News - Page 328

10 SEXIEST DAMSELS IN DISTRESS ON FILM
Monday, March 23 by

This Friday, John Cena's gonna be kickin' ass, takin' names, breakin' necks and maybe cashin' checks if 12 Rounds doesn't gets squashed by the competish.  Why is Mr. Cena so riled up?  Well, in 12 Rounds, he's gotta go all Wrestlemania twelve times over to get back his girlfriend, Molly Porter (Ashley Scott) from the clutches of vengeful douchebag Miles Jackson (Aidan Gillen).  Ahhh, the old Damsel in Distress blunder.  Don't these bad guys ever learn?  Nothing gets under a hero's skin worse than his leading lady getting bogarted by some goon. 

Battlestar Who? Clips From Caprica Hit the NET
Monday, March 23 by

Well, Battlestar Galactica is over and done with (read Jim Connelly's tear-jerking eulogy here), but Universal and the newly re-branded Syfy Network have already begun bombarding us with shrapnel made in Caprica.  Here's one of the clips.  Check out the other six after the jump!

Colbert Beats Out Porn Star “Serenity” for Space Station Name
Monday, March 23 by

An Associated Press report unveiled but moments ago that TV's Stephen Colbert came in first in NASA's online contest to name a new room at the international space station.  The name "Colbert" beat out NASA's four suggested options in the space agency's effort to have the public help name the addition. The new room will be launched later this year.Of course, this is what happens when you let write-in votes count, especially when week after week, Colbert has proven that his viewers will do anything that he asks them to do, especially if it means getting something named after their idol.  [Colbert's 230,539 votes] clobbered Serenity, one of the NASA choices, by more than 40,000 votes. Nearly 1.2 million votes were cast by the time the contest ended Friday. I think Serenity is a totally serviceable name, and I think the Wicked Pictures star whose name all the NASA computer geeks threw into the hat would agree.In fact, this whole thing makes me long for the days when NASA just named their spacecraft after porn stars.

JENNIFER BEALS TRADES LESBIANS FOR LIES
Monday, March 23 by

According to EW's Michael Ausiello, Jennifer Beals – she of The L Word – has joined the cast of Fox's Lie to Me.  I have to admit I'm going to miss all those L Word billboards and print ads with Beals and the girls in suggestive, nude positions, one of which I've shamelessly posted after the jump.    

BLOOD: THE LAST VAMPIRE – FULL TRAILER!
Monday, March 23 by

ShockTilYouDrop has posted the full Japanese trailer for the live action version of Blood: The Last Vampire, complete with super slick camera moves, some questionable CG demons, Michael Bay-style explosions, a heartfland Japanese power ballad, and a gravelly-voiced Japanese announcer punctuating the trailer with a super Japanese-y recap of the title that sounds something like, "Last-oh Blut-oh!"Watch it in semi-glossy Flash after the jump-oh!

Monday TV Preview
Monday, March 23 by

While House takes a breather after the glorious 'killer kitty' episode, 24 is right on point with Bauer on the run from the Feds after being framed for two murders and killing the real culprit, but you know he ain't getting deterred by nothing from finding Jon Voight's Bioweapon! Also, catch some biblical bloodshed on Battles BC, a show that reenacts some excellent warrings from our bloodthirsty ancestors. Another Regis 'I'm a Robot' Philbin somehow appears on 2 Late Night shows tonight as well. Your preview after the break.

Top 10 Recyclable TV Characters
Monday, March 23 by

The average successful TV show has four or five seasons, a total of 80-90 episodes.  At 20 minutes an episode, that’s at least 1600 minutes of entertainment.  And that's not including the really popular ones like The Simpsons (20 years) or ER (15 years).  That’s a lot of airtime to fill…  So, once execs discover a certain kind of show is popular, half a dozen clones will pop up… staple characters are born… then die… then get reincarnated.  The circle of life on Television. Some of these recyclable characters have been around for ages, while others have just made their debut in the last ten years or so.  (And many of the shows below fall into several categories, but for the sake of variety once a show has appeared in a category it won’t appear again.)  So without further ado, Screen Junkies presents… TV’s Top Ten Recyclable Characters.   10. The Drama Queen Doctor

WATCHMEN’S BLACK FREIGHTER DROPS ANCHOR!
Monday, March 23 by

For those of you who watched the Watchmen and said to yourselves, "Self, this movie is missing something, and I think it's a whole other movie that could fit inside this movie," your ship has arrived.  Tales of the Black Freighter, the fictitious comic within Watchmen, has been turned into its own feature-length animated movie, and it's coming to DVD and Blu-Ray April 6th.  Empire posted an exclusive clip that contains some behind-the-scenes goodies and clips from the Freighter flick after the jump. Check it out after the jump.

SCREEN TEST: SLUMDOG MILLIONAIRE
Monday, March 23 by

Jai Ho, everybody!  Or maybe Jai Home Video is more like it! Slumdog Millionaire is coming to DVD & Blu-Ray on Tuesday, March 31st, and Screen Junkies is giving away a free copy.  The beauty part is that you don't have to crawl through a river of human excrement to get one – unlike brave little Jamal had to do just to get Bollywood superstar Amitabh Bachchan's autograph.

STALLONE DROPS 50 CENT FOR TERRY CREWS
Sunday, March 22 by

So, after originally reporting that thespian-rapper Curtis "50 Cent" Jackson would be playing the role of Hale Caesar in Stallone's upcoming star-studded The Expendables, Ain't It Cool News now reports that former San Diego Chargers linebacker and funnyman Terry Crews will be taking on the role. I like this choice, and not just because I know that Terry's unafraid to commit himself to a project, as he's proved by posing nude on a fur rug with only an NBA-endorsed basketball covering his unmentionables.  I also like it because Terry's performance as the President of the United States of America ("President Camacho") in Mike Judge's Idiocracy was the stuff of beauty.  Imagine President Obama channeling Camacho's words:

NEW TERMINATOR: SALVATION PICS!
Saturday, March 21 by

Columbia Pictures just released a new set of promotional photos for Terminator: Salvation.  This is looking more and more like Mad Max meets Cyberdyne, and I like it.  More photos for you to click and make all nice n' big (like the handsome one of the blow'd up T-800 exoskeleton one above) after the jump…

THE SISTERS OF SORORITY ROW
Friday, March 20 by

  The first trailer for Sorority Row, the remake of 1981’s The House on Sorority Row, is up and running…for… its… life.  Check it out, and then check out our photo gallery of all the sorority sisters after the jump.  No pressure or anything. 

THE CRITERION CASE OF BENJAMIN BUTTON
Friday, March 20 by

Cinematical's Elisabeth Rappe just announced that David Fincher's The Curious Case of Benjamin Button will forego the regular DVD release period that normal films get before being deemed a classic, in order to go straight to the gilded library of high society that is the Criterion Collection.  Don't worry, peasants.  The regular release will be available on your primitive studio-released DVD and Blu-Ray, too.  But you'll be missing out on the Two-Disc Criterion's following features:

We’ll Miss You BSG Weekend TV Preview
Friday, March 20 by

While the series finale of Battlestar Galacica may not come with such a hullabaloo as did with the Seinfeld finale, ScreenJunkies can whole heartedly gurantee you it will be a 100x more satisfying send-off. Is BSG one of the best shows in TV history? So get all your nerdlinger buddies over and throw a big viewing party with Battlestar Bento and Battlestar Cocktails and get Battlestar Drunk. BE WARNED–If you have to record it on your DVR, remember that the finale is 2 HRS and 11 MINUTES LONG. All your other favorites on schedule too (FNL, T:TSCC, BB), but dammit, if you have to watch anything this weekend, make sure it's Battlestar. Your preview after the break.

COMMANDO IS THE BEST FILM EVER, PT. 3
Friday, March 20 by

By Mark L. Lester, D.G.A.

YEAR ONE: THE FIRST FULL TRAILER!
Thursday, March 19 by

Today, Columbia Pictures released the full theatrical trailer for Year One.  We get to see Jack Black and Michael Cera leave their village, head out on a way old school road trip and run into some familiar figures along the way (like a pissy Cain and Abel played by Paul Rudd and David Cross). I'm glad that Michael Cera's getting to spread his wings at least a little bit.  He's still playing the awkward, quirky geek that we've become accustomed to, but at least he's doing it in the ancient world.  It kinda works.  Check out the trailer after the jump and tell us what you think about this Michael Cera and Jack Black epic team-up in the comments section. 

SLEEP DEALER TRAILER
Thursday, March 19 by

Sleep Dealer, from relative newbie director Alex Rivera, takes its visual cues like a westernized, live action version of some funky used-future Japanese anime flick.  Set against the backdrop of the US-Mexico border in some kind of alternate, not-so-distant future, it already seems disturbingly credible.  Don't take your border patrol friends opening night.  Check out the trailer and a more detailed plot synopsis after the jump.

Thursday TV Preview
Thursday, March 19 by

The Office and 30 Rock continue to churn some laughs out of you for yet another edition of 'Must See Thursday.' Michael gets some stiff competition from the new Vice President of Dunder Miff, and Drew makes another appearance on 30 Rock while Jack fights for Tracy to stay on with TGS. Not to be outdone is Pres. Obama, who makes an appearance on Jay Leno tonight with Garth Brooks on as the musical guest. Your preview after the break.

50 CENT JOINS STALLONE’S EXPENDABLES
Thursday, March 19 by

Yesterday evening, AICN received a letter straight from Sly Stallone himself informing them that Forest Whitaker has had to drop out of Stallone's fully loaded actioner Expendables, and will be replaced by 50 Cent.  Now, before anyone gets their camouflage panties in a bunch, keep in mind that of all the movie badasses in The Expendables, 50 is probably the only cast member ever to actually be shot.  With real bullets. Here's what the cast is shaping up to look like:

MCBRIDE, FRANCO TEAM UP FOR FANTASY EPIC!!!
Wednesday, March 18 by

Woo Hoo!  This just in from Ain't It Cool News: comedy upstart Danny McBride (The Foot Fist Way, Pineapple Express, Eastbound & Down, etc.) is signed on to star in a sprawling fantasy epic comedy, to be directed by none other than Pineapple Express's David Gordon Green.  And James Franco is apparently attached as a co-star.  I don't know about you, but I look at Danny McBride and CANNOT WAIT to see his mug on a Sword & Sorcerer-style poster. This sounds f*cking awesome.  Harry Knowles mused that it'll be Monty Python-esque.  I hope it's entirely it's own thing, and with waaaaaaay better effects than Python (because we can, now).  Spectral Motion (the guys who did the opposite of shitting the bed with the VFX in Hellboy 2 and Pan's Labyrinth) are also attached to bring this fantasy world and the creatures within to meticulously detailed life.  

MISSION: IMPOSSIBLE 4. POSSIBLE.
Wednesday, March 18 by

Earlier today, a spy for Ain't It Cool News reported that Tom Cruise is kicking around ideas for the next installment of Mission: Impossible.  He spilled the beans on the popular Japanese show "SMAP SMAP."  After spilling the beans, he apparently then baked a cake.   I waited for this to turn out to be a segment for NBC's Howie Do It, but comedian Howie Mandel didn't come out to canned applause spliced in from an earlier joke, so we have to consider it as credible. 

Wednesday TV Preview
Wednesday, March 18 by

Last night, TV took a little hiatus to toss back some car bombs and chill with his leprechaun buddies. But tonight, la Televisión is back on the wagon and on point with a tremendously enjoyable night of plane crashes, 'ScrubsCenter', Mysterio, and an explanation of coolness. A surplus of video, some solid Late Night bands 'n babes, and your Wednesday lineup after the jump.

JENNIFER ANISTON: THE NEXT BOND GIRL?
Wednesday, March 18 by

As relayed by AceShowBiz.com, Jennifer Aniston has joined Slumdog's Freida Pinto as possibilities for the new Bond girl in the series' 23rd installment.  A source from Bond's production company, EON, was quoted as saying, "We're always looking for the next Bond girl. She has to be beautiful but she also needs to have brains. It helps if she's athletic and able to keep up with the intense stunt work a Bond movie demands. Jennifer has all these qualities. It's great to hear she'd love to do a movie because we have used established actresses before such as Teri Hatcher and Denise Richards. It's great she's a fan."  It certainly makes us wonder whether Aniston's involvement would have any bearing on the role of Bond 23's villain…

COMMANDO IS THE BEST FILM EVER, PT. 1
Wednesday, March 18 by

  By Mark L. Lester, DGA Chances are, you’ve seen Commando with Arnold Schwarzenegger because it is, without a doubt, the greatest film of all time.  I should know.  I directed it. Naturally, a lot of people stop me on the street and ask, “Mark, how did you ever make a movie as great as Commando?”  I usually smile and say I just happened to be holding a bottle in the middle of a lightning storm.  They always laugh.  I bet you did, too, because you realize that this film wasn’t an accident, just like Jesus wasn't an accident.   It took real vision to pull off, starting with the theme of a parent’s love for his child, and the lengths he will go to to get her back from a wily South American dictator.  Also, it has explosions, and a rockin’ saxophone-driven soundtrack that really gets the people moving in their seats. Of course, that’s not even the half of it.  But after wrapping production on Yeti: Curse of the Snow Demon for television, I had an opportunity to reflect on what we achieved, and really figure out what makes it all so timeless.  So here I am, baring my soul to you, the adoring public, for nothing in return.  This is more than just the only film school you’ll ever need.  Think of it as a free version of The Secret.  Think of it as your all-access pass inside the Greatest Story Ever Told.  For the next three days, I will take you through Commando, my magnum opus, my gift to humanity. Let us begin with Part One. MAGIC STARTS WITH OPENING CREDITS… And so begins the ballad of John Matrix, played pitch-perfectly by Arnold Schwarzenegger.  In the opening moments, we see Arnold’s instincts from his past life as a soldier person.  Sweating, he masculinely chops wood with a hatchet, but also sneakily eyes the moving form in its reflection.  We think he is going to harm the shadowy figure behind him, but then he drops the axe and turns to hug… his daughter, Jenny (Alyssa Milano).  This is called narrative economy: setting up a killing machine with compassion – in two shots.  The sequence that follows – with wonderful flute and string accompaniment, I might add – puts any expository opening credits to shame.  We see how much Matrix cares about Jenny because he lets her smash ice cream into his face.  While developing the backstory for Matrix, Arnold and I decided that in his past, Matrix once was the victim of ice cream to the face by a Russian spy, and carved out his trangressor’s heart with a hunting knife.  So, it takes an immense amount of love for Matrix to not do the same to Jenny, even though she’s only playing.  That’s character development. SETTING UP THE STAKES In this scene, we set up the bond between father and daughter by showing that John is in touch with his daughter, Jenny’s lifestyle.  He uses his knowledge of what’s tops on “pop culture street” in order to develop a playful rapport with Jenny over sandwiches.  It’s here that Matrix’s verbal wit shows its face for the first time, as he wryly asks Jenny about pop idol Boy George, “Why don’t they just call him Girl George?”  This is something Arnold came up with on set, and it was such a perfect adjustment.  It really won over the studio, who had originally given me notes to "not have Arnold speak" in the film. But Arnold’s questioning of Boy George’s sexuality is thought provoking, albeit a tad juvenile.  And Jenny’s retort – “That’s so old, Dad" – is such an honest moment.  The young child never wants to admit she’s been one-upped by a parent.  Matrix, ever the model father, is then sure to temper his immature remark by following up with a socio-political lesson.  “In East Germany, the Communists said that rock and roll was subversive.”  It’s no doubt that Jenny was head of the class in her school with such a worldly teacher constantly serving up “wisdom food” like that!

COOL BLACKLIGHT CONCEPT ART
Tuesday, March 17 by

According to Slash Film, "Fox Atomic has acquired the rights to turn indie developer Zombie Studio’s original action property "Blacklight" into a feature film, comic book series and video game." It's supposedly a "covert military action epic set 25 years into the future" and will be told using a this multi-platform approach of print, video game and feature film.  And the cool part is that all the pieces will interconnect to create one larger arc.  Well, it's cool if you can afford it.  Sort of reminds me of the hell my grandparents must've gone through finding all those Voltron Lions.  (You can imagine the disappointment of having an amputee robot.) More artwork after the jump.

St. Paddy’s Day TV Preview
Tuesday, March 17 by

Slainte! Grab some green, some kegs, some cabbage and corned beef, some shamrocks, and of course, your remote. The Leprechaun inside your TV is offering some brilliant accoutrements to accompany you through the night: Snoop Dogg talking to Busta Rhymes in soft focus while babes dance in the background, Rudy going against all odds, and a showing of Will Ferrell being hilarious while quite inebriated. Your preview after the break.   Dogg After Dark 9/8c on MTV Busta gives credit where credit's due.

LESBIAN VAMP KILLERS RED BAND CLIP
Tuesday, March 17 by

Our friends over at Dread Central posted the new Red Band clip for the upcoming Lesbian Vampire Killers flick, which is an adaptation of a Jane Austen novel, of course. LVK is shaping up to be a pretty good piece of camp cinema, if I do say so myself.  And I just did.  So click for the jump, sit back, relax, and have some good, sexy, bloodsucking laughs courtesy of Momentum Pictures.  (We've also included the trailer, as well as some kickass poster art and stills.)

KNOWING’S ROSE BYRNE
Tuesday, March 17 by

This Friday, Rose Byrne will be teaming up with Nic Cage in the supernatural apocalyptic actioner Knowing, directed by The Crow and Dark City's Alex Proyas. Where You've Seen Her: Rose, an Aussie, is probably best known for her role opposite Glen Close in FX's Damages.  But she also made memorable turns as Scarlet in 28 Weeks Later, as Briseis in Troy, and as Cassie in Danny Boyle's Sunshine. She also had a minor role as one of Natalie Portman's doppelgangers in Star Wars Episode II: Attack of the Clones.  Pointless Quote: "I see myself more as a character actress than a celebrity."  See more pics of Rose after the jump!

12 More Insanely Bad TV Commercials
Tuesday, March 17 by

A while back we scoured the internet to bring you a collection of the worst local tv ads. We ended up finding so many that we had to give you more. This time around the selection is far crazier and far crappier. Crapzier. “Enjoy!" JONES BIG ASS TRUCK RENTAL & STORAGE This is actually a fake but it’s a charming fake so it’s too hilarious to not include. Which is a shame because if he were real, I’m sure that Toby Jones would be crowned King of Them Internets. DYNAMIC PAWN SHOP

“LEP’ IN THE HOOD” END CREDITS RAP
Tuesday, March 17 by

 Nothing says St. Patrick's Day like a Leprechaun commandeering the mic at a strip club and then proceeding to wax lyrical about his roots.  He's quite the M.C., but I suppose that's par for the course with a mythical goblin who speaks in anapestic line verse.  That's poetry terminology, son!  I'd like to imagine that the little guy stayed around to intro the featured strippers when they come out to do their pole dance on stage.