News - Page 332

Jack Bauer Is Coming Back Link Dump
Wednesday, October 29 by

One of the main reasons that the world has been in economic turmoil is because Jack Bauer has been hiding somewhere, not taking things to the limit to protect all of us from dangerous things like terrorists and angry dogs.  I look forward to January when he is BACK in action and and all the jobs come back to AMERICA where they are safe.

Seth Rogen On Leno
Wednesday, October 29 by

I really can’t tell how much of the controversy surrounding Zack And Miri was real versus made up by the studio to promote the film. Either way, Seth makes some great points about the whole issue.

Don’t Vote
Wednesday, October 29 by

Guys, I can NOT express how important it is for you to get out there and NOT vote this election. Voting is the reason that the economy is in shambles. Voting is what killed Heath Ledger. Voting was the associate producer of Beverly Hills Chihuahua.  Only you as an indivdual have the power to prevent these things from ever happening again.

Simpsons Spoof Mad Men Intro
Wednesday, October 29 by

This is probably the best thing that The Simpsons has done in a long time.  This is from the forthcoming 19th installment of the 'Treehouse of Horror.' Does that make you feel old?

Morning News Roundup
Wednesday, October 29 by

I’m sorry to startle everyone this early. But it looks like…wait, are you sitting down? You should be, because you are using a computer. Nobody stands at a computer. Maybe scientists?  Anyway, looks like Joaquin Phoenix is going to quit acting. To work on his music.  Great move buddy.

Underworld: Rise of the Lycans
Tuesday, October 28 by

Lycans, aka werewolves with "enhanced strength, speed and regeneration abilities", are revolting against their discriminatory vampire masters in this the third installment of the Underworld series.  It explores the origins of the age old monster rivalry between vamps and Lycans, with a vampire babe and all out rumbles to the death. 

Born Again To Kick Ass Links
Tuesday, October 28 by

You don’t mess with the Kung Fu Jesus. You just dont. That’s all, my disciples. Here are thine links. Click of them how you will. Now go forth and be bountiful in your mention of our hallowed site, and spread the word of Junkies.

Slumdog Milionaire Teaser
Tuesday, October 28 by

Looks like this one is going to be a bullet for this year’s Oscars, or so says the blogosphere.

A Flaw In The Model Of How The World Works
Tuesday, October 28 by

Ok. Not sure how many Jr. Economists we have in our readership. Or even advanced free market theorists.  But when the big Alan G speaks, the world listens. And what did he say this time?

Dear Reader: Changes Are Afoot
Tuesday, October 28 by

Times are tough. Luckily the Juggernaut that is Screenjunkies has remained relatively unaffected.  You might have noticed some interruption in content lately like missing movie reviews and TV recaps.  This was due in most part to a move from our old headquarters in Dubai to our new offices just outside of Missoula, Montana. 

Morning News Roundup: Florida Leans Left
Tuesday, October 28 by

People, we live in strange times.  Florida is leaning toward voting a black man into the oval office. The economy finally said “Oh, I got you GOOD BITCHES! Earnings? Whatever!”  And it looks like Paramount is fast tracking the new Footloose. I pray every night that they name it Footlooser. And every morning, we put the news together for you. 

Link Dump With Don Draper
Monday, October 27 by

His name alone drops panties from the pools of Palm Springs to the board rooms of Madison Avenue. He is Don Draper, and reasons for his success can be found in the above video. They are simple. And these are his preferred links.

Monday Mashup: House Of 1000 Muppets
Monday, October 27 by

We’re trying to at least keep it sort of Halloween up in this bitch. And what better way than this selection for our weekly mashup. Not only is it thematically relevant, its technically superb and goddamn funny. Mwwwwwaaaaa haaaa haaaaa haaaaaa etc.

Giant Freaking Guinea Pigs
Monday, October 27 by

I never saw Cloverfield because I heard that people were totally vomiting in the theatre. And whenever I smell vomit, it makes me want to vomit.  Now having seen this South Park clip, I feel like I’ve seen the movie. Awesome.

Morning News Roundup
Monday, October 27 by

Monday Morning. A time for reflection. A time too look back over the weekend and wonder if you made all the right moves, if you did your best keg stand and provided reliable wingman services for your bros. A time for the morning links.

UFC Saturday Night Man Dance
Sunday, October 26 by

Ben over at CAGEPOTATO.COM has some coverage of last night's UFC fight. I love the way that Bruce Buffer has to rattle off all of the advertiser blurbs before this main event.

The Notorious L.I.N.K.
Friday, October 24 by

I was thinking about how it’s going to be lame that I have to spend all my weekend moving. Then I saw this new trailer for Notorious and I was reminded how lucky I am not to be a fat dead rapper who doesn’t even get to move into a new apartment because they are dead. Time to start drinking. Here are your links.

If Game Shows Were Made For Animals
Friday, October 24 by

This is a post from Holy Taco. Click on the image for the full version. So genius.

Will Ferrell On SNL Is Awesome
Friday, October 24 by

Will Ferrell’s impersonation of bush is not the best, but it is the most hilarious.  The writing is great on this one, seriously. I've been really impressed this season. Now I'm going to go have three Xanex and a Silver Bullet. God Bless America.

Morning News Roundup
Friday, October 24 by

Last night I had one too many Jamesons. I turned on the TV and watched about five minutes of the Chris Rock special on HBO on demand. Then I started packing up the apartment because my girlfriend and I are moving. Are you thrilled? Here’s the morning news, Junkie.

Thusday’s Links Are Complete Panda-Monium
Thursday, October 23 by

I always figured that the reason tiny animals make you feel good is that if they made you feel bad, there would be a much greater chance of you eating them, and much lesser chance of species actually surviving. Here’s the links.

Soup Clip Of The Week: Manhole Tragedy
Thursday, October 23 by

I put this in our link dump yesterday. But it makes me laugh so hard that I decided that it merits a spot on the homepage. Manhole. 69. Straight face. God bless local news, and the stuff they just don’t catch.

Child Bankrupts Make A Wish Foundation
Thursday, October 23 by

Stupid Chad Carter with his stupid Leukemia, bankrupting the Make A Wish Foundation with his usage of bureaucratic loopholes.  Makes me SO mad. PS, I know I posted an Onion video yesterday. But hells bells they’re on top of their game.

Morning News Roundup
Thursday, October 23 by

Good morning. How'd you sleep? The entire staff of Screenjunkies stayed up last night and broke into a zoo. We have brand new mascots for the site. Here's the morning news roundup while we figure out what to feed a sloth. 

Hump Day Link Dump: Now With Crazy Cosby
Wednesday, October 22 by

It's not totally clear what the hell he's talking about in this clip, but one this is for sure. Bill Cosby is almost 400 years younger then John McCain. Put that on your shuffleboard court and shove it.

Woody Allen Meets Sarah Palin
Wednesday, October 22 by

I feel like even acknowledging Palin’s existence only serves to feed the publicity machine that has rocketed her to being the most popular woman on earth. But I also feel like it’s that same publicity machine that is just about to grind her into a fine mash of Alaskan Moose Pemmican.

Disney Grows Kids In Labs
Wednesday, October 22 by

The Onion continues to just destroy the world with funniness.  They are our truest national hero. God bless them.

Groundhogs Day B&B Now A Real Thing
Wednesday, October 22 by

Some day in the not too distant future we will live in a world where our most important historical figures will be the cast of movies like Ghostbusters and Back To The Future. You will be able to visit the highway rest stop in your car (your Jet Car) on the Mass Pike (the Mass Jet Pike) where Dan Aykroyd dropped a duce. That day is drawing nearer as the house featured in Groundhogs Day is now a functioning locale of movie history.

The Link Dump: Things Happen
Tuesday, October 21 by

Lots of things happen. Things are always happening. They happen all over the world, to people, to animals, to plants even. Here are some things that happened in movies and tv that I didn't write about today.

Almost Transformers Are Amazing
Tuesday, October 21 by

This one is pure brilliance from the Aussie comedy Duo Merrick and Rosso.  I’m a sucker for 1) candid camera shows, 2) low budget interpretations of big budget things 3) boobies. This video really only has the first two. But damn is it funny.  The best part is that every time they switch from being a washing machine or a fridge to being a human, they yell TRANSFORM! Awesome.