LATEST HEADLINES

“SAVED BY THE BELL” REUNION DISSES BELDING AND SCREECH

Wednesday, August 5 by

Dennis Haskins, better known as Mr. Belding, is upset about being left out of the Saved By The Bell reunion that People magazine recently put together. Apparently Zack and the show's other main actors would only reunite if "creepy" Belding and Screech were excluded. "I earned the right to be there. If anybody deserved to be on that cover, it was Dennis Haskins," the actor explained to the Detroit News. "I want people to know it was not my choice not to be there, because I would have been there. It hurts my feelings, but I'll live." Not cool, you guys. Belding is just as much a part of the show as the rest of you. Just because he always leers at Jessie's chest while saying with a lecherous smile, "Loved you in Showgirls," is not reason enough to freeze him out. This is just like televised high school all over again. (NY Mag)Have a gander at these morning links…Trailer for Peter Jackson's latest The Lovely Bones. (Apple) Double-threat Heath Ledger directs a Modest Mouse video. (The Playlist)Larry Fessenden visits The Orphanage. (Dread Central)Jason Segel joins The Adventurer's Handbook. (First Showing)Netflix streaming on its way to iPhone. (Cinema Blend)Check out the hotties in new Sorority Row pics. (Latino Review) Drop $40K on the Predator pool table. (Uncrate)

‘ONG BAK 2′ TEASER TRAILER

Tuesday, August 4 by

Ong Bak 2: The Beginning Trailer – Watch more Movie TrailersOh man… Tony Jaa is back, and you know this one is gonna be better than the first Ong Bak flick 'cos there are waaay more elephants this time around and they're Jaa's energy source.  (It was said he exploded three silhouetted heads in a childhood screening of Dumbo.)  The teaser does its job not giving too much in the way of story (you can check out the synopsis after the jump) but that's moot.  I'm of the mindset that the thinner the plot, the more likely Tony Jaa can use it to slice someone's scrotum off (after setting it on fire, of course).Even if you have crippling ADD, try to stay focused til the end of the trailer, where some nefarious villain type laughs heartily as if he were hearing Zack Galifianakis say "ritard" in The Hangover for the first time.Here are today's top links to make you feel all ri-tarded inside: Sophie Turner In A Smorgasbord Of Skimpy Outfits (Gorillamask)Suggestions For The New Alien Movie (Holytaco)Twilight Author Accused Of Stealing From 15 Year Old Girl… Makes Sense (Filmdrunk)55 Photos, 110 Babes, Lots Of Double Vision (Manofest)Holy Crap… 4 In 1 Game Table Is Awesome (Walyou)There's Already A Movie Trailer For The True Story Of A First Round 2009 NFL Draft Pick (Pajiba)7 Old Songs That Would Make Eminem Blush (Cracked)Apparently It's "Point Out How Awesome Betty White Is" Day On The Internet (Sickpigs)18 Things You Didn't Know About Megan Fox (Coedmagazine)Jessica Alba Is Hot Again In Swimsuits (Celebjihad)How To Get With A Hot Bartender (Mademan)Fedor Probably Won't Get Immediate Title Shot (Cagepotato)Where Are They Now?  The Cast Of Menace II Society (Unreality)Boozing On A Budget (Asylum)Bad Boy Golfer John Daly Weighs In On Health Care Issues (Bustedcoverage)Memorable Movie Dance-Offs (Uncoached)True Confessions From Online Dating Hell (Regretfulmorning)Mad Your Car Got Towed? Pay The Bill In Pennies! (Bachelorguy)ESPN's "Mort Goes To Camp" Lacks Any Football News (Moondogsports)Man In The Box: High School Reunion (Maninthebox)Billy Mays' Resurrectifier (Linkdork)10 Endangered Species That Are Way Too Ugly To Live (Atomfilms)

WHAT’S ON TONIGHT: TUESDAY, AUGUST 4th 2009

Tuesday, August 4 by

Cold sausage, bowel movements, bowling trophies, Dracula puppets, and a bikini-clad Kristen Bell. If more than one of these turns you on, you've got issues my friend. Tonight's TV preview will try not to judge you.CHECK OUT WHAT TO WATCH AFTER THE JUMPNOTE: ALL TIMES EASTERN AND PACIFIC!!!

WHAT TO WATCH ON TV

Tuesday, August 4 by

‘Weeds’ Actress Elizabeth Perkins

Tuesday, August 4 by

Weeds has a variety of incredibly attractive women on it, but in comparison to other shows, it has the milf market cornered.  Much is said about Mary-Louise Parker, but the unsung hot mom of the show is Elizabeth Perkins.  Playing Celia Hodes, she nails the "raging bitch" role down pat, almost too well.  It makes us hope her character experiences a softening-up that occurs as a result of her new relationship with an oddly juvenile co-worker, preferrably played by Tom Hanks.  That, or we could all just watch Big again.  Either way, she's still hot.A word from Elizabeth: "My sisters are very academically inclined so whenever they would fix me up, it would always be from someone in their world, people they would find attractive. When they came to the door in suits, it was over."Luckily, most of our readership don't own suits, so it seems like we have a shot!  Check out more hot photos of Elizabeth after the jump!

WHAT CELEBS COULD LEARN FROM HE-MAN

Tuesday, August 4 by

He-Man and the Masters of the Universe wasn't just an awesome platform to sell toys. It was also a program that delivered good moral values to its young viewers, especially at the end of each episode (not unlike G.I. Joe).
Our scientists scoured the 'nets and assembled a collection of some of these lessons taught to us by He-Man and fellow Eternians… and then we thought about all the celebrities that could stand to learn from them.
Check out these lessons below. You might just learn something, too.

“G.I. JOE” MARKETS TO THE RED STATES

Tuesday, August 4 by

Paramount must realize the colossal turkey they have on their hands with G.I. Joe because now they're trying a new marketing approach… targeting dummies. A few weeks ago they directed their efforts on the Jersey Shore , now the LA Times is reporting that the advertising is focusing heavily on mid-America. The film is apparently embedded in the Kid Rock concert tour and advertising on giant screens in the Mall Of America. The message of this campaign being, it is your patriotic duty to see this movie. All right, fine. I love my country so I'll see this movie. Even though the post-traumatic stress will probably leave me a shell of my former self. Do your part and click on these morning links… Sacha Baron Cohen will create a new character. (The Sun)Sam Worthington replaces Tom Cruise in The Tourist. (The Playlist)Patricia Arquette spends a night with The Living Dead. (Dread Central)The Stallone Sequel Spree continues with Cliffhanger. (/Film) In defense of Funny People. (Cinema Blend)

FIRST LOOK: FOUR CLIPS FROM ‘KICK-ASS’

Monday, August 3 by

CLIPS REMOVED BY REQUEST OF LIONSGATE Well, seems like someone managed to sneak a camera into Hall H at Comic-con and snag all the clips from Matthew Vaughn and Mark Millar's KICK-ASS presentation.  But something tells me the filmmakers of this as-yet-unsold flick aren't gonna mind too much.  Not only do they need more hype, but the above clip – and the rest, which you can see after the jump – are about as high quality as the bootleg DVDs my mom used to get me from Shanghai.  So you're not gonna learn too much.  To give you some perspective, the knock-offs looked like the DP replaced the camera lens with an empty Vaseline jar, and the subtitles read as if written by a schizophrenic (case in point: the Green Goblin in SPIDER-MAN was referred to as the "Gublin" and the "Green Lady.") But hey, I still got the gist, and you will too with these promising – I think – first looks. [ via Twitch] Cup your ears to your speakers and squint through the other three clips after the jump (the kind that doesn't end in death through a car roof).  But before you do, enjoy these kick-ass links: Destiny Daniels Has An Interesting Array Of Almost No Clothing (Gorillamask) What Your Employee Badge Really Says About You (Holytaco) Michel Gondry Draws A Tranny For Filmdrunk (Filmdrunk) 10 Embarassing Moments Of White People Dancing (Manofest) Turn Your Shower Into A Rave With LED Shower Lights (Walyou) A Quiz On The Most Obscure Actors Of Recent Times (Pajiba) 7 Terrifying Giant Versions Of Disgusting Creatures (Cracked) A Scandalous Sex Tape From The Video Game World (Sickpigs) Trampolines+Basketball Hoops=Awesome (Coedmagazine) Jon Minus Kate Plus Skank (Celebjihad) 7 Novel Ideas For Theme Parties (Mademan) Fedor Signs With Strikeforce (Cagepotato) 15 Examples Of What People Really Think About TV Shows (Unreality) Should NFL Teams Have Jersey Ads? (Asylum) Matt Stafford's Girlfriend Got Implants? (Bustedcoverage) 15 Really Weird Hotel Rooms (Uncoached) Plus-Sized Fashion Failures (Regretfulmorning) Mad Men Yourself (Bachelorguy) Daily Kos Writer Thinks Forbes Disliked Athlete List Is Racist (Moondogsports) Two-Headed Calf Looks Like Something Out Of Guillermo Del Toro's Nighmare Journal (Nothingtoxic)

WHAT’S ON TONIGHT: MONDAY, AUGUST 3rd 2009

Monday, August 3 by

The pursuit of a dream, the pursuit of kidnappers, the pursuit of revenge, the pursuit for manhood, and the pursuit for a cure. Tonight's television preview has got some tired-ass legs.CHECK OUT WHAT TO WATCH AFTER THE JUMPNOTE: ALL TIMES EASTERN AND PACIFIC!!!

‘G.I. JOE: RISE OF COBRA’ ACTRESS KAROLINA KURKOVA

Monday, August 3 by

Unlike Michael Bay, who hires models for every non-matronly female part in his films, Stephen Somers only hires models to play models in his upcoming G.I. Joe: Rise of Cobra.  The drop-dead gorgeous Karolina Kurkova will be playing the aptly nicknamed "Cover Girl," a former professional model who decided that runways and eating disorders were boring, and that blowing sh*t up in the army would be much more au courant.  A word from Karolina: "Mother Nature made me the way I am, and I should be happy."Most men would high five Mother Nature's palms red for creating Karolina. Check out the photos of Karolina after the jump and turn your palms red! From all the clapping, of course. 

REVIEW: (500) DAYS OF SUMMER

Monday, August 3 by

It’s been several days now, and I can’t quite get this movie out of my head.  (500) DAYS OF SUMMER is one of those rare films that actually speaks to…

SPIELBERG TO REMAKE “HARVEY”

Monday, August 3 by

Although his name has been attached to a slew of projects recently, Steven Spielberg has set his sights on Harvey as his next to direct. James Stewart starred in the original as a man who's best friend is a six-foot tall invisible rabbit. No word yet on casting or the unnecessary special effects that will bastardize this remake but let's see, who in Hollywood could pull off a protagonist who sees things that may or may not be there? Joaquin Pheonix, put down your microphone and dookie gold ropes. Steven Spielberg needs you. (The Playlist) Check out these other morning links… Dispute settled. Futurama cast returns. (/Film) Tom Arnold is full of sh*t. (MTV) What Michael Moore really wants to do is direct. (First Showing) Mary-Ann from True Blood. What up with her? (TV Squad) Rob Marshall is going to make Pirates 4 faaabbbbuuullllooouuussss! (Empire)

THE COEN BROTHERS ARE BACK WITH THE MOST JEWISH MOVIE OF THE YEAR

Friday, July 31 by

  A Serious Man (2009) – Official Trailer #1 [HD] – Watch more Funny VideosJoel and Ethan Coen are back with A Serious Man. The film centers on a Jewish professor who seeks stability in his unraveling life. Known for their creative casting choices, the Coen Brothers have populated this cast with mostly unknowns. Apart from Adam Arkin and Richard Kind, I'm not really familiar with the cast (though the secretary did sound like Tony Todd.) If history serves I'm sure that this will be a great launching pad for the lead actor Michael Stuhlbarg. Why, that's practically a household name already. Just rolls off the tongue. Stretch it out, Stuuuhhhhhllllllbbbbbbbbaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrgggggggggggggggggggg….Find your place in life via these links…Alyssa Frangedakis Is Very Attractive (Gorillamask) 8 Things That Will Definitely Happen At Summercamp (Holytaco) Ridley Scott To Direct Alien Prequel (Filmdrunk) Drunks And Live Newscasts Mixed Together=Hilarious (Manofest) Pop Tart iPhone Sleeve Makes Your Phone Delicious (Walyou) A Review Of Televised Golf (Pajiba) The 6 Most Badass Murder Weapons In The Animal Kingdom (Cracked) Stephen Colbert Circa 1995 (Coedmagazine) Booty-Off: J-Lo Vs. Kim Kardashian (Celebjihad) 8 Things You Didn't Know You Could Fry (Mademan) Jerry Millen Spouts Off Terrible Analogies (Cagepotato) 7 Notable Celebrity Comebacks (Unreality) Who Should Replace Megan Fox On A Day Without Megan Fox? (Asylum) Ex-HS Teacher Did Not Have Sex With Football Star (Bustedcoverage) The 10 Best Seinfeld Characters Who You Never Saw (Uncoached) Obama Hosts A Beer Summit (Regretfulmorning) Furniture Made From Old Barrels Of Whisky: Manliest Thing Ever? (Bachelorguy) Kanye Declares Himself New King Of Pop, Acts Like Douche (Moondogsports) Jerk Roommate Launches Tomato Into Man's Testicles (Nothingtoxic) A Reminder To Never Mix Pop Rocks And Soda (Atomfilms) Banderas And Neeson Square Off In The Other Man (Filmofilia)

WHAT’S ON THIS WEEKEND? JULY 31st – AUGUST 2nd

Friday, July 31 by

Gang violence, angry Japanese people, a mentally unstable comedian, pugilism, alternative jams, and Dawson. This weekend's television preview is as schizo as Dave Chappelle.CHECK OUT WHAT TO WATCH AFTER THE JUMPNOTE: ALL TIMES EASTERN AND PACIFIC

‘THIRST’ ACTRESS OK-VIN KIM

Friday, July 31 by

 I'm as sick of the vampire craze as you (meaning to say I'm sick of Twilight and True Blood), but the new film from the badass Chan-wook Park, Thirst, intrigues the crap out of me.  The film centers around a failed experiment that turns a devoted priest into a vampire, who has to battle to retain his humanity.  Further confusing his situation is the beautiful Ok-vin Kim, who plays a woman in dire need of the priest's help.  So now the priest has vampire problems and a beautiful woman challenging his whole celibacy deal.  Outside of the flick, Kim is a young actress and model with a small list of credits so far.  She also happens to know kung fu, which is always pretty awesome.A word from Ok-vin Kim: "I am not attracted to easy and simple roles… I only feel alive when I am challenged with difficult roles that push me to improve my acting skills"Well, we're attracted to the fact that you aren't attracted to easy and simple roles.  Check out more hot photos of Ok-vin Kim after the jump!

MORE