Michael Bay is calling bullsh*t on all of the following: TMZ reported yesterday that two men claimed they "got into a scuffle with a man they claim is Bay's private security guard" on August 24, 2008. (Yes, that's two years ago and they're just having a problem with it now) They were tossed out of a nightclub, at which time Bay's drunk security guard pistol whipped the living crap out of them, breaking teeth and bones, before fleeing the scene. Bay took time out from his busy kabooming schedule on Transformers 3 to set the record straight on his website. Check out Bay's response after the jump…
According to my super-secret source within Paramount Pictures (by that I mean The Wrap), director Brad Bird and Tom Cruise are about to begin casting for the role of Ethan Hunt's protégé in Mission: Impossible 4. While nothing is definite, Keven Zegers, Christopher Egan and Anthony Mackie are all vying for the part, although they may be in the running for other roles, as well.
After the failure of Cruise's last film, Knight and Day, Paramount was anxious to hedge its bets by bringing in another prominent actor to help draw an audience. By that logic, I really don't see why the studio passed over Tyler Perry. Diary of a Mad Black Warlord or I Can Do Baghdad All My Myself would have killed, and no one would have cared about the bad acting or cheesy plot. (/Film)
Zulay Henao from this week's Takers might just be the sexiest girl ever to hold a gun. A Colombia born, New Jersey-raised model, she had a 3 year stint in the U.S. Army, making me jealous of any guy that got stuck in a foxhole with her.
A word from Zulay: "I did a couple of humanitarian missions to South America, where I worked as a translator in orphanages."
Kids without parents have never been so lucky.
More pics of Zulay after the jump…
Rob Thomas, Jon Enborn, and Dan Etheridge, the creators of the intelligent and hilarious, so of course now cancelled, "Party Down" have sold a pilot to NBC. "Temps" will focus on a group of recent college graduates who are forced to take a variety of oddball temp jobs to make ends meet. It will be single-cam like "Party Down" and "Community" (shows you love), not multi-cam like "Big Bang Theory" and "According to Jim" (shows your grandma loves).
Thomas is also currently working on an outline for a show at Showtime. He told TV Squad, "Right now it's simply 'Untitled Rob Thomas Spy Show. It's set in the world of corporate espionage." That project is supposed to be dark though, not funny. At least not "Ha ha" funny. "Temps" better be ROTFLMAO funny, that is if NBC makes the pilot, the pilot tests well, they pick it up to series, it airs, and people watch it so it continues airing. Tell your Nana we need her support.
And I looked, and behold a pale cat: and his name that sat on him was Death.
Are you an aspiring screenwriter who's been trying to sell your story for years? Well this cat that lives in a nursing home beat you to the punch. How does that make you feel?
Oscar, the so-called "Death-Predicting" Cat, made waves back in 2007 when his story was published in the New England journal of medicine. Now, screenwriters Stephen Lindsey and Luis Ugaz are hoping to translate Oscar's horrifying story into box-office gold, and maybe a non-cat Oscar.
For those of you unfamiliar with the demonic feline, Oscar is a "therapy cat" who has accurately predicted the deaths of over fifty patients. The normally skittish animal regularly curls up beside patients who are near death and waits with them until they expire. What makes the story even more disturbing is the fact that Oscar was able to predict the deaths of patients who were considered healthy by the nursing staff.
Back in the day, if people caught wind of a cat that was clearly in league with Lucifer and his minions they would have put it in a sack and thrown it off a bridge. Today, we give it a movie. You call that progress? (Cinematical)
"Who the hell are you to tell me what to do?"
HBO has released a behind the scenes look at their highly anticipated new drama "Boardwalk Empire." The show is executive produced by Terence Winter ("The Sopranos") and Martin Scorsese, who also directed the pilot. Steve Buscemi plays the undisputed ruler of Atlantic City and town Treasurer, Enoch “Nucky” Thompson, who is described as “a political fixer and backroom dealer who is equal parts politician and gangster and equally comfortable in either role.”
Cutting to the chase, it's going to be some old school gangsta sh*t from the mind of a "Soprano's" writer and Scorsese. We've all been waiting for the next compelling drama from HBO (if you're a girl, I know you think that's "True Blood," but it isn't), and I have no doubt that "Boardwalk Empire" will make our Sunday nights a little less depressing. Then the next morning you can go into the office and give your boss the high hat and Charleston your way out of that joint.
Check out the featurette after the jump…
Thanks to author William Peter Blatty and the creative team that brought his novel to the big screen, The Exorcist brought the ritual of exorcism (and projectile vomiting) into pop culture glory. Since then, we've seen quite a few movies about demon possession, and on Friday, we'll see the latest – The Last Exorcism.
Forgive my cynicism, but I kind of doubt that it will be the last. After all, even after The Exorcist III, Morgan Creek Productions still felt it was a viable franchise and made not one, but two movies, almost exactly alike, with the same actor, as prequels to the original.
With that in mind, we created a little board game that you can play when you see The Last Exorcism, but, it'll be dark in the theater, so bring plenty of flashlights.
Good news for people who like Adam Sandler comedies (you know who you are). Katie Holmes and Al Pacino are in talks to join Sandler's new film, Jack and Jill.
Considering that their film credits include The Godfather, Glengarry Glen Ross, and Batman Begins, Holmes and Pacino make an impressive pair. But not nearly as impressive as the pair Sandler has lined up to write and direct the film, Steven Koren and Dennis Dugan. Their film credits include such classics as Evan Almighty, Grown Ups, and You Don’t Mess with the Zohan. Holy crap!
What the hell happened to Adam Sandler's movies? Back in 1995, I remember watching Happy Gilmore after school and laughing my ass off. But now, fifteen years later, it seems like all of his projects are geared toward 12-year olds. What changed? I can't wrap my head around it. (/Film)
Grindhouse has already been responsible for two spin-off films: Machete and Hobo with a Shotgun. Now Eli Roth has confirmed that he will bring that total to three with a full-length adaptation of his Grindhouse trailer, Thanksgiving.
I’ve been working on the script with my co-writer, Jeff Rendell, who plays the pilgrim in the trailer. And it’s me imitating Jeff’s voice [for the narration]. But Jeff has been working. I said that his deal is he has to work on the script while I’m promoting The Last Exorcism, and as soon as I’m done in mid-September he’s going to fly to California, we’re going to sit down, and bang out the script.
I guess it shouldn't be surprising that most of these trailers are being turned into features. Hollywood is already scraping the bottom of the barrel with adaptations of friggen boardgames. Thanksgiving looks like Citizen Kane in comparison. (Cinema Blend)
This is the video that played when the writers for the now defunct "Tonight Show With Conan O'Brien" were introduced at the Creative Arts Emmys this past Sunday. I would have accepted the job at Red Lobster if it were offered to me. Their cheddar dinner rolls are much better than TBS's. (Vulture)
And the Emmy goes to these links.
Eli Roth Talks 'The Last Exorcism', Satan, And Why No Gore (Moviefone)
NYC Man Lives In Bathroom For 5 Days (Asylum)
What Does Your Beer Say About You (Ranker)
25 Wonderful Roller Blading Fails (HolyTaco)
James Cameron Shows Off 3D Camera (FilmDrunk)
Hollywood's Deadliest Hitmen (Maxim)
Guy Saves Kid The Gets Arrested For 5 Year Old DUI (BarStoolSports)
5 New Mtv Reality Show Ideas (EgoTV)
Do It For Charlie Day (Pajiba)
Now That's What I Call Graffiti (Unreality)
Don't Do Drugs, Do Trainers (TotalProSports)
24 Amazing Mailboxes (Smosh)
23 Hottest Rockstar Daughters (BroBible)
Miley Cyrus Gets Spanked By Mom On Video (CelebJihad)
Meet James Tone's Secret Weapon (CagePotato)
Will Arnett Saved 'Arrested Development' Creator Says (PopEater)
Make Your Own Playstation Table (MadeMan)
Fox Searchlight has dropped the trailer for Danny Boyle's 127 Hours. James Franco stars as Aron Ralston, the climber who amputated his own arm after bring trapped between rocks for almost five days. It's one of those feel good movies. At least the parts with Kata Mara.
Simon Beaufoy, who also worked with Boyle on Slumdog Millionaire, wrote the screenplay, and has said that there is no dialogue for an entire hour of the story. Psssshhhh, nice job "writing," Simon. Can we get serious for a second though? I'm excited to see this film. I love the energy and unique storytelling of Slumdog, and I hope 127 Hours brings the same entertainment value without inducing too many cringes. Crushed appendages are just plain yucky. But fortitude in dire straits is yummy.
127 Hours hits theaters November 5, 2010.
Check out the trailer after the jump…
The kid stays in the picture! Of course, the "picture" in question is The Social Network, and by "kid" I mean a controversial coke party scene featuring Justin Timberlake. According to Vulture, the scene in question features Napster co-founder Sean Parker (Timberlake) at a party where two girls offer coke to guests via their naked breasts. One of the girls is only 17. Director David Fincher has decided to leave the scene in the film despite the fact that a researcher involved in the production has admitted it is almost entirely fictional.
Representatives for Facebook have taken issue with the scene as well, but are you really going to trust what they have to say? They also claim to do everything in their power to keep predators from accessing their network, but I've never received so much as a warning.
Diora Baird, arguably the sexiest woman on Earth, Elisabeth Rohm, and the not hot chick Harold Parrineau have been cast in 'Transit'. THR has more details but I'll preface this block quote by saying it doesn't expand on Diora's perfect measurements:
Antonio Negret is directing the drama about a band of thieves on the run from a bank robbery and the suburban family they come across during their escape. When the criminals stash their stolen money in the family's SUV at a rest stop, the road trippers unwittingly draw the murderous band of outlaws on their trail.
Note to thieves: don't stow your money in a location that has the ability to leave with it. A better option would have been to safely tuck it away in Diora's cleavage. Look, I'm sorry to go on about her, but the woman should be behind velvet ropes in a museum. Or a strip club. Whichever one allows greater access.
Taylor Lautner is howling mad at an RV company for not delivering his trailer on time. Get it? I said "howling mad" because he plays a wolf boy in those awful movies. *sigh*
At any rate, Lautner is so distraught over the matter that he has filed a lawsuit against the company, McMahon's RV, claiming both "annoyance" and "emotional distress."
On the one hand, he allegedly paid $300,000 for the trailer, so I can sort of see his point. On the other hand, he paid $300,000 for a trailer, and someday he'll use it to bang more chicks than I will ever meet even though he looks like one of the rats from those old Quizno's ads. When I look at it that way, I'm more inclined to hope the trailer catches fire while the rich, pretty boy, crybaby is inside. (TMZ via Movie Line)
Arielle Kebbel has been the go to pretty young blonde thing for D-List movies, from Soul Plane to this month's Vampires Suck. We don't hold that against her though because as you can tell from the above pic she is definitely hot, even if her movies sometimes suck. Vampires.
A word from Arielle: "I'm struggling to let go of you… This might be the hardest thing I'll ever have to do."
So many ladies have felt what you are feeling right now. All I can say is, time heals all wounds.
More pics of Arielle after the jump…
City Island starring Andy Garcia and Julianna Margulies releases on DVD and Blu Ray tomorrow, Tuesday the 24th, and Screen Junkies wants you to see it so we're giving away a 3-Month subscription to Netflix! You can add City Island to your queue and move it to the top spot above all that weird animated stuff and old "Murphy Brown" episodes you've been meaning to catch up on.
All you have to do is follow Screen Junkies on Twitter and tweet the funniest caption you can muster for the still frame above.
Contest ends Wednesday at 12PM EST. The winner will be announced via Twitter, Facebook, and on the site.
You can enter as many times as you'd like, but make your captions sing. Trust me, you want to jump on this new Netflix craze.
This new "Dexter" promo trumps the "Blue's Clues" style one we posted last week. It doesn't give away too much, unless you're naughty and haven't caught up on last season. If that's the case, leave the office right now and camp out in front of your TV all day. Then when you're finished, come back and watch this promo. It'll get you totally amped for next season, as Dexter is in for a world of sh*t. It's going to be fascinating to watch him deal with the spoiler that I can't discuss because you've got more important things to do than stay up to date on one of the best shows on television.
"Dexter" returns September 26th on Showtime.
Check out the promo after the jump…
All us lucky folks saw it at Comic Con last month, and now it's lumbered onto the internets for you to devour. AMC has released the almost five-minute long trailer for their new series "The Walking Dead." If this doesn't make you crap your pants than check your pulse because you might be a zombie. Frank Darabont wrote and directed pilot and is exec producing the series alongside Gale Anne Hurd, the producer of Aliens and Terminator.
AMC also announced that the show will premiere Oct. 31 with a supersized 90-minute episode. That's right, on Halloween night. It's a calculated effort to keep all you man-children off the streets on an evening that's reserved for kiddies. Or better yet, terrorize your neighbors early and then make it back to the couch with your stolen loot for "The Walking Dead" premiere.
Check out the trailer after the jump…
In 30 years, wearing 'Blueface' will be considered racist.
Good news for Avatar fans! You now have a reason to live for at least three-to-four more years (besides those yearly trips to Branson with your mother).
In an interview with the New York Post, director James Cameron said he's still in the "tons of notes" stage of his production of Avatar 2, and the sequel won't be completed until at least 2014. But it may be worth the wait, since the director plans on filming the third installment at the same time.
"Right now, the thinking is that [Parts] Two and Three are going to be done together," he said. "They'll be released separately, probably a year apart or maybe even two, but they'll be done in a bunch. I'm mapping out the story line right now, so there's a proper arc that plays out over two films but buttons nicely at the end of Two, so you don't get this horrible second-act/end-of-'The Matrix' feeling."
What a jerk! The only feeling I had at the end of The Matrix Reloaded was one of pure euphoria. Granted, I watched the film on a return flight from Mexico, and a condom full of "Blanco" had ruptured in my large intestine, but still. Cameron should keep his opinions to himself. (Cinema Blend)
Director Steven Spielberg is trying his hand at television (again) with an adaptation of the popular graphic novel series, "Locke & Key." Alex Kurtzman, Roberto Orci, and Josh Friedman are all on board for the project which is still searching for a network.
First released in 2008, Locke & Key revolves around three kids who end up watching over a secret, spooky New England mansion filled with mystical doors that transport them to different worlds and give them special powers (like turning into a ghost).
The source material was created by Joe Hill, the son of author Stephen King. Fans of "Quantum Leap" will remember that it was actually Dr. Sam Beckett who was responsible for inspiring most of King's major works. Considering that Hill was probably heavily influenced by his father, I think it's safe to add "Locke & Key" to Dr. Beckett's long list of time traveling accomplishments, right along side saving Jackie Kennedy and inventing the Heimlich Maneuver.
Godspeed, Dr. Beckett, wherever you are. (Vulture via Movie Line)
Doug Liman is officially on board to direct All You Need Is Kill, Empire Online is reporting. Based on the 2004 sci-fi novel by Hiroshi Sakurazaka, the film will follow the story of a soldier who is killed while fighting aliens, but finds himself caught in a time loop, reliving the events leading up to his death over and over again. With each subsequent death, the character improves his skills while attempting to break the cycle.
This really makes me mad. Warner Bros. acted like I was nuts when I pitched them my idea for a mash-up of Starship Troopers and Groundhog Day. They kept telling me things like "you're not authorized to be in here" and "put your pants back on." Well, we'll see who's crazy when they get a call from my lawyer, Robert Kardashian.
I prefer this version. It's less talky and John Williams's score on piano sounds quite foreboding.
Here are today's silent links.
Spike Lee On How BP Is Worse Than The Mafia (Moviefone)
New York City Alligators–From Sewer To Supper (Asylum)
8 Most Badass Flowers In Video Games (Ranker)
How To Make An Epic Chinese Traffic Jam Even Worse (HolyTaco)
4 Minutes Of Werner Herzog/David Lynch's 'My Son, My Son' (FilmDrunk)
Top 20 Movie Badasses (Maxim)
Good 'Ole Fashion Wilderness Brawl (BarStoolSports)
10 Books Lindsay Lohan Read While In Prison (EgoTV)
5 Instant Netflix Television Series Recommendations (Pajiba)
Two Obscure Actors In A Series Of Incredible Roles (Unreality)
Hiroshima Carp Catch Of The Year–The Sequel (TotalProSports)
Courtney Love's Twitter Meltdown (Smosh)
Rachel Bilson Tiny Bikini Pics (CelebJihad)
Firemen Ghost Ride Their Fire Engine (BroBible)
KJ Noons Isn't A Dirty Fighter; He Just Plays One On TV (CagePotato)
'Machete' Star Danny Trejo Gets Wild With Bloody Thirsty Pictures (PopEater)
Your Earthquake-Proof Bed (MadeMan)
Good news for people who like breasts and carnivorous fish! A sequel for Piranha 3D is officially in the works.
Despite a slower than expected start at the box office, the film did fairly well when considering its budget was only $30 million. Couple that with an overwhelmingly positive critical reception, and it's easy to see why the Weinsteins and Co. signed off another installment.
Since the fourth dimension is time, I'm assuming Piranha 4D will involve the piranhas taking control of some sort of water-based time machine and traveling back to the Old West. Unless, of course, they end up naming it Piranha 3D Part 2, which would just be stupid. (Cinema Blend)
Public Transit is a b*tch.
After letting Tower Heist sit on the shelf for almost four years, Universal has given it the green light with Ben Stiller starring, Brett Ratner directing, and Imagine's Brian Grazer producing. Because if anyone can make a project work that hasn't been working, it's the mastermind behind X-Men 3. Deadline has the deets:
Ben Stiller stars as the overworked manager of a luxury building who, along with other staff, lost their pensions to a Bernie Madoff-like Wall Street crook. It so happens that the fraudster is being held under house arrest in the luxury penthouse apartment upstairs, and the manager and four cohorts figure a heist will make them whole.
Bumbling, inept idiots try to pull off a major heist. Have we not seen this concept countless times already? And not that I have anything against Stiller, but I don't understand why he'd want to play this type of character again. He's already been a bumbling security guard twice in the Night at the Museum movies, and a bumbling (insert occupation) in almost everything else. Now he's relying on Ratner to save a stale concept. Unless that concept is a cupcake, I'm not seeing him succeeding.
For those of you who think the Bangladeshi Incredible Hulk was the last word in foreign made Hulk knock-offs, prepare to have your pathetic world shattered. Behold, the Indian version of The Hulk (a.k.a. Athisayan), from director Vinayan T. Rajendarum.
The clip below depicts a ten-year-old boy with Hulk-like superpowers who goes on a murderous rampage. He then commits suicide by walking into the ocean while his family looks on in horror. Pretty dark stuff for a film that bills itself as a family comedy. But in all fairness, it's still funnier than The Back-Up Plan and When in Rome combined.
Watch the Indian Hulk lay the smack down after the jump…
Previously on "True Blood": Bill met with Sookie's dream friends. Sam curb-stomped Crystal's redneck father. Lafayette and Jesus took said redneck for help. Eric got permission from The Authority to ice The King. The King ripped out a newscaster's spine and basically declared war on humankind. Ok, on to this week.
We finally learn what Sookie is courtesy of Bill: a fairy (or well, part fairy). The gayest of all the mythological creatures. Apparently all the fairies were thought to be extinct thanks to vampires hunting them down for their sweet, sweet blood. Sookie wants to know if this is why Bill likes her, and he's like, "of course not" but we all know different, right? I mean, did you see how easily he pulled stripper tail a few eps back?
More after the jump..
Gianna Michaels, like many hard working adult film stars, came from the fast food industry before being discovered for her natural talents. They have led her to several adult industry awards and a small part in Piranha 3D, where she is eaten by the carnivorous fish while parasailing nude, of course.
A word from Gianna: "I worked at a hamburger joint up in Seattle called Dick's."
I won't comment on the irony.
More pics of Gianna after the jump…
HBO, "Eastbound & Down," Kenny Powers, and Danny McBride would like you to know that Twitter's KFUCKINGP has nothing to do with them. For more than a year, a comedy writer from NYC has been posing as fictional washed-up baseball star Kenny Powers and delighting followers with his clever, very McBride-like tweets. He isn't McBride though, as the actor himself told Vulture:
"Kenny Powers is a full-grown man, so he would never Twitter. But Kenny is also a man of the people. He doesn't care if the public feels the need to impersonate him. That just puts him up there with the big dogs like Santa and Elvis. Knowing that it's a very funny committed fan makes us proud."
That's a burn for all you bloggers out there. You grown-ass men shouldn't share your thoughts, grievances, and lazy Sunday night plans with the world. Sure, Anonymous NYC Aspiring Comedy Writer found some success with it, but he sacrificed his masculinity in the process. Fortunately Screen Junkies has raw male power to spare, so we're always tweeting the sh*t out of sh*t on our account HERE!!!!
"Eastbound & Down" returns to HBO September 26th, and it's Kenny Powers approved.