couldn't help but be a little disappointed by Gary Cole. I didn't get what his deal was. His character just didn't seem to make any sense. I guess it didn't help that he was always on-screen with Rosie Perez. She makes me want to burn my eardrums with cross joints.

The crowd:
There are plenty of things to laugh at in this movie, but what annoyed me was the insistance some stoners have on laughing extremely hard at everything even remotely pot-related. Some guy in my theater actually yelled out, "Dude, he hit him with the bong!" We all saw that, stoney, and yes, now we all know you smoke weed. Thanks for the announcement. Now head on out to your Jetta and get the hell out of here.

Cheech and Chong
If you're thinking about comparing this to a Cheech and Chong movie, please don't. I know, it has two guys smoking weed and that's similar, but otherwise it's completely different. If you're going to compare it to another movie try using Apocalypse Now. Not because the two movies are in any way similar, but just to mess with the minds of the stoners you're probably talking to.

So, is it worth the ten bucks?
Absolutely. But if you do, don't smoke weed before you do. You'll just be fulfilling a stereotype. Maybe try some angel dust. Switch it up on them.