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Knight Rider Rescues Vanessa Williams From Terrorists

Wednesday, January 7 by

We are still in the days of TV experimentation, and tonight just may be the riskiest decision. Yep, we're watching Knight Rider, because it's been written up as being "nothing more than car-porn," or being "so delectably bad that you have to watch it just to tell your grandchildren that you were there," and because tonight's episode involves rescuing Vanessa Williams from terrorists. To cleanse the palate, VH1 is offering the 40 greatest pranks of all-time.

Review: Defiance

Wednesday, January 7 by

Defiance is an amazing story that suffers from a poor telling. It is mired in heavy handedness, never freeing itself to be anything other than a tale of revenge. With that said, there are some totally sweet battle sequences and good tough guy-ness on the part of Craig and Schreiber that make the movie a decent view.

Defiance

Wednesday, January 7 by

Three Jewish brothers escape from Nazi-occupied Poland into the Belarussian forest, where they join Russian resistance fighters and endeavor to build a village in order to protect themselves and others in danger.

7 TV Shows We Would Like To See

Wednesday, January 7 by

We here at Screenjunkies know a thing or two about the old television set. Here is one of our lists of shows that should immediately be made.1. Anaconda NannyTagline: "The life of a parent can be so constricting." Plot Synopsis: Five gigantic Amazonian snakes compete to see which one can raise a 2 year old. Which child will get into the best preschool? Which one will learn to read first? Which one will be devoured before the opening credits of the pilot?   2. Supreme CourtTagline: "Posession is 9-10ths of the game."Plot Synopsis: Esteemed members of the United States Supreme Court compete in hard core 3-on-3 elbow-throwing streetball. All fouls are voted on and require a five-ninths majority vote to be sustained.

Expendables Gets Bad-Asser With Rourke

Wednesday, January 7 by

This recent addition of Randy Couture to the cast of Expendables put the movie in the running for an Oscar in the categories of Broken Arms, One Punch Knock Outs, Roundhouses, and maybe even Spinning Pile Drivers. With Mickey Rourke joining, the film will surely be in contention for Best Comeback, Best Supporting Steroid Habit, and Creative Accomplishment in the Category of Human Growth Hormone. This movie is going to be sweet. That and more in your morning news.

EXCLUSIVE Slammin’ Salmon Trailer

Tuesday, January 6 by

Synopsis: Former heavyweight boxing champ, Cleon Salmon, is the celebrity owner of an upscale Miami restaurant. In debt to the Yakuza, the Champ “inspires” his waitstaff with a one-night-only contest: Top selling waiter gets $10,000; lowest selling waiter gets his face punched in by the Champ himself. Release date is TBD.

Tuesday Night Homeland USA TV

Tuesday, January 6 by

This an exciting time for television afficionados. Yeah you're going to have to wait another two weeks for Lost or Battlestar Gallactica, so why not dabble in some new shows, right? Come on, its the 90's! If you're not the adventurous type, theres a retrospective Star Trek 25th Anniversary followed by Shatner's Raw Nerve with special guest…Spock! Homeland Security USA 8/7c on ABC Robert Deniro,Homeland Security – Watch more Free Videos

5 Perfect Flicks for Steven Seagal

Tuesday, January 6 by

Having squared-off against Rastafarians, thugs and vampires, Steven Seagal will leave no ass unkicked. No windpipe uncrushed. No face not hit with a pool cue. Here are five potential films for the strong man to headline.

New Scenes in Japanese Watchmen Trailer

Tuesday, January 6 by

It seems like we get more Watchmen footage every week. At this rate we will have seen the entire movie by the time it's released. Which will be in 2012 because of the drag-out legal battle between studios over rights.  Why does Hollywood always insist in getting in the way of our entertainment? And here's another thing: Why do the Japanese get new scenes in their trailers? I get SO angry at Hollywood for being un American. Commies. Hollywood: I'm watching you.  

Japanese TV Is Totally Awesome

Tuesday, January 6 by

I would have a LOT of trouble competing in this event because I would just stop on the first girl and lay there. I'm saying this from experience. Man, I really miss college.

Hellboy Learns About Direct TV

Tuesday, January 6 by

I use Comcast because of the no-contracts thing, so I have no idea how direct TV works. But I like the idea of being able to use my computer to pick what I want to record. One of the biggest problems with the interface I use is that searching for shows requires entering in words one letter at a time using the remote, kind of like registering a high score in an old school arcade game. I thought this commercial was actually OK. Very subtle. The future of TV is only going to be integrating it with your computer until they are the same entity (I know, BOLD prediction). My suggestion is that Comcast implement this feature and get the Dark Knight to explain how it works.

Terminator:Salvation

Monday, January 5 by

Title: Terminator:SalvationDirector: McGCast: Christian Bale, Anton Yelchin, Sam Worthington, Moon Bloodgood, CommonSynopsis: John Connor is facing a future that's not entirely what his mother laid out as he faces the robotic hordes of Skynet.Genre: Sci-Fi & FantasyRelease Date: May 22, 2009 

American Gladiators Cancelled, But Carano May Have a New Job Soon

Monday, January 5 by

From CAGE POTATO. One of the reasons that American Gladiators tanked is that it's just not violent enough. Watching people smack each other with giant Q-Tips on a padded pedestal 7 feet above waist-deep water is just not the same as seeing Kimbo Slice get pummeled in an octagonal cage. We are Americans. We need the specter of real injury in our competition. It looks like Gina Carano, one of AG's strong/sexy women might have some employment opportunities somewhere that won't be shut down after one season. Read the full story HERE. 

My Bloody Valentine 3D

Monday, January 5 by

Title: My Bloody Valentine 3-D Director: Patrick Lussier Cast: Jensen Ackles, Jaime King, Kerr Smith, Kevin Tighe, Tom Atkins Synopsis: Ten years ago, a tragedy changed the town of Harmony forever. Tom Hanniger, an inexperienced coal miner, caused an accident in the tunnels that trapped and killed five men and sent the only survivor, Harry Warden, into a permanent coma. But Harry Warden wanted revenge. Exactly one year later, on Valentine’s Day, he woke up…and brutally murdered twenty-two people with a pickaxe before being killed. Ten years later, Tom Hanniger returns to Harmony on Valentine’s Day, still haunted by the deaths he caused. Genre: Horror Release Date: January 16, 2009

Crank 2: High Voltage

Monday, January 5 by

Chelios faces a Chinese mobster who has stolen his nearly indestructible heart and replaced it with a battery-powered ticker that requires regular jolts of electricity to keep working. Studio: LionsgateRating: n/aRelease Date: April 17th, 2009Babes to Watch For: Amy Smart

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