News - Page 296

Darth Vader Checks Leia for Cavities
Wednesday, December 30 by

You'd think a princess would know when she's being played.Open wide for today's links.25 Best Memes of 2009 (HolyTaco)Woman's Basketball Team Poses for Sexy Calendar (TotalProSports)Holy Sh*t Bar Refaeli is Hot (TheChive)The Hottest Girls of the SEC (Maxim)Worst Trailers of the Year (FilmDrunk)Best Viral Videos of the Decade (Manofest)Biggest Box Office Flops of 2010 (Pajiba)Selena Gomez Forgets to Wear Pants (CelebJihad)Writing Utensils Make Good Weapons (Unreality)Best of the 2010 Bikini Calendars (Asylum)Here Are Some Nice Tramps (RegretfulMorning)How to Keep Your New Year's Resolutions (MadeMan)2010 NASCAR Sprint Cup Predictions (AllLeftTurns)

Be the FIRST! to See ‘LOST’ Season Six Premiere
Wednesday, December 30 by

Did ya hear the news?!! You can be the envy of all your friends until 9:07pm February 2nd, 2010. That's right! 815 lucky viewers have the opportunity to view an exclusive sneak peek of the first six minutes of LOST season six.In order to do so, visit the sweepstakes site and answer six questions about the show. Winners will receive a digital "message in a bottle" that contains the opening minutes of the premiere four full days before it is scheduled to air. That gives you 96 hours and 6 minutes to feel self-important. After that, you're a schmuck like the rest of us.Am I going to enter? F*ck yeah. This is an out-of-context six minutes of LOST we're talking about here. (ABC)

‘Always Sunny’ Bar Breaks the Fourth Wall
Wednesday, December 30 by

Rob McElhenney, the creator and star of the FX comedy It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia, looks like a man with a child actor's head. But that's not the story here.It's being reported that McElhenney has purchased a bar in Philadelphia along with his co-star/wife Kaitlin Olson. The plan is to name the grog house after Mac's Old Towne Tavern, the bar featured in the show. This guy is a genius. Not only does he come out of nowhere to co-create one of the best comedies on television, use that show to get a hot wife, but now he can also pay Danny Devito in beer with low overhead. Genius. (via Eater via Warming Glow) 

‘Keeping Up with the Kardashians’ Star Kourtney Kardashian
Wednesday, December 30 by

Kourtney Kardashian is known for being the older, less attractive sister of Kim Kardashian. Also, she just had a baby. Gross. A word from Kourtney: "There's so many times I'll forget to take my pill and I don't think it's that big of a deal."Yeah, no big deal. The only downside is you get BABIES!!!Practice safe sex by checking out the pics after the jump.

SJ’s Best Movies of the Aughts
Wednesday, December 30 by

Unlike our stance on orgasming, we waited until the last possible minute to do this list. You’ll probably angrily chant "Rabble, rabble, rabble!" in disagreement, but that’s what makes these…

Mila Kunis Burns Her Itchy, No Good ‘Book Of Eli’ Clothes
Wednesday, December 30 by

In an apparent "F YOU" to Planet Hollywood, Mila Kunis decided to burn her The Book Of Eli wardrobe once production had wrapped. From Kunis: "I kept none of my ensemble from the film. It was so dirty and filthy. In fact I burned it in effigy when we wrapped production." C'mon Mila. It couldn't have been that bad. As we can see from this trailer for the Denzel as Mad Max post apocalyptic thriller, the outfit doesn't seem that bad. It's a flannel, wool vest, and combat boots. A.) You're from the Ukraine, you should be used to that look, and B.) Rosie O'Donnell would pay good money for threads like that. (WENN)

Eva Longoria & Tony Parker Get Greased Up
Tuesday, December 29 by

Husband and wife team Eva Longoria & Toni Parker recreated the "Summer Nights" musical number from Grease, someone filmed it, and now it will live on forever. Instead of a sex tape we get this eye raping. Thanks, universe. Calm your nerves with these links.Who Will Die in 2010? (HolyTaco) Hockey Hit Leaves Blood on the Ice (TotalProSports) The Sol Beer Girls are Hot (TheChive) A Funny Montage of Movie Laughs (Maxim) The Bear Jew Made Nazi Propaganda (FilmDrunk) Don't Mess with Exorcist Cat (SuperTremendous) Pajiba's Person of the Decade (Pajiba) Kourtney Kardashian's Bastard Baby Photos (CelebJihad) Minimalist TV Show Designs are Artsy, Awesome (Unreality) Scripts for Your Casual Sexual Role-Playing (Asylum) 8 Memorable Movie Explosions (RegretfulMorning) Brush Up on Your Speed Dating Skills (MadeMan) 25 Greatest MMA Knockouts of 2009 (CagePotato) What is the Watermill Score? (AllLeftTurns)

‘Keeping Up with the Kardashians’ Star Kim Kardashian
Tuesday, December 29 by

We all know Kim Kardashian, I just haven't done a post of her yet so I thought I'd go ahead and do that. She's famous for being famous, and having sex with a rapper.A word from Kim: "I have a sex tape with a Black guy! That's why I'm famous!"See? Even SHE admits it. But damn if she can't wear a shirt. Or not wear one. Check out more pics of Kim and her assets after the jump.

Own the ‘Back to the Future’ DeLorean and Be Awesome
Tuesday, December 29 by

Someone spent a loooooooot of time building a near exact replica of the DeLorean from Back to the Future and now they're hawking it on eBay for you, or someone with more money than you, to purchase. I actually saw this very DeLorean at a car show in Culver City, CA this past Summer, and I have to say it's a pretty amazing contraption. The only downside is it doesn't come equipped with a flux capacitor, arguably the coolest part of the DeLorean in the film, and the interior smells like the remains of Christopher Lloyd's career. That stuff's like cigarette smoke, it just doesn't come out.So far there's been one bid on Doc's DeLorean and it's currently at $59,000.00 with the reserve price unmet. If you choose, you can also purchase the car at the current "Buy It Now" price of $89,000.00.Check out all the stats at the eBay page and see a few more pics of the souped-up DeLorean after the jump.

Jude Law Wants Your Organ in Red Band ‘Repo Men’ Trailer
Tuesday, December 29 by

I've heard of a circumcision, but this is ridiculous! Universal decided to take Repo Men from its shelf of Movies We Don't Want To Release, dust it off, and release it. It tells of a near future when human life spans have been greatly extended by expensive artificial organs created by a company called The Union. When people fail to make their payments for a fancy new liver or other piece of their gut, a team of surgical operatives are sent out to reclaim The Union’s property. The film follows two of these guys, played by Jude Law and Forest Whitaker. (via /Film)  I have trouble suspending my disbelief in regards to Jude Law as an action star and anyone giving Forest Whitaker a license to cut people open when they have no way of knowing what he sees through that one weird eye. Maybe it zooms in on stuff.  Check out the Red Band Repo Men trailer after the jump. Beware, it's not safe for work due to all the blood and Liev Schreiber-ness.

‘Star Trek’ Sequel Officially Starts Getting Started Next Year
Tuesday, December 29 by

Whether Mr. J.J. Abrams likes it or not, Zoe Saldana refuses to keep her pretty little mouth shut about the Star Trek sequel, unofficially titled Star Trek: Uhura's Quest for Spock's Nuts. Yay for all of us! She said Abrams, Alex Kurtzman, and Roberto Orci are all still working on the script, and that they'll probably be going into pre-production around this time next year.It's just pre-production, people. That means they'll start making drawings of how they want the shiny sets and costumes to look. Then once they decide how many whatevers should hang from the whatever, they have to make those whatevers a reality. Someone will probably get injured during construction, which will cause a delay, and during that time J.J. will realize there's a huge plot hole in the script. I expect to see the Star Trek sequel in 2015. (MTV)

These People Died in 2009
Tuesday, December 29 by

People die, and it's very sad, but when you're famous, or even "famous," television networks and award ceremonies put together an in memorium video that reminds everyone that you died, how attractive you were when you were younger, and how you used to work on projects that weren't complete sh*t. Below is a remembrance video that Turner Classic Movies put together that does all those things, and also displays some fantastic Autumn foliage. Are the dead people supposed to be the wind or the leaves? My guess is there's a little bit of them in every one of us. It's comforting to know that Michael Jackson is inside me right now.

Avatar: The Making of the Bootleg
Monday, December 28 by

It's one thing to work years creating a breakthrough technology that will revolutionize cinema as we know it, and it's another thing to work years figuring out how to ilegally record the aforementioned breakthrough. Bootlegging is an art, and bootlegging Avatar is a bootlegging artist's Mona Lisa. (via IWatchStuff)We give credit where credit is due with these links.25 Hottest Women of 2009 (HolyTaco) Top 10 Embarrassing Sports Moments of 2009 (TotalProSports) Millenium Falcon Bed Guarantees Zero Sex (TheChive) 100 Twitter Accounts for Guys (Maxim) James Cameron Tells Fan to F**k Off (FilmDrunk) 20 Amazing Cheese Sculptures (SuperTremendous) Most Painful Movie-Going Experiences of the Aughts (Pajiba) Pics of Olivia Wilde's Booty (CelebJihad) Really Creepy Real Children's Books (Unreality) Sexiest Magazine Covers of 2009 (Asylum) 35 Hot Girls Wearing Santa Hats (RegretfulMorning) 2009 Chickipedia Hot 100 (MadeMan) Top 10 NASCAR Women of 2009 (AllLeftTurns) Massive Soccer Hooligan Brawl (NothingToxic) Atom's Best of 2009 (Atom)

Harold Ramis Plans to Start Shooting ‘Ghostbusters 3′ Next Summer
Monday, December 28 by

Our friends over at Heeb Magazine snagged a nice little interview with director Harold Ramis, and they got some info out of him regarding the progress of Ghostbusters 3:We’ll introduce some new young Ghostbusters, and all the old guys will be in it, too. Think Christopher Lloyd in Back to the Future … GB3 is progressing with plans to shoot next summer and release in 2011 … Oh, and I have two one-of-a-kind Ghostbuster yarmulkes sent by fans. Screw the news about the movie, Ramis has Ghostbuster yarmulkes! I'll be the envy of all my temple.. There have been a lot of rumors lately regarding the development of the latest Ghostbusters film, so let's just hope Ramis isn't talking a big game. I want to see all the people in the top picture do the same dance, but each carrying at least 50 more pounds now.Check out the rest of the interview with Harold Ramis here.

English Doesn’t Help Make Sense of New ‘Inception’ Trailer
Monday, December 28 by

Leo emerges from a basin of amniotic fluid. The new trailer for Inception has hit, and even though this one's in English I still have no idea what that f*ck is going on. Last week we showed you the French version which made a lot more sense in the sense that it was foreign and foreign things are weird. What I gather from this trailer is what we already know about the movie: Leo DiCaprio is entering people's minds and stealing images/thoughts/dreams/wet dreams with a sleek, metallic vibrator. He also likes to spin a dreidel to work through problems. Can I surmise that his character is Jewish? Oh Nolan, why won't you give me more! Oy vey! Check out the new Inception trailer at Apple.  

Spike Lee Refuses to Let Michael Jackson Die in ‘This Is It’ Music Video
Monday, December 28 by

Okay, this better SERIOUSLY be it. Spike Lee edited together old footage of Michael Jackson with some new wide, fast push-in shots to create the final music video for his final song, This Is It. Lee's probably livid (he gets livid a lot) that the director of High School Musical, Kenny Ortega, got to direct the big screen version of M.J.'s farewell, and he wanted to create his own harmonious images of the now months dead superstar. Check out the video below if you still have an interest. (via PerezHilton)

7 Supermodels Who Can’t Act
Monday, December 28 by
‘Men of a Certain Age’ Actress Carla Gallo
Monday, December 28 by

Carla Gallo starred in Judd Apatow's short-lived sitcom Undeclared, and has popped up in most of his films ever since. She sucked Steve Carell's toes in The 40 Year Old Virgin and got awkwardly banged by Jason Segel in Forgetting Sarah Marshall.  She can now be seen serving Scott Bakula his coffee in Men of a Certain Age.A word from Carla: "The minute I get home I change into a pair of pink Juicy bottoms I bought 5 years ago. Daily. Not kidding. They smell like the CEO of HBO's jizz." When you walk around with JUICY tagged across your ass, the CEO of HBO is bound to take it literally.Check out some more JUICY photos of Carla after the jump.

Kim Kardashian Sells Carl’s Jr. Chicken Salad, Boobs
Monday, December 28 by

Kim Kardashian Carls Jr. Commercial – Watch more Funny VideosIt was only a matter of time until this happened. Kim Kardashian has gone and sold another piece of her soul by starring in a Carl's Jr. fast food exploitation advertisment, and I'm not complaining the tiniest bit. Give that grilled chicken walnut leafy thing all you got, Kim. Then think about what you've done in a nice warm bubble bath while you continue indulging. Damn, I just got dressing all over my desk. 

No ‘The A-Team’ Cameo for Mr. T’s Mohawk
Monday, December 28 by

I pity the fool who doesn't offer compensation in the form of Snickers! I realize this is going to shatter your world, but it doesn't look like Mr. T is going to make a cameo appearance in The A-Team picture film. Dwight Schultz, the original "Howling Mad" Murdoch, and Dirk Benedict, the original "Faceman" Peck, are still rumored to possibly grace the screen, but Mr. T has given director Joe Carnahan a mild middle finger.Apparently it's not about the money (or Snickers) either. He simply just doesn't see the point in making such a small appearance (as he won't be on set long enough to stockpile Snickers). Mr. T is content with his life right now and enjoying giving back to the community. Pardon me while a make the universal sign for "jerk me off" with my free hand. I guess he can't take a day off from barking nonsensical orders at the volunteers of Habitat for Humanity to pal around on The A-Team set. Don't worry though, the most you'll miss from his absence is a slight, amused smile and you thinking to yourself, "Hey, that's Mr. T on screen in The A-Team Movie. How amusing." (via LatinoReview)

Redbox Rethinks Posting Photo of Dead Brittany Murphy
Saturday, December 26 by

Allllright, who's playing a trick on the people over at the film Deadline? If this is a publicity stunt, kudos, everyone. Ku-dos. DVD retailer Redbox, after realizing that they're advertising Brittany Murphy dead in a bathtub and she recently died in bathtub, decided to clean up the panic-induced sh*t in their tighty-whities and pull the poster for Deadline. The recall of the image from over 19,000 kiosks nationwide will take 7 to 10 days to complete, and the film's distributor is working on an alternate DVD cover image. They're running on the assumption that Britany Murphy really is dead and not simply trying to push copies of her latest film. It's probably good to error on the side of caution, but if Murphy reemerges from her tomb in a few days, Redbox is going to look awfully silly. (via Cinematical)

Merry Christmas! Hope Santa Didn’t Murder You!
Friday, December 25 by

Here's a classic clip from the film Silent Night, Deadly Night that reminds us all never to strike up a conversation with the elderly. Chances are they're going to frighten or cough on you. "You see Santa tonight you better run, boy! You better run…for your life!"

‘It’s Complicated’ Actress Lake Bell
Thursday, December 24 by

The only thing I don't like about Lake Bell is her name. Who names their kid after a body of water? Hippies, that's who! River Phoenix's parents did it and look what happened to him. He died outside of a nightclub. Let this be a lesson to all parents: don't go chasing waterfalls. Please stick to the rivers and the lakes that you're used to. Why did I just quote TLC? See Lake taking Meryl Streep's Baldwin in It's Complicated on Christmas Day.A word from Lake: "You have to keep hobbies in L.A. Otherwise, it's sad."Um, hello, Lake. What about being disillusioned? That keeps things constantly happy. And don't you tell me otherwise! See pics of Lake in a lake after the jump. Brilliant!

Kevin Smith’s ‘Cop Out’ Trailer is Missing ‘Dicks’ and Balls
Thursday, December 24 by

  Grooooooaaaaaan. The trailer for Kevin Smith's new "comedy" Cop Out, formerly know as A Couple of Cops, formerly know as A Couple of Dicks (yes! funnier!), has hit, and it's about as amusing as tweezing someone else's pubes. I can't even tell what the movie is about, except that Tracy Morgan's character (I'm guessing a mentally challenged volunteer?) is teamed up with Bruce Willis's character (a "doin' it for the paycheck" grizzled veteran who's simply getting too old for this sh*t?).  Oh Kevin Smith, what has happened to you. I don't doubt that movie making by committee impeded on your ultimate vision for this film, but I honestly don't know if your ultimate vision would have been much better even if you were given free reign. Maybe if Jay and Silent Bob were hanging outside of every convenience store Morgan and Willis will inevitably go in to. After all, you gotta get product placement in their somehow. My ideal sponsors for this film would be Chiquita Bananas and KY Jelly.   Cop Out rips one in theaters on February 2nd, 2010. Check out the trailer after the jump. Or if you'd like to be more entertained, just watch the opening credits of Panic Room. 

Cinema 2009 Retrospective Retrospects Cinema of 2009
Wednesday, December 23 by

Editor Kees van Dijkhuizen has put together a tremendous Cinema 2009 retrospective. He's mashed together an enormous amount of 2009 film clips for his piece, 1 Year, 342 Movies, 12 Months of Production, 7 Minutes. Think of it as a more whimsical Trailer To End All Trailers.From Kees: "2009 proved that innovation is rewarded, and for that reason, I've decided no film should be left behind." For the most part, he's true to his word. The only thing missing from this clip is Nic Cage and his singing iguanas. Once you're done updating your Netflix queue, check out these links… Where To Hook Up in an Airport (Holy Taco) Redneck Waterskiing (Total Pro Sports) Your Girlfriend is Doing a Kegstand (The Chive) Brendan Fraser: A Career in Pictures (FilmDrunk) 8 Gifts That Only Rich Kids Got (Maxim) This Decade's Most Painful Movies (Pajiba) Zany Snowmen (Unreality) Things  You Should Never Do or Say When Stopped for a DWI (Asylum) Mrs. Claus Looks Very Good in Very Little (RegretfulMorning) 8 Women Who Are Completely Off-Limits (MadeMan) What Is Your NASCAR IQ? (AllLeftTurns) Dude Gets Run Over by Roller Coaster (NothingToxic) In Case You Wanted A Russian Mail-Order Wife for X-Mas (Atom)

‘Alice in Wonderland’ Tea Party Billboard Warrants a No RSVP
Wednesday, December 23 by

 I'm pretty sure that if I attended this tea party I would be the biscuit this motley crew served their LSD on. Who is the Mad Hatter's interior designer anyway? You can't mix multi-colored tablecloths and then just place a caterpillar on a giant mushroom in the foyer. It ruins the whole flow of the space!This new art proves to be just as trippy as the most recent trailer, and I'm not sure if that's a good or a bad thing. I still haven't decided if I'm excited about this new Tim Burton cacophony of mental wails, but a few Xanax might change my mind. (via JoBlo) 

Nature Finally Lashes Out at Brendan Fraser in ‘Furry Vengeance’
Wednesday, December 23 by

This raccoon needs to fire his agent. If you thought that the box office failure of Old Dogs signaled a sea change in American cinema, I'm sorry to say that you need to be less stupid. Below is the trailer for Furry Vengeance, a movie about woodland animals trying to destroy Brendan Fraser. Don't worry yourselves, animals. His management team will destroy him in due time. Furry Vengeance opens in theaters April 2nd, 2010, just in case you're looking for an empty theater that day. Commit eyeball-seppuku by watching the trailer after the jump…

‘The Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus’ Actress Lily Cole
Wednesday, December 23 by

Lily Cole is one of those models that you look at and think to yourself, "How is that girl a model?" She's hot but also kinda weird looking, like there's too much face for her features, even though her eyes are huge. I have absolutely nothing to complain about below the neck. A word from Lily: "Kate Moss has had such a phenomenal career and I wouldn't even like to compare myself to her."Lily's got more meat on her bones than Kate, which is nice. Maybe she'll become known as the fat Kate Moss, meaning healthy-looking.  Check out more fat Kate Moss pics after the jump.

New ‘Inception’ Trailer is Trippy, French
Wednesday, December 23 by

France has given America so much over the years; the Statue of Liberty, cheese, a place for Johnny Depp to sleep, and now this new Inception trailer. I'm not sure if this is the trailer that will be attached to Sherlock Holmes later this week but I am sure that it looks intriguing and deserves a watch. Leonardo DiCaprio contends with a city that is literally curling in on itself as if it were being potato-peeled. It's hard to say what exactly is going on other than that, but Christopher Nolan's visual style has me hungry for more. Sadly, I failed French but I'll try to translate anyway. Hmmm. All I've got is "the duck… is tall." What does that even mean?? Is that part of another one of those damn confusing virals? (Making Of) Bend your mind around the trailer after the jump…

Ricky Gervais Torments Elmo
Wednesday, December 23 by

Recently Sesame Street's Elmo was having a really hard time falling asleep (you would too if you had a hand shoved up your poop-shoot). Luckily, the unbelievably famous Ricky Gervais broke into the young Muppet's bedroom to assist with a "Celebrity Lullaby." To coax Elmo off to Dreamland, Gervais decided to serenade him about the letter "N" and all the words you can spell with it. Words like, Nap, Nightcap, Nummies, and Naff off you insufferable little sh*t. Gervais doesn't come right out and say that but you can tell he wants to. Between this and their earlier insult-laden video, the tension between them is so thick. Hurry up and bang already, you two. Everyone knows you want it.