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10 Movies That Make Real Men Cry

Tuesday, May 25 by

Real men shouldn’t cry during movies…or ever. And if they do, they’re not likely to air it out in the open. In the few instances that they do, the tears are induced by one of three things: sports, a best friend, or a love for their country. The following are movies dealing with a few such themes that have a tendency to make real men lose it: BRIAN'S SONG

Brendan Fraser Won’t Take Another ‘Journey To The Center Of The Earth’

Tuesday, May 25 by

Brendan Fraser's spelunking days may be behind him. Deadline reports that a Journey To The Center Of The Earth 3D sequel is moving forward without Fraser. Josh Hutcherson, his co-star from the original, will be taking over the lead.Fraser reportedly dropped out of the project when his top choice to direct, Eric Brevig, was passed over after he couldn't free up his Yogi Bear schedule. New Line and Walden Media got antsy, and brought in Brad Peyton, the director of Cats & Dogs: The Revenge of Kitty Galore. And with that Brendan Fraser was out. For years we've wondered if the man who appeared in Furry Vengeance, GI Joe, Tomb of the Dragon Emperor, Bedazzled, Dudley Do-Right, Monkeybone, and various Pauly Shore movies had a line. Apparently that line is Cats & Dogs. Reading between the lines, Fraser obviously doesn't believe a gay actor is capable of playing a talking cat. Cue the outrage!

Quentin Tarantino Scouting Locations for Vampire Film?

Tuesday, May 25 by

Is Quentin Tarantino scouting Eastern European locations for a possible vampire film? If unsubstantiated stories running in two different Romanian tabloids are to be believed (which they almost certainly should be), then the answer is a resounding "yes."According to Dread Central, said tabloids are reporting that Tarantino will soon be in Vienna, a gateway to Eastern European travel, in order to inspect various castles for use in a Dracula project. Again, this is little more than a rumor, and Tarantino could be visiting as nothing more than a tourist, or perhaps even a sex tourist. Who's to say? But given that it's 3:00 AM, and I have one last article to publish before I can go to bed, I choose to believe that this story has legs.

Dominic Cooper to Play Iron Man’s Dad in ‘Captain America’

Tuesday, May 25 by

First Showing is reporting that Dominic Cooper has has been brought on to play Howard Stark, the father of Tony Stark (a.k.a. Iron Man) in the upcoming film, Captain America: The First Avenger. Cooper will play a much younger version of the character than was briefly seen in Iron Man 1 and 2.According to my vast knowledge base of comic related information (a.k.a. wikipedia), Howard Stark is a millionaire inventor and the founder of Stark Industries, a weapons company that came to prominence during World War II. Like his son Tony, Howard is a brilliant but flawed character who battles with alcoholism.The character of Howard Stark is supposedly based on eccentric aviation pioneer Howard Hughes. I'm assuming that Cooper has already begun hording jars of his own precious urine in order to get into character.

‘The Human Centipede’ 80′s Style Arcade Game

Monday, May 24 by

What could be more fun than a movie about a mad doctor surgically attaching people, anus-to-mouth, in a sadistic human daisy chain? Absolutely nothing! But one thing comes close.Behold, The Human Centipede 80's style arcade game from I-Mockery! It's all the fun of the ATM masterpiece merged with the Atari classic, Centipede.Your goal is to shoot all the revolting human centipedes before they reach you, but watch out for cops! The law doesn't take kindly to improvised surgical experimentation. Fascists. (MovieLine)Play The Human Centipede 80's style arcade game after the jump.

Watch as J.J. Abrams Claims ‘LOST’ Doesn’t Have to Do With Purgatory

Monday, May 24 by

Back in 2005, at a Paleyfest panel, J.J. Abrams answered a question about "LOST" and it's affiliation with purgatory. His answer might surprise you if you take issue with liars. (Vulture)These links don't break promises.Kimmel's 'LOST' Alternate Endings (TVSquad)Teen Wolf Packs Are Taking Over High Schools (Asylum)Say Goodbye to the Cougar Trend (PopEater)25 Hot Arizona Girls (HolyTaco)Captain America Has a Burrito In His Pants (FilmDrunk)Russian Mario Propaganda (Unreality)Emma the Nude Amish Model (BroBible)Ultimate College Movie Frat House (Maxim)ESPN's Michelle Beadle Enjoys Her Hot Dog (TotalProSports)A Day in the Life of Todd Duffee (CagePotato)Jennifer Aniston Shows Off Her Bikini Body (CelebJihad)17 Very Scary Signs (Smosh)The Science of Sex (Pajiba)The Invisible Man (Atom)Eat Healthy With Burgers & Beer (MadeMan)

Old Men Will Box in ‘Grudge Match’

Monday, May 24 by

Warner Bros. has touched gloves with Tim Kelleher, picking up his pitch Grudge Match. Hey THR, bring that beat in:"Grudge," which seeks to evoke the tone of the 2000 Warners movie "Space Cowboys," revolves around retired boxers Billy "The Kid" McGuigan and Henry "Razor" Sharp, lifelong bitter rivals who are coaxed out of retirement and into the ring for one final grudge match — 50 years after their last title fight. Buuuuuuh? In an economy where studio execs are spitting in the faces of writers who act out elaborate pitches for high concept, commercial movies, Warner Bros. has gone ahead and scooped up Space Cowboys with boxers? Someone's something is in someone elses mouth. The icing on the cake is Kelleher has written for "In Living Color," "The Arsenio Hall Show," and the 1996 Sinbad classic First Kid. He wrote a Sinbad movie 14 years ago and he just sold a pitch to a real studio about elderly man scuffles! Looks like I'm putting my sci-fi epic in a drawer and going back to my passion project Incontinence Lullaby.

‘Twilight’ Spoof Movie Gets Release Date. What Took So Long?

Monday, May 24 by

Jason Friedberg and Aaron Seltzer have been strangely silent on the topic of Twilight. I'd have thought we'd see Kim Kardashian mumbling about how important her virginity is to her by now (between giggles of course), but oddly this has not happened. Wait a tick!It's just been announced that Untitled Vampire Spoof Movie has been given an August 18th release date. That's a pretty fast turnaround. Hopefully, the film will have the nuance we've come to expect from the makers of Disaster Movie, Date Movie, Epic Movie, and Meet the Spartans. Or at the very least, Judah Friedlander taking his shirt off and morphing into a wolf that pees on people and things. (JoBlo)

Martin Scorsese Wants Pacino and De Niro For ‘Sinatra’ Biopic

Monday, May 24 by

Frank needed a piece of everything.It looks like Martin Scorsese could finally tap into the lucrative Really Old Italian demographic. While doing press rounds in India for Shutter Island, he discussed his long in the works Sinatra biopic, and mentioned some casting choices that would surely give sections of Brooklyn the Italian version of a nerd boner. The legendary director had this to say in unintelligible, staccato bursts:“I've had it in mind for a long time. Even the initial script is ready. I'm yet to spot the actor who can bring back Frank Sinatra alive on screen. My choice is Al Pacino, and Robert De Niro as Dean Martin.”Why stop there? Scorsese should go full-Italian by casting Joe Pesci as Joey Bishop, and have pizza dough inexplicably land on characters heads at random. (The Hindu)

Sony Moving Ahead With ‘Hitman 2′

Monday, May 24 by

Showcasing Olga Kurlylenko's maybe-penis on its poster helped Hitman earn a $70 million profit, so it's no surprise that Sony wants to make another one. The studio is eyeballing Spanish director Daniel Benmayor to helm but there's no word if Timothy Olyphant will be returning. Though they do have an option on him should they decide to hold him down and shave his head again.Benmayor's claim to fame so far is the feature Paintball, a movie about weekend warriors who discover someone is using live ammo in their paintball game. Sounds like the second act of Child's Play 3 before they randomly end up at that carnival. Chucky should really try to avoid places where there's the possibility of falling into a giant fan. Yeah. But anyway, Hitman 2. (Deadline)

‘Sex and the City 2′ Actress Kristin Davis

Monday, May 24 by

Kristin Davis plays the prudish Charlotte in Sex and the City 2. In real life, she's a recovering alcoholic and has an alleged sex tape where she orally pleasures her boyfriend. So basically life doesn't imitate art. A word from Kristin: "I'm a hard-core Prada addict. I can't think of a time I've entered a Prada store and not bought something."Same goes for me, except the Prada store is a Taco Bell. I keep my belongings in a Gordita like it's a wallet.More pics of not so prudish Kristin after the jump.

‘Jackie Brown’ Prequel in the Works Without Tarantino

Monday, May 24 by

The prequel should be an adaptation of this image.A prequel of Jackie Brown has been written based off the novel The Switch by Elmore Leonard, which is a prequel to his novel Rum Punch, the book Quentin Tarantino read and then disregarded when making Jackie Brown. Tarantino has given his blessing on The Switch, but is not involved, so that means the source material probably won't get completely bitch-slapped. Dan Schechter wrote the screenplay and the search for a director and cast is about to begin.  Jackie Brown characters Ordell Robbie (Samuel L. Jackson) and Louis Gara (Robert De Niro) originated from The Switch, but Tarantino decided to focus on sassy Jackie and Motown music when he made his film. The prequel will follow young Ordell and Louis who, after hitting it off in prison, decide to kidnap the wife of a wealthy land developer and hold her for ransom. The twist? He doesn't want his wife back! This mashup of Overboard and Ernest Goes to Camp through the adapted eyes of Elmore Leonard is sure to be a… Nope, that word doesn't exist. (JoBlo)

‘LOST’ Cast on Kimmel

Monday, May 24 by

So "LOST" ended last night whether you wanted it to or not. I'm still turning the finale over in my head, and I know that some fans are downright pissed. I won't go so far as to say they feel betrayed, but I passed a business man on the street today pretending to stab a dagger with the word LOST on the handle into his heart. 
The cast stopped by "Jimmy Kimmel Live" last night to say aloha to a show you might still be saying WTF to. The audience asked some questions and the cast gave some answers. Be warned, it's nothing mind blowing, or even satisfying. But if you like to giggle in a carefree manner, give the clips a whirl.
Check out Jimmy interviewing Matthew Fox and the audience "grilling" the cast below.

Orlando Bloom Dons Floppy Hat For ‘Three Musketeers’

Monday, May 24 by

  Orlando Bloom won't be shaving that weird facial hair anytime soon. The Elizabethtown actor has been cast as the Duke of Buckingham in Paul W.S. Anderson's The Three Musketeers. British comedian James Corden will also join the cast as the servant Planchet. Previously cast are Christoph Waltz, Logan Lerman, Matthew MacFadyen, Ray Stevenson, Luke Evans, Mads Mikkelsen, and, of course, Anderson's wife/zombie slayer Milla Jovovich. Considering Anderson's film resume of mostly videogame adaptations, I'm really impressed by these casting announcements. It looks like this 3D take on the classic is picking up a lot of talented actors. And Milla Jovovich. (Variety)

‘Sex and the City 2′: A Barren Desert of Comedy*

Monday, May 24 by

Cancel the close-ups. Let's stick to the wide-angle shots.Sex in the City 2 may have many faults, but thematically speaking, the film is on point. According to an early review by Variety, the film is barren in almost every sense of the word. Overstaying its welcome at nearly 2 1/2 hours…part of the action occurs in the desert, which inadvertently proves apt, since the oases of enjoyable moments — and they do exist — suffer from being spaced too widely in what's otherwise a long, arid trek. Let me get this straight: the film is a comedy devoid of "enjoyable moments" (i.e. laughs) involving four women who are too old to procreate as they look for sex in a barren desert. A film can't have that many ironic overtones by accident. Perhaps my court-appointed therapist was right, and my contempt for this franchise and its fan base stems from a deep-seated misogyny rather than any legitimate problems with the writing, acting, directing and marketing involved with these awful films. Eh, what the hell does she know? Am I right, fellas? (Variety) *Note: My original title for this piece was Sex and the City 2: The Adventures of Barren Von Muffhausen.

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