Movies - Page 507

NEW ‘ROBOGEISHA’ TRAILER
Monday, August 17 by

You may remember that back in July we alerted you to RoboGeisha, the only film brave enough to broach the subject of stabbing people in the eyes with shrimp tempura. Noboru Iguchi's crazy Geishsploitation splatterfest is back with a second trailer and the awesome poster above. This movie just looks better and better all the time. Not only do the Geishas rock out to bad Paul McCartney covers but they can also continue to battle despite being sliced in two. Let's see Tony Jaa pull that off. (Dread Central) Peep the trailer and stick around for our morning links… ?????? / Robo-geisha (Trailer Two) – Watch more Funny Videos TV Host accused of killing for ratings. (Variety) Robert Downey Jr to play Lestat? (Empire) Sony rolls out plans for Spidey 5 and 6. (Cinema Blend) Hellboy talks Bubba Nosferatu. (First Showing)

TRAILER: ‘LAW ABIDING CITIZEN’ WITH JAMIE FOXX & GERARD BUTLER
Friday, August 14 by

LAW ABIDING CITIZEN Trailer – Watch more Movie Trailers Why is it that criminals always manage to kidnap or kill the family members of trained killers?  Have they not seen TAKEN? Crap, even Kevin Bacon, the "mild-mannered" executive in DEATH SENTENCE managed to get pissed enough to come back and kill off the ne'er do wells who murdered his kid.  (Okay, criminals, you get a pass on that one.  No one saw DEATH SENTENCE.)  But now we have LAW ABIDING CITIZEN, which stars Gerard Butler as a family man whose – gasp – wife and daughter are killed by criminals, and Jamie Foxx as the prosecutor who is forced into giving the bad guys a light sentence.  But here's the twist: Butler's character goes out for revenge SAW-style, and becomes the film's villain… while Foxx has to clean up the mess.  I don't know about you, but I have trouble buying Butler as someone to root against, at least based on this trailer.  Then again, I'm still waiting for Pixar to come out with their dog revenge fantasy where Dug from UP violently picks off Michael Vick and his cronies one by one after finding out Vick just got reinstated in the NFL. Here are your weekend links: Mandy Ashford Looks Good In Green (Gorillamask) Rick Pitino's Press Conference Doodles (Holytaco) Inglourious Plummers Would Be The Best Video Game Movie Ever (Filmdrunk) How To Beat A Speeding Ticket (Manofest) Boba Fett Plush Toy Most Adorable Bounty Hunter Ever (Walyou) The 5 Most Bangable Aliens Of All Time (Pajiba) How Indie Music Fans Pick Their Favorite Band (Cracked) 5 Reasons You're Not Dating Someone Smarter (Coedmagazine) Full House Alternate Intro (Sickpigs) Star Wars As Classic TV (Maxim) Larry King Is Hot (Celebjihad) Why Girls Cheat (Mademan) BJ Penn Won't Take On Diego Sanchez (Cagepotato) Funny People Cast Members Do Standup (Unreality) TV's Best Fictional Ad Agencies (Asylum) John Daly Drops Out Of PGA Championship, Releases Ballad (Bustedcoverage) Awesome Double KO's (Uncoached) The Most Awesome Rope Swing Ever (Regretfulmorning) Drink Like A Mad Man (Bachelorguy) Police Arrest Man With Gator Strapped To Back (Moondogsports) Why Did This Man Get Tased?  (Nothingtoxic) Pitch A Star Wars Fan Film To Olivia Munn (Atomfilms) More Wall Street 2 Casting News (Filmofilia)

Law Abiding Citizen
Friday, August 14 by

Director: F. Gary Gray Cast: Gerard Butler, Jamie Foxx, Leslie Bibb Synopsis: An everyman takes justice into his own hands when one of the murderers of his wife and daughter goes free after a plea bargain.  He sets his sights on tormenting the prosecuting lawyer that enabled this. Release Date: Octboer 16, 2009

‘THE GOODS’ ACTRESS KATHRYN HAHN
Friday, August 14 by

The girls from The Goods: Live Hard, Sell Hard are back today, which means I am officially screwed on the title-related joke front.  But that's alright, because today's girl, Kathryn Hahn, is funny all on her own.  The talented comedienne has been a bit player in tons of comedies like Anchorman, Step Brothers, and… um, Reservation Road.  That was supposed to be funny, right?  On the small screen, she is well-known for her time on "Crossing Jordan," where her role Lily was created specifically for her by the show's creator, Tim Kring.  I guess Kring saw that Kathryn had "The Goods."  COUNT IT!A word from Kathryn: "To be worked into a show that was in production and on the schedule, is an amazing stroke of luck."It's not luck if you have the looks and humor on par with Ms. Hahn.  (I struggled to not repeat "The Goods" joke just then; it's too easy) Check out more hot photos of Kathryn after the jump!

BEST ALIEN-ON-HUMAN KILLS IN MOVIES
Friday, August 14 by

In honor of the very violent District 9 [Check out our review here] we'd like to salute the films where extra-terrestrials make first contact… upside yo' head (and then you die). Below are 10 grotesque clips of the goriest instances of alien-on-Earthling violence throughout cinema.CLICK ON THE IMAGES TO VIEW THE VIDEOS  "WATER MY ASS! BRING THIS MAN SOME PEPTO BISMOL!!!" — ALIEN (1979)  JASON LEE VS. THE SH*T WEASEL — DREAMCATCHER (2003)  BILL DUKE CAUGHT IN THE CROSS HAIRS — PREDATOR (1987)

‘INGLOURIOUS BASTERDS’ COMIC STRIP IN PLAYBOY
Friday, August 14 by

CLICK ON PHOTO TO SEE COMICPlayboy and Quentin Tarantino have teamed up to create a comic strip adaptation of a scene from Inglourious Basterds with reports that the director hand-picked and edited the piece. Here's the scene in the director's own words, "Okay, so. The Basterds come upon this Nazi and he's like this real bad Von Trapp-hating motherf&*%er, y'know? So. And then Brad Pitt's all like, 'Listen David Hasslehoff. I's Aldo Raines and I didn't come all the way to Germany for the strudel. We's in the Natzi-killin' business and we's here for your scalp. Today the hills ain't alive with the sound of music, Colonel Clink-looking motherf%$^ker. They's alive with the sound of killin'.' So. Y'know? (*pause; grows quiet*) May I have another Orangina please, Scott?"SIDENOTE: It wasn't until just now that I realized comic book Brad Pitt closely resembles loveable drunkard Andy Capp. And enjoy these glourious morning links…Get your tickets for Avatar's sneak peek. (THR)Brett Ratner directing Youngblood, wants Robert Pattinson. (MTV)Zombieland poster, err.. posted. (Empire)Saw scribes return to television. (/Film)Hottie Abbie Cornish talks Sucker Punch. (First Showing)Build your own Batman tumbler. (Cinematical)

‘GENTLEMEN BRONCOS’ TRAILER, STARRING JEMAINE FROM FLIGHT OF THE CONCHORDS
Thursday, August 13 by

GENTLEMEN BRONCOS Trailer – Watch more Movie TrailersGENTLEMAN BRONCOS looks to be a bizarre but good time. The third film from Jared and Jerusha Hess of NAPOLEON DYNAMITE and NACHO LIBRE fame sets its sights on home-schooled children and fantasy sci-fi authors this time around with a couple of very funny people in the cast. Which features flying Conchord Jemaine Clement as a dickish author who plagiarizes his young ward. Clement's Ronald Chevalier is the ultimate hack. His advice to his students is that one "can add '-ainous' to anything and it becomes magical." Remind me not to sample his beef stew. Check out these afternoon links. They won't make your mother cry… Karli Madeline Operates Heavy Machinery…Kinda (Gorillamask) Email Exchange Between Somali Pirates (Holytaco) The Neverending Story Van Fight Story Never Ends (Filmdrunk) The 10 Hottest Boob-Flexing Videos Of All Time (Manofest) Transformers Cakes More Delicious Than Revenge Of The Fallen (Walyou) The 5 Best Salesman Characters In Film (Pajiba) 6 Cheap Acting Tricks That Fool The Critics Every Time (Cracked) How Men And Women Argue In Flowchart Form (Maxim) The Longest Crash In Star Wars History (Sickpigs) 5 Kick Ass Baseball Fights (Coedmagazine) Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Twitpics (Mademan) Kourtney Kardashian Pregnant, But Who's The Father? SATAN?! (Celebjihad) Cris Cyborg Is Sick Of The "Beauty And The Beast" Fight Talk (Cagepotato) If Fictional Characters Became Real (Unreality) Swine Flu Was Anticlimatic For One Man (Asylum) Alabama-Virginia Tech Preview, As Told By Drunk Cowboy (Bustedcoverage) A Gallery Of Freaks Of Nature (Uncoached) Deer Tries To Jump Over Fence, Doesn't Really Work Out (Regretfulmorning) Cuba Failing-There Is No Toilet Paper (Moondogsports)

Gentleman Broncos
Thursday, August 13 by

Director: Jared Hess Cast: Jemaine Clement, Sam Rockwell, Mike White, Michael Angarano Synopsis: A teenager at a fantasy writer's convention has his idea plagarized by a world-famous fantasy writer.Release Date: October 30, 2009

‘SPREAD’ ACTRESS MARGARITA LEVIEVA
Thursday, August 13 by

While we gave her the nod in our hot female grifters feature, we felt Spread actress Margarita Levieva deserved her own gallery because, well, she's ridiculously good looking.  The Russian-born beauty spent her early life as a competitive gymnast on the Communist Russia payroll before moving to New York at 11.  There, she went to NYU and worked as a fashion buyer for Assets London (we don't know what that is either, but for now let's just assume it's something important).  She's got few film credits to her name at this point, with her only notable role being that of Lisa P in the awesome Adventureland.  However, she's hot and her name is the same as a delicious drink, so we feel she's going places.A word from Margarita: "I’m not an insecure person, per se, but I just never saw myself as the girl who walks into a place and everybody goes, ‘Wow.’"Rest assured, if she ever walked into the Screen Junkies offices, we would let out a collective wow.  Then, we'd awkwardly stammer through directions to the office she should be in.  It's obviously not ours. Check out more photos of Margarita after the jump!

VIDEO INTERVIEWS WITH ‘THE GOODS’ CAST
Thursday, August 13 by

If you’v taken a second to stop touching yourself to thoughts of seein DISTRICT 9 this weekend, you may have noticed that there’s another movie opening Friday called THE GOODS:…

BRYAN SINGER REBOOTING ‘BATTLESTAR’
Thursday, August 13 by

Bryan Singer is in talks to bring a big screen version of Battlestar Galactica to theaters. Originally he was set to develop the television series reboot in 2001 but was c-blocked by the Taliban. The gig later went to Ron Moore and the rest is history. No word yet on the creative direction of the feature but let's hope it wraps up a little tighter than the new series did. I find it kind of odd that Universal is already rebooting a franchise that practically just completed its successful run. If this is the new norm, can we get a do-over on Transformers 2? (Hit Fix)Check out these morning links before they get remade…The Goods character posters are good. (Cinematical)Poltergeist remake actually coming to theaters. (/Film)New Dexter promo artwork. (Dread Central)Check out a clip of Timothy Olyphant in Lawman. (Cinema Blend)Facebook gets Ed Helms in over his head. (Latino Review)

RED-BAND TRAILER FOR ‘LEGION’
Wednesday, August 12 by

LEGION Red-Band Trailer – Watch more MOVIE TRAILERSThe new red-band trailer for LEGION hit the nets today and it looks like a winner so far.  Paul Bettany stars as a loose-cannon version of Michael the Archangel, who comes down to Earth against God's wishes in order to ensure the savior of humanity currently incubating in his mother's womb survives an onslaught of evil demons.  Phew. It's like the Catholic church rewrote the script for TERMINATOR 2 and managed to keep the badassitude.  If only the Bible had calculating-ass, glock-wielding angels and demon grandmas dropping F-bombs before tearing off people's faces, maybe I would have stayed Catholic. Maybe after Monopoly, Candyland and Battleship, a studio can give the Bible a much needed cinematic update (with a cameo from Brendan Fraser and music by Kid Rock, of course.)Here are your decidedly most unholy links of the day: Ashley Smith Appears To Not Own A Bathing Suit (Gorillamask)How To Get A Bartender's Attention (Holytaco)Neverending Story Van Lady Vs. Filmdrunkards (Filmdrunk)25 Funny Misspelled Tattoos (Manofest)Duck Hunter Minus The Classic Game Console (Walyou)The Worst Book To Film Adaptations Ever (Pajiba)23 Movie Plots That Could've Been Solved In Minutes (Cracked)Town Hall Internal Memos (Maxim)Jude Law's Baby Mama Photo Album (Celebjihad)The Cost In US Dollars To Fall In Love (Mademan)Brock Lesnar Ruins Bud Light (Cagepotato)When Video Game Characters Turn To Acting (Unreality)How To Properly Torture An Alien (Asylum)Amanda Is America's Hottest Community College Student (Bustedcoverage)The 15 Ugliest Soccer Players In The World (Uncoached)Rally Car Drivers Vs. Lake (Regretfulmorning)Zipline Tree Collision Prevents Man From Reproducing (Nothingtoxic)New Ninja Assassin Photos (Filmofilia)

Legion
Wednesday, August 12 by

Director: Scott Stewart Cast: Paul Bettany, Denis Quaid, Kate Walsh, Adrianne Palicki, Willa Holland Synopsis: The archangel Michael defends humanity from the apocalypse once God loses faith in his creations.  Michael leads strangers who are defending a woman pregnant with the second coming of Jesus.Release Date: January 22, 2010

MEGAN FOX IN ‘PEER PRESSURE’ PSA
Wednesday, August 12 by

Peer pressure in high school can be a real bitch, so kudos to Megan Fox for devoting a few minutes of her time to talk about what can be done to combat it.  Granted, the only peer pressure she probably ever had to endure in high school was Michael Bay's casting car wash, but Fox gives a no-holds-barred, uncensored and sure-fire approach for all the ladies out there who have to cope with the lascivious behavior of teenage boys… and if there's one thing we learned about Fox during our coverage of JENNIFER'S BODY at Comic-Con, it's that she's best when uncensored.  Enjoy.  And try not to get killed and eaten when school starts back up, guys.

‘BANDSLAM’ ACTRESS ALYSON MICHALKA
Wednesday, August 12 by

Not since the release of the latest Harry Potter movie have we really had to worry about oogling girls that may in fact be underage.  Then Bandslam came into our sphere of thought.  This features more "wait a second, are they 18?" babes than you can shake a stick at.  Since Vanessa Hudgens is proving to be a shameless photo hooker without our help, we felt it would be best to point you towards Alyson Michalka, the legal babe that somehow manages to not have nude pics of her turn up on the internet every six months.  Prior to Bandslam, Alyson's big acting job was on the Disney Channel series "Phil of the Future," but she also happens to be a platinum-selling recording artist with Aly & AJ, a band she started with her younger sister.  Plus, when she was 10, she won a Christmas card competition with Hallmark.  So, before she was legal, she accomplished more than 80% of the people reading this have as adults.A word from Alyson: "I'm always the crazy one at parties who will do silly stuff! I've eaten like five lemon wedges and then I had to drink a cup of sugar!"See, Vanessa Hudgens?  That should be the crazy stuff you do, not drink five lemon-lime Smirnoff Ices and decide to take photos of yourself in your birthday suit!  You work for Disney, for goodness sake!  Check out wholesomely hot photos of Alyson after the jump.

BANDSLAM
Wednesday, August 12 by

Director: Todd Graff Cast: Vanessa Hudgens, Alyson Michalka, Gaelan Connell, Lisa Kudrow Synopsis: A new kid in town assembles a fledgling rock band — together, they achieve their dreams and compete against the best in the biggest event of the year, a battle of the bands. Genre: Alyson Michalka Release Date: August 14, 2009

5 PBS HOSTS WHO NEED THEIR OWN MOVIE
Wednesday, August 12 by

Julia Child has been dead for five years, but this past weekend the PBS star was resurrected. Her biopic, JULIE & JULIA, took second place at the box office, a feat that is even more impressive when you consider the filmmakers watered down the interesting tale of Child’s life with the inane exploits of some shitty blogger (pot, kettle, black). The fact that Hollywood was able to turn a PBS star who looks like a tranny version of Herman Munster into box office gold is sure to get noticed, and if there’s one thing Hollywood likes to do, it’s run an idea into the ground. Since it’s only a matter of time before some desperate studio green lights a similar film, we here at Screen Junkies have compiled a list of the top five PBS personalities who deserve a movie. All we’re asking for in return is a producer credit and 10% of the domestic gross (and 20% of the international).  

FRANK DARABONT ADAPTS ‘THE WALKING DEAD’ FOR TV
Wednesday, August 12 by

The world's greatest zombie comic book is shuffling its way toward a small screen adaptation. The ridiculously rad Frank Darabont is in final talks to write and direct The Walking Dead for AMC. If you're unfamiliar with the books, the story centers on a group of strangers who must fight for survival in a zombie-infested world. Though the focus is on how we deal with one another once society and the creature comforts crumble, there is quite a bit of disturbing gore throughout. This is super exciting and Darabont is the perfect choice to helm. I'm also very excited that zombies will finally be brought to the small screen. The zombies on The Hills don't count because those are fast zombies. (/Film)Sink your teeth into these fleshy morning links…Studios line up for Kick-Ass. (Latino Review)LEGO is the latest toy-to-movie adaptation. What's next, Yo-yo? (Reuters)Astro Boy full length trailer. (First Showing)Miley Cyrus pole-dances. (Newsday)Jon Hamm interview. (AV Club)

LEAKED COMIC-CON ‘IRON MAN 2′ FOOTAGE
Tuesday, August 11 by

This was the hit of Comic-Con 2009, and for good reason.  There's nothing to say other than this is the only leaked footage of IRON MAN 2 that we've been able to find online. Oh, and people seated in large groups will eagerly clap at any use of the f-word.  Enjoy, and don't say we never embedded anything for you. When you're done watching Don Cheadle/War Machine kick ass, check out these links: Jennifer Copeland In Little To No Clothes (Gorillamask) What Her Drink Really Says About Her (Holytaco) There's a Kick Ass Bidding War For Matthew Vaughan's Kick Ass (Filmdrunk) 10 Greatest Cleavage Moments In TV History (Manofest) Light Emitting Wallpaper Is Purty (Walyou) 5 Bad Movies With Great Ensemble Casts (Pajiba) 5 Incredibly Impractical Sexual Practices (Cracked) Grandpa Is A Mac (Sickpigs) How To Date Out Of Your League (Coedmagazine) Miley And Noah Cyrus Pole Dance, Make People Feel Awkward (Celebjihad) How To Be A Millionaire Rock Star (Mademan) 10 Most Cursed MMA Events Of All Time (Cagepotato) 15 Classy Video Game Covers (Unreality) What Is The Manliest Drink Of All Manly Drinks? (Asylum) Streaker Arrested For Running Through Airport (Bustedcoverage) Whatever Happened To The Cast Of Just One Of The Guys? (Uncoached) This Sh*t Just Got Real, Really (Regretfulmorning)  Happy Birthday, Carolyn Murphy (Moondogsports) The Thrilling Conclusion To Sara's Class Reunion (Maninthebox)

REVIEW: ‘INGLOURIOUS BASTERDS’
Tuesday, August 11 by

Quentin Tarantino's Inglourious Basterds.  You have to think the movie would make Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen-amounts of money if every moviegoer were Jewish and an action movie aficionado.  While we at Screen Junkies are decidedly action movie lovers, we are also mostly of the gentile persuasion.  So, while we already have our Basterds tickets for opening weekend, we fully appreciate how gratifying the film might be all the more gratifying for someone whose family had to actually endure the atrocities of the Nazis. The idea of hearing a Jewish perspective on a movie that centers on Jews brutally killing a bunch of people who brutally killed Jews always had an interesting ring to it.  Luckily for us, our friends at Heeb Magazine read our minds, and passed writer Oliver Noble's review of the flick on to us for a gander.  As you can see from the beginning of Noble's piece, Tarantino seems to have nailed his key demo:

‘THE GOODS’ ACTRESS NOUREEN DEWULF
Tuesday, August 11 by

Another hot actress from The Goods: Live Hard, Sell Hard?  Crap, I already used a "she's got 'the goods'" joke yesterday with Jordana Spiro. Gotta think of another title-pertinent description for Noureen Dewulf… Oh, I got it: Noureen Dewulf is no "hard sell."  Goodness, that's brilliant.  The young actress first started gaining attention in the Oscar-winning short film West Bank Story.  Since then, she's had a steady stream of work that includes both film and TV, including The Ghosts Of Girlfriend's Past, Oceans 13, and "Chuck."  Did I mention she's gotten all these jobs in about a two-year span?  At this rate, expect Noureen to be huge in another two.A word from Noureen: "I think the most important thing women look for in men is a level of comfort in your life, if you're nerdy, be nerdy, if you're cool and super talkative, be that. I'm attracted to people who are comfortable with themselves and are proud to be that way."Maybe I shouldn't have written out that inner monologue about me struggling for a joke; that wasn't confident at all.  I blew what little chances I had with her already.  Oh well, check out more hot photos of Noureen after the jump! 

10 HOTTEST FEMALE GRIFTERS IN MOVIES
Tuesday, August 11 by

In SPREAD, opening this Friday, Ashton Kutcher plays Nikki, a high-end lothario who has slept his way into a life of privilege.  We haven't seen the film, but we're pretty sure that we'd rather it focused on Kutcher's co-star Margarita Levieva, if only to give us more screen time with her.  In the film, Levieva plays Heather, who turns out to be a grifter just like Nikki… and the plot thickens. But it got us thinking that Heather, no matter how good she is at swindling through sex, has got some pretty stiff competition cinematically speaking.  The following ten sexpots are Screen Junkies' picks for the 10 Hottest Female Grifters in Movies.   Angelina Jolie as Julie Russell ORIGINAL SIN (2001)

PEE-WEE HERMAN STAGES HIS COMEBACK
Tuesday, August 11 by

1980's nostalgia continues to boom as Paul Reubens has announced that he'll be dusting off the red bow-tie. The LA Times reports that Pee-wee Herman will perform onstage in Hollywood this November for a limited engagement at the Music Box @ Fonda. Perhaps if this run is successful it will lead to the big screen productions Reubens has been trying to get off the ground for the last nine years. The actor stated, "I've put part of him away for a long time but part of him has always been here with me. I think it will be like riding a bike — which is not a bad analogy for Pee-wee, by the way." Although his humor is off the beaten track, I'm glad that Reubens decided to pound the pavement and put this show together. His laziness was beginning to rub me the wrong way. On an unrelated note, I wonder if he listens to The Strokes?Check out these big adventurous morning links…Exclusive interview with District 9 director Neill Blomkamp. (Latino Review) Wolverine Goes To Japan. (First Showing)Design a poster for Triangle. (Empire)Courtney Cox will say anything. (Dread Central)Kathryn Bigelow gets some action in Brazil. (Cinematical)Tara Reid back on the sauce. (Cinema Blend)

MYSTERY TEAM SHORT: THE CASE OF THE HAUNTED HOTEL
Monday, August 10 by

MYSTERY TEAM Haunted Hotel Short – Watch more Funny Videos DERRICK COMEDY's new film MYSTERY TEAM opens nationwide in October, here's a new mini adventure to hold you over right now.  If you like to laugh at naive youngsters being put in awkward, potentially life-shattering situations (like we do), then you'll love "The Case of the Haunted Hotel," which debuted online today.  It's got alcoholic dads, political scandals, sex with minors, hush money and a floor made entirely of lava.  What more could you want?  Laughs? Fine.  Take them. Coinciding with the release of the short is the announcement of early screenings of the film in select cities, the schedule for which you can get after the jump.  Before you do, be sure to check out these mystery links: Shonda Lee Is Quite Hot (Gorillamask) If State Flags Were Honest (Holytaco) Joaquin Phoenix Is Still Acting Crazy (Filmdrunk) The Funniest Newspaper Headlines Of All Time (Manofest) Star Wars Golf Club Covers For Geeky Golfers (Walyou) Harmony Korine Makes Yet Another Really Weird Movie (Pajiba) The 5 Circles Of Baffling Web Comic Hell (Cracked) Kid Solves Rubik's Cube And Plays Guitar Hero On Expert (Coedmagazine) Billy Mays' Legacy Tainted By Cocaine Use (Celebjihad) How To Be A Real American Hero (Mademan) Fedor Disses Brock Lesnar And More! (Cagepotato) Classic Clips From Every Movie John Hughes Directed (Unreality) Which Dystopian Film Is Most Likely To Come True? (Asylum) Michigan QB Moonlights As A Coke Dealer (Bustedcoverage) A Collection Of Car Demotivational Posters (Uncoached) The 10x Bacon Turkey Melt from Subway Deserves Its Own Film (Regretfulmorning) The Booze Death Calculator (Bachelorguy) Katherine Heigel Gets Called Out On Her Comments About Hard Work (Moondogsports) Freak Eats Thousands Of Snakes (Nothingtoxic) The Legend Of Neil Episode 8: Neil Goes For Broke (Atomfilms) Frank Langella Joins Wall Street (Filmofilia)

SPREAD
Monday, August 10 by

Director: David MackenzieCast: Ashton Kutcher, Anne Heche, Margarita Levieva, Sonia Rockwell, Maria Conchita Alonso, Shane Brolly

‘THE GOODS’ ACTRESS JORDANA SPIRO
Monday, August 10 by

I'll get the obvious corny statement out of the way:  The Goods: Live Hard, Sell Hard actress Jordana Spiro does, in fact, have "The Goods."  Har.  She plays Ivy Selleck, love interest to Jeremy Piven's Don Ready and fiancée to Ed Helms's Paxton Harding in the film.  The movie looks racy, but expect Spiro to add a layer of class and beauty to the film (as far as we can tell, they gave all the dildo jokes to Will Ferrell)  Outside of the new flick, she's been keeping busy playing every man's dream girl: the tom boy sports writer PJ on the TBS series "My Boys."  Between movies about failing used car lots and TV shows about sports, it's safe to say Jordana Spiro should be the object of every American man's affection.A word from Jordana: "Basically my homework for the show was to learn how to play poker, watch sports and drink beer. It was really difficult."We're not exactly sure how she got a job that involved performing things that men do for fun, but we're guessing it had something to do with her looks.  We're also a little jealous of her.  Check out more hot photos of Jordana after the jump!

THIS THURSDAY!! ‘DISTRICT 9′ MIDNIGHT SCREENINGS!!!
Monday, August 10 by

 Anticipation is in the air as nerd boners stiffen and engorge across the country. The eagerly-awaited District 9 opens THIS THURSDAY AT MIDNIGHT and that means that YOU can be one of the first to see it. According to early buzz and our review, the movie is stellar. You should definitely stay up late to catch what looks to be one of this summer's best. I'd stay up to watch it but I've got to deliver my papers in the morning. It's my sworn duty and I intend to honor it. (District 9) Focus your eyeballs on these morning links… Some info about The Thing prequel. (/Film) Paul Giamatti replaces Sean Penn in The Three Stooges. (Empire)  Sum Dood cast as Green Hornet's Kato. (Cinematical) Salma Hayek totally unshaven. (Dread Central) Doug Liman is the new Hero of the Hudson. (Cinema Blend) Awesome scenes from G.I. Joe cartoon box set. (io9) So happy that Tuco made this list. (Pajiba)

‘I LOVE YOU, MAN’ RED-BAND CLIP: PAUL RUDD PUKES ON JON FAVREAU
Saturday, August 8 by
‘I LOVE YOU, MAN’ EXCLUSIVE DVD CLIP: BEHIND THE VOMIT
Saturday, August 8 by

I LOVE YOU, MAN – Behind the Vomit – Watch more Funny VideosEarlier this year, we put together a list of classic vomit scenes from film, prompted by the now infamous scene of Paul Rudd spackling his innards all over Jon Favreau.  The clip's taken its place in the pantheon of puke of film, and we've now probably watched the scene over a dozen times, because it's just so damn convincing.   And we were never quite sure just how the director John Hamburg pulled it off so convincingly… until now.The exclusive DVD clip – which appears on the upcoming I LOVE YOU, MAN DVD & Blu-Ray – above gives us an all-access glimpse behind the vomit.  The amount of work that went into making this happen sort of blew our minds.  It's like watching Peter Jackson constructing an FX shot from LORD OF THE RINGS, only instead of Elijah Wood waxing poetic about boysenberries with Sir Ian McKellan or whatever they talked about, you have ANCHORMAN's Brian Fantana projectile vomiting Campbell's Chunky Minestrone all over the director of the IRON MAN movies.  I LOVE YOU, MAN starring Paul Rudd, Jason Segel and Rashida Jones arrives on DVD & Blu-Ray Tuesday, August 11th, 2009.

IMAGINARIUM OF DR. PARNASSUS INTERNATIONAL TRAILER
Friday, August 7 by

Above is the first official trailer for cursed-but-dogged director Terry Gilliam's THE IMAGINARIUM OF DOCTOR PARNASSUS.  That poor ex-Python man just can't seem to make a movie without something going horribly wrong.  Before it was natural disasters shutting down THE MAN WHO KILLED DON QUIXOTE (check out the documentary LOST IN LA MANCHA to see what I mean) and this time is was the tragic death of the lead actor (Heath Ledger).  But like Dr. Parnassus, Gilliam wouldn't let mortality stop him, and not only kept Ledger in the film, but also added three others to round out the part of "Tony."  You can see Ledger plus Johnny Depp, Jude Law, and Colin Farrell all in the clip above, which was said to have made Frank Caliendo's mimicry boner explode. Okay, Junkies, here are your weekend links… If GI Joe Worked In Your Office (Holytaco) Mafia Hitman Says No To Channing Tatum (Filmdrunk) Fat People Breaking Things With Their Fatness (Manofest) Pillow With A Light In It Doesn't Seem Conducive To Sleeping (Walyou) Nathan Fillion Endorses Ryan Reynolds As Green Lantern (Pajiba) The Truth Behind "Real Monsters" That Fooled The Internet (Cracked) 10 Batsh*t Crazy Paula Abdul Replacements (Coedmagazine) How To Start Your Own Religion (Mademan) Edith Labelle Leaves UFC In Suspicious Fashion (Cagepotato) 10 Realistic Wonder Woman Candidates (Unreality) Phobias For The 21st Century (Asylum) Lamont Jordan On Las Vegas Hitlist (Bustedcoverage) 10 Amazing Time Lapse Videos (Uncoached) Extreme Water Sliding Should Be A Sport (Regretfulmorning) Chipotle-Flavored Beer? (Bachelorguy) Jessica Simpson Is In Full Meltdown Mode (Moondogsports) Old Man Gets Tazered At The Ball Game (Nothingtoxic) A Tribute To The 80s In Memory Of John Hughes (Atomfilms) Meryl Streep, Alec Baldwin, And Steve Martin In Romcom Together (Filmofilia)

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