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‘Dancing With The Stars’ Contestant Joanna Krupa

Wednesday, October 28 by

Who gives a twirling sh*t if Joanna Krupa can dance? I certainly don't. Hey ABC, get a pole up on that stage and watch your ratings skyrocket. Joanna is one of the sexiest woman alive, which is clearly evident by the aurora borealis of "daaaaaaaaaaaaaamn!" above. No tap shoes required.  A word from Joanna: "I get so sick of wearing lingerie for shoots that I don’t even go to Victoria’s Secret" Lingerie is overrated anyway. Nothing always works. Or bath bubbles. Personally, I prefer the Robocop brand of liquid suds.  You have ten seconds to comply with the pics after the jump.

‘Vaginal Hubris’ Music Video

Wednesday, October 28 by

The NFL. Sure, it has its merits. But up until a short while ago, it was still a passive experience. Then along comes Fantasy Football. And, lo and behold, with it came a reason to tune into every single NFL game from every week, because the outcome of every play meant – and probably still means – the possibility of whipping shit on your friend for your obvious superiority in selecting the most chemically perfect formula of football players who are clearly executing the specific plan that you personally have designed for them. It's like rocket science… but with heart and concussions.   

‘Alice In Wonderland’ Trailer 2 = Trailer 1 with Bonus Footage!

Wednesday, October 28 by

Spike TV hit us with the good stuff last on the Scream Awards, and no I'm not talking about the captivating evening of the award show itself. We get another look at basically the first trailer for Alice in Wonderland, except this time the producers threw in some extra tiny morsels to place on tip of your tongue and let melt into your bloodstream.All the classic Tim Burton elements are present, except of course for Johnny Depp who, wait a minute, is that Depp in creepy contact lenses?! Well this changes everything. Whether or not you think Alice is going to be awesome it's probably going to be awesome, and if you bet against it you will surely suffer the consequences of your friends' ridicule and swift punches to your vital organs. Hey, I don't know the content of your friends' characters.Never bet against Burton.

‘Lost’ Final Season Will Be Interrupted by Olympics

Wednesday, October 28 by

Dudes, I hate to be the bearer of bad news but the final season of Lost is going to be c-blocked by the Winter Olympics. Also your mom and I are taking things to the next level.According to Carlton Cuse, Lost will take a break after the first few episodes while NBC airs the Winter Games. The show is expected to return in March.This news comes as a total bummer but on the brightside we won't care much anymore come March. We can get through this together, you guys. (IGN)

50 Cent’s Got the ‘Before I Self Destruct’ Trailer on Lockdown

Tuesday, October 27 by

Before I Self Destruct Trailer – Watch more Funny Videos  50 Cent can now rightfully don an askew director's cap as he has just released the trailer for his directorial debut Before I Self Destruct. Curtis Jackson aka Fitty aka Mr. Ferrari also stars in the low budget flick where he shows off his acting range (For instance, in some scenes he holds a gun and in others he does not). Beyond that it just seems like inaudible mumbling. And if 50 Cent's albums are any indication, inaudible mumbling sells like hotcakes. The cops is at your Nana's house. Hide out with these links…  10 People That Will Definitely Be On Your Next Flight (HolyTaco) 20 Gruesome Sports Injuries (TotalProSports) Where The Wild Things Are Girl Revealed! (TheChive) Pulp Fiction Sound FX Mashup Is Legit (FilmDrunk) 10 Great Movies You'll Never Watch Again (Pajiba) Amy Winehouse Needs To Mind Her New Breasts (CelebJihad) 15 Zombie Road Signs (Unreality) How To Make Your Own Beer Pong Table (Asylum) Proof That MLS Fans Are Pussies (BustedCoverage) Tribute To Girls In Referee Outfits (RegretfulMorning) Is She Playing Hard To Get? (MadeMan) Win $200 In NASCAR Halloween Costume Contest (AllLeftTurns)

DANCING WITH THE STARS

Tuesday, October 27 by

Network: ABCHost: Tom BergeronSynopsis: Celebrities partner up with professional dancers and compete against each other in weekly elimination rounds to determine a winner.

Before I Self Destruct

Tuesday, October 27 by

Curtis Jackson's directorial debut. Starring Curtis Jackson.A young man tries to get rich even if that involves dyin' in the attempt.

What’s On TV Tonight: Tuesday, October 27th, 2009

Tuesday, October 27 by

Tonight Spike honors horror movies and BET honors hip-hop. Both industries famous for stabbings. CHECK OUT WHAT TO WATCH AFTER THE JUMP NOTE: ALL TIMES EASTERN & PACIFIC!!!

Will Ferrell & Mark Walhberg are ‘The Other Guys’

Tuesday, October 27 by

Will Ferrell has a new partner, and his name sounds nothing like John C. Reilly.  It sounds like Mark Wahlberg; Marky Mark if you're nasty.  And we've got proof that these two are cleaning up city scum in the new Adam McKay directed comedy The Other Guys.  Samuel L. Jackson and Dwayne "No Longer Call Me The Rock" Johnson are also partnered up in it as the guys, because you can't have the "other" without having the "the." Set in New York City, The Other Guys follows Detective Allen Gamble (Ferrell), a forensic accountant who’s more interested in paperwork than hitting the streets, and Detective Terry Hoitz (Wahlberg), who has been stuck with Allen as his partner ever since an embarrassing public incident with his quick trigger finger. Allen and Terry idolize the city’s top cops, Danson and Manzetti (Dwayne Johnson and Samuel L. Jackson), but when an opportunity arises for the Other Guys to step up, things don’t quite go as planned. I don't know about you, but I'm quite liking these pairings and contrasts.  McKay's last film Step Brothers left me wanting, and I'm hoping The Other Guys delivers on the laughs as well as the story. The Ferrell man-child is more worn out than the Farley man-child. [ScreenRant]  Check out more pics of Jackson & Johnson (not the lotion company) after the jump!

The Other Guys

Tuesday, October 27 by

Director: Adam McKayCast: Will Ferrell, Mark Wahlberg, Samuel L. Jackson, Dwayne Johnson Synopsis: Set in New York City, The Other Guys follows Detective Allen Gamble (Ferrell), a forensic accountant who’s more interested in paperwork than hitting the streets, and Detective Terry Hoitz (Wahlberg), who has been stuck with Allen as his partner ever since an embarrassing public incident with his quick trigger finger. Allen and Terry idolize the city’s top cops, Danson and Manzetti (Dwayne Johnson and Samuel L. Jackson), but when an opportunity arises for the Other Guys to step up, things don’t quite go as planned.

‘Paranormal Activity’ Spawns Porno Knock-Off

Tuesday, October 27 by

Paranormal Activity is an undoubted success. It cost $11,000 to make and has raked in over $62 million at the box office. I don't have a calculator on hand but when you do the math the profits equal a f*ckload. Of course a sequel is being talked about but more importantly the attention has warranted a pornographic knock-off. Or knockers-off, in this case:Dread Central has alerted us to Jim Wynorski's Para-Knocker's Activity. Yes, the Spielberg of Boob Cinema is taking on the ghost genre and giving it a kinky edge. Filming is slated to begin right after Halloween (presumably because Halloween props will be marked down). Look for it this Spring at the Cans Film Festival.

Find Camouflaged Matt Damon in Trailer for ‘Green Zone’

Tuesday, October 27 by

The first trailer for Paul Greengrass's political thriller Green Zone just hit the web, and boy does it look politically thrilling. The film is set in the chaotic early days of the Iraqi War when no one could be trusted and every decision could detonate unforeseen consequences. Sounds like dramatic conflict abounds! After seeing The Bourne Supremacy there's no doubt that Greengrass can shoot himself an action scene, and Damon can kick ass in said action scene. It doesn't appear that Green Zone will disappoint on these two very crucial fronts.

Green Zone

Tuesday, October 27 by

Director: Paul GreengrassCast: Matt Damon, Greg Kinnear, Amy Ryan, Jason IsaacsSynopsis: A thriller about a pair of CIA agents on the trail of certain Weapons of Mass Destruction and a foreign correspondent following their mission.

‘Castle’ Actress Stana Katic

Tuesday, October 27 by

In her latest gig, Stana Katic plays the sultry, flirtacious Detective Kate Beckett in the Castle, giving Nathan Fillion a run for his money every week. Insert your own “frisking” joke here. Watch the show and I think you'll agree that there's something about her. Her commanding presence makes you want to willingly obey. A word from Stana: "It was my first time kissing a woman and I had a great time with her."Are you planning on doing this again? When? Will it be in an open forum? Do tickets go on sale soon? Can I buy them directly through the venue because I really hate paying exorbitant service charges. Here are some more pics after the jump, free of charge!

‘Short Circuit’ Remake Via Paul Blart

Tuesday, October 27 by

When in doubt of who would be perfect to remake a classic, get the guy who directed Paul Blart: Mall Cop. Steve Carr already directed Are We Done Yet, the…

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