News - Page 83

Somewhere, somebody is getting this tattooed on them.
‘The Expendables 2′ Poster Features All Your Favorite Tough Old Guys
Monday, November 21 by

That’s a lot of old man strength.

got-season2
HBO Reminds Us That ‘Game Of Thrones’ Season Two Will Rule
Monday, November 21 by

So many new characters. I’m already dizzy.

I've made a huge mistake...by signing up for Hulu Plus.
Want More ‘Arrested Development’? You Better Get Netflix
Friday, November 18 by

It’s time to take back all those bad things you said about Netflix.

The seventh season will be documentary-style footage of him playing with action figures.
Beware, Evildoers: ‘Dexter’ Renewed For Two More Seasons
Friday, November 18 by

By the time we reach season eight, it will just be Dexter sitting in a room having a dinner party with six ghosts.

This, ladies and gentlemen, is my 'Twilight'.
‘Rampage’ Video Game To Become A Real Thinkpiece Film
Friday, November 18 by

They get their strength from eating people. Just like I do.

Who wouldn't want to watch this?
Fox Swats Down David Cronenberg’s ‘The Fly’ Sequel
Friday, November 18 by

Who wouldn’t want to watch this?

She's hired.
Yvonne Strahovski Seductively Crawls Toward ‘I, Frankenstein’
Friday, November 18 by

If she’ll sleep with Chuck, she’ll sleep with Frankenstein’s monster.

I felt sorry for them until I saw that he got married in that hat.
Ashton Kutcher And Demi Moore To Div…ZZZZZZ
Thursday, November 17 by

Ashton will retain sole custody of his spotty facial hair.

Oh, man! They're gonna remake 'The Munsters'? This is gonna be so classic!!!!
NBC Now Thinks People Will Like ‘The Munsters’ More Than ‘Community’
Thursday, November 17 by

They’re hoping it lasts at least as long as the ‘Charlie’s Angels’ remake does.

Get ready to hate and resent him.
‘Despicable Me’ Animators Chipping Away At ‘Woody Woodpecker’
Thursday, November 17 by

Sell out.

This year, Gervais will tell his meanest jokes via a Beaver puppet.
They Like A Little Abuse: Ricky Gervais Back To Host Golden Globes
Thursday, November 17 by

Gervais breaks his two seasons is enough rule.

Rob Schneider has plenty of booze back at his place if you girls wanna join him.
Rob Schneider To Address Exclamation Point-Inversion Epidemic With ‘┬íRob!’
Wednesday, November 16 by

Let this be the news that signified Rob Schneider’s career had superseded Adam Sandler’s, never to be overtaken again.

To Troll A Predator
The Best Of ‘To Troll A Predator’ (By ‘Best’ I Mean All The Vids I Could Find)
Wednesday, November 16 by

This is how they do justice in Canada.

Ironically, I bet these superhero kids probably really turn pedophiles on.
Fake Canadian Superheroes Targeting Pedophiles Via YouTube (No, Really)
Wednesday, November 16 by

This is just really awesome. The costumes, the deception…everything.

"C'mon, Eileen. WHOOOAAA. You know what I mean..."
‘Game of Thrones’ Season Two Crowns Its Lord Of Bones
Wednesday, November 16 by

He sounds far too scary to make wiener jokes about.

It won't be on during the day, because that's when Americans should be working. With their jobs.
5 Possible Premises For Glenn Beck’s New Animated Series
Tuesday, November 15 by

No one makes me laugh like Glenn Beck does.

Who would have thought this ham-fisted toddler comedy would have ever played outside the Borscht Belt? Not me.
Armond White Thought ‘Jack And Jill’ Was Just Great, Thank You
Tuesday, November 15 by

He also thought the war in Iraq was our nation’s finest hour and P.F. Chang’s has pretty authentic Chinese food.

Umm... behind you, bro.
‘The Walking Dead’s’ Jon Bernthal Agrees To ‘Snitch’
Tuesday, November 15 by

Walking dead men tell no tales.

Black magic.
What Is A ‘Magical Negro’ And Why Are They In So Many Films?
Tuesday, November 15 by

If these guys were actually around, maybe I wouldn’t keep screwing up my life.

Not dead yet.
Don’t Panic: ‘Community’ Is Not Dead… Yet
Monday, November 14 by

The show will not be returning in January… at least not right away.

We meant a computer virus, but I wouldn't rule out the regular kind.
Nude ‘Twilight’ Stars Taylor Lautner, Kristen Stewart Will Give You A Virus
Monday, November 14 by

We meant a computer virus, but I wouldn’t rule out the regular kind.

The president might want his new girlfriend to get tested.
The President Is Going To Steal Russell Brand’s Girlfriend!
Monday, November 14 by

This would likely hurt the president’s approval ratings.

This makes money.
Why Adam Sandler Makes Sh*tty Movies (Infographic)
Monday, November 14 by

The answer is in your wallet…and it’s not a really old condom.

How do you challenge my reality, Lego Man?
Warner Bros. Lego Movie Really Coming Together
Monday, November 14 by

Everything is snapping into place.

"Django's wife...she's BOH-ring!" Shit. That's not gonna read at all in print.
Sacha Baron Cohen Also Joining Tarantino’s ‘Django’?
Friday, November 11 by

He’s going to buy Django’s wife wIth no repercussions at all, I presume.

Ash battles the Close Talker.
Bruce Campbell Acknowledges He’s Irreplaceable
Friday, November 11 by

No one else is fit to wield his chainsaw.

Muslims finally figured out that the way to be treated with kindness and respect is to appear on a reality show.
TLC Takes Spectacle Television To New Heights With ‘All-American Muslim’
Friday, November 11 by

They opted out of the working title ‘Look At These Weird Muslims!’

He's scary, but not in a conventional way.
David Schwimmer Will Be Playing A Mob Hitman In ‘The Iceman’… Seriously.
Friday, November 11 by

He bores his victims to death.

Frieida Pinto Isn't Topless, uses a body double
Bad News: Freida Pinto Isn’t Really Nude In ‘Immortals’
Thursday, November 10 by

But SOMEONE is!

"Seriously, where is my car?"
Ashton Kutcher’s Sorry For Being So Dumb
Thursday, November 10 by

He’s owned up to it.