You know when you put your hand in something really disgusting and you want to make other people smell it? That what Worst Of The Week is about. I get dog crap on my internet eyeballs and have to show it to others. But instead of actual excrement, it's a clip or a trailer from a movie that just should not have been made. A cinematic turd that makes you question why some people work so hard to make such garbage. This weeks video is a beautiful little gem called Salvaging Space. And looks really, really bad.
This weekemd you have the choice of watching a creepy devil child try to inhabit a beautiful brunette, or a grizzled old Eastwood battling some gangsters. Along with that, you have the premiere of the 7th season of 24, which will be awesome. The Unborn The Unborn Trailer 2 – Watch more Movie Trailer
From what I can tell by this poster, revenge is in fact coming. And it will be arriving on June 26th of this year, and it will have red eyes that look like they are back-lit by the bonfires of HELL. I'm not sure the best way to prepare for it, but I'm guessing everybody needs to be ready for SOME F'ING AWESOME EXPLOSIONS AND FIGHTING ROBOTS. Invest in fire extinguisher stocks, wash you're awesome-proof vest, and buy some new helmet polish: S$%& JUST GOT REAL. Here's some more news that we've been following.
A team of mercenaries head to South America on a mission to overthrow a dictator.Director: Sylvester StalloneCast: Sylvester Stallone, Dolph Lundgren, Forest Whitaker, Mickey Rourke, Jet Li, Jason Statham, Randy Couture (!)Release: 2010
Title: The Slammin' Salmon Director: Kevin Heffernan Cast: Michael Clarke Duncan, Kevin Heffernan, Steve Lemme, Paul Soter, Erik Stolhanske Synopsis: Former heavyweight boxing champ, Cleon Salmon, is the celebrity owner of an upscale Miami restaurant. In debt to the Yakuza, the Champ “inspires” his waitstaff with a one-night-only contest: Top selling waiter gets $10,000; lowest selling waiter gets his face punched in by the Champ himself. Genre: Comedy Release Date: January 17, 2009
Ninja Assassin follows Raizo (Rain), one of the deadliest assassins in the world. Taken from the streets as a child, he was transformed into a trained killer by the Ozunu Clan, a secret society whose very existence is considered a myth. But haunted by the merciless execution of his friend by the Clan, Raizo breaks free from them and vanishes. Now he waits, preparing to exact his revenge.Director: James McTeigueRelease Date: July 29th, 2009Rating: N/A
Generation Kill was the single most badass TV show of last year because it showed the totally f'd up circumstances that Marines had to deal with in Iraq. It had everything that a show needs. This movie seems similar, specifically with IED's. Here's the official synopsis:Forced to play a dangerous game of cat-and-mouse in the chaos of war, an elite Army bomb squad unit must come together in a city where everyone is a potential enemy and every object could be a deadly bomb.This movie is on my list of most anticipated films of 2009. No word on the release date as of yet. We'll keep you posted, Grunt.
Title: Street Fighter: The Legend of Chun Li Director: Andrzej Bartkowiak Cast: Michael Clarke Duncan, Kristin Kreuk, Moon Bloodgood, Neal McDonough, Chris Klein Synopsis: A live-action Street Fighter film that focuses on the origins of Chun Li and her quest for justice. How goofy is her helicopter kick going to look? This movie hits in February but we've yet to see an English-language trailer. Genre: Action & Adventure Release Date: February 27, 2009
Josh Brolin and Jeffery Wright were cleared of any wrongdoing in a bar fight that happened last july in Louisiana during the filming of W. TMZ has a video which we posted after the jump. The controversy surrounding the arrest stems from Wright being tased. Now, having seen this video, I kind of understand why they did it. He's putting up a bit of a fight as the cops try to cuff him, while Brolin bascally chills on his knees. I mean seriously, bros have gotten the blue shock treatment for WAY less, especially in the South. That and more in our morning news.
Synopsis: Luc Besson writes this follow-up to his 2004 Parcours-based film Banlieue 13 (District 13 here in the US). In the year 2010 the worst ghettos in Paris have been walled off. The French have decided to bomb Banlieue 13 out of existence. The first film was heralded for it's kinetic action scenes and the sequel looks to have more of the same. Releases Feb 18th in France. US release is TBD.
We are still in the days of TV experimentation, and tonight just may be the riskiest decision. Yep, we're watching Knight Rider, because it's been written up as being "nothing more than car-porn," or being "so delectably bad that you have to watch it just to tell your grandchildren that you were there," and because tonight's episode involves rescuing Vanessa Williams from terrorists. To cleanse the palate, VH1 is offering the 40 greatest pranks of all-time.
Defiance is an amazing story that suffers from a poor telling. It is mired in heavy handedness, never freeing itself to be anything other than a tale of revenge. With that said, there are some totally sweet battle sequences and good tough guy-ness on the part of Craig and Schreiber that make the movie a decent view.
Three Jewish brothers escape from Nazi-occupied Poland into the Belarussian forest, where they join Russian resistance fighters and endeavor to build a village in order to protect themselves and others in danger.
This recent addition of Randy Couture to the cast of Expendables put the movie in the running for an Oscar in the categories of Broken Arms, One Punch Knock Outs, Roundhouses, and maybe even Spinning Pile Drivers. With Mickey Rourke joining, the film will surely be in contention for Best Comeback, Best Supporting Steroid Habit, and Creative Accomplishment in the Category of Human Growth Hormone. This movie is going to be sweet. That and more in your morning news.
Synopsis: Former heavyweight boxing champ, Cleon Salmon, is the celebrity owner of an upscale Miami restaurant. In debt to the Yakuza, the Champ “inspires” his waitstaff with a one-night-only contest: Top selling waiter gets $10,000; lowest selling waiter gets his face punched in by the Champ himself. Release date is TBD.
This an exciting time for television afficionados. Yeah you're going to have to wait another two weeks for Lost or Battlestar Gallactica, so why not dabble in some new shows, right? Come on, its the 90's! If you're not the adventurous type, theres a retrospective Star Trek 25th Anniversary followed by Shatner's Raw Nerve with special guest…Spock! Homeland Security USA 8/7c on ABC Robert Deniro,Homeland Security – Watch more Free Videos
It seems like we get more Watchmen footage every week. At this rate we will have seen the entire movie by the time it's released. Which will be in 2012 because of the drag-out legal battle between studios over rights. Why does Hollywood always insist in getting in the way of our entertainment? And here's another thing: Why do the Japanese get new scenes in their trailers? I get SO angry at Hollywood for being un American. Commies. Hollywood: I'm watching you.
I would have a LOT of trouble competing in this event because I would just stop on the first girl and lay there. I'm saying this from experience. Man, I really miss college.
I use Comcast because of the no-contracts thing, so I have no idea how direct TV works. But I like the idea of being able to use my computer to pick what I want to record. One of the biggest problems with the interface I use is that searching for shows requires entering in words one letter at a time using the remote, kind of like registering a high score in an old school arcade game. I thought this commercial was actually OK. Very subtle. The future of TV is only going to be integrating it with your computer until they are the same entity (I know, BOLD prediction). My suggestion is that Comcast implement this feature and get the Dark Knight to explain how it works.
Title: Terminator:SalvationDirector: McGCast: Christian Bale, Anton Yelchin, Sam Worthington, Moon Bloodgood, CommonSynopsis: John Connor is facing a future that's not entirely what his mother laid out as he faces the robotic hordes of Skynet.Genre: Sci-Fi & FantasyRelease Date: May 22, 2009
From CAGE POTATO. One of the reasons that American Gladiators tanked is that it's just not violent enough. Watching people smack each other with giant Q-Tips on a padded pedestal 7 feet above waist-deep water is just not the same as seeing Kimbo Slice get pummeled in an octagonal cage. We are Americans. We need the specter of real injury in our competition. It looks like Gina Carano, one of AG's strong/sexy women might have some employment opportunities somewhere that won't be shut down after one season. Read the full story HERE.
Title: My Bloody Valentine 3-D Director: Patrick Lussier Cast: Jensen Ackles, Jaime King, Kerr Smith, Kevin Tighe, Tom Atkins Synopsis: Ten years ago, a tragedy changed the town of Harmony forever. Tom Hanniger, an inexperienced coal miner, caused an accident in the tunnels that trapped and killed five men and sent the only survivor, Harry Warden, into a permanent coma. But Harry Warden wanted revenge. Exactly one year later, on Valentine’s Day, he woke up…and brutally murdered twenty-two people with a pickaxe before being killed. Ten years later, Tom Hanniger returns to Harmony on Valentine’s Day, still haunted by the deaths he caused. Genre: Horror Release Date: January 16, 2009
Chelios faces a Chinese mobster who has stolen his nearly indestructible heart and replaced it with a battery-powered ticker that requires regular jolts of electricity to keep working. Studio: LionsgateRating: n/aRelease Date: April 17th, 2009Babes to Watch For: Amy Smart
It just absolutely boggles the mind that some movies get made. I feel like it's my DUTY to find these gems and let you know about them. It's not even 11AM on Monday and I've already found one that I think is going to be hard to top the rest of the week. Just sit back and ask yourself: what type of hooker debt did Lt. Chekov get himself into that he would need to be in a movie about a baby-octupus alien boy hatched from a dude's front-butt? And how did Cameron from Ferris Bueller take such a hard fall? Does he also have really bad hooker debt. Guys! You and your hookers. So many questions. So few answers, and even more hookers.
Title: Black Dynamite Director: Scott Sanders Cast: Michael Jai White, Salli Richardson, Nicole Sullivan, Mykelti Williamson, Mike Starr Synopsis: This is the story of 1970s African-American action legend Black Dynamite. The Man killed his brother, pumped heroin into local orphanages, and flooded the ghetto with adulterated malt liquor. Black Dynamite was the one hero willing to fight The Man all the way from the blood-soaked city streets to the hallowed halls of the Honky House. Genre: Action & Adventure Release Date: January 15, 2009
The Unborn follows the story of a young woman Casey (Odette Yustman) that's haunted by a menacing ghost-devil-child that threatens everyone in she loves. In order to stop the Nazi cursed ghost that gains strength by inhabiting people, Casey must travel to the terrifying unknown to end the curse forever. Michael Bay Produces!Studio: UniversalRating: PG-13Release Date: January 9th, 2009
It's the first monday of the rest of your life. We have a black president. Marley and Me is still dominating our box office. Despite the crumbling economy and the increasing probability that the rapture will occur in YOUR lifetime, moving pictures continue to be a profitable business. Netflix is going to be built into your TV. And Steve Jobs told the world that there is something wrong with his hormones, but that he will live. All of this in our morning news links. The future, dear Junkies, is a bright one.
I probably should have been a Ninja. Or at least a Korean Pop star who plays a Ninja in a movie. I have missed my calling. I blame my parents for never letting me go to Ninja camp or join the Korean Pop Star team in high school. This is a great behind the scenes vid of what goes into fight choreography in the production of Ninja Assassin, a film produced by the Wachowski brothers and directed by James McTeigue.The film stars stars Korean pop star Rain (Speed Racer) as Raizo, one of the deadliest assassins in the world. Taken from the streets as a child, he was transformed into a trained killer by the Ozunu Clan, a secret society whose very existence is considered a myth. But haunted by the merciless execution of his friend by the Clan, Raizo breaks free from them… and vanishes. Now he waits, preparing to exact his revenge.
Still hungover from New Years huh? Monday TV's got your back. Better make some three layer microwave nachos and watch the Fiesta Bowl, and then chill out with six whole hours of Lost reruns (you knew season 5 premiers in 16 days right?!). Only time cures hangovers (those pills at 7/11 don't work, believe me) and everyone knows that's best spent in front of your TV. The Fiesta Bowl: OSU vs Texas 5:15 on FOX Fiesta Bowl Boise State Vs Oklahoma – Watch more Free Videos
It looks like they let the guys from Jackass direct a film with Jason Statham in it. It's about that quality and has the same sort of camera work. But it's also totally badass. I liked the first Crank, mainly because of the scene where he bones the girl in the middle of a street. Also, this version has Dwight Yoakum. And Cory Haim. That automatically makes it more awesome. Crank 2: High Voltage Red Band Trailer – Watch more free videos