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‘Ring 3D’ to Crawl Out of Screens

Tuesday, April 27 by

Just the other day on Things I Never Say Day, I was saying how badly we need a sequel to The Ring. Preferably one that is 3D and focuses on a more teen-centric angle. Well, save up your shillings for an inflated ticket price because it looks like Paramount is intending to do just that. Dream House writer David Loucka on script duties. No details yet about how the girl in the old VHS will return but one scenario has teens finding a VCR that still works. Really?Okay. Honestly, you kids today with your Jason Beavers and sexting parties. VCR's aren't that old or difficult to find. Either this film takes place in 2025 or Afghanistan. (THR)

Burt Reynolds and Judd Nelson Don’t Recommend Drugs

Monday, April 26 by

The two actors, not exactly known for their straight-edge lifestyle, watch over Dermot Mulroney like a couple of hypocritical angels condemned to the boonies. Memorable quote: "When I was in high school, if you couldn't chug-a-lug a pint of booze you were nothing." So true, Burt Reynolds. That one night with a 6-pack of Hard Lemonade earned me a ton of street cred.You too much of a pussy to click on these links?20 Sexy Mermaids (Manofest)5 Useful New Photoshop Filters (CollegeHumor)$20 Million Movie Stars are a Dying Breed (Moviefone) Erotic Masseuse Shares Her Happy Ending Technique (Asylum)Tito Ortiz Allegedly Abused Jenna Jameson (PopEater)25 Cats Vs. Invisibility (HolyTaco)Shocker: Russell Crowe Is Difficult to Work With (FilmDrunk)5 Worst De Niro Movies (Unreality)Sexy Snake Handlers (Maxim)UFC Will Release Ortiz If Charges Hold Up (CagePotato)Justin Bieber Shows Her Breasts (CelebJihad)12 Crazy Detention Slips (Smosh)Rick Astley and the Human Centipede (Pajiba)Iron Man 3 Audition (Atom)How to Get Better Sleep (MadeMan)Another Wild Weekend in Talladega (AllLeftTurns)

‘Toy Story 3′ Lots-o’-Huggin’ Bear Viral Video

Monday, April 26 by

Think you can pull the wool over MY eyes, Pixar?! I knew this video for a supposed Lots-o'-Huggin' Bear was a Toy Story 3 ploy the second I hit play. Sure, it looks authentic, but if this bear really existed I would have owned the crap out of it back in 1983. It doesn't even matter that a bear with the word "hug" in its name doesn't even give hugs but instead just receives them (like a normal stuffed animal?), or that the grindhouse-esque commercial cuts off right before the bear slaughters the little girl in her sleep and then goes for the rest of the family. I simply had to have everything I saw advertised, or mother got the hose again. Check out the surprisingly well-done video after the jump. It must have taken the Pixar geniuses months to render the fuzzy tracking at the bottom of the frame.

Nicolas Cage Could Be Too Busy for ‘Ghost Rider 2′

Monday, April 26 by

"Doggarnit. People like me."It appears that Nicolas Cage's crappy sequel plate is full. It looks like the cash-strapped actor may be forced to choose between roles.  From Vulture:Insiders confirm to Vulture that Columbia is facing a ticking clock on the rights to the BBQ-skulled Marvel Comics character: Legally, if the studio isn't in production on a sequel by November 14, 2010, the franchise automatically reverts to Marvel — which means the comic company's new owner, Disney. Insiders tell us that Columbia is asking Marvel for an extension. (Asking, pleading, it's a fine line.) But time is running out. Cage has spoken about his desire to make a second Ghost Rider; the issue is whether his schedule will be free before the deadline. Disney is also hoping to get him for a third National Treasure with Jerry Bruckheimer, which could be shooting as early as this fall and would presumably earn the star a hefty paycheck. And considering Cage's well-documented money troubles, that cash may trump his deep love of comic books.A Ghost Rider without Nicolas Cage wouldn't feel like a Ghost Rider film at all. That would be like The Punisher without Thomas Jane, or The Hulk without Eric Bana, or Iron Man without Terrence Howard. I can't even imagine a world where such travesties would be allowed.

Horse Gattling Gun, Crossbow, Boom!, 11 Seconds of ‘Jonah Hex’

Monday, April 26 by

In case you can't wait for the Jonah Hex trailer dropping later this week, SyFy has 11 seconds of footage for your impatient ass. The movie has had so many different writers, directors, reshoots, and delays I can only imagine that the final product will be somewhere between tolerable and intolerable. Wait what, it features Megan Fox in a corset and gattling guns strapped to an aggravated stallion? Take my money, box office cashier! (Movieline)Check out the footage after the jump…

‘Dancing With The Stars’ Partner Cheryl Burke

Monday, April 26 by

Cheryl Burke is a two-time Emmy nominated professional dancer. As a professional dancer partner, she won the competition in the second and third seasons of "Dancing with the Stars" with celebrity dance partners Drew Lachey (February 2006) and Emmitt Smith (November 2006). She is of Filipino, Russian, and Irish descent, which makes for one bomb cocktail.  A word from Cheryl: "My greatest achievements in dancing are still to come."Come on, Cheryl. You taught Drew Lachey how to cut a rug. God has nothing left in store for you. Dancing does a body good after the jump.

Batman Live Is Coming to a Town Near You

Monday, April 26 by

"Seriously, any spare change you have. Just trying to get a bite to eat."Warner Bros. and DC Comics are developing a traveling show for the kids tentatively titled, "Batman Live." Alan Burnett, who is a veteran of "Batman: The Animated Series," will write the script which will include numerous villians, though no plot specifics have been unveiled beyond the usual "millionaire beats up the mentally-ill" framework. It's said the show may premiere in 2011 or wait to capitalize on the buzz of Christopher Nolan's third Batman film in 2012.Personally, I'm happy to see Batman "pulling a Conan" and taking his show on the road. I never approved of the way Six Flags Great Adventure replaced him with the Penguin to host The Batman Stunt Show. I'm with Batman. (THR)

Conan & Jim Carrey Sing “Superman”

Monday, April 26 by

Last night thousands of Coco fans gathered at the Gibson Amphitheater in Universal City, CA to witness the red-headed former "Tonight Show" host do whatever he wanted for a couple…

‘Final Destination 5′ Goes Through the Motions of Hiring a Writer

Monday, April 26 by

Last summer's The Final Destination was intended to be the last film in the franchise until someone realized they forgot to include laser-eye surgery. And thus, The Final Destination 5 in 3D will breeze into theaters next year, knock over some paint thinner and cause a huge fire in the process.Eric Heisserer (Elm Street remake, The Thing prequel) has been hired to write the script. Plot specifics are not known at this time but it is said that New Line is looking to break out of the repetition of the previous entries. I'll keep you posted when the entirely new, totally retarded plot contrivances are announced. (THR)

Is ‘District 10′ Filming This Fall?

Sunday, April 25 by

Break open a celebratory tin of cat food! A source at Weta has told MarketSaw that a sequel to District 9 is in pre-production and will go before cameras this October. Peter Jackson will once again produce with Neill Blomkamp back in the director's chair. There's no word yet about the plot or the title of the sequel. Though my well-placed sources (who wish to remain anonymous) tell me they may involve an Electric Boogaloo.

The Last ‘The Last Airbender’ Trailer

Saturday, April 24 by

Look, I'm in a box. The fourth and final trailer for M. Night Shyamalan's The Last Airbender has rained down all over our faces and minds and Hush Puppies. It's quite a bit more impressive than previous trailers and that mostly has to do with the addition of dragons. Like every other movie being released in the near future, The Last Airbender is being converted to 3D so that you can enjoy all the earth, wind, and fire right up in your face. I hope they play "September" by those guys on the soundtrack. That song is always fun to stumble around to when you're drunk at a wedding. Check out the trailer after the jump. The Last Airbender blows into theaters July 2.

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15 Best Examples of The Xzibit Meme

Saturday, April 24 by

Yo Dawg, we heard you like memes and galleries, so we put a whole bunch of Yo Dawg memes from YoDawgYo and other galleries into one Yo Dawg meme gallery of the best Yo Dawg memes.

Photobomb Fridays: ‘Ghostbusters 2′ + Kitten

Friday, April 23 by

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Win Jacques d’Azure’s Place at Cannes

Friday, April 23 by

A few weeks ago we reported to you that Jacques d'Azur, the King of Cannes, went missing. Mr. d'Azur is now presumed dead, or lost forever on an island inhabited entirely by beautiful women, and the search is on to find his heir. This lucky person will fill in for Jacques at the 2010 Cannes Film Festival — an exclusive VIP trip of a lifetime worth of $10,000. You'll get the very same treatment that Jacques would have. That includes the premieres, the parties, the limos, the helicopter pads, and hobnobbing with A-List celebrities. This swanky trip is sponsored by Stella Artois 4%, so head on over to their site for complete details and to enter. You could be on a jet to the French Riviera before you know it. It's good to be the king. HURRY! CONTEST ENDS SUNDAY!

Paramount Pays Sacha Baron Cohen With Goats

Friday, April 23 by

Paramount has won the rights to Sacha Baron Cohen's next comedy film after sending goats to the actor and his reps. That's right. Goats. They also gave him $20 million against 20% of the first-dollar gross. Which means he could stand to earn.. umm…. uh…. carry the one…consult with Clippy…. uh…. a lot of money. So that helped to seal the deal too.The film will star Cohen in a dual role, playing two characters we've yet to see. One is a goat herder and the other a deposed dictator who gets stuck in America. But back to the goats. Deadline reports, "visitors to WME were greeted by a goat wandering across the 3rd floor atrium — that is, until Ari Emanuel had the goat removed after it took a dump in the hallway."No fair. Brett Ratner dumps in that hallway all the time and he's still allowed to make deals.

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