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‘Dexter’ Season Five Killer Details

Friday, March 5 by

The season four finale of Dexter knocked the wind out of us and made me want to punch John Lithgow (something I swore I'd never do). Though it also served to reinvigorate a slumping storyline. So we were more than eager to chat with executive producer Sara Colleton when we caught up with her on the red carpet at PaleyFest 2010. If you're not caught up on the series, stop reading now as there are SPOILERS AHEAD. Here's what she told us we can expect in the new season.Dexter's not really one to wear his heart on his sleeve. What can we expect as he learns how to grieve?He is going to have to deal with a lot of feelings that he's never felt before, so it'll be interesting. He's going to approach it all, we hope, in a way that is unique and feels authentic to the audience. You'll see him go through all of those things and it will be different. I don't want to telegraph exactly what we're going to do because we want to present what anyone would be going through in that situation in a very unique Dexter-like way.SEE WHAT ELSE COLLETON HAD TO SAY, INCLUDING NEWS ABOUT THE SEASON'S BIG BAD, AFTER THE JUMP…

Christopher Lee is a Rock God

Thursday, March 4 by

This album promo will melt both your face and assumption that Christopher Lee is of sound mind.  Lee tells the tale of Charlemagne, the first Holy Roman Emperor, via maximum wailage. His album, "Charlemagne: By the Sword and the Cross" is available now.Bang your head to these links. The Language of Johnny Depp (Moviefone)Attractive Women Cause Injuries (Asylum)Heidi Montag's Plastic Surgeon Has Cut Her Off (PopEater)25 Well-Trimmed Bushes (HolyTaco)Al Pacino is a Creepy Old Perv (FilmDrunk)Steve Nash Wants You To Stay Vitaminized (TotalProSports)Memorable Knife-Wielders from Movies (Unreality)Foxiest Fairy Tale Ladies (Maxim)Taylor Swift Sex Toy Controversy (CelebJihad)Naked Chuck Liddell is in Good Company (CagePotato)15 Best Heist Films (Pajiba)If Memes Had Big Budget Campaigns (Atom)Clubs Hate Jersey Shore (MadeMan)Jimmie Johnson Car Fails (AllLeftTurns)25 Funny Reaction Faces (RegretfulMorning)

‘Survival of the Dead’ Red Band Teaser Has Hot Dogs

Thursday, March 4 by

Zombies getting killed by hot dogs now? The walking dead are getting weak as sh*t. Next thing you know our pees-pees will do the trick, they'll be an outbreak of zombie murder-rape, and then legal types will start talking about "equal rights." It's never worked before and it certainly won't work after an apocalypse.On that note, the red band teaser for George Romero's Survival of the Dead hit the Internetz today. What are the zombies doing in this one, you ask? On an island off the coast of North America, local residents simultaneously fight a zombie epidemic while hoping for a cure to return their un-dead relatives back to their human state. Amazing! How do they keep breathing new life into this dead concept?! Hey, if you don't like my schtick my mom will reimburse you. Salivate at the sight of the red band trailer after the jump.

Blake Lively (and ‘Green Lantern’) in Penis-Swelling 3D

Thursday, March 4 by

fap fap fap fap fapWhat a week it's turning out to be for men attracted to holograms.  On Monday came news that Amber Heard would be popping out above moviegoers when Drive Angry hits the screen in 3D, and today we got the word that the Warner Brosefs will present Martin Campbell's Green Lantern stereoscopically. That means we'll all be one step closer to the highly-desired Blake Lively motorboat. The science is almost there!!Though filming has yet to begin, it's unknown whether or not the production will shoot with 3D-outfitted cameras or if that look will be added in post. What I do know is if this trend persists, masturbation in the future will be bad for your eyes for two reasons. (Box Office Mojo)

James Cameron: I Am a Fan of Jokes

Thursday, March 4 by

He's oozing sense of humor. James Cameron has weighed in on the decision to cancel a Sacha Baron Cohen Avatar skit from Sunday's Oscars in order to spare the director's feelings. He tells E!:"I don't know anything about that … I don't produce the Oscars. If they want to poke fun at 'Avatar' Sunday, that's okay by me." Show co-producer Bill Mechanic denies the allegations and comments:"It was a little too MTV for everyone."Oh right. This year's Oscars are about respect and gravitas and not fun party vibes. I forgot about that. I guess that means awards DJ Joel Madden won't be playing Diddy's "I'll Be Missing You" over the celebrity death montage. (Vulture) 

‘Brooklyn’s Finest’ Actress Shannon Kane

Thursday, March 4 by

Shannon Kane is best known for playing Natalia Fowler on the soap All My Children. If you don't watch daytime television because you're too busy contributing to society or looking for a job (touching yourself), then you're probably not aware of her. Look, ain't she pretty?!   A word from Shannon: "I'm currently in flirtation with fellow rookie cop, Brot." Lalala, I can't hear you! I'm too busy working for a living! Shut up, it IS work! Don't drown out the pics after the jump.

‘Legend of the Guardians’ Has Some Nice-Looking Owls

Thursday, March 4 by

Rejected early concept art.It's refreshing to see an animated film about anthropomorphic animals where poop-eating is not involved. Though this one may contain vomiting up mouse skeletons, which you gotta admit is pretty metal (poop-eating is more GG Allin).USA Today has pics from Zack Snyder's Legend of the Guardians, based on the children's book series The Guardians of Ga'Hoole, before the trailer premieres in front of Alice in Wonderland. The film is based on the first three installments of the book series: The Capture, The Journey, and The Rescue. The story follows a young barn owl who is captured and brainwashed to fight in the ongoing owl war that you probably didn't know about. He escapes along with other kidnapped owlets, and heads to the island of Ga’Hoole, to assist its noble, wise owls in fighting the army being created by the wicked rulers of St. Aggie’s. The producers describe the film as being more Harry Potter than Happy Feet. Which is why the voice cast features smart-sounding foreign people as opposed to actors from the Apatow camp. Which really is an outrage. Jonah Hill has a bacon habit to support. (USA Today)CHECK OUT HOW THE DESIGN HAS EVOLVED AFTER THE JUMP…

wax-jolie-pitt

25 Creepy Celebrity Wax Sculptures

Thursday, March 4 by

Melt down these false idols! Every last one of 'em!

Neil Patrick Harris Wins Highly-Coveted Role in ‘Smurfs’

Thursday, March 4 by

The long-gestating Smurfs film project is gaining traction now that the animation tests are finished. Popular song and dance man, Neil Patrick Harris has been cast in an unspecified live-action role in the upcoming film. Thus he joins the illustrious ranks of Jason Lee, Breckin Meyer, Matthew Lillard, and Jerry O'Connell before him.The openly gay star is beloved for his talented turns in How I Met Your Mother, Dr. Horrible's Sing-Along Blog, Doogie Howser M.D., the Harold and Kumar films and as host of the Emmys. Though it is unclear whether he will play a human who encounters the Smurfs or the fugly wizard Gargamel, I'm sure he will ably class up this project.Going forward all Richard Gere/Gerbil jokes should be replaced with NPH/Smurf jokes. Homophobes everywhere, please update your dogmatic joke books accordingly. (Deadline Hollywood)

Hurley from ‘Lost’ Parties Miley-Cyrus-style

Wednesday, March 3 by

It's kind of disconcerting how well the "Party in the U.S.A." lyrics go with randomly edited together Lost footage of Hurley acting retarded.Nod your head like yeah to these links.The Language of Johnny Depp (Moviefone)Creepy Sexual Ritual Available on Craigslist (Asylum)25 Uses for Old Beer Cans (HolyTaco)Mo'nique's Huband Likes His Women Hairy (FilmDrunk)25 Hot Ski Bunnies (TotalProSports)Best NES Super Mario Brothers Mashups (Unreality)21 Awesome Ice Sculptures (Maxim)The Jonas Brothers Molest a Fat Man (CelebJihad)Tom Lawlor's Hulkster-Themed T-Shirt (CagePotato)Neil Patrick Harris Playing With Smurfs (Pajiba)Obamourage: We Are The World Edition (Atom)Things You Do Better With A Drink (MadeMan)Danica Patrick Fail (AllLeftTurns)

Stephen Lang Considering ‘Conan’ Villian Role

Wednesday, March 3 by

"i'm a real tyrant without my morning cup of joe."After his breakthough as a scarred-up badass in Avatar, Stephen Lang is carving his niche as Hollywood's go-to son of a bitch. Colonel Quaritch has been offered the role of head bad guy in Marcus Nispel's Conan remake. The character, Khalar Singh, is a cruel warlord and former comrade to Conan's miniature dog-loving dad.This sounds like an exciting bit of casting in an otherwise unexciting film. Although it could be dangerous to the plot as I'll probably root for Lang over Jason Momoa. But only because I'll always root against white guys with dreads. Just make my coffee, Smelly.Lang was terrific in Avatar and I'm glad that's leading to more work. And before you rush to comment that he's essentially playing the same role, allow me to point out that this time he'll have a sword. It's a subtle difference. (Latino Review)

‘Space Invaders’ Is Now a Movie

Wednesday, March 3 by

Video game movies are relatively cheap to make and they come with a built-in fanbase. Also, Milla Jovovich needs the work. I understand that logic. But there are some games that really do not deserve the Hollywood treatment yet they get picked up anyway. Missile Command is one. Asteroids is another. And now Space Invaders is joining the club. From the LA Times:Warner Bros. is negotiating to acquire feature rights to the landmark shooter from Taito, the Japanese company that originally manufactured the game. If the rights issues all work out, the project would bring on Hollywood fixtures Mark Gordon, Jason Blum and Guymon Casady as producers.I'm excited for the day when I don't have to be negative about movie news. A day when the ideas that are presented are original, cool film ideas. But that day is not today. I'm not saying that I'm immune to making bad decisions. For instance, me creating a ketchup and Honeycomb cereal sandwich didn't turn out so well. But I learned a valuable lesson. Also, burned my penis pretty badly on the panini press in doing so. (LA Times)

Liam Neeson Jonesing For Dead Christina Ricci in ‘After.Life’ Trailer

Wednesday, March 3 by

No one makes pale dead skin work quite like Christina Ricci. Then pop a red dress on her and you've got yourself a corpse not even Liam Neeson can resist. In After.Life, the Kraken-owning Neeson plays a mortician who communicates with the dead to help them transition to…wait for it…the afterlife. Justin Long is also running around like he usually does trying to figure out what's going on and how he can stop it with a few well-placed quips. Is she dead? Is she alive? Who sees her? Who doesn't? Why isn't Haley Joel Osment in anything anymore? Is it because puberty messed his face up? All of the answers in the After.Life trailer after the jump.

After.Life

Wednesday, March 3 by

Director: Agnieszka Wojtowicz-VoslooCast: Christina Ricci, Liam Neeson, Justin LongSynopsis: A young woman caught between life and death… and a funeral director who appears to have the gift of transitioning the dead, but might just be intent on burying her alive.

‘Scrubs’ Actress Nicky Whelan

Wednesday, March 3 by

Nicky Whelan is an Australian-born actress/goddess. What do they put in the water over in Australia? All of their hot, talented natives are taking over Hollywood, and rightly so. Isn't that supposed to be an island full of convicts? If so, I'd gladly swing on down and drop the soap in the shower. A word from Nicky: "I'm a good girl when I'm at work."Well work's only nine hours of the day, yaknowwhatI'msayin'?More pics of Nicky being bad after the jump.

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