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ASTRO BOY TEASER (AND UM, SOME NEWS, I GUESS)

Tuesday, March 24 by

Slow news morning, it seems, so we'll supplement this post with a some Astro Boy teaser action.  Check it out after the jump.  In the meantime, here's your paltry news spread: Cameron Diaz to dance in underwear for umpteenth time in Swingles (Empire) Spock to Voice Transformers baddie "The Fallen?" (/Film) Riddick might return as early as 2010 (Dread Central) Summit finds Wolf Pack for New Moon (LatinoReview) Zac Effron reazlies he cannot fill Kevin Bacon's dancing shoes (USA Today)

24 Recap: 10pm-11pm

Monday, March 23 by

The cops are at Senator Blaine Mayer's house collecting evidence, but Moss doesn't need any evidence, he concludes that Bauer's the culprit. He calls up Ethan Kanin. "It's Sentor Mayer, he's dead.""What?!?!" Kanin replies. Kanin, flabbergasted at what has happened hangs up the phone and slumps in his chair.President Taylor calls up her husband, who is awake and seemingly doing alright. She tells him that Juma and Dubaku are dead, that everything's over, and that Olivia has joined the staff. The first man is relieved. They hang up.Kanin walks in. "He's expected to make a full recover! Maybe, just maybe this day will end on a positive note," says President Taylor.Yeah right.Kanin tells the President that Senator Mayer has been apparently slain by Bauer. President Taylor can't believe it. Then Kanin says that he has to step down because he couldn't do enough to protect the President from the shitstorm that happened only a few hours ago."I'm a liability to you now…don't let me sink your agenda.""OUR agenda, Ethan…"

Heroes Recap: Baby Sitters and Hero Killers

Monday, March 23 by

Danko receives a little present from an anonymous donor, the gift being Eric Doyle the puppet master, and Rebel is up to some more antics as his identity is revealed and Tracy has to make a choice on whether she will betray Rebel or not. Parkman has to find a way to save Daphne, and Hiro and Ando discover that baby Matt has powers. Claire is blessedly absent this episode, and we get some juicy screentime from a neglected character: Angela Petrelli. It’s a thrilling return to form for Heroes, and it’s right after the jump.

10 SEXIEST DAMSELS IN DISTRESS ON FILM

Monday, March 23 by

This Friday, John Cena's gonna be kickin' ass, takin' names, breakin' necks and maybe cashin' checks if 12 Rounds doesn't gets squashed by the competish.  Why is Mr. Cena so riled up?  Well, in 12 Rounds, he's gotta go all Wrestlemania twelve times over to get back his girlfriend, Molly Porter (Ashley Scott) from the clutches of vengeful douchebag Miles Jackson (Aidan Gillen).  Ahhh, the old Damsel in Distress blunder.  Don't these bad guys ever learn?  Nothing gets under a hero's skin worse than his leading lady getting bogarted by some goon. 

Battlestar Who? Clips From Caprica Hit the NET

Monday, March 23 by

Well, Battlestar Galactica is over and done with (read Jim Connelly's tear-jerking eulogy here), but Universal and the newly re-branded Syfy Network have already begun bombarding us with shrapnel made in Caprica.  Here's one of the clips.  Check out the other six after the jump!

SILENCE OF THE LINKS – NSFW!!!

Monday, March 23 by

Diablo Cody has a Fempire (Film Drunk) Invisible Bikes are the New Celeb Accessory (Holy Taco) 12 Video Game Characters With Undiagnosed Mental Disorders (Cracked) Spank Bank: Jewel Santini (Gorilla Mask) Original Screen Junky Judy Garland Gets Biopic (Pajiba) Lars Von Trier Serves Up Man Von Ass (The Playlist) Worst Three-quels EVER (IGN) Marvel at the SUPER CHAMELEON! (I-Am-Bored)

Colbert Beats Out Porn Star “Serenity” for Space Station Name

Monday, March 23 by

An Associated Press report unveiled but moments ago that TV's Stephen Colbert came in first in NASA's online contest to name a new room at the international space station.  The name "Colbert" beat out NASA's four suggested options in the space agency's effort to have the public help name the addition. The new room will be launched later this year.Of course, this is what happens when you let write-in votes count, especially when week after week, Colbert has proven that his viewers will do anything that he asks them to do, especially if it means getting something named after their idol.  [Colbert's 230,539 votes] clobbered Serenity, one of the NASA choices, by more than 40,000 votes. Nearly 1.2 million votes were cast by the time the contest ended Friday. I think Serenity is a totally serviceable name, and I think the Wicked Pictures star whose name all the NASA computer geeks threw into the hat would agree.In fact, this whole thing makes me long for the days when NASA just named their spacecraft after porn stars.

JENNIFER BEALS TRADES LESBIANS FOR LIES

Monday, March 23 by

According to EW's Michael Ausiello, Jennifer Beals – she of The L Word – has joined the cast of Fox's Lie to Me.  I have to admit I'm going to miss all those L Word billboards and print ads with Beals and the girls in suggestive, nude positions, one of which I've shamelessly posted after the jump.    

BLOOD: THE LAST VAMPIRE – FULL TRAILER!

Monday, March 23 by

ShockTilYouDrop has posted the full Japanese trailer for the live action version of Blood: The Last Vampire, complete with super slick camera moves, some questionable CG demons, Michael Bay-style explosions, a heartfland Japanese power ballad, and a gravelly-voiced Japanese announcer punctuating the trailer with a super Japanese-y recap of the title that sounds something like, "Last-oh Blut-oh!"Watch it in semi-glossy Flash after the jump-oh!

Monday TV Preview

Monday, March 23 by

While House takes a breather after the glorious 'killer kitty' episode, 24 is right on point with Bauer on the run from the Feds after being framed for two murders and killing the real culprit, but you know he ain't getting deterred by nothing from finding Jon Voight's Bioweapon! Also, catch some biblical bloodshed on Battles BC, a show that reenacts some excellent warrings from our bloodthirsty ancestors. Another Regis 'I'm a Robot' Philbin somehow appears on 2 Late Night shows tonight as well. Your preview after the break.

Top 10 Recyclable TV Characters

Monday, March 23 by

The average successful TV show has four or five seasons, a total of 80-90 episodes.  At 20 minutes an episode, that’s at least 1600 minutes of entertainment.  And that's not including the really popular ones like The Simpsons (20 years) or ER (15 years).  That’s a lot of airtime to fill…  So, once execs discover a certain kind of show is popular, half a dozen clones will pop up… staple characters are born… then die… then get reincarnated.  The circle of life on Television. Some of these recyclable characters have been around for ages, while others have just made their debut in the last ten years or so.  (And many of the shows below fall into several categories, but for the sake of variety once a show has appeared in a category it won’t appear again.)  So without further ado, Screen Junkies presents… TV’s Top Ten Recyclable Characters.   10. The Drama Queen Doctor

WATCHMEN’S BLACK FREIGHTER DROPS ANCHOR!

Monday, March 23 by

For those of you who watched the Watchmen and said to yourselves, "Self, this movie is missing something, and I think it's a whole other movie that could fit inside this movie," your ship has arrived.  Tales of the Black Freighter, the fictitious comic within Watchmen, has been turned into its own feature-length animated movie, and it's coming to DVD and Blu-Ray April 6th.  Empire posted an exclusive clip that contains some behind-the-scenes goodies and clips from the Freighter flick after the jump. Check it out after the jump.

SCREEN TEST: SLUMDOG MILLIONAIRE

Monday, March 23 by

Jai Ho, everybody!  Or maybe Jai Home Video is more like it! Slumdog Millionaire is coming to DVD & Blu-Ray on Tuesday, March 31st, and Screen Junkies is giving away a free copy.  The beauty part is that you don't have to crawl through a river of human excrement to get one – unlike brave little Jamal had to do just to get Bollywood superstar Amitabh Bachchan's autograph.

WHERE THE WILD THINGS POSE

Monday, March 23 by

Today's issue of USA Today includes some brand spanking new (and a couple familiar, but tweaked) photos from Spike Jonze's Where the Wild Things Are.  No answer as to whether or not Denise Richards and Neve Campbell will be making out in this version of Wild Things, but the photos are nothing short of friggin' gorgeous.  You can count me in for this one, no question.  See the rest of the photos – and the rest of the news – after the jump…

Terminator TSCC: Today Is the Day Pt 2

Sunday, March 22 by

Jessie’s mission aboard the USS Jimmy Carter in the year 2027 is compromised, which may have severe consequences if John Connor can’t be warned.  As Jessie in the future comes to learn that perhaps there is more to this war than she knows, Jessie in the present is forced to deal with the consequences of killing Connor’s girlfriend. About The FutureJohn and Derek share a somber moment.  Riley is on both of their minds.Derek breaks the silence: “I’m sorry.  She didn’t deserve what happened.”John agrees but quickly changes the subject.  “How long could you survive with Cameron if she wanted to kill you?” John inquires.“What kind of weapon do I have?” Derek asks, humoring the boy.“Fists, elbows, fingernails, teeth…”“Those aren’t weapons.”“No.”“You know the answer to that, John.  If she wants you dead, you’re dead.”John nods because Derek is speaking the truth.  He tells Derek that he wants to talk to him about the future.

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