Amber Valetta stars as Angie in Gamer this Friday, but you may better recognize her as the machine gun-wielding killer in the very impractical outfit from Transporter 2. Pink lingerie, stilettos, and gobs of black eyeliner to blow someone's head off? It doesn't seem like the most accommodating attire, but then again, she might be using the sight of dewy side-boob to stun her victims before riddling them with hollow points. Apparently she plays the mom… Oopsies! A word from Amber: "I'm from Oklahoma!"And Rogers & Hammerstein give each other a posthumous fist bump, as their plan to turn the Sooner state's name into an expletive gets one celebrity closer to reality. Check out the Mother-Oklahomin' photos of Amber after the jump.
The new trailer for Scott Mann's THE TOURNAMENT hit today and we couldn't be more excited about it. The plot is simple: every seven years, in a small town, a tournament to determine the world's #1 assassin takes place. Believable? Nope. Awesome? Eff yes. If the trailer is a true indication of the tone of the movie, it's going to be, as ScreenJunkie Wookie Johnson put it, "SMOKIN' ACES without the gimmicks." You have to admit it's a virtual who's who of badasses all crammed into one actio flick: Marcellus Wallace from PULP FICTION? Check.
Director: Scott Mann Cast: Ving Rhames, Ian Somerhalder, Robert Carlyle, Kelly Hu Synopsis: Every seven years in an unsuspecting town, The Tournament takes place. A battle royale between 30 of the world's deadliest assassins. The last man standing receiving the $10,000,000 cash prize and the title of Worlds No 1, which itself carries the legendary million dollar a bullet price tag.
Despite the shortcomings of Halloween 2 at the box office this past weekend, Bob Weinstein has announced that Michael Myers will be back to hacking and slashing next summer will another sequel… in jaw-dropping 3-D. Weinstein noted that Rob Zombie won't be back this time around as they are going in a new direction with a director 'who has experience with horror'. Negotiations are happening now so the director could not be named. Let's start speculating. Alexander Aja or Neil Marshall would be interesting choices. Or perhaps John Carpenter would return to the franchise. Oh wait. This is a schlocky sequel that is unlikely to have anything going for it beyond it's gimmicky 3-D presentation. Better get those guys from the Saw movies. (Dread Central) Stab your brain with the knowledge contained within these links… Rambo 5!!! (/Film)Burnett and Lowry to ride again in Bad Boys 3. (First Showing)Nicolas Cage is going to get points on his license. (Empire)Seth Rogen's The Green Hornet pushes back release. (The Playlist)10 TV Shows That Should Never, Ever Be Made Into Movies. (io9)
The Men Who Stare At Goats Trailer – Watch more Funny VideosAbove is the brand new trailer for THE MEN WHO STARE AT GOATS, the based-on-a-true-story-and-a-bestselling-book flick that stars George Clooney, Jeff Bridges, AVATAR's Stephen Lang and Kevin Spacey as U.S. Army men who are part of the military's special program for paranormal soldiers. Lang can run through walls, Spacey is a psychic, Clooney can kill livestock with his mind, and Jeff Bridges is the party dude. Party down with these weekend links: Michelle Mayden Stretches Out Her Suit (Gorillamask) Read This Flowchart Before You Bang A Fat Chick (Holytaco) Robin Williams Returns To Sucking (Filmdrunk) 15 Sexy Twitter Babes To Tweet (Manofest) USB Crunching Rocky Bolboa Goes The Distance (Walyou) Rachel Weisz Lights Up 'Agora' Trailer (Pajiba) 5 Badass Movie Characters Who Are Real People (Cracked) Piven's Mercury Poisoning Is Bullshit (Heeb) 10 Signs You Might Be A Douche (Coedmagazine) 10 Awesome Predator Tattoos (Maxim) Girls Gone Wild Guy Sucker Punches Playmate (Celebjihad) How To Sleep With Your Teacher (Mademan) Mark Kerr Has No Chance In Hell (Cagepotato) Tarantino Reviews 'There Will Be Blood' (Unreality) 7 Worst Things Guys Do In Public Restrooms (Asylum) Lou Holtz Tackles Healthcare On Hannity (Moondogsports) First Person View Of Jet Crash (Nothingtoxic) Plaxico Burress' PSA On Gun Safety (Atomfilms)
Director: Grant HeslovCast: George Clooney, Ewan McGregor, Kevin Spacey, Jeff Bridges Synopsis: A reporter in Iraq might just have the story of a lifetime when he meets Lyn Cassady, a guy who claims to be a former member of the U.S. Army's First Earth Battalion, a unit that employs paranormal powers in their missions.
If you can't tell by the way she commands your attention in the above pic, Shantel VanSanten started out as a model. She's also done a couple of guest spots in TV shows, but this Friday she can be seen in The Final Destination, where her character Lori Milligan is sure to die. Come on, we all know it's going to happen. She's hot and she's not the lead actress. That means her character is as dead as glamrock, and when the sh*t goes down it's going to go down in glorious 3-D. A word from Shantel: "I am not a fan of horror films." Ummmmm… Eeeeesh… We're not quite sure how to tell you this, Shantel… But, you're starring in a horror movie this weekend. You know what, nevermind. We don't want to ruin the surprise. How about we check out more pics of you after the jump, instead!
Today we have two heavyweights of horror squaring off at the box office. Rob Zombie is back with another gritty entry of his HALLOWEEN II re-imagining. And Death returns with another grisly, innards-spilling adventure in THE FINAL DESTINATION. Both of these splatter fests are vying for your vote this weekend. But which will you vote for with your hard-earned dollars? The gentleman from Haddonfield or the old lion of mortality? The race has grown pretty ugly and to help you decide, we have smears ads from both candidates. Check them out and remember to vote at the multiplex. You can be the change that you want to see in the world.. First up, Michael Myers…
The new posters for Roland Emmerich's 2012 have been released by Sony and they are almost completely over-the-top. In addition to the Christ the Redeemer statue belly-flopping on Corcovado, another features a massive tidal wave dropping the U.S.S. John F. Kennedy on the White House (I'm hoping for a third where Mayans give us the finger). This really looks like more of the same from Emmerich; a man who has made a career out of destroying landmarks. Watch your back, Liberty Bell. (/Film) These links have an 80% chance of precipitation… George Clooney Stares at Goats in new trailer. (Cinema Blend)Rob Zombie to dirty up The Blob. (Dread Central)Apatow talks Anchorman 2, doesn't say very much. (Empire)Michael Bay hires fact-checkers for James Frey story. (Cinematical)Summer Glau infiltrates Dollhouse. (Pajiba)
If INGLOURIOUS BASTERDS can toy with Hitler history, then so can YouTuber "GhostsAndAliens," whose Fuhrer-riffic mash-up of DOWNFALL features Adolph's less than indifferent reaction to the news that the general population of movie fandom was more than indifferent about the AVATAR footage shown thus far. Here are some links which, like Avatar, probably look better in 3-D: Carin Ashley And A Robe (Gorillamask) Crows: Our Future Overlords (Holytaco) Spielberg Options Book Over Crichton's Dead Body (Filmdrunk) 20 Fat People Wearing Spandex (Manofest) Finally, You Can Pinch A Loaf In The Dark (Walyou) Bad Horror Movies Will Never Go Away (Pajiba) Excuses For Owning SI Swimsuit Issue (Cracked) The 'Bear Jew' Video Game Hits Hard (Heeb) Be A Good Pot Activist (Coedmagazine) Track How Fat You're Getting, Fatty (Maxim) Miley Cyrus Rockin' Short Shorts (Celebjihad) Robocop Riding A Unicorn. 'Nough Said. (Mademan) Rumor: Kenny Florian Vs Clay Guida At UFC 106 (Cagepotato) 15 Examples Of Dumbing Down Movie Posters (Unreality) The Manliest Restaurant In America Has Been Found! (Asylum) Titans Cheerleaders Bikini Runway Show (Bustedcoverage) Vols Ed Orgeron Will Sign FL Prep Football Talent (Moondogsports) Man Crashes His Nifty Scooter (Nothingtoxic) Cool 'The Final Destination' Poster (Filmofilia)
Krista Allen has been hot for a very long period of time, and continues to be hot. Maybe that's why she's playing "MILF/Samantha" in The Final Destination opening this Friday. We've seen Krista from all different kinds of angles, but we've NEVER seen her in 3D. Something tells us it could be the best use of a film medium that Avatar claims to have on lockdown. A word from Krista: "At a pool party, with everybody around, a guy and I had sex in the pool, but nobody knew it." Well Krista, we've got some news for you. Dustin Diamond was at that pool party, watching you, masturbating in the hot tub, and no one knew it (except us). Dustin doesn't have that moment anymore, but he does have hot pics of you after the jump!
In anticipation of THE FINAL DESTINATION, opening Friday, here's a heartfelt tribute to all the poor souls who met an early end at the cold, calculating hands of death.Music by Boyz II Men, who've experienced the same fate at the cruel hands of the music industry.Singing along is encouraged. Peace.
CHUD has alerted us to a video that may or may not be viral marketing for Cloverfield 2. For the most part, everyone is leaning toward not. As far as anyone knows, Matt Reeves is the intended director and he's got his hands full currently with his adaptation of Let The Right One In. So if this isn't a viral tease from the studio it must be fan-made. Which is notable considering the film came out over two years ago to mixed reviews. Yet some piece of it must have stayed with all of us because here we are speculating. Check out the video below.Wait a second… the voice in this video is clearly speaking Japanese. And we see a tricerotops fountain intercut with seemingly-unconnected flashes of a baby and what could be a giant monster. It all makes sense now. This is obviously a Japanese advertisement for soap. Stranger ads have come out of that country in the past. These links would never tease you… International poster for Jennifer's Body makes fine use of airbrush (Latino Review) Armored trailer lookin' good (Empire) New Avatars revealed (Cinematical) 'Rampage' Jackson will take no pity on fools. (MTV) Jet Li tired of sucking (Cinema Blend) Heathers: The TV Show (/Film)
Chimp exposed to Magic Goes Apesh*t – Watch more Funny VideosIt turns out that after the age of ten you have to be a monkey to still find magic fascinating. The bandana-sporting simian in this clip is literally going apesh*t over these tricks, and it's so damn adorable! The constant slide whistle sounds and florescent squiggly lines don't hurt the effect either. David Copperfield, I believe you've met your match. Bring on the wind machines and erotic monkey assistants! Vegas can't wait for this act! [via Buzzfeed] Lauren Jones And A Pink Bikini (Gorillamask) 7 People Who Will Be In Your English 101 Class (Holytaco) Soul Train: The Movie: Electric Boogaloo (Filmdrunk) 25 Sexiest Celebrity Cowgirl Photos (Manofest) Rubik's Cube For The Blind (Walyou) The Five Scariest Movie Clowns (Pajiba) 15 Most Baffling Boasts In The Rap Game (Cracked) 12 Dumbest Convicted Athletes (Coedmagazine) Maxim's 12 Hottest Swimsuit Videos (Maxim) K. Fed Looks Pregnant And Yellow (Celebjihad) Ed Hardy Must Be Stopped (Mademan) Emelianenko Vs. Rogers For This Fall (Cagepotato) 15 Toughest NES Games Of All Time (Unreality) Stop Masturbating So Much (Regretfulmorning) Jason Biggs Attacked By Monkey (Asylum) Texas A&M Football Talent Show Is Quite Gay (Bustedcoverage) 2009 AFC West Preview (Moondogsports) Idiot Breaks Back After Bridge Jump (Nothingtoxic) A Different Sort Of Beer Goggles (Atomfilms) New 'Jennifer's Body' Poster And Featurette (Filmofilia)
Lauren Jones And A Pink Bikini (Gorillamask)7 People Who Will Be In Your English 101 Class (Holytaco)Soul Train: The Movie: Electric Boogaloo (Filmdrunk)25 Sexiest Celebrity Cowgirl Photos (Manofest)Rubik's Cube For The Blind (Walyou)The Five Scariest Movie Clowns (Pajiba)15 Most Baffling Boasts In The Rap Game (Cracked)
By Robert Pattinson* When it comes to celebrities speaking out on political issues, many think we should simply shut up and act. However, I feel it is more important to be true to myself than to satisfy any preconceived notation of what a celebrity can and cannot say. So today I speak to you not as Twilight’s Robert Pattinson, the actor adored by millions of teen and pre-teen girls alike. Instead, I speak to you as Robert Pattinson, an individual who can no longer remain silent while a terrible injustice goes unchallenged from New York to New Zealand. Of course, I’m talking about so-called “statutory rape” laws. Governments continue to enforce these draconian mandates from a bygone, puritanical era, and I for one think it’s high time we put a stop to it.
Chihuanhas. That's right, Chihuanhas is an actual movie that's headed into production. The film's concept combines the two most vicious creatures on the planet; the Chihuaha and the pirahna, of course, and unleashes them on unsuspecting campers. Sounds like it could be fun. And I want one as a pet (as long as they don't eat the cat or jump up on the couch). (Dread Central) Nibble on these morning link vittles… Black Dynamite rolling through your town this fall. (First Showing)Should LOST swap out its writers? (io9)Ericson Core goes to The Xander Zone with xXx 3 (Empire)Final Astro Boy poster (Cinema Blend)Spike Jonze: The First 80 Years (/Film)Second season of Dollhouse aims to be good (TV Squad)
ZOMBIELAND International Trailer – Watch more Movie Trailers A lot of times, the international trailers for films end up being a lot more compelling than their North American counterparts. Take this new ZOMBIELAND trailer, for instance. More laughs. More clever kills. More of an indication as to what the movie's about. It's no wonder our kids are failing on international standardized tests when they're being subjected to inferior movie trailers. So after you fix the economy, healthcare and our educational system from the ground up, President Obama, maybe you could find a little time in your "busy" schedule to sit down with the trailer editors' union and figure things out. I believe the trailers are the fuuuuutuuuuuuure… And I believe these links are worthy of your eyeballs: Trisha Maree Has A Subpar Bathing Suit (Gorillamask) 6 Cash For Clunkers Spin-Offs (Holytaco) Landis And Pegg And Dead People (Filmdrunk) Ten Greatest Talk Show Fights Of All Time (Manofest) Hamburger Cushions Are Not Edible (Walyou) Shutter Island Gets Pushed Around (Pajiba) 6 Most Horrific Bosses Of All Time (Cracked) Top 20 Sexiest SI Cheerleaders (Coedmagazine) The Strapping Men Of The Rhine (Heeb) Risque '80s Scenes Are Soooo Fly (Maxim) Demi Lovato Is Almost Not Underage (Celebjihad) Snuggie Sutra: Screw In A Snuggie And Stay Warm (Mademan) No Justice In CA For Evangelista (Cagepotato) DDR Really Pisses This Kid Off (Unreality) What To Do When Your GF Queefs (Regretfulmorning) Slimmer Playstation For Fatter Gamers (Asylum) Gunshots Fired At Fantasy Football Party (Bustedcoverage) Jessica Biel Causes Malware (Moondogsports) Man In The Box and Hot Foreign Co-Worker (Youtube) Double-Obama Handles A Terrorist Interrogation (Atomfilms) David Fincher's 'The Social Network' In Works (Filmofilia)
Danielle Harris has been a part of the Halloween family since Halloween 4, and this Friday she's back playing Annie Brackett in Halloween II. Confused? Don't be! We're not messing with the space-time continuum, we're talking about a remake. (That's why two precedes four in this blurb). You may also remember Danielle as a little kid in the show "Roseanne." She was in the episode where Roseanne said something pithy and nasally and then ate her. A word from Danielle: "A lot of directors want you to rehearse, and I’m kind of anti-rehearsal." We feel ya. It TOTALLY messes with the give and take between two consumate professional actors. The best blood curdling screams come when you see the knife in the moment. Check out the pics of Danielle after the jump.
We're entering the dog days of summer and that means one thing, horror movie season is about to begin. Between now and late October we'll see a slew of horror flicks all featuring sweet young ladies alone in the dark. Here's a look at twelve actresses that we think have promising futures as Scream Queens… and a survey after that to determine who you guys think will rule the kingdom of horror for years to come.
At any given time Twentieth Century Fox has at least four X-Men movies in development. As of right now they are working on a Wolverine sequel, a Deadpool spin-off, How The Blob Got His Groove Back, Yo, Juggernaut!, X-Men: First Class, and the long-rumored X-Men Origins: Magneto. Now MTV caught up with David Goyer and he mentioned that things may be moving forward with the tale of a young Magneto. He also noted that the studio is interested in bringing more Origins to the screen. This doesn't sit well with me for fear of X over-exposure. Why must Fox run everything into the ground? My only requests are that they are careful when choosing directors and no matter what, no matter how tempting it may be. Do not cast any more Black Eyed Peas.These links won't funk with your heart… Hancock 2: Hancockier. (Empire)Mila Kunis dashes our hopes and dreams. (Cinema Blend)Behind the scenes footage of The Final Destination. (Dread Central)Steven Seagal: Lawman being sued already. (Reuters)Patton Oswalt talks Big Fan. (Latino Review)The Making of The Goonies. (/Film)
The new teaser trailer for INCEPTION, Christopher Nolan's follow-up to THE DARK KNIGHT, has hit the 'nets today after playing in front of INGLOURIOUS BASTERDS (for some of us). Being that it's a teaser and all, we don't get much in the ways of plot, but we do get to see how Nolan's toying with gravity and balance, which is the same thing that a giant bowl of unfiltered sake on a Friday night in L.A.'s Koreatown will toy with as well. But only one of these things will end with a karaoke rendition of Sisqo's "The Thong Song." Had Brett Ratner directed INCEPTION, things might be different. Watch the trailer after the jump. But in the meantime, enjoy 'deeeeeeeez liiiiiinks: Ashley Gets Down Lowe (and half naked) (Gorillamask) How Ghetto Is Your City? A do-it-yourself formula! (Holytaco) Bioshock Gets New Director (Filmdrunk) 10 Hottest Celeb Side boobs (Manofest) Steampunk Xbox 360 Mod Offers Vintage Finish (Walyou) Who Wants Another X-Files Movie? Not Me (Pajiba) 6 Bullshit Facts About Psychology (Cracked) 60 Scrum-tious Rugby Cheerleaders (Coedmagazine) The Fat Albert Prison Rape Episode (Maxim) Dark Knight Behind The Scenes Exclusive (Celebjihad) Write Your Special Lady A Love Song (Mademan) From Writer To Fighter (Cagepotato) From Movies To Paperback Books (Unreality) Beer Shotgum Attempt Ends In Vomit (Regretfulmorning) Clash Over The Flick 'Commando' Gets Heated (Asylum) D-Cups And Sports Events Don't Mix (Bustedcoverage) Nebraska Themed Hot Huskers In Hot Water (Moondogsports) Two Families Pick E.R. For Convenient Fight (Nothingtoxic) Filthy Fairies And Musical Mayhem (Atomfilms) Alba And Segal Are Finally Together In 'Machete' (Filmofilia)
Director: Christopher NolanCast: Leonardo DiCaprio, Joseph Gordon-Levitt, Ellen Page, Marion Cotillard, Cillian Murphy, Michael Caine, Tom Hardy, Ken WatanabeSynopsis: A contemporary sci-fi actioner set within the architecture of the mind.
Scout Taylor-Compton is back as Laurie Strode in Halloween II this Friday, and we have a feeling that Michael Myers is going to be pretty pissed about that. Scout did a great job portraying an ungrateful little sister in the first, what's that bullsh*t industry term again? Oh yes, "reimagining." And we're sure she'll have even more opportunities in the "reimagined sequel" to show her homicidal older brother just how much she hates his company. A word from Scout: "Howie Mandel is hilarious. He’s funny even when he’s not trying. I mean he could be talking about a Hershey bar and it would crack you up." You don't have to tell us that, Scout. We've watched Little Monsters so many times the VHS tape is worn out. So now we have plenty of time to ogle more pics of you after the jump!
This year marks the 40th anniversary of Woodstock, and the self-absorbed Baby Boomer nostalgia surrounding this “milestone” is enough to make the ghost of John Bonham vomit. To hear it described now, Woodstock was an event of biblical proportions where, somehow, almost a half-million people came together and peacefully co-existed…for three whole days! I’d like to point out that this happens everyday in Kansas City, MO, except with running water and an adequate amount of toilets. In an attempt to cash in on the anniversary, Universal Pictures is releasing Taking Woodstock, a film that chronicles the origins of this overrated historical footnote. Instead of watching this pandering nostalgia porn, I’ll be dropping acid (starting now) and watching these 5 Hippie Movies That Don’t Suck. Now, I should warn you that my landlord’s dog thinks I missed the point of most of these movies, but I think he’s just jealous because my baseball cap turned out to be rainbows. Oh God. STOP SHOUTING!
Steven Seagal- Lawman- Coming Soon – Watch more Funny VideosThe gods have been kind to us today. Here we have a first look at the new A&E reality series Steven Seagal: Lawman. Now that he's run out of C-Level rappers to co-star with, Seagal has been moonlighting with a New Orleans Sheriff's Department between film roles. And this fall we get to go on a ride along. Although the show is probably heavily staged, it's still more exciting than the alternative idea they were tossing around, Steven Seagal: Catsitter. You can take these links to the bank. THE BLOOD BANK. Zach Galifianakis goes to Dinner with Schmucks. (Empire) Supernatural Season 5 preview. (Dread Central) Shuttah Island gets pushed bahck. (Reuters) 30 Rock pornocized. (TV Squad) The many hairstyles of Nic Cage: A Celebration. (Latino Review)
Hey look! A guy in a Bumblebee costume speaking Spanish. No, not the one you're thinking of. This is mucho, mucho mejor. [via automotto.org]
YOUTH IN REVOLT Trailer – Watch more Funny VideosI knew he had it in him. I knew it! FINALLY, Michael Cera stars in a movie and… plays a different character than the one he's been playing in every movie prior. The above trailer from YOUTH IN REVOLT proves it. And not only does Cera play another character, but he plays TWO characters who interact with each other. Look out, Hollywood! I can see it now! Billboards touting Cera as "the white Eddie Murphy!" Interviews in which Cera switches dramatic personae on a dime! Pictures of Cera on PerezHilton.com with mac paint semen dripping out of his mouth! Michael Cera, welcome to the A- List.And welcome to Screen Junkies, A-List Links below:Tiffany Selby Splashin' In The Water (Gorillamask) The Best NFL Rap Videos Of All Time (Holytaco) Five Minutes Of Heaven With Liam Neeson (Filmdrunk) Tarantino Movie Babes Collection Is Full Of Babes (Manofest) Turn Your Mac Into A Fish Tank (Walyou) Lessons From College-Themed Movies (Pajiba) Don't Travel To Places With Culture-Bound Syndromes (Cracked) Miss Universe '09 Girls In Bikinis (Coedmagazine) Police Academy's 'Motormouth' Jones Is Still Making Noise (Heeb) Jan Terri Produces Worst Music Video Ever (Sickpigs) Lindsay Lohan Looks Like Brett Michaels (Celebjihad) Pressure Point Kill Guide T-Shirt (Mademan) Caption Contest: Win Tickets To UFC 102 (Cagepotato) There's A Point When Anime Boobs Get Too Big (Unreality) She Can Hide A Hammer In Her Bra (Regretfulmorning) Stripper On A The NYC Subway (Asylum) Hooters Bikini Car Wash In The Show Me State (Bustedcoverage) Google Search Results Are Craaaaazy (Uncoached) Andrea Garcia Is Muy Caliente! (Moondogsports) The Word Of The Day Is Sh*tfaced (Atomfilms) "9" Talismans And First TV Spots (Filmofilia)
Director: Miguel ArtetaCast: Michael Cera, Rooney Mara, Justin Long, Steve Buscemi, Zach Galifianakis
We couldn't be happier about the fact that adorable Alexis Bledel is coming to us as a Post Grad today. She's graduated from Gilmore Girls and is finally taking on roles opposite Michael Keaton. Her innocense intrigues us. In the dark recesses of our imagination we're hoping that Keaton had a conversation with Alexis on set and convinced her that as her next endeavor she should play a woman who's an exotic dancer by day and a stripper by night. It'll be a complex character study, but it's good for an actress to go against type. A word from Alexis: "For some unknown reason, bad-boys draw you in despite the fact that they are jerks."If watching NSFW videos and stealing Post-Its from the supply room is what Alexis considers bad, then she can hop on the back of our Vespa and hold on while we haul ass to Dairy Queen. Enjoy your Blizzard and check out more pics of Alexis after the jump!