14 HOTTEST CHICKS FROM MICHAEL BAY FILMS

Wednesday, June 24 by

All this week, BAYWATCH '09 has given you the goods on all things that go BOOM.  Monday was the 10 Best Michael Bay-directed Music Videos… Tuesday was the first ever Michael Bay Explosion Tournament… Well, it wouldn't be a proper Bay-themed week without cleavage.  You're welcome.   By Thomas Anderson It doesn’t matter how many movies Michael Bay comes out with; you still get the sense that he just might be sitting there behind the camera, sneaking a peek at Megan Fox’s stomach or Scarlet Johansson’s ass (hell, wouldn’t you?). Sometimes you wonder if he cast them simply so he could ogle them from behind the camera and create a few off-camera explosions in his pants, but you’ve got to hand it to the guy: he knows how to populate his worlds with gorgeous bombshells who are strong, independent women who often find the need to remove their clothes to save the world, or maybe just give the hero a little pick-me-up.

“BLOOD SIMPLE” IS BEING REMADE IN CHINA

Wednesday, June 24 by

In the past seven years we've seen a glut of Asian movies remade on our shores. Some of them fantastic, others craptastic. Well, now it looks like the shoe is on the other foot. The Playlist reports that House of Flying Daggers director Zhang Yimou is remaking the Coen Brothers classic Blood Simple in his homeland of China. I hope this does well and leads to more retreads on foreign soil because I personally would love to see a Japanese version of Goodfellas. How great would that be? All the gangsters would dress like Elvis and gesture wildly like Lenny and Squiggy. "What's that? You think I'm clown? I amuse you, hound dog?"Oh my God. This film needs to be made. Somebody get Japan on the phone. Perhaps I can interest you in these other morning headlines…Avatar footage screened at Cinema Expo. Jaws subsequently dropped. (THR)David Fincer to SuperPoke filmgoers. (First Showing)Joseph Gordon-Levitt: "GI Joe is about the acting." (NY Mag)Transformers scribes discuss the nuts and bolts of ROTF. (io9)Sigourney Weaver on Ghostbusters and Alien sequels. (Cinematical) 7 Nagging Inconsistencies in Back to the Future. (Nerdist) 

Jon & Kate Plus Separ(Eight)

Tuesday, June 23 by Reza F.

John Gosselin is free!!!  Jon & Kate announced on their show yesterday that they are getting a divorce after ten years of marriage.  I find this less surprising than the fact that they have eight children and are still legally sane.  Divorce is sad, but for the kids that means twice as many Christmas presents, right?!  Wait, it just means twice as much therapy?  Booooo…          

NEW ‘THE LAST AIRBENDER’ TRAILER

Tuesday, June 23 by

  M. Night Shyamalan is back…but there's a twist!  He's doing a kid's movie.  I guess he decided to take a break from "scary" since the scariest part about his most recent films are how not scary they are.  The Last Airbender is about an Avatar who has the ability to manipulate elements and bring nations together.  Also, according to the trailer, he can blow out a shitload of candles with palm-breath.  Call me oldfashioned, but I still prefer farts.    Teresa Noreen Looks Hot On The Beach (GorillaMask) More Appropriate Album Covers (HolyTaco) Britney Spears Offered Role In Time-Traveling Holocaust Flick (FilmDrunk) 55 Ridiculous Photos Of Dogs Dressed As Humans (Manofest) Who Doesn't Need A Keyboard Designed To Look Like S'mores? (Walyou) Best Film Performances By Senior Citizens (Pajiba) Scientology's 5 Newest Celebrity Recruits (Cracked) 7 Creepy Asian Toilet Commercials (SickPigs) Weed Decriminalization Bill Proposed To House (CoedMagazine) Examinging Fight! Magazine's Inagural Hall Of Fame Class (CagePotato) 5 Minutes Of Game Footage From E3 Favorite, Uncharted 2 (Unreality) A Superficial Analysis Of The (Hottest) Wimbeldon Women (Asylum) Everyone Needs Some Funny Christopher Walken Swag (MadeMan) Sean Avery, Dude Who Made Fun Of 'Sloppy Seconds,' Now Getting Mark Sanchez' Sloppy Seconds (BustedCoverage) 10 Funny Pictures Of Celebrities As Bruce Lee (Uncoached) 5 Truthful Graduation Cards (RegretfulMorning) Get An Ornate Bowl Of Fire For Your Home (BachelorGuy) Top 10 NBA Draft Busts (MoondogSports)

Temp Tues Link Dump

Tuesday, June 23 by

Teresa Noreen Looks Hot On The Beach (GorillaMask) Britney Spears Offered Role In Time-Traveling Holocaust Flick (FilmDrunk)55 Ridiculous Photos Of Dogs Dressed As Humans (Manofest)Who Doesn't Need A Keyboard Designed To Look Like S'mores? (Walyou)Best Film Performances By A Senior Citizen (Pajiba)Scientology's 5 Newest Celebrity Recruits (Cracked)

THE MICHAEL BAY EXPLOSION TOURNAMENT

Tuesday, June 23 by

VOTING FOR ROUND 1 IS CLOSED, BUT YOU CAN STILL VOTE FOR WHO GOES TO THE BIG BOOM CHAMPIONSHIP MATCHUP!

The Last Airbender

Tuesday, June 23 by Reza F.

Director: M. Night ShyamalanCast: Dev Patel, Cliff CurtisSynopsis: The story follows the adventures of Aang, a ten year old successor to a long line of Avatars, who must put his childhood ways aside and stop the Fire Nation from enslaving the Water, Earth and Air nations.

‘THE ZOOKEEPER’ GETS VOICES

Tuesday, June 23 by Reza F.

 According to Variety, Hollywood is making yet another family film with animals that's sure to rake in millions.  The Zookeeper, starring Kevin James and Rosario Dawson, centers on zoo animals trying to teach the keeper their method of dating and mating to help him win back the woman of his dreams.  Cher's voicing a giraffe, Jon Favreau a bear, Sly Stallone a lion, and Judd Apatow an elephant.  If the film sticks to a realistic portrayal a great deal of the advice is going to involve forceful sexual advances.  In the animal kingdom, "no" doesn't mean no.  When Mr. Lion is horny he takes what he wants.  But surely if Kevin James persists there's going to be a HILARIOUS moment where a woman knees him in the balls.        

FINAL TRAILER FOR ROB ZOMBIES “HALLOWEEN 2″

Tuesday, June 23 by

Halloween 2 (2009) Trailer (HQ) – Watch more Funny VideosThe new trailer for Rob Zombie's Halloween 2 has stalked it's way online and shows us essentially more of the same. It's two years later and Michael Myers is once again rampaging through Haddonfield in an attempt to slay his little sister Laurie. If I were related to Michael Myers I'd move to somewhere like France where they don't celebrate Halloween. Or age of consent laws. (Pajiba) Bryan Fuller's all like, "F this!" (NY Mag) Dexter Season 4 poster makes our ovaries smile. (/Film) Transformers take over Vegas. (First Showing) Look closely and you'll notice Ron Jeremy in Ghostbusters. (Proton Charging) Trailer for Miyazaki's latest, Ponyo. (Empire)

‘INGLOURIOUS BASTERDS’ TRAILER #2

Monday, June 22 by

Trailer for HBO’s Spielberg/Hanks-Produced Miniseries ‘The Pacific’

Monday, June 22 by Reza F.

HBO Miniseries – THE PACIFIC – Watch more MOVIE TRAILERS Above is the trailer for the Steven Spielberg/Tom Hanks-produced "The Pacific."  It's a 10-Part miniseries dealing with three interwoven stories of American soldiers fighting the Japanese in the Pacific during World War II (hence the title).  If you look closely, you'll notice one of the key characters is played by Joseph Mazzello, whom you will undoubtedly remember as young Tim Murphy, the grandson of John Hammond… in Jurassic Paaaaaaaaahk.  I for one did a double take.  We missed you, Lil' Joey.  Here are today's Top Links, which also require double takes.Kellie Maines Hanging Out By The Water (GorillaMask) What Your Facial Hair Really Says About You (HolyTaco) Victoria Jackson Walked Out Of Year One, Citing Fat Gays As Problem (FilmDrunk) The 10 Sexiest Fast Food Commercials Of All Time (Manofest) Big Lebowski Bobble Heads… There's A Jesus, But No Walter? (Walyou) The Gooby Trailer Is Mildly Disturbing (Pajiba) 7 Man-Made Substances That Laugh In The Face Of Science (Cracked) Right-Wing College Students Rap About Conservatism, Lameness Ensues (SickPigs) American Grads Unemployable, Says Top Indian CEO (CoedMagazine) Extended Previews For UFC 100 (CagePotato) The 20 Best Comedies Of The Last Decade (Unreality) 11 Famous People Who Contracted Malaria (Asylum) Greg Oden, Now 21, Is Attracting All Kinds Up In The Club (BustedCoverage) Like The Giant Piano Scene In Big, But More Impressive (Uncoached) 5 Official Drinks Of Summer (RegretfulMorning) The 5 S's That Get You The Girl (BachelorGuy) Stupid Newspaper Headlines (MoondogSports) How To Cook On Your Car Engine (MadeMan) Ultra-Violent Videogames Don't Derange Kids, The World Of Warcraft Does (NothingToxic) More Of The Weirdest Games From Japan (AtomFilms) A 5-Minute Clip From The Animated Sci-Fi Flick 9 (Filmofilia)

THE PACIFIC

Monday, June 22 by

Cast: William Sadler, Nathan Corddry, Joseph Mazzello, Isabel LucasSynopsis: A 10-part mini-series from the creators of "Band of Brothers" telling the intertwined stories of three Marines during America's battle with the Japanese in the Pacific during World War II.Producers: Steven Spielberg, Tom HanksNetwork: HBO

NEW ‘INGLOURIOUS BASTERDS’ TRAILER

Monday, June 22 by

INGLOURIOUS BASTERDS Trailer #2 – Watch more Funny Videos  There's a new Inglourious Basterds trailer out today, this time delving a little deeper into what the film's actual plot might be.  To be honest though, I still don't really understand what's happening with this movie.  My level of enthusiasm for this film comes in waves, starting at a high level when I first heard about the film, then waning when I saw  the first teaser, and now just very confused about everything I'm seeing and feeling.  It's kind of like the first time you had a wet dream, at this point; you're confused as to how and why it happened, and also why Brad Pitt was wearing a white tux while speaking in a thick Appalachian accent. 

temp monday link dump

Monday, June 22 by

Kellie Maines Hanging Out By The Water (GorillaMask)What Your Facial Hair Really Says About You (HolyTaco)Victoria Jackson Walked Out Of Year One, Citing Fat Gays As Problem (FilmDrunk)The 10 Sexiest Fast Food Commercials Of All Time (Manofest)Big Lebowski Bobble Heads… There's A Jesus, But No Walter? (Walyou)The Gooby Trailer Is Mildly Disturbing (Pajiba)

BEST MICHAEL BAY-DIRECTED MUSIC VIDEOS

Monday, June 22 by

It's no secret that Screen Junkies loves Michael Bay, and to celebrate the release of Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen, we're calling this week BAYWATCH.  Every day for the next five days, there will be a new feature dedicated to Michael Bay, the man, the myth, the pyromaniac. Kicking off the week is a look back at Bay's earlier work. Before the Boom (and Bad Boys)… there was the music.  Michael Bay made his reputation on making music artists look really frickin' cool based on the aesthetic standards of the day.  Bay's work was dramatic.  It was gorgeous.  And it single-handedly supported Hollywood's "lens mist filter" and silk drapery industries for years.Here are our favorites, in chronological order. Richard Marx's "Angelia" (1989)