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‘MacGruber’ Does Whatever It Takes in New Red-Band Trailer

Thursday, April 1 by

Another red-band trailer for MacGruber has arrived online for you kids to enjoy. Though this peek lacks boobs and butts, it does manage to explode in your face with potty mouth and murder. And if the thought of that arouses you in anyway, you and I have very different definitions of "potty mouth." All in all, I'm getting really excited to see this movie. It's a far better love letter to '80's action than The A-Team seems to be. Between all the looks we've been given at the racier materials, I expect to laugh long and hard. Just like that time that old guy fell off his bike while I was driving by. Hahahaha. So old. What's the deal with celery? After the jump.

‘Clash of the Titans’ Actress Izabella Miko

Thursday, April 1 by

Izabella Miko grew up in Warsaw, where she studied to be a ballerina. An American choreographer invited her to study in New York City on a scholarship, and she traveled there with her mother on her 15th birthday. Then she danced on top of a bar in Coyote Ugly. Talk about a step back…A word from Izabella: "It always makes me sick when I see hundreds of plastic bottles in huge trash bins."I'll get some bums over there right away, Ms. Miko. We'll take care of your recycling, no problem.More pics of eco-conscious Izabella after the jump.

New ‘The A-Team’ Trailer Spits in Gravity’s Face

Thursday, April 1 by

"Just sliding down a building with my feet. No big deal." Warning: If you thought the last trailer for The A-Team was ridiculous you better redefine your idea of the word. Otherwise this new trailer will boggle your sense of reason so completely that you may need to self inflict pain in order to keep a firm grasp on reality. Most of this is Rampage Jackson's doing. Liam Neeson, Bradley Cooper, Sharlto Copley, and the aforementioned gravity-defying Jackson all look like badasses in the action-packed trailer, but I think it's Patrick Wilson who really deserves a shoutout. Not only is he playing the villain, which we don't see much from him, but there's no indication that he's in danger of losing his testicles in this movie. After Hard Candy and Barry Munday, Wilson must have wanted to branch out and take on one of those "non-castration" type of roles. Check out The A Team trailer after the jump, if you're capable of suspending your sense of disbelief.

‘Salt’ Trailer Provides a Better Look at Boobs and Explosions

Thursday, April 1 by

The day Angelina went goth. Also the day Jon Voight lost her. We've shown you the teaser in both English and Russian (our apologies to the French) and today we have a more in-depth look at what the hell is going on in Salt. Well, no. Not really. But we do see more karate and sex. You all dig that, right? Karate and sex?? (loosens gi) Salt opens in theaters on July 23rd. You'll have to wait until then to learn what would happen if Tom Cruise had boobs. Karate and sex, you guys. After the jump.

‘Community’ vs. Community College

Thursday, April 1 by

Since the start of NBC TV’s fall season we have been treated to the hilarious and at times very cynical life of the Greendale Community College student in the aptly titled show “Community.”  From the oddball university reject scholar to the burnt out faculty and scheming administration, the show never fails to deliver the wacky world of affordable education.   For the past 5 years of my post-high school life this is a world I’ve know far too well, with my main thought being what can I do to get a C grade around here.Let us now do a comparison of the characters we watch on TV’s “Community” and what we would see on a real community college campus, a place where anyone with $26 dollars (the cost per academic unit in California) in their pocket can claim to have some college experience.

Aronofsky Back on ‘Robocop’, Sam Worthington May Star

Thursday, April 1 by

Last we heard, Darren Aronofsky had decided to walk from the troubled Robocop remake due to his unwillingness to present the film in gimmicky 3D. It appears that he and the cash-strapped MGM have worked something out and he's ready to create the future of law enforcement according to our source. An insider at Digital Dimension has confirmed their company has been conducting visual effects tests and have received a great deal of feedback from Aronofsky. Word is that he "just loves the stuff." Our tipster also made mention that Sam Worthington is very likely to fill the role of Officer Murphy. It's his role to lose from what we've been told. Of course, Worthington's schedule is jam-packed with the adaptations of Dan Dare and The Last Days of American Crime and there's no official word when Robocop will ramp up. Though it is expected that Aronofsky is deciding between that or Serena with hot mom Angelina Jolie as his next project. We'll keep you posted. We realize this news sounds dodgy so to sweeten the pot we have an EXCLUSIVE look at early composite from Digital Dimension AFTER THE JUMP…

Al Bundy Gets Funky, Mon

Wednesday, March 31 by

Al Bundy always knew how to have a good time at the optometrist. (IWatchStuff) These links look better with silly glasses on. The Real Overlook Hotel from 'The Shining' (Moviefone) The Smartest Milk Jug Ever (Asylum) Joseph Gordon-Levitt Wants to Work With Cats (PopEater) 25 Terrifying Easter Bunnies (HolyTaco) Steven Spielberg is Paranoid (FilmDrunk) Ninetendo Car Engine Mod (Unreality) Sexy Aerobics Girl (TotalProSports) Easter Eye Candy (Maxim) Val Kilmer with Laser Eyes! (Smosh) Blake Lively Gets Spanked (CelebJihad) UFC Fight Night Results: The Prelims (CagePotato) Roland Emmerich Tackles Shakespeare (Pajiba) Just Some Dude in Panties Partying (Atom) How to Fight a Bull (MadeMan) LOL Race Pics (AllLeftTurns)

‘Harold & Kumar’ to Light Up Screens Once More

Wednesday, March 31 by

Everyone's favorite stoners (besides Cheech & Chong; Spiccoli; the guys in Half-Baked; Chris Tucker's Smokey; The Dude; Method Man and Redman; the Pineapple Expressers; Jay and Silent Bob; the guy with the hat in Dazed and Confused; Kristen Stewart; Tenacious D; Snoop Dogg; Doug Benson; and Brenda Blethyn in Saving Grace) Harold & Kumar are gearing up for another big screen adventure.  The sequel will be Christmas-themed and marks the return of Kal Penn to Hollywood, after he joined forces with Obama as the associate director of Made-Up Position.Producers are seriously considering releasing the film in 3D, because if there's one thing their target audience (guys who work the night-shift at Carvel) have, it's $25 for a movie ticket. (Deadline)

Anna Faris to Star in ‘Private Benjamin’ Remake

Wednesday, March 31 by

Russell Brand will be added in post.Up until last week, Goldie Hawn comedy remakes were an untapped Goldie-mine (slaps self, faxes resume to Leno). Then came news that Jennifer Lopez would focus her being a B-word energies toward a remake of Overboard. And this morning comes casting that makes more sense. Anna Faris is strapping on Hawn's combat boots for a remake of Private Benjamin. From THR:“Private Benjamin” is being called up to duty again. New Line is remaking the seminal 1980 comedy, reconfiguring it for the new century as a starring vehicle for Anna Faris.“Benjamin” starred Goldie Hawn in a star-making turn as a spoiled woman who joins the Army after her husband dies during sex on their wedding night.The new take will set the story in contemporary times with modern wars as the backdrop. Insiders say the studio doesn’t want to poke fun at the men and women in the service or take political potshots, but rather focus on the empowerment elements and build on the fish-out-of-water comedy.Her character's husband dies during sex on their wedding night? Maybe a more suitable casting choice would have been Tara Reid. I figure any healthy man has about 40 or 45 seconds to live once her saliva absorbs into his bloodstream.

‘The Expendables’ Trailer

Wednesday, March 31 by

The trailer for the powerhouse action film The Expendables has hammer-punched its way on to the Internetz. It stars Sylvester Stallone, Jason Statham, Jet Li, Terry Crews, Bruce Willis, Randy Couture, Dolph Lundgren, and Arnold Schwarzenegger, The Governator himself. Until now I was unaware that celluloid could contain that much raw power. Add a theme song by the guy from Godsmack and the package is complete. I don't know about you, but I feel like wrestling a Minotaur! Check out the trailer below. The Expendables busts into theaters August 13, 2010. ROAAAAR!!!!

‘The Last Song’ Actress Kelly Preston

Wednesday, March 31 by

Kelly Preston, a.k.a. Mrs. Jon Travolta, first caught my attention when she was banging Tom Cruise's brains out against a bookcase in Jerry Maguire. Then later she clocked him smack in the mouth and my heart went aflutter. Is a Scientologist allowed to strike another Scientologist, even if it's make-believe? On second thought, I guess make-believe is a huge part of their beliefs. A word from Kelly: "I got caught playing doctor in my grandma's garage, but, you know, it was very minor, just like sticking things in the heinie." What was minor to you could have been a turning point in your patient's life. Check out more pics of Dr. Preston after the jump.

‘Baywatch’ Hires Even More Writers

Wednesday, March 31 by

Paramount seems very serious about actually making a Baywatch movie. So serious in fact, that they've now brought on five writers to capture the elusive tone of the master work. Brian Gatewood and Alessandro Tanaka (who wrote Jonah Hill's The Sitter) have been brought in to polish drafts from The Break-Up's Jeremy Garlick and National Security writers Jay Scherick and David Ronn. It's said the film is to be in the vain of the Charlie's Angels revamp with more of a focus on female action (read: jiggliness).Though no director or castmembers have been hired, we already know where this thing is going. Heidi Montag to star and Zack Snyder to direct. Both are masterful at capturing slow-motion running for different reasons. I'd imagine David Hasslehoff would make some kind of appearance as no actor alive can perform mouth to mouth on a cheeseburger as well as he can. Well, maybe Vince Vaughn could. (THR)

Kaley Cuoco Joins Non-Pancake Comedy ‘I, Hop’

Wednesday, March 31 by

Russell Brand will be added in post. Before you start salivating, this movie isn't about a tall stack smothered in maple syrup with a side of hash browns and sausage. Kaley Cuoco, Sheldon's dreamy tall stack on The Big Bang Theory, has joined the Easter Bunny comedy (is that a thing?) I, Hop. Russell Brand and James Marsden are already set to star in the film that I'm sure will do for Easter what Adam Sandler's Eight Crazy Nights did for Hanukkah. Cuoco will play Marsden's character's sister, "who allows Marsden to live with her when he gets kicked out by his parents because he injures a big f*cking bunny rabbit and brings it home to live with him." Talk about a bad house guest! I just hope there's a gag with him in a mailbox. That joke gets me every time. (THR)

Everyone’s Back for ‘The Hangover 2′

Wednesday, March 31 by

Warner Bros never expected The Hangover to become successful enough to lead to a sequel so they didn't sign the actors up for additional films. Though it's been expected that Bradley Cooper, Ed Helms, and Zach Galifianakis would return for another day of delirium tremens, nothing was confirmed until today.Deadline reports that each actor will be paid in the $5 million range. That's a huge step upward considered they didn't earn $1 million collectively for the original film. I'm terrified/delighted to see what Zach Galifianakis will spend that money on. If anyone sees someone driving a hovercraft on the freeway, it's probably him. Director Todd Phillips will be cashing in as well, though his gamble to receive 15% of the original's gross has already made him a very rich man.No plot specifics for the sequel have been released yet, though I have a sinking suspicion it involves drinking and trying to remember what Galifianakis stuck his penis into the previous night.

The Bluths Strike Back

Tuesday, March 30 by

Still waiting for this to hit the big screen.Today's links are ready now for your viewing pleasure. Actors Who Have Played Identical Twins (Moviefone)Is Porn Good for Society? (Asylum)James Franco is Smarter Than You (PopEater)25 Hot Spring Break Girls (HolyTaco)An E-Trade Baby Movie? You're Sh*tting Me. (FilmDrunk)12 Acapella Versions of Your Favorite Themes (Unreality)Hot Bikini Girls Mud Wrestling (TotalProSports)21 Monkeys Being Awesome (Maxim)Stupid Baby Tricks (Smosh)Huge Collection of Jennifer Aniston's Rump (CelebJihad)Gambling Addiction Enabler: UFC Fight Night 21 (CagePotato)160 Greatest Schwarzenegger Quotes (Pajiba)3D Cooking Show (Atom)Building Your Man Garage (MadeMan)Hamlin Enjoys Some Goody's Pain Relief (AllLeftTurns)7 Ways to Still Use Your Small Penis (RegretfulMorning)

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