‘True Blood’ Recap: 9 Crimes S3E4

Monday, July 12 by

Two weeks ago on "True Blood": Another body showed up, head missing. Sookie went to a werewolf bar with a cool werewolf (Alcide). Bill agreed to help the King of Mississippi screw over the Queen of Louisiana. Sam's redneck family got plastered on chick drinks at his bar. Jason contemplated a career in law enforcement. Tara f*cked the mysterious new vampire in town (Frank). Frank blackmailed Jess. Sam's brother tried to rob him. Bill mutilated Lorena's body while he fucked her in some weird-ass kinky vampire sex. This week starts with Sookie cleaning Alcide's wounds. He whines. She flirts. Bill calls. He's like, "Sookah, I can no longah handle the gap in your teeth. We’re through." Lorena is smirking in the background, so unfortunately she survived Bill's hate f*ck.MORE AFTER THE JUMP…

Thomas the Tank Engine Speaks the Truth

Monday, July 12 by

So inappropriate for a little kid. It's three sizes too big.

Roman Polanski Is A Free Man

Monday, July 12 by

Check out "Cool Dad."Phew! Looks like we'll get a sequel to The Ghost Writer afterall. That was a close one. Government officials in Switzerland have decided to free Roman Polanski after seven months of house arrest. The Swiss had planned to expedite the famed director to the U.S. where he would serve a prison sentence for drugging and raping a 13-year old girl in 1977, but have now declined to do so because of a fault in America's application for his extradition.Great. Way to drop the ball, guys. There's no way he's going to fall for the whole we want to give you a lifetime achievement award again. Now our only option for capturing him is to dress Dog the Bounty Hunter as a schoolgirl, and drop him in the Alps. It's a crazy plan, but right crazy is the best hope we've got. (NY Times)

‘The Hunchback of Notre Dame’ to Bring Cripple Action/Comedy to the Forefront

Monday, July 12 by

Paramount has snatched up an untitled pitch that turns Victor Hugo's classic "The Hunchback of Notre Dame" into an action/comedy. The novel, published in 1831, "is set in the 15th century and centers on the tragic romance between Quasimodo, the deformed bell-ringer of the Notre Dame cathedral in Paris, and the gypsy woman Esmeralda."Disney already brought cripples to children's attention with the animated version of The Hunchback in 1996. Not only did Quasi land the girl, but he had a voice like a nightingale. In an action/comedy take, the pairing of "deformed bell-ringer and gypsy" will be the new "criminal disguised as cop and cop in need of making a big case." They should just remake Blue Streak instead. It's been eleven years already. (Variety)   

‘The Sorcerer’s Apprentice’ Actress Monica Bellucci

Monday, July 12 by

Monica Bellucci has been the gorgous Italian babe to haunt many of mens' dreams ever since sucking Keanu Reeves's blood in Bram Stoker's Dracula. Catch her in the upcoming Disney flick The Sorcerer's Apprentice playing a sexy sorceress that will move the next generation of young men to puberty.A word from Monica: "My body is so important to me… I use everything I have."Your body is so important to us too. We'd like to run a diagnostic test if possible.  More examples of why I love Italy so darn much after the jump.

‘Transformers 3′ Chicago Set Pics and Video

Monday, July 12 by

I believe the first part.Michael Bay is delivering his wrath upon Chi-Town. The Chicago Tribune put together an extensive gallery of pics from the set of Transformers 3, which is currently filming around LaSalle Street in downtown Chicago. The term "Windy City" gets a whole new meaning as natural gusts are replaced with violent releases of pressure from the many explosions Bay will set off around the area. Some are for the movie, others are just for shits and giggles.Check out video and more pics from the set after the jump… 

David Gordon Green’s ‘Barefoot Bandit’ Now Has A Third Act

Monday, July 12 by

When David Gordon Green picked up the rights to Taking Flight: The Hunt For A Young Outlaw, it was uncertain how the story would end. As of today, we have that resolution. After a three year manhunt, Colton Harris-Moore was finally captured by police in the Bahamas after stealing a plane, crashing it, leading authorites on a high-speed boat chase, before engaging them in a shoot out. How metal is this kid? I wouldn't be surprised if he somehow escaped by switching faces with a federal agent.No word yet on who will play Harris-Moore aka The Barefoot Bandit aka The Shoeless Asshole in Green's adaptation, but we'll keep you posted when Danny McBride, Adam Scott, Aziz Ansari, James Franco, Will Ferrell, and Nicolas Cage inevitably join the cast. (AFP)

Interview With JB Smoove

Monday, July 12 by

The other day I had the opportunity to speak with comedian and actor JB Smoove about his current and upcoming projects, his unique approach to stand-up comedy, and a way…

Luke Wilson Brings Even More Joy To Trillions in RED BAND ‘Middle Men’ Trailer

Monday, July 12 by

No shoes on the couch please. Here's a sexier, red bandier look at George Gallo's Middle Men. I'm guessing this trailer exists for anyone skeptical that the movie would feature F-bombs and boobies. Upon reviewing this footage, I can say it most certainly does. As well as some housewives with bigger things on their minds than light dusting. And perhaps hottest of all, Kevin… Pollak… FAPPING. Now that I've piqued your desire to a fever pitch, I won't waste anymore of your time with words. ON TO THE SWEET, SWEET IMAGES AFTER THE JUMP…

Hulk Smashed? Joaquin Phoenix May Replace Norton in ‘The Avengers’

Monday, July 12 by

Here's a rumor from the "so stupid it might be true" department. “Reliable sources” are claiming that rapper Joaquin Phoenix, who actually started out as an actor, may replace Ed Norton as the Incredible Hulk in The Avengers.On Friday, Marvel started a war of words, claiming that it dropped Norton from the project in order to find "an actor who embodies the creativity and collaborative spirit of our other talented cast members.” Given that description, is Joaquin Phoenix really the guy you want?Don't get me wrong; I don't doubt the creativity of a man who's spent the past year looking like a drug-addled version of Judge Roy Bean. But considering he can barely make it through a one-on-one interview with David Letterman, does Phoenix really "embody" the "collaborative spirit" you're looking for? Well, does it, Marvel? ANSWER ME? (Cinema Blend)

Catfight! Edward Norton’s Agent Hits Back at Marvel

Monday, July 12 by

Meeee-ow! Looks like we've got ourselves a good old-fashioned catfight! Except instead of two hot women scratching and clawing, we've got an agent from William Morris pissing and moaning about some dork at a comic book company. Actually, that doesn't sound like a catfight at all. It sounds a whole lot sexier! On Friday, Marvel announced that Edward Norton, who clashed with the studio during the making of The Incredible Hulk, will not be part of The Avengers. The press release stated that the decision was not monitary, but was instead “rooted in the need for an actor who embodies the creativity and collaborative spirit of our other talented cast members.” For those of you who don't speak Hollywood, that roughly translates to "go f**k yourself, you insufferable twit." Not one to take things lying down, Norton responded like any other red-blooded male, and quickly had his agent, Brian Swardstrom, issue a strongly worded rebuttal. Swardstrom attacked Marvel head on, using big words like defamatory, mean spirited and accusatory. That's right, accusatory! I haven't seen a war of words like this since Biggie and Tupac. If cooler heads don't prevail, I fear someone might get their glasses broken, or maybe even work themselves up into an asthmatic frenzy. (Collider) Read the strongly worded letter from Edward Norton's agent in its entirety after the jump.

JJ Abrams Takes Meeting to Discuss ‘Wicked’ Film Adaptation

Sunday, July 11 by

Seeing dollar signs in all things faaaaaaabulous, Universal is moving forward with a film adaptation of the Broadway musical hit Wicked. The movie will take the Wicked Witch of the West back to high school, where she is terrorized by the popular Glinda the Good Witch.The studio is taking meetings with a few directors, ranging from the awesome to the willing to make this kind of movie. First up, The potential directors are JJ Abrams, James Mangold, Rob Marshall, and "Glee's" Ryan Murphy. I really don't see Abrams hopping aboard this one due to his busy schedule of not sucking. The other three seem more well-suited for the material, given their experience with bringing musicals to film. I did notice that Universal has seemed to overlook Adam Shankman. He's probably sitting somewhere crying his eyes out over this snub. But in all fairness, he cries while watching "The Bachelorette." (Deadline)

Cartoon Supervillain Defeats Vampires, Werewolves and Predators

Sunday, July 11 by

A cartoon supervillain easily defeated all challengers in this weekend's box office showdown, making short work of vampires, werewolves and even alien predators.Despicable Me dominated, pulling in $60.1 million from 3,476 theaters. In its second weekend, The Twilight Saga: Eclipse brought in an impressive $33.4 million, taking second place, while Predators came in third, taking in $25.3 million during its big-screen début.Typical. This could only happen in Hollywood. In real life, the Predators would easily destroy everything in their path, and the vampires and werewolves would have no problem with a cartoon supervillain. It wouldn't even be close. Now if you'll excuse me, mother needs to check my browser history to make sure I haven't been looking at pictures of naked women. As if! (Coming Soon)


Fright Night

Sunday, July 11 by

Director: Craig Gillespie Cast: Colin Farrell, Anton Yelchin, Toni ColletteSynopsis: A charismatic vampire tries to convince his film obsessed neighbor that he is a vampire who has come to suck as much blood as he can, thereby eradicating plenty of human life.

Comic-Con 2010 Saturday Schedule

Saturday, July 10 by

Holy crap, Saturday is jam-packed. Thursday and Friday are bringing the events as well, but Saturday makes them look like booths at an interior designer convention. We're talking Green Lantern, Captain America: The First Avenger, Thor, Sucker Punch, Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, Let Me In, Resident Evil Afterlife, Paul, Cowboys & Aliens, and on the TV side, "Futurama," "The Simpsons," "Community," "Family Guy," and "LOST" for some reason. I'm going to have to find a secret nook in Hall H to avoid the madness of standing in line. I'm not saying I'll be inside the baby grand piano, but just don't look there.Check out the Saturday highlights after the jump.