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Hitler Hears About Sandra Bullock’s Woes

Tuesday, March 23 by

Who would have thought The Fuhrer is such a big fan of Sandy's? (Vulture)Here are today's links. Movie Stars Most Likely to Get Naked (Moviefone) U.S. Pole Dance Champ Crowned (Asylum)Security to Keep Women from Tiger (PopEater)Relationship Translator (HolyTaco)Birdemic Director on Public Access TV (FilmDrunk)Superhero Fails Never Get Old (Unreality)Erin Andrews Shows Off Her Naughty Moves (TotalProSports)A Guide to Things Named "Ice" (Maxim)World's Best Butter Sculptures (Smosh)Miley Cyrus Pleasure a Leprechaun (CelebJihad)Duance Ludwig is Going to Be Out For a While (CagePotato)Top 5 Black Female Leading Roles (Pajiba)Evan and Gareth: Threeway (Atom)Best Drunk Food Recipes (MadeMan)Johnson and Busch: A Rivalry in the Making (AllLeftTurns)Epic Boobs Girl Found! (RegretfulMorning)

IFC Scoops Up All the Good Comedies

Tuesday, March 23 by

I was pretty vocal with my disappointment that David Cross's "The Increasingly Poor Decisions of Todd Margaret" wouldn't air on American television. I mean, c'mon, those lucky Brits have the world on a string — awesome weather, those Jedward guys, and unsurpassed prevention of prostitute murder. Well, it was rumored before and now it's official. Beginning this fall, IFC will air David Cross's fish out of water comedy as well as two other very funny series. A TV version of The Onion News Network (Winter 2011) and the Kids in the Hall reunion series "Kids in the Hall: Death Comes to Town" (August 2010) have earned slots on the channel's schedule. Elsewhere, Comedy Central will be airing reruns of "Krod Mandoon" and "Naked Trucker & T-Bone's Show" ad nauseum. (Time)

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Lizzy Caplan

Tuesday, March 23 by

Best know for her roles in ‘Mean Girls’ and the fantastic ‘Party Down’.

‘Twilight Eclipse’ One-Sheet Isn’t Even Trying

Tuesday, March 23 by

The new one-sheet for Twilight: Eclipse just hit and the cast couldn't look more apathetic about it. I believe the point here is to convey that the actors Twihards cream over will also be in this film. The marketing gurus probably figured they could have given the characters assholes for eyes and it wouldn't make a difference at the box office.

‘Scream 4′ Gets a Release Date

Tuesday, March 23 by

I Googled "scream" and this came up.Dimension Films has confirmed that Scream 4 will go into production in Spring 2010 for an April 12th, 2011 release. Wes Craven will again direct, as initially suspected, and original Scream creator Kevin Williamson will write the script. Neve Campbell, Courtney Cox, and (unfortunately) David Arquette Cox will all be reprising their roles. I really hope David takes his character Dewey to full retard in this one. It doesn't make sense for him to scale back his own personality just for the sake of acting. (Variety)

No ‘Anchorman 2′ For You!

Tuesday, March 23 by

In 2004, Anchorman swept through theaters and supplied comedy nerds, Snorg Tees, and douchebags on MTV dating shows with catchphrases galore. Sadly, the unjust box office failure of Brüno has caused a catchphrase drought, one that won't be remedied by the Channel 4 news team apparently. After failing to reunite all the players for Anchorman 2, Will Ferrell is waving the white flag of surrender. He tells IMDB, "I thought we were doing it. Now I've heard it's going to be too hard to get everyone together."That's sad for the many fans of Anchorman, but totally understandable. Will Ferrell, Steve Carrell, Paul Rudd, and David Koechner are far too busy providing cameos in one another's movies to actually get together to film a movie.

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20 Poor Pugs in Movie Costumes

Tuesday, March 23 by

Why are pugs specifically so much fun to humiliate?Teen Wolf Pug Syriana Pug Tin Man Pug Arachnophobia Pug Spiderman Pug 

‘Popeye’ to Undergo Much Needed Reboot

Tuesday, March 23 by

Popeye wrestles with his demon.Move over, Stallone. Another aged strongman prone to using performance-enhancers is making his way back to theaters. Variety reports that Sony Pictures Animation will be releasing a computer animated Popeye in 3D. The storyline is being kept under wraps but producer Avi Arad has said it "will cover the themes of friendship, love, greed and life, and focus on human strengths and human frailties.” Hey, did he just steal the logline from The Room?This obviously follows the trend of other cartoon to film adaptations such as Garfield, The Smurfs, Underdog, Marmaduke, and Alvin and the Chipmunks. I only hope the sailorman sticks to eating spinach and not his own sh*t.

‘Rec 2′ Infesting Theaters This July?

Tuesday, March 23 by

With a shortage of movies about people running around and biting other people hitting screens this summer, it's very good news that Rec 2 may find its way to American theaters. Bloody Disgusting has reported that Magnolia Pictures is close to securing a July theatrical run for the gory sequel with Sony aiming to put it on DVD in October.This is of course the sequel to Rec, the shaky cam Spanish horror film that spawned the love-it-or-hate-it nearly shot for shot American remake Quarantine. Sony has announced that Quarantine 2's action will be set in a cordoned off airport as opposed to Rec 2's infested tenement. I'll definitely check it out this July. I only hope the subtitles count towards my summer reading. **adjusts ascot, straightens helmet**

Han Solo Catches on to ‘Star Wars’ Incest

Monday, March 22 by

The disturbing part is he's TOTALLY into it.Share these links with your siblings.Aziz Ansari Might Host MTV Movie Awards (Moviefone)New Book Promises Orgasms for Everyone (Asylum)Ben Folds Takes on Doppelganger (PopEater)2010 Douchebag Tournament: Sweet 16! (HolyTaco)Serbian Machete Sex? Serbian Machete Sex. (FilmDrunk)10 Most Memorable Elevator Scenes in Movies (Unreality)Knicks Cheerleaders as Bad as Their Team (TotalProSports)Our Healthcare System Explained (Maxim)Aliens in Classic Paintings (Smosh)Joe Jonas Definitely Not Gay (CelebJihad)UFC Live Aftermath (CagePotato)An Interview with Christopher Gauthier (Pajiba)Tell Tech Support How You Really Feel (Atom)How to Avoid Being a Lovable Slub (MadeMan)25 Nasty NASCAR Crashes (AllLeftTurns)

Chris Evans Officially Captain America

Monday, March 22 by

Cheer up, Chris. You're set for life now.The great search is finally over! Marvel and Joe Johnston have found their Captain America. Chris Evans, the guy who wore the whipped cream bikini in Not Another Teen Movie, accepted the coveted role today. They still have to work out all the minor details in what I'm sure is a massive contract, but I can officially say that I don't have to report on this story any longer. Hallelujah!Marvel scoured all of Hollywood to find the right actor to play The First Avenger. Ryan Phillippe was in the running along with Channing Tatum and the guy with the hair from Gossip Girl, but Chris Evans emerged victorious. In your face, pretty boys! They got a pretty boy who can grow a beard for the job. (THR)

Hogwarts Nearly Burned to the Ground

Monday, March 22 by

When not busy murdering children, Voldemort spends his time busking for change in the town square.Pyrotechnics went awry on the set of Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows over the weekend but the fire department was able to prevent Leavesden Studios from going the way of a Great White concert. A second unit team was filming a big effect for the "climactic battle of Hogwarts" sequence when a blaze raged out of control. An exterior courtyard set was destroyed but it reportedly needed to be rebuilt anyway. How convenient. "We were gonna burn that down anyway" sounds better than "we f*cked up."No castmembers were on set at the time. Just crewmembers. Plebians really. So don't you worry, teenage girls and creepy older chicks in my office. Daniel Radcliffe's ripped abdominals were unscathed. (/Film)

Sex Toys, Etc. in ‘Get Him To The Greek’ Red Band Trailer

Monday, March 22 by

Jonah Hill balks at twelve inches. It's amazing the difference between a trailer that's allowed to show dildos and one that isn't. Sometimes I watch both the rated and unrated promos for a film and still think it's going to blow, but Get Him to the Greek states the perfect case for the necessity of red band. Johah Hill plays a schlubby record label intern who's assigned by big boss P. Diddy to escort rock star Aldous Snow to his comeback concert in Los Angeles. Along the way he gets sex toys in the face, drugs up the butt, and stands really close to Russell Brand, three traditional British customs. Why their ladies worship a man who looks like a mangy Persian cat I'll never understand. Check out the red band trailer after the jump. Get Him to the Greek rocks theaters June 4, 2010.

Malkovich, McDormand, and Jeong Je-oin ‘Transformers 3′

Monday, March 22 by

Though his Spiderman 4 role never became a reality, it looks like John Malkovich won't be missing out on a blockbuster payday. Deadline reports that Oscar nominee and Oscar winner Frances McDormand will slum it for Michael Bay in Transformers 3. I guess Malkovich wants something worse than Con-Air on his resume. Malkovich will play LaBeouf's first boss while McDormand will play the National Intelligence Director.Ken Jeong of The Hangover and Community is also joining the cast. This news worries me given Bay's penchant for representing ethnic characters as racial stereotypes. Here's hoping he doesn't go the angry, yelling Korean guy route. If so, he could have saved some money by hiring Dat Phan. 

‘Hot Tub Time Machine’ Actress Diora Baird

Monday, March 22 by

Diora Baird's friends call her Dee Dee, as in 32DD, and yes, they are real. She's the girl in Wedding Crashers that makes Owen Wilson realize he needs to quit sticking his d*ck in everything. Question: How in holy hell could Diora make you realize that?! A word from Diora: "I learned very quickly that if a producer wants to have dinner with me, he wants to f*ck me." It's a shame you're such a narrow-minded woman. What if he just wants to enjoy the company of an extremely busty, gorgeous female companion who–I can't finish that with a straight face. Find out why producers want to f*ck Diora after the jump.

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