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Kevin Smith Will Shoot ‘Red State’ In Secret

Wednesday, July 7 by

After a string of box office failures, Kevin Smith finds a successful second career as a mime.Don't expect to hear too much about Kevin Smith's Red State. Spurned by the media coverage caused by Southwest's no fatties policy, the director has decided to make his Fred Phelps-inspired genre-bending horror film quietly with no major announcements to the press. He'd also like to stay away from casting big names for the project, and focus more on the difficult task of casting well-known unknowns. This where story am confusing. Explain me Kevin, Smith.“For the first time since "Clerks" I’m trying to go, not unknown, but actors who aren’t like, you’re gonna see them on screen and not know their name…it’s a weird kind of in between neither place that I’m reaching for. It’s not complete unknown and it’s not remotely f*cking recognizable, name recognizable…It’s really tough to find actors whose name you don’t know. You know you can go to "Law and Order" and grab anybody from the cast and they’ve done five or six episodes and sh*t but you’d still recognize them and you’d be watching the movie and be like “that’s that dude, I’ve seen that dude on "Law and Order!” “Huh? So, he's making a "Law & Order" movie? Without Sam Waterston? What's going on here? Did you catch all that Britney??(Collider)

M. Night Shyamalan is Officially Box Office Poison

Wednesday, July 7 by

M. Night Shyamalan's string of box-office failures has finally caught up with him. With the critical and financial debacle known as The Last Airbender dying a slow, painful death in theaters, Universal is seeking to distance its upcoming project, The Night Chronicles: Devil, from the director. Universal has decided to tweak the title a bit to something less … attributed to. According to Box Office Mojo the film will now be known simply as Devil. A safe move considering the crap The Last Airbender has been getting from critics and fans alike. While renaming the film is a great idea, I'm not sure it's going to fool everyone. Instead of Devil, maybe they should have went with The First Water Straightener or Not an M. Night Shyamalan Movie, just to be sure. (DreadCentral)

‘Machete’ Trailer Remade with Legos

Wednesday, July 7 by

Sí se puede…make an awesome Lego trailer.Outside of Hobo with a Shotgun, Machete might be the greatest trailer ever made. But even the best wasn't good enough for filmmaker David Vann, who decided to improve upon perfection by doing a scene-for-scene remake of the trailer using Legos. Needless to say, it's awesome. Even in Lego form, Danny Trejo is a terrifying man. (CinemaBlend) Watch the Lego version of Machete after the jump.

‘The Green Hornet’ International Trailer

Wednesday, July 7 by

If you liked the domestic trailer for The Green Hornet, you'll love the new international trailer. It's basically the same as the domestic, except all references to freedom and democracy have been removed. The same goes for the scene where Seth Rogen wraps himself in an American flag and takes a dump on a map of the world. Other than that, it's pretty much the same.Watch the international trailer for the The Green Hornet after the jump.

‘The Sorcerer’s Apprentice’ Actress Monica Bellucci

Tuesday, July 6 by

        

‘Twilight’ for Guys

Tuesday, July 6 by

Twilight: For Guys – Watch more Funny Videos Twilight…. For Guys!!! – Watch more horror  Twilight for Guys improves on The Twilight Saga's formula by swapping out brooding teenagers with chesty, kissing lesbians. Sometimes you have to alienate the tweens to gain the horny male demographic. Check out this hot link-on-link action. How Mel Gibson And Tom Cruise Can Still Save Their Careers (Moviefone) Sex Tips From Olivia Munn (Asylum) Prince Hates iTunes, Says 'Internet Is Completely Over' (PopEater) Nobody Knows What's Up With 'Scream 4' (FilmDrunk) 8 Pictures of Mel Gibson Keeping The Black Man Down (HolyTaco) Fear And Loathing In Sesame Street (Unreality) Porn Star Promises Naughty Things For Holland To Win World Cup (BroBible) Larissa Riquelme Will Strip Even Though Paraguay Lost (TotalProSports) 10 Greatest Fat-Ass Athletes Of All Time (Maxim) Japanese MMA Is F'ed Up (CagePotato) Lindsay Lohan Corrupted By Lesbian Jews (CelebJihad) What The F**k Is Fushigi? (Smosh) In Dreams You're Mine (Pajiba) Stripper Hero Video Game For Kids (Atom) Lance Armstrong's $15,000 Custom Helmet (MadeMan) 25 People Who Should Not Be Mooning (Regretful Morning)

‘Twilight’ Lead Mofos Gettin’ Paid As Such

Tuesday, July 6 by

Good news everybody!! In forty years when we're all greeting the chubby masses at Wal-Mart because there's no money left for Social Security payouts, we can at least sleep peacefully knowing that the Twilight leads/murderers are living more than comfortably. Kristen Stewart, Robert Pattinson, and Taylor Lautner will be paid $41 million to mumble their way through The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn. That breaks down to $25 million upfront plus 7.5 percent of the gross revenue. Multiply that by the fact that the gross is a f*ckload and you've got MO' MONEY! MO' MONEY!! MO' MONEY!!! That's solid arithmetic so don't even reach for your calculator.But, you know what? They've earned it. They put their privacy and safety in harms way on a daily basis. Bless those marble-mouthed youngsters and their chiseled stomachs. Now if you'll excuse me. The car I live in is being towed. Time to turn on the waterworks. (/Film)

Thomas Lennon & Ben Garant Review ‘Reno 911′ Porn Parody

Tuesday, July 6 by

"Reno 911" stars Thomas Lennon and Ben Garant took the time to sit down and review the porn parody of their popular Comedy Central show. Their ultimate conclusion is there's a lot more stuff in the XXX version that you can masturbate to. I hadn't ever seen the "Reno 911" porn before, so I was surprised at how well Sexy Dangle impersonates (Not Sexy?) Dangle. It's like he's really trying, which is both commendable and sad. Maybe the day will come when not all of his sketches end in a c*m shot.  Check out the video review after the jump.

Roger L. Jackson Returning as Ghostface’s Voice in ‘Scream 4′

Tuesday, July 6 by

In today's edition of No Sh*t, Sherlock News, Roger L. Jackson, the actor who provided the voice of Ghostface killer, not rapper Ghostface Killah, in the previous Scream movies is returning for Scream 4. He pushed "staring into the abyss" two months and now there's an opening in his schedule. Jackson proclaimed in his normal voice:“It’s a lot of fun, I love the work! It’s going to be a great horror sequel.”So there you have it, the guy who does the voice of Ghostface says not to worry about all the rewrites and recasting that is going on with Scream 4, it's going to be a great horror sequel. He's elated the gang could get back together so he can continue to shake off the stink of being the voice of Skeet Ulrich. (CinemaBlend)

‘Bond 23′ Is Canceled

Tuesday, July 6 by

Our sentiments exactly.Looks like MGM's brokeassedness will cost them a lot more than just The Hobbit. The studio's historic James Bond series is also reportedly out this bitch. Production has halted on the upcoming Sam Mendes-directed Bond 23, and that it may not begin again. In fact, it could be years before we see Bond on the big screen again. Which means we'll have to spend our time mercilessly blowing up our friends with proximity mines. Which gets old after the first few hundred times. From the UK Daily Mirror:Production crew were told in April the £132million blockbuster, starring Daniel Craig, had been postponed amid “financial problems” at debt-ridden movie studio Metro-Goldwyn-Mayer, which co-funded the film.But now it has confirmed the movie has been axed – and it could be years before the secret agent with a licence to kill is back on the big screen.Bond has been MGM's golden ticket for years on end. If they can't scrape together assets to make another blockbuster, it's unlikely they'll weather this storm. Better keep those Daniel Craig popsicles in the freezer for now, lame housewives and weird dudes. They're scary collector's items now.

‘Arrested Development’ the Action Movie

Tuesday, July 6 by

Here's a quick video that turns "Arrested Development" into an action movie. Until I watched it, I didn't realize just how much fighting, shooting, and ziplining there was in the show. This could be a new direction for the feature film that will probably never get made. The Bluth family doesn't take kindly to anyone tearing them apart but themselves. Cue Buster mowing down a crowd of pedestrians.

‘The Gates’ Actress Rhona Mitra

Tuesday, July 6 by

Rhona Mitra is the girl to revive the Tomb Raider franchise for three reasons: She is British, she is a real actress unlike rumored Kim Kardashian, and she is a total bad ass babe with a gun as we've seen in Doomsday and Underworld 3. But in the meantime while studio execs ponder her boner appeal (think Hollow Man) catch her in the  summer series "The Gates" on ABC, yet another show about vampires.A word from Rhona: "I never know if I want to be running across the fields with no clothes on or sitting in the pub drinking Guinness."Either way, you sound like an alcoholic. More pics of Rhona with little clothes on after the jump.

Javier Bardem To Guest On ‘Glee’ For Some Reason

Tuesday, July 6 by

I'm not even trying anymore.Today in Cuckoo Bananas News comes word that Javier Bardem will guest star on the next season of "Glee," and apparantly it was his idea. Bardem pitched the idea to Ryan Murphy, show creator and sex-banner, while working together on the set of Eat Pray Love. He explained to Entertainment Weekly in a gravelly, seductive voice that heretofore has only existed within the lust-soaked pages of Harlequin novels:“We’re going to rock the house,” enthuses Bardem, who became an unabashed Gleek after watching the entire first season in one week. “We’re going to do some heavy metal — Spanish heavy metal, which is the worst.” Whoa, whoa, whoa, Javier. DO NOT insult the work of Brujeria. You have no idea the amount of blood, sweat, and tears that went into making "The Mexicutioner." Granted, most of it was from groupies but still….

LucasFilm Disapproves of Lightsaber That Sets Skin On Fire

Tuesday, July 6 by

Wicked Lasers designed a blue laser called the Spyder III Pro Arctic that looks an awful lot like a lightsaber. It has the ability to kill people, and LucasFilm has a problem with that. Even the warning on the product itself basically says not to turn the thing on: Warning: Extremely dangerous is an understatement to the power of 1W of laser power. It will blind permanently and instantly and set fire quickly to skin and other body parts, use with extreme caution and only when using the included eye protection. Customers will be required to completely read and agree to our Class IV Laser Hazard Acknowledgment Form. It doesn't get more metal than setting fire to skin and other body parts. Do they mean body parts not covered by skin? What kind of creature is handling these miracles of modern science? Apparently those pussies at LucasFilm can't handle the shear awesomeness of death lasers: It has come to our attention that a company called Wicked Lasers is selling a highly dangerous product out of Hong Kong that is designed to look like a lightsaber from Star Wars. This product is not licensed or approved by Lucasfilm in any way. We have demanded that Wicked Lasers immediately cease and desist their infringing activities. As Wicked Lasers itself admits, this product can cause serious injury to the user and other people. We strongly discourage consumers from purchasing it. I guess I get it. Someone sells a product that resembles a cherished icon from your landmark films, and said product sets some kid on fire, you might wind up with egg on your face. But it's awesome blue egg that emits a 445nm ultra high power 1W beam which appears up to 4000% brighter than the Sonar's 405nm violet beam!  Check out video of the Spyder III after the jump…

The Predator History of the World

Tuesday, July 6 by

Very rudely, the Predator race has used the planet as their personal playground without so much as a tip of the hat.This year, they're back, and they're taking some of us with them back to their personal game reserve. I may sound bitter, and that's probably unfair to the Predators. Actually, they've been integral to world history, as I've wanted to showcase. Thanks for the pyramids, you greedy, trigger-happy jerks!

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