‘Jersey Shore’ Cast Member Dabbling in Cocaine

Tuesday, June 1 by

Pauly D. looks as sober as a judge.BREAKING NEWS: Someone from the "Jersey Shore" cast is hitting the booger sugar. Radar is reporting that while filming the second season of the juiced, tanned, and greased show in Miami, one of the gang played in the snow. The identity of the culprit is being kept under wraps, but police are utilizing the tried and tested method of throwing rocks on South Beach and trying not to hit a cokehead. It's a numbers game at this point.“Miami is obviously a big drug city,” one source told, “and when this cast member want (sic) to score, it wasn’t hard.”Narc! Narc!“Finding someone to buy drugs from in South Beach is as easy as asking for it,” the source said. “It’s not hard and everyone is discreet.”Another Narc!“A connection was made and that’s all it took,” the source told “A lot of things were done in code. Other people knew about it but no one ratted out this person.”I don't know about you guys, but I've had enough of these accusations. I'm going to go mow my mother's lawn. **Walk-runs into bathroom to flush stash**

McG To Produce ‘The DUFF’

Tuesday, June 1 by

Breast-lover McG has picked up the rights to produce an adaptation of Kody Keplinger's teen novel The DUFF, under his Wonderland Sound and Vision banner, the shingle responsible for "Chuck," "Supernatural," and "Human Target." For those not fluent in mean-spirited teenager, DUFF stands for "designated ugly fat friend." Or in McG's case, Brett Ratner.The DUFF tells the story of an unpopular girl who falls into the arms of the popular boy she believes she hates. Before everyone gets grossed out at the thought of an ugly person finding love and happiness, bear in mind that this will be a feature film so the lead will merely be "Hollywood ugly." Which means Miranda Cosgrove with braces or glasses or… [shudder] both. (Variety)

8 Disturbingly Sexual Movie Creatures

Tuesday, June 1 by

With the release of Splice this Friday and the introduction of the film’s monster Dren, played by model and actress Delphine Chanéac, we’re being treated to another marginally hot yet horribly wrong murderous beast for two hours of cleavage and mayhem. And while it’s awesome that the vampires and werewolves in Twilight all look like they should be trying to sell you sweater vests, most movie beasts have no business trying to stir up unwholesome feelings in you. And yet, despite how obvious it is that nothing that can eat you should give you a boner, filmmakers keep slipping dirty little things in there.Aliens

‘Resident Evil’ Has A 3D Poster And A Familiar Face

Tuesday, June 1 by

With all the focusing on who will or will not be objectified in Transformers 3, we've lost sight of another important issue. Will someone accessorize their tube top with a gun holster in Resident Evil: Afterlife? Answer is yes. Actress Milla Jovovich tweeted that Sienna Guillory will return to the role of Jill Valentine in the sequel.“So to answer many of your questions in one fell swoop, yes! The gorgeous and talented Sienna Guillory is back as Jill Valentine in RE4!!!” That's pretty much what I just said. You guys could have just taken my word for it. Jerks. In other Resident Evil news, ultimate-re has released a new "3D" poster for the movie. But be warned, it's 3D in the same sense that the "Lost" finale supplied closure.CHECK OUT THE POSTER AFTER THE JUMP…

Peter Jackson Prefers Belgians to Hobbits

Tuesday, June 1 by

When Guillermo del Toro dropped out of the directors chair for The Hobbit, one replacement immediately came to mind: Peter Jackson. But Jackson seems dead set against directing the prequel to the Lord of the Rings trilogy unless his presence is absolutely necessary.“If that's what I have to do to protect Warner Bros' investment, then obviously that's one angle which I'll explore.” This assumes that it’s even possible. He explains, “The other studios may not let me out of the contracts.” Currently, once such contract has Jackson directing the third installment of the upcoming Tintin series. Will Tintin, the tale of an effeminate, Nazi sympathizing Belgian and his little white dog, prove to be as lucrative as The Hobbit, the long awaited adaptation of one of the most popular fantasy books in history? Only time will tell. (CinemaBlend)

Martial Arts Star Tony Jaa Becomes a Buddhist Monk

Tuesday, June 1 by

Martial Arts star Tony Jaa, best known for his work in the film Ong-Bak, has joined a Buddhist Monastery in Surin, Thailand. The move comes after a failed attempt at directing the first Ong-Bak sequel, and the poor box-office showing of Ong-Bak 3. The now bald actor took his vows on May 28th and will serve as a monk for an unknown amount of time.I sincerely hope that this trend makes its way to Hollywood.  After the disappointing failure of Sex and the City 2, it would be nice to see the cast forced to join a Catholic convent deep in the Italian back country, or to have Shia LaBeouf commit ritual suicide to alleviate the shame he feels for Indiana Jones 4 and Transformers 2. God be praised! (SlashFilm)

Victoria’s Secret Congratulates Rosie Huntington-Whiteley with a Spank Video

Monday, May 31 by

Much to the delight of teenage boys everywhere, Rosie Huntington-Whiteley was named as Megan Fox's replacement for Transformers 3. And to commemorate Rosie's new job, her former employer, Victoria's Secret, has put out this video featuring the lingerie model's greatest hits. After all, what better way to celebrate her impending objectification at the hands of Michael Bay than with an objectifying underwear ad/spank film? And based on her performance in the ad, I'm smelling Oscar! Wait, no. That's smegma. See Rosie Huntington-Whiteley's acting talent on display after the jump.

Drunk Memorial Day Barbecue Post: Black ‘Spider-Man’ Debate

Monday, May 31 by

My stupid sisters in-law is a racists!So here I amm, drinking off my ass off, enjoying my brothers bbq, when all of the sudden hes wife starts running hers mouth asbout Spiderman.  I don't tal aabout to her abouut being a loudmouth b****itch, so why dos she try to talks to me about SPidey?So anyyways, she starts saying spidermans should'tn be the black guy from nbc's"Cimmunity", (Donald Glover), and I'm all like "why the f*** knot?!" Spiderman is a fictucious characters, so why not let a black guy play him for a chage.Its not like we're taking about a reel charcter from the real world. If Toby McGuire was playing martin lawrence king jr., that woulnd be tottally rasicsit? But spidey man is not real. See what I mean?I hate my sister-in-laww. She is so stupid and rascist. She went to a 2 yrs college and never left home. I went to a foureyear schools andf spents semesters in Spain, so I hace more perspecives, ya know.If you want a good movie about black people, you should watch The Wire! That's the best mocvie about black people their is. I should make my sister in laws watch The Wire, then she'd be cool with black spidey. God my siter in law is a b***ch.

‘Finding Bliss’ Actress Christa Campbell

Monday, May 31 by

Usually when an actress starts her career doing softcore Skinimax movies, she ends her it doing hardcore porn, but Christa Campbell has managed to get more mainstream with every credit. She went from Erotic Landscapes to Lonely Hearts, and can be seen in Finding Bliss, which opens June 4 in NYC and June 11 in L.A. Reruns of her Skinimax movies can be seen on Skinimax.A word from Christa: "Life live, enjoy."And a l'chaim to you too, kind lady. Much more of Christa's skin after the jump.

‘Always Sunny’ Comes to Comedy Central Tonight

Monday, May 31 by

The Birth of Day Man from Always Sunny – Watch more Funny Videos Two cheers for syndication! One of your favorite shows in this whole big, wide universe is coming to TV sets on a more regular basis. Starting tonight at 9pm/8c, "Always Sunny in Philadelphia" will drag you kicking and screaming into rerun heaven every Monday on Comedy Central with four back-to-back episodes. The Gang can be your real friends because real friends are overrated, right The Gang? You can't see, but Charlie Day just nodded his head at me. Eeeeeee, I'm so popular! To get you in the mood, I've posted a clip of one of the best scenes of all time from the show. You've probably seen Charlie and Dennis sing "Day-Man" a good thousand times, but why don't you just stop complaining, huff some more of that spray paint, and click play. Catch "Always Sunny" tonight at 9pm/8c on Comedy Central.

‘Scott Pilgrim vs. The World’ Trailer Harnesses Gamer Power

Monday, May 31 by

If only real life offered 1-Ups… The Scott Pilgrim vs. The World Facebook page hit 100,000 fans at 1:30am this morning, and that means the full length trailer has been unleashed. A big thank you goes out to all the drunks who stumbled back to their homes last night and stamped barbeque sauce on their keyboards as they eagerly "Liked" the fan page. Scott Pilgrim, based off the graphic novels by Bryan Lee O'Malley, follows a guy (Michael Cera) as he tries to defeat a girl's (Mary Elizabeth Winstead) seven evil ex-boyfriends in order to make shiz official with her. His world becomes a big video game full of 1-Ups, vibrant color trails, and onamonapias. According to the film's tag, the studio wants you to believe  that it's on like Donkey Kong, but unless one of the ex-boyfriends is a giant ape in a dress tie, I'm going to have to insist that it's on like something else. Check out the trailer after the jump. Scott Pilgrim vs. The World BAMS! into theaters August 13, 2010.

Guillermo Del Toro Peaces Out of ‘The Hobbit’

Sunday, May 30 by

"What's that I see, MGM? Me droppin' your ass!"Guillermo Del Toro has officially stepped away from directing duties on The Hobbit, a film that for the past two years has really been more of a wish than an actual project. Guillermo made the announcement on The Lord of the Rings fansite“In light of ongoing delays in the setting of a start date for filming “The Hobbit,” I am faced with the hardest decision of my life. After nearly two years of living, breathing and designing a world as rich as Tolkien’s Middle Earth, I must, with great regret, take leave from helming these wonderful pictures."He said he would continue collaborating on the scripts with Peter Jackson, Fran Walsh and Phillippa Boyens. Guillermo decided to leave the project due to the fact that most directors enjoy directing movies and floundering MGM doesn't have the cheddar to make The Hobbit a reality. Sure, they say they'll have the cheddar eventually, but if the company were dealing with a bookie, all of that lion's legs would be broken and his cubs would blindfolded and gagged in a room with leaky pipes. Lesson: don't make promises you can't honor. Now go back to your burgers and hot dogs, readers.   

‘Shrek Forever After’ is Better Than ‘Sex’

Sunday, May 30 by

A cheap and tired joke? Perhaps, but screw you! I'm working on a holiday!A film about an ogre, a donkey, an overweight pussy and woman who alternates between hot and disgusting ended up losing to Shrek Forever After at the weekend box-office. Sex and the City 2 took in an estimated $32.1 million (Friday to Sunday), compared with Sherk's $43 million.The poor showing by SATC2 seriously calls into question any hope of a third installment, which is the best news I've heard all month. However, Sex fans can take solace in the fact that they did better than Prince of Persia: The Sands of Time, which brought in only $30.1 million despite a budget rumored at $200 million. (HitFix)

‘Green Lantern’ Plot Synopsis Leaked

Sunday, May 30 by

I just assumed Green Lantern would tell the story of a test pilot who finds a ring that grants him fantastic powers. CBM got the official synopsis and it's so much more than that. Just kidding. It's still about a guy who finds a ring. Why am I posting this? I think the more important question is why am I not at a barbeque?? Let's have those two questions answer one another.FULL SYNOPSIS AND CAST AND CREW DETAILS AFTER THE JUMP…

Dennis Hopper Has Died

Saturday, May 29 by

Dennis Hopper has died at the age of 74 due to complications from prostate cancer. The actor best known for his roles as manic, narcotic enthusiasts started his career playing tamer characters. He starred as the son of wealthy rancher Rock Hudson in Giant, and a convict in Paul Newman's corner in Cool Hand Luke.It was his turn as a hippie biker in Easy Rider, a hippie journalist in Apocalypse Now, and oxygen-sucking Frank Booth in Blue Velvet that made us all realize what Hopper was preparing for his entire career — blowing up Keanu Reeves in Speed. Or playing King Koopa in Super Mario Bros. I get those two roles mixed up. Either way, let's hope he's at the pearly gates right now giving St. Peter a pop quiz. Hot shot.You'll be missed, Mr. Hopper.