News - Page 263

GULLIVER’S TRAVELS
Friday, June 4 by

Director: Rob LettermanCast: Jack Black, Emily Blunt, T.J. Miller, Amanda PeetSynopsis: In a contemporary re–imagining of the classic tale, Jack Black stars as Gulliver, a big–talking mailroom clerk who, after he’s mistakenly assigned a travel piece on the Bermuda Triangle, suddenly finds himself a giant among men when he washes ashore on the hidden island of Lilliput, home to a population of very tiny people.Release Date: December 22, 2010

Sex and the City 3: Judgment Day
Friday, June 4 by

Samantha and her new bo get frisky!Just yesterday, it seemed as if Sex and the City's destruction was all but assured. With poor box-office returns, a rapidly aging cast and the death of Rue McClanahan (a.k.a. Samantha), another film seemed out of the question. But much like Skynet from the Terminator series, SATC is launching a last-ditch effort to escape oblivion by fleeing into the past.New Line has expressed interest in adapting SATC author Candace Bushnell's follow-up series, "The Carrie Diaries," into a prequel, allowing for a "new and younger-skewing collection of films." Perhaps most disturbing is the fact that Bushnell herself has expressed interest in Miley Cyrus as a possible lead.Unless we want to see Sex and the City continue to plague mankind for generations to come, this prequel must be stopped. For he who controls the past controls the future, and he who controls the present controls the past…or something like that. (CinemaBlend)

Olivia Munn Joins ‘The Daily Show’
Friday, June 4 by

In a bid to make the program more fappable, "The Daily Show With Jon Stewart" has added Olivia Munn as the new "Senior Asian Correspondent." Munn appeared on last night's program to report the plight of Vietnamese fishermen effected by the spill in the Gulf. She will continue to appear throughout the coming weeks as she continues to try out for the show. I can understand Olivia's wanting to be on a show where her co-host doesn't seek every opportunity to feel her up, but I really feel like she'd fit better as the "Senior Nerd Correspondent." If anyone can get the truth out of an overweight virgin in a Destro costume, it's her. How'd she do? Check out the clip after the jump….

Daniel Craig Wants a ‘Dragon Tattoo’
Friday, June 4 by

Daniel Craig hasn't made a movie since 2008, but it looks as if his schedule is about to fill up fast. The actor best known as James Bond is close to nabbing the part of Mikael Blomkvist in David Fincher's adaptation of The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo. The film is the first in a three-part series based on the crime novels of Stieg Larsson, and Craig is expected to sign on for all three installments.Rumor has it that Brad Pitt was close to landing the role, but was "edged out" when a bikini-clad Craig showed up at David Fincher's house and offered to wash the director's car. Fincher filmed the wash, and was so impressed by Craig's physique the he offered him the job on the spot. True story. (Collider)

The New ‘Expendables’ Trailer Has a Nice Looking Skull, Bird
Friday, June 4 by

Stallone, Schwarzenegger, Crow.The Expendables has released its second theatrical trailer. And like any movie staring almost every living action star known to man, the film knows what the fans want to see: a crow sitting on top of the skull from Indy 4. The marketing guru's behind this ad should win a medal for their brave choice. After all, who needs to see "action" when you've got a nice looking bird to watch? Audubon Society 4 Ev-a, Dogg! (SlashFilm) Watch a bird sit on a skull and then fly away after the jump.

Captain Picard Gets Knighted
Thursday, June 3 by

Yesterday, Queen Elizabeth II knighted Patrick Stewart, which means we all have to call him Sir now. Pffffft. I'm supposed to call Bono "Sir" but you don't see that happening, do you? Hey, Streets With No Names, get your Irish ass over here and refill my Guinness!If you could so kindly click on these proper links. Sam Mendes to Direct 'On Chesil Beach'? (Moviefone)Female Bankers Who Should Be Fired for Hotness (Asylum)Zack Morris and Wife Split (PopEater)Gwyneth Paltrow Wants to Show You Her Taco (FilmDrunk)25 Sexy Pics of NBA Finals Dancers (HolyTaco)If TV and Movie Characters Ran a College (Unreality)10 Ways to Get Drunk for Free in NYC (BroBible)Asshole Rockers From Movies (Maxim)7 Most Triumphant Losses in MMA History (CagePotato)Exclusive Picture of Gary Coleman's Coffin (CelebJihad)21 Crazy Church Signs (Smosh)Determining Your Level of Degeneracy (Pajiba)Jockey Stud (Atom)Dream Job: Bomb Squad (MadeMan)How to Get Serviced Without a Girl (RegretfulMorning)

Behind the Scenes Look at AMC’s ‘The Walking Dead’
Thursday, June 3 by

Zombie Jim Carrey wants braaaaaaains. Yesterday we showed you the first still from AMC's upcoming Frank Darabont produced zombie series "The Walking Dead," and now we've got another gruesome pic and a brief behind the scenes featurette. There, ya happy?! The featurette gives us a taste of what to expect from the adaptation of the graphic novel, but more importantly it shows Frank Darabont just talking. That man's voice, it's just so soothing. If the government reinstitutes fireside chats I'd gladly snuggle up with the family to listen to Papa Frank lay out the state of union.   Check out the featurette after the jump. "The Walking Dead" infects your TV sets this October.

BP Declines James Cameron’s Oil Spill Advice
Thursday, June 3 by

Sh*t's f*cked, yo.The ocean is James Cameron's sandbox and BP has crapped in it. Knowing that the HMFIC wouldn't stand for that, the EPA called him in to discuss raking that crap out of there. However, British Petroleum has shot him down his help.Cameron suggested the U.S. government needed to take a more active role in monitoring the undersea gusher, which has become the worst oil spill in U.S. history.“I know really, really, really smart people [and Tom Arnold] that work typically at depths much greater than what that well is at,” Cameron said. “The government really needs to have its own independent ability to go down there and image the site, survey the site and do its own investigation,” he said.  “Because if you’re not monitoring it independently, you’re asking the perpetrator to give you the video of the crime scene,” Cameron added.I just can't believe someone said no to James Cameron. The last person who did that was Linda Hamilton and we all know how well that turned out. That's right. A guest-starring role on "According to Jim." **shudder** (Reuters)

Hanukkah: The Horror Movie
Thursday, June 3 by

They're making a horror movie about a mashugina (crazy) Jewish extremist named the Hannukiller who slaughters people during the eight nights of Hanukkah. Judah Lazarus is killed by the police while trying to sacrifice his son Obediah on the last night of Hanukkah. Once Obediah is a grown man, instead of feeling all l'chaim, he decides to become intolerant of non-Jews, "bad Jews," and those he perceives to be enemies of the Jewish faith. He unleashes eight nights of mishigas (madness). A group of Jewish schlemiels (teenagers) are getting ready to kibitz (party) for the holidays, but are in for a Festival of Oy Gavalts (Frights). With the help of a mensch (wise) Rabbi, they deduce that the murder victims have falshed (violated) Judiac law and that their only chance at survival is to embrace their faith.Oy vey, a need a schvitz after yiddishizing that synopsis. So needless to say, Hanukkah will be a must see this holiday season. You bring the latkes, I'll bring the gafilte fish. (JoBlo)Check out the posters for the film after the jump. And the Punimbook page here.

Rue McClanahan Has Died
Thursday, June 3 by

Fur is murder. Sad news today that the Facebook-neglected Golden Girl Rue McClanahan passed away after suffering a massive stroke. She is of course best known for her role as O.G. Cougar Blanche Devereaux. We're sad to see her go but would like to celebrate her for what she did best: partying on Cat Mountain.

‘Get Him To The Greek’ Actress Rose Byrne
Thursday, June 3 by

Rose Byrne is an Australian actress. She plays Ellen Parsons in the FX show "Damages," opposite American dramatic institution Glenn Close. Byrne has been in a relationship with Australian writer, director and actor Brendan Cowell for over four years (Boooo!). The couple maintained a long-distance relationship for much of their relationship, with work commitments meaning they were often on separate continents. This means he's a better man than you. A word from Rose: "I see myself more as a character actress than a celebrity."Keep that good head on your shoulders. When you discover you're a celebrity you'll probably want coke, or to kill a homeless person. Apparently it has something to do with power. More pics of professional Rose after the jump.

‘Inception’ Featurette Fortunately Doesn’t Give Away Much
Thursday, June 3 by

In case you don't make it to the theater thirty minutes before your movie to secure good seats so you don't have to sit next to a mouth-breather or texting addict, here's some Inception pre-show entertainment for you. The featurette gives us a teeny-eency-weency more in depth look at Christopher Nolan's upcoming mindf*ck of a film. In fact, if the MPAA and society allowed it, I'm positive the title of Inception would be Christopher Nolan's Mindf*ck. I guess we'll just have to wait for the porno version to be released the following day. Check out the trippy featurette after the jump…

10 Most Baffling Movie Franchises
Thursday, June 3 by

In Hollywood, it usually makes sense to make sequel after sequel. Whether a series is good or bad, there’s some fan base who’ll keep coming back and the studios will make greater dough. There are just a few that make so little sense, I can’t believe they even tried to do more than one. As summer sequel season begins, we look at the 10 most baffling franchises in Hollywood history.BASIC INSTINCTThe only reason there’s even one sequel to this movie is that the studio decided it would be cheaper to make a whole movie than settle a lawsuit with Sharon Stone. So now Basic Instinct is a franchise, with a sequel that made less than Larry the Cable Guy’s first movie. I'm wondering who crunched the numbers and came to the conclusion that making an entire production would be more economical than settling a lawsuit. 

Here’s What Chris Hemsworth As ‘Thor’ Might Look Like
Thursday, June 3 by

Please relax your eyes and stare at the above image. Now, tell Dr. Johnson what you see. Is it a) early concept art of Chris Hemsworth as Marvel's Thor, b) Will Ferrell dressed as Viggo the Carpathian, or c) Dog the Bounty Hunter accentuating his wardrobe with peacocking flair after reading "The Game?" Answer below.It's Thor, you guys. (Collider)More unofficially official images of Thor after the jump…

Tom Selleck Confirms ‘Three Men and an Unnecessary Sequel’ Rumors
Thursday, June 3 by

Why are these dudes still living together? Actor Tom Selleck confirmed that Disney is attempting to move forward on a third installment in the Three Men series. For those of you born after 1992, this refers to a popular 80's movie (Three Men and a Baby) and its disappointing, midget-porn sequel (Three Men and a Little Lady) co-starring Selleck, Steve Guttenberg and Ted Danson. Make your own Steve Guttenberg joke, cause I like the guy. "It is true that Disney checked my availability," Selleck told the site. "And I know they checked Ted's and Steve's, and then had a script written, I think tentatively called 'Three Men and a Bride,' which kind of says it all [about the story]." I'm trying really hard not to be negative, but the "baby" from the film is now in her mid twenties, and no one besides my friend Jon wants to see a girl in her 20's "accidentally" pee on Ted Danson. I'm not even sure Netflix can legally send something like that through the mail.  While we're at it, why not just make Adventures in Babysitting: The Next Generation, Good Evening Vietnam, or Mannequin: The Revenge.* (ComingSoon)*These are all real pitches. I demand an executive producer credit and 5% of both the domestic and international box-office.

Will Jennifer Aniston ‘Scream’ for Cox?
Wednesday, June 2 by

Aniston Sucks Cox…GET IT!?!The Internet rumor mill is working overtime tonight, speculating that Jennifer Aniston will be joining her former "Friends" co-star, Courtney Cox, in the upcoming horror sequel, Scream 4.According to Star Magazine, which is one step up from reading the scribblings on a bathroom wall, Aniston's character will die early on. This follows in the tradition of the previous Scream films which have all killed off a big-name star within the first few minutes.If the rumors prove true, it will not be the first stab at the horror genre for either actress. Cox has been a mainstay of the Scream franchise since its inception, and Aniston has been terrifying audiences for years with films such as The Break-Up and He's Just Not That Into You. (CinemaBlend)

‘ThunderCats’ Claws Its Way Back to Television
Wednesday, June 2 by

I remember why this was so popular!Twenty years after its cancellation, "ThunderCats" is poised to return to the small screen. A re-imaged "anime-inspired" version of the classic 80's cartoon will begin airing on Cartoon Network in 2011. The Cats join a growing list of retro characters headed to the CN lineup, including Batman, Scooby-Doo and The Looney Tunes. While CN is hopeful that the entire cast will return, the beloved character of Snarf may end up as the lone holdout. The annoying, overweight feline is currently in negotiations to join Joy Behar and Whoopi Goldberg on "The View," which would all but rule out his participation in the relaunch. (Variety) Watch two minutes of Snarf repeatedly saying "Snarf" after the Snarf.

Best Caricature Artist Ever
Wednesday, June 2 by

He really nailed the eyes.These links will cheer you up, Fat Little Girl.Free Outdoor Summer Film Festivals (Moviefone)Russell Brand Tips for Getting Laid (Asylum)M.I.A.'s French Fry Fight (PopEater)The Dos ad Don'ts of Soul Selling (HolyTaco)Keifer in Talks for Werewolf Fight Club (FilmDrunk)10 Best Comedy Duos of All Time (Unreality)AT&T Nixes Unlimited Wireless Plans (BroBible)Greatest Wrestling Move Ever (TotalProSports)Progression of a Celebrity (Maxim)Kim Couture Arrested After Choking Personal Assistant (CagePotato)Jessica Simpson is Totally Not Fat (CelebJihad)20 Horrible Place Names (Smosh)5 Best Single TV Episodes of the Season (Pajiba)M'Larky Slugs It Out (Atom)Have a Summer Fling (MadeMan)

Charles Grodin Might Return to ‘Midnight Run’ Connecticut-Based Acting
Wednesday, June 2 by

Beethoven's 2nd robbed us of Charles Grodin, our nation's most cantankerous export back in 1994. A man can only abide a St. Bernard ruining his turkey dinner so many times before he decides to walk away from a thriving Hollywood career, and Grodin had reached his breaking point. Welp, I've got good news for all you Grodinheads out there. The man is open to acting again and he seems more curmudgeonly than ever."I’ve been led to believe by someone I won’t name that they will ask me and I will consider it,” says Grodin in regards to the planned Midnight Run sequel. Though he does have his conditions. “I just turned down the new Muppet movie… Jim Henson was dear to me but I’m not flying 6000 miles to Los Angeles to work one day." Well, you could also take in a Lakers game, B.A. Baracus. Just sayin'. It's reported that he won't take a role if it interferes with him being at his Connecticut home by nightfall. This reinforces my theory: Charles Grodin is a werewolf. I'm 17% certain of this. (Deadline)

Hey, Jeff Zucker. YOU’RE FIRED! Like On ‘The Apprentice’
Wednesday, June 2 by

In news that is sure to make Conan O'Brien's Irish eyes smile, Jeff Zucker is being removed from his position as President of NBC Television Group. General Electric has put together an exit deal that will send Zucker packing with a golden parachute in the $30 to $40 million range. Please send all sympathy cards to: Jeff Zucker Don't Send This Guy Any Cards Avenue Dude's Plenty Rich, NY 80085 $30 million seems kinda exorbitant for a guy who steered the number one network into last place and forced the company into the arms of a competitor. Heck, I didn't get squat when I was let go from the deli for that bologna joke fiasco. Sucks too because I had plans for that apron. (NY Post)

What Chris Evans Could Possibly Maybe Look Like as ‘Captain America’
Wednesday, June 2 by

AICN snagged some very official looking concept images of what Chris Evans could maybe possibly look like as Captain America. Marvel has not yet confirmed their authenticity, so basically they could be you or me, probably you, jerking around on the computer in a basement, surrounded by American flags and Nazi scalps. In which case, I commend you. That's an impressive collection of Nazi scalps.More unofficially official images of Captain America after the jump.

‘Get Him To The Greek’ Actress Zoe Salmon
Wednesday, June 2 by

Zoe Salmon was the host of the children's television show "Blue Peter." Shortly after her debut, she famously said, "I'd try anything once," which started a trend in her being asked to do dangerous or embarrassing things including wing-walking on top of an antique biplane. An antique biplane? What kind of dares are these?!A word from Zoe: "I'd try anything once."Oh yeah? Would you wing-walk on top of an antique biplane? Damnit, why does the mind go straight to that?More pics of Zoe trying getting her picture taken after the jump.

First Yucky Image from ‘The Walking Dead’
Wednesday, June 2 by

We have the first image of a whacked-out "Walker" from AMC's upcoming series "The Walking Dead." The six-episode first season is being written, directed, and produced by Frank Darabont (The Shawshank Redemption, The Mist)."The Walking Dead" follows a group of survivors trying to find a safe place for their brains after a zombie apocalypse totally puts the kibosh on lazy Sunday afternoons. Rick Grimes is the main character and Sheriff leading humans in the opposite direction of the undead in this tale adapted from the Robert Kirkman graphic novel. If this series isn't awesome, I'll eat my own shoe. Either way the jokes on you because my shoes are made of thinly sliced pastrami. (Collider)

Paul Rudd Is An ‘Idiot’
Wednesday, June 2 by

Nice shades. Idiot. (Very sorry.)We now have full license to refer to Paul Rudd as an idiot (though I am a big fan and hate doing so). The idiot (very sorry) is reteaming with Jesse Peretz for My Idiot Brother, a comedy where the dumbass (love your work) moves in with his three sisters and disrupts their lives.Shooting is slated to begin in July once the sisters and mother have been cast. This is the second collaboration between Peretz and Tardface (you're doing a fantastic job), having previously worked together on The Chateau. Rudd can be seen next in Dinner For Schmucks opposite a dweeby Steve Carrell (again, no hard feelings). (THR)

‘Crow’ Rises Again For Reboot
Wednesday, June 2 by

A series reboot of The Crow is said to be moving forward very aggressively. Not as aggressively as the high school bullies who will pummel the students the film inspires to wear pancake makeup, but aggressively nonetheless. Producer Edward Pressman was talking up the project, saying the script is terrific and they've got an offer out to a major actor. If all goes well, the reboot could be done this year.Director Stephen Norrington (Blade, League Of Extraordinary Gentleman) has switched up the visual look from its predecessor and made the Crow itself more of a character in this version. "It's got a personality and a character," says Pressman. I don't know about you but I'm really hoping it wears a backwards ball-cap, sunglasses, rides a skateboard, and speaks in rhyme. You snicker at that suggestion now, but you wait and see. Just you wait. (MTV)

James Cameron to Revolutionize the Way We Look at Catastrophic Oil Spills
Wednesday, June 2 by

In an effort to cap the massive BP oil spill, the federal government has called in none other than director James Cameron. Because of his expertise with "underwater filming and remote vehicle technology," Cameron, along with scientists and other experts, met with officials from the Environmental Protection Agency to discuss ways of stopping the colossal leak.Suggestions included sending a remote-controled robot back in time to kill the President of BP's mother before he was conceived and creating genetically engineered oil-human hybrid bodies which could then be used to interact with the spill and gain its trust.The federal government hasn't been this desperate since they sent that team of oil riggers into space to blow up that asteroid. But hey, I guess it worked out in the end. (HitFix)

Actor Quinton “Rampage” Jackson Says That Acting is Gay
Tuesday, June 1 by

Acting is gay, unlike MMA fighting. Nope, nothing gay about MMA.In an interview with the L.A. Times, thespian Quinton "Rampage" Jackson came out of the closet, admitting that "acting is kind of gay." The MMA fighter turned actor went on to say that some experiences while filming The A-Team were a waste of time and ended up sapping his manhood. "Acting is kind of gay. It makes you soft. You got all these people combing your hair and putting a coat over your shoulders when you're cold. I don't want a coat over my shoulders! I'm a tough-ass motherf*cker!" Now, if we read into Jackson's comments, he's basically calling Mr. T, the actor who originally played B.A. Baracus, a homosexual. While we're sure Mr. T is OK with gay, I pitty the fool who claims the T would lie with another man as one lies with a woman. If I were Rampage, I would quit my jibber-jabber before it's too late. (JoBlo)

Jerry Seinfeld Has a ‘Story’ for Broadway
Tuesday, June 1 by

He's conquered television, starred on the silver screen, and surfed the internet. Now, comedian extraordinaire Jerry Seinfeld has set his sites on Broadway….off Broadway, to be exact. Seinfeld will direct "Long Story Short," a comedic monologue by SNL alum Colin Quinn. The play explores "2,000 years of human civilization and the rise and fall of its great empires, stretching from ancient Rome to Walmart." It is hoped that Seinfeld's name recognition will translate to ticket sales. Most Off Broadway shows close after only a week, sending the vanquished cast members back home to flyover country with their pathetic hopes of stardom dashed. This is not Seinfeld's first encounter with the Great White Way. In 1998, he closed out his old stand-up routine with a limited run entitled, "I'm Telling You For The Last Time." In addition, Monk's Coffee Shop, the fictitious hangout for the "Seinfeld" characters, is located at West 112th Street and Broadway. Not too bad for a guy whose only knowledge of high culture comes from Bugs Bunny cartoons. (Variety) See video of Jerry Seinfeld's Broadway debut after the jump.

Rent Movies at Audio Visual Plus…If You Dare
Tuesday, June 1 by

Audio Visual Plus Local Commercial – Watch more Funny VideosAt Audio Visual Plus in Houston, TX, they think a movie about a sinking ship is a comedy and their staff plays around in unspooled celluloid. You know the guy with the hat is a frequent behind-the-curtain browser. Rip up your membership card immediately.Thanks to Brett W. for sending this over.We're up to our EARS in links! 5 Best Fight Scenes You've Never Seen (Moviefone) Jonah Hill On Hiding Drugs Up His Butt (Asylum) Details About Gary Coleman's Fatal Fall (PopEater) 25 Horrifying Hooker Mugshots (HolyTaco) James Bond Kissed a Dude? (FilmDrunk) Gallery of Awesome Custom Darth Vader Helmets (Unreality) 37 Photos of Heidi Klum For Her 37th Birthday (BroBible) Erin Andrews Has Some Nasty Feet (TotalProSports) UFC to Host First Indiana Show This September (CagePotato) Kristen Stewart Cleavage Pics (CelebJihad) 20 Hair Salons With Ridiculous Names (Smosh) 5 Celebrity Women The Universe Hates (Pajiba) Learn How to Be Tight (Atom) Date Movies to Get You Laid (MadeMan) 20 Examples of Douchebags Holding Money (RegretfulMorning)

Charlie Sheen Expected To Serve Jail Time
Tuesday, June 1 by

"So then I sez to her, I can pay to have you killed."People is reporting that Charlie Sheen will serve a minimum of fifteen days in jail for chasing his wife with a knife on Christmas Eve and threatening to kill her. That hardly seems fair. IT WAS CHRISTMAS. The most stressful time of year. Who here hasn't wanted/tried to kill their girlfriend/wife/sorority-girls-who-now-inhabit-your-childhood-home during the Christmas season? If you don't raise your hand, you're a liar.But don't worry. Charlie's time in the pokey won't prevent him from earning a multi-million dollar paycheck for spouting off lame sexual euphemisms before canned gasps, chuckles, and wolf whistles. The plea deal will allow him to serve his time before "Two and a Half Men's" shooting schedule reconvenes. Thank God! Not the real God that we all love. One of those sinister evil ones.