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‘Twilight’ Star Ashley Greene Sees ‘The Apparition’

Friday, November 6 by

Twilight hottie Ashley Greene has signed on to star in The Apparition. In the supernatural thriller, Greene portrays one half of a young couple who are terrorized by an evil spirit that is unleashed after a college experiment goes awry. Typically college experimentation means turning ordinary household items into bongs and a little girl-on-girl so it should be interesting to see how either of those activities conjures a ghost. The film will be produced under Joel Silver's Dark Castle banner and is said to be based on real events. Now, is this based on true events in the bullpoop way that Milla Jovovich's The Fourth Kind is allegedly a true story? Or is it true like the time I once ate 74 King Crab legs in one sitting? Nobody believed I could do it but I proved the skeptics wrong. The truth is out there. (Empire)

‘Paranormal Goat’ Spoof Leaves Droppings on the Theater Floor

Thursday, November 5 by

Paranormal Goat – Watch more Funny Videos  Here's a new ad for The Men Who Stare At Goats that gets the goat of Paranormal Activity. See what I did there? I feel sorry for the clean up crew in that theater. We see the goats covering their eyes to shield themselves from The Clooney, but chances are they're simultaneously crapping their goat britches. Stare at this links and see if they stare back… 25 Girls Playing Football in Their Underwear (HolyTaco) Greatest Pee Wee Football Trick Play Ever (TotalProSports) Ferrari Theme Park in Dubai (TheChive) 2012 + Raising Arizona = Awesome (FilmDrunk) 15 Tastiest Foods on a Stick (SuperTremendous) Redford Gets His John Wilkes Booth (Pajiba) Kristen Stewart is a Lesbian (CelebJihad) I Miss Gene Hackman (Unreality) 10 Things Not to Say to a Female Poker Player (Asylum) Pedro Martinez Can Go Back to Being Fat (BustedCoverage) I Heart Japan Doing the Splits (RegretfulMorning) Marry a Smart Girl, Love Longer (MadeMan) Texas Crash Videos (AllLeftTurns)

‘Teen Wolf’s’ Logical Progression is…’Middle Aged Wolf’

Thursday, November 5 by

If you're anything like me you're A.) pants-sh*ttingly attractive and B.) a big fan of Teen Wolf and Teen Wolf-related humor. Despite his questionable basketball skills, there's something about the film and character that perserveres nearly twenty-five years later. But were you ever curious what became of Scott Howard? Was his experience as the Wolf enough to boost his confidence and set him on the path to an exciting life? Or did he end up just another corporate drone stamped down by the drudgery of work? Filmmaker Marc Milstein asked himself the same question and his answer, the second one.Great work from all the guys in Substitute Scientist: Michael Capes, Marc Milstein, and  Rene Gube. We look forward to the next installment of Middle Aged Wolf.

What’s On TV Tonight: Thursday, November 5th, 2009

Thursday, November 5 by

A sexy vampire, racist puppets, the Rise Of The Machines, and the Fall of Buddy Lembeck. Tonight!CHECK OUT WHAT TO WATCH AFTER THE JUMP NOTE: ALL TIMES EASTERN & PACIFIC

‘Risk’ Is Latest Board Game To Never Become A Movie

Thursday, November 5 by

The game of global domination has a new uphill battle: development hell. Sony and Overbrook Entertainment, Big Willy Smith's company, added Risk to the slew of board game big screen adaptations that are in the works. Lately Hollywood has had board game fever, buying up Candyland, Monopoly, and Battleship just to name a few. How many of these will actually become living, breathing movies? All depends on how much play money the execs are willing to deal out… According to Hasbro, Risk was the first board game to offer nonlinear movement as players compete on a map of the world by amassing armies and conquering territory. For the film, I think the nonlinear movement rule should be revoked and characters can only move in rigid, straight lines. It makes obsolutely no sense, and the battle sequences will be severly hampered by it, but damn if it won't be bloody. Personally, my bets are on Ukraine. Ukraine is not weak!  [THR]

Risk

Thursday, November 5 by

Big screen adaptation of the sprawling board game.

‘The League’ Actress Leslie Bibb

Thursday, November 5 by

 Leslie Bibb plays a b*tch well. She played a stuck up high school b*tch in Popular, an overbearing NASCAR b*tch in Talladega Nights, and now she's playing an emasculating wife b*tch in The League on FX tonight. I'm not saying she's typecast, I'm just saying she knows how to make a man thank the heavens that he's single. Oh wait, she's hot. Nevermind all that.A word from Leslie: "Jesus did grow up."Yes, into a fine young man, Leslie. That's what happens when you drink your milk.See why white gold does a body good after the jump.

Zach Galifianakis May Lend Voice To ‘Puss In Boots’

Thursday, November 5 by

The producers of Puss In Boots have reportedly called Zach Galifianakis fat in the nicest way possible. The comic has been approached to supply the voice of the rotund, apple-cheeked Humpty Dumpty in the upcoming Shrek spin-off. Of course we all remember the story of Humpty Dumpty — after finding success amongst the Chicago improvisational comedy scene, the nursery rhyme egg went on to find greater fame with a thriving television and film career. Alas, he was tragically cut down in his prime by a deadly combination of alcohol, pills, and wall-sitting. If anyone can handle this mix of comedy and drama, it's Galifianakis. (/Film)

‘Despicable Me’ Trailer Ain’t No Pixar

Thursday, November 5 by

The Despicable Me trailer looks despicable meh. It introduces us to #1 Super Villain Gru (Steve Carell) and–OH WAIT he's been bested by a Syndrome-from-The-Incredibles-esque Super Villain named Vector (Jason Segel). The two then battle wits, which seems more like an exercise in futility for Gru considering Vector has saws, sharks, lasers, missiles, and a boxing glove mechanism that targets your crotch.

Despicable Me

Thursday, November 5 by

Director: Pierre Coffin, Chris Renaud, Sergio PablosCast: Steve Carell, Jason Segel, Will Arnet, Ken Jeong, Kristen WiigSynopsis: A trio of orphan girls cause the normally deplorable Gru to rethink his plan to steal the moon.

Steve Guttenberg Is Saying Things

Thursday, November 5 by

Steve Guttenberg (or "The Gute" as he is known in classier circles) broke the news recently that Disney is interested in reuniting he and his Three Men and a Baby co-stars for Fathers Of The Bride My Three Dads Of The Bride Three Men and a Bride."Disney's developing 'Three Men and a Bride.' That's going to be a smash. A smash hit. They're bringing everybody back for that. Nobody knows about it. I'm the first to talk about it.” Yeah sure, Steve. He adds,"It's definitely time for another 'Police Academy.' And I think they could make another 'Cocoon.' They're surefire hits and I think they're good for the world. They make the world a better place and that's what it's all about." But why stop there? Think of all your films that could become successful franchises. For instance, Law & Order: Criminal Intent – The Video Game for which you did voice work deserves a sequel. And what about 2002's P.S. Your Cat Is Dead!? There's plenty of room for another go-around where a different cat is dead. Give the fans what they need, Gute. Give them what they demand. (Hollywood)

Happy 40th Birthday, Big Bird. (I Still Think You’re Weird)

Wednesday, November 4 by

You may have noticed Big Bird's junk on Google today and thought to yourself, "What in blue blazes?!! I'm writing a letter!" Well, put down that pen, nerd. Big Bird's balls are all over Google because it's his 40th birthday and he has friends in high places. Hard to believe that Big Bird is now officially middle-aged. Then again I'm not really sure what the life expectancy is for a gigantic, ambiguously gay, yellow songbird. So…. Happy Birthday you big freak! (Associated Content) Have a piece of birdseed cake and check out these links… Hot Chicks Love the Top Gun Song (HolyTaco) Tim Tebow Makes For Quite the Halloween Costume (TotalProSports) The Amazing Mambo Dancing Dog (SuperTremendous) Avatar Crew Can't Stop Congratulating Itself (FilmDrunk) The Voices in Steve Guttenberg's Head (Pajiba) Michael Jackson Pees for Children (CelebJihad) How to Make a Convincing Chewbacca Noise (Unreality) Halloween at the White House (Asylum) Stacy Keibler Back to Selling "Used" Bikinis (BustedCoverage) Reunited with Dad (RegretfulMorning) iPhone Owners Make Bad Girlfriends (MadeMan) Danica NASCAR Deal Close (AllLeftTurns) Phillies and Yankees Fans Fight (NothingToxic) Hot Bawls Gets You Amped (Atom)

What’s On TV Tonight: Wednesday, November 4th, 2009

Wednesday, November 4 by

Tonight, Robert Downey Jr. in blackface, Man Vs. Food in over his head, and Elisha Cuthbert in very little clothing. CHECK OUT WHAT TO WATCH AFTER THE JUMP NOTE: ALL TIMES EASTERN & PACIFIC

‘Pirate Radio’ Actress Talulah Riley

Wednesday, November 4 by

You may better know Talulah Riley if you live across the pond in the UK. She's been in her fair share of British television, including appearances in Doctor Who. Next year she has a role in Christopher Nolan's Inception as the credited 'Blonde.' I'm guessing she doesn't have a soliliquy. A word from Talulah: "I’m not some sort of tormented soul looking for identity in the roles I take. I became an actress because I love dressing up and playing."I've got a scene for you. Int. My Bedroom – Night. Talulah walks in wearing a pleather nurse's outfit. I wince. End scene.Show some control with these pics after the jump.

Tom Cruise Wears Angelina Jolie Mask in ‘Salt’ Teaser Trailer

Wednesday, November 4 by

Yesterday, we brought you the Salt teaser trailer in Russian, and now we bring it to you in glorious English. I think you'll find it's easier to understand, unless of course you call the Motherland home. Salt, or as it could be titled, Mission Impossible 4: The Search for Ethan Hunt's Identity (Again), stars Angelina Jolie as Evelyn Salt, a CIA officer who swore an oath to duty, honor, and country. When she is accused by a defector of being a Russian sleeper spy, Salt goes on the run to clear her name and ultimately prove she is a patriot. Seems like a great deal of work to prove you're a patriot, when all you need is one of these: Angelina Jolie and a conservative, right-wing wiener dog save the country. Talk about a box office smash hit. Check out the Salt teaser trailer after the jump!

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