Rocketman doesn't care if your military base is closed to the public. Here are your weekend links:25 Hilarious WiFi Network Names (HolyTaco)Buffalo Bills Coach Steamrolled on Sideline (TotalProSports)Douchebags Everywhere (TheChive)Taylor Lautner Gets Xtreme (FilmDrunk)25 Funniest Nutshots of All Time (SuperTremendous) 10 Best Stand-Alone TV Episodes of the Aughts (Pajiba)Tiger Woods Voicemail Slow Jam Remix (CelebJihad)Sex Mario is Freaking Us Out (Unreality)Kylie Bisutti – Before She Was an Angel (Asylum)Generate Your Own Tiger-Esque Sext Message (BustedCoverage)Fire Stunt Ends Badly (RegretfulMorning)Have Ambien Sex Like Tiger Does (MadeMan)Montoya and Stewart Almost Hug It Out (AllLeftTurns)Epic Ghetto Catfight (NothingToxic)Hot Twitter Chick (Atom)
Screen Junkies caught up with producer Mace Neufeld after he spoke at the Invictus press conference earlier today. Here's what he had to say about the next Jack Ryan project, which thus far remains untitled:Why did you go with an original script and not one of the books? "Well, we were out of books. Red Rabbit was the last one and we just couldn't seem to get a script out of that. The new management came into Paramount. They said, "This is a really valuable franchise. Let's try and restart it with a younger actor. The Chris Pine idea came up and hopefully that's what we'll be doing" Who did the rewrite? Adam Cozad. Hossein Amini did one draft and Adam is now working on another one. No title yet? No title, The Untitled Jack Ryan movie. Will you reboot his origin like you did with Sum of all Fears? No, no. We pick him up when he's on Wall Street. Do you have action set pieces in mind? It all starts with the writer. It really does. When you say, 'We need action, action, action.' The Jack Ryan movies have never been action films. They've been thinknig man's thrillers. Jack is referred to as a water walker because of his ability to jump ahead to a conclusion. We've always seen that in all the Ryan films. That's how we want to portray him. He's a teacher, he's a historian, he's a linguist and he's really smart. Would you shoot in Annapolis or DC again? D.C. probably yes. So there you have it. Seems like Paramount is pumped to deliver a quality Jack Ryan movie in order to wash the taste of Affleck out of our mouths. Eeewww. Tastes like almonds.
We reported earlier this week that Paul Greengrass bailed on the fourth Bourne installment after having a falling out with the cash-strapped Universal. Now it appears that Matt Damon is showing some loyalty, and sticking by his director's side.When Screen Junkies caught up with Damon at the Invictus press junket he told us, "I'll wait for him and when he wants to do one, we'll do it." When asked specifically is it Greengrass or no Bourne, the actor went on to say, "I've always said that, but I think it will happen. Just down the road. We don't have a script right now."With Damon holding on tightly to the hand of Greengrass maybe Universal will reach a little deeper into their pockets. Afterall, they need to hold on to the Bourne series like grim death if they plan on eating anything other than Ramen next year.
Katherine Moennig is known for choosing non-traditional roles, usually those that involve gender-bending. An example of this is her playing a lesbian on The L Word. Some girls can really pull off short hair. A word from Katherine: "The clothes are comfortable…but on a deeper level I learned that the competition between boys and girls isn't as strong as between women."Yep, I'm envisioning a pilot fight too. Check out more gender-bending pics after the jump.
With so much crime in the city, how do I teach these keeeeeeedz?! It appears Antoine Fuqua liked his breakout film Training Day so much that he decided to remake it as an ensemble drama and change the title to Brooklyn's Finest. Ethan Hawke plays the same character he did in Training Day, except now he's got more kids to provide for, and Richard Gere is an older, whiter version of Denzel Washington's Alonzo. Along with Hawke and Gere, the film stars Wesley Snipes in corn rows, Don Cheadle donning several different hats, and Will Patton, who's always awesome. Their character's stories interweave in a plot that's not unlike Crash's, but with more corrupt cops or something. Even though it's doubtful, maybe this film will steal an Oscar too.
DIRECTOR: Antoine FuquaCAST: Richard Gere; Don Cheadle; Ethan Hawke; Wesley Snipes; Ellen Barkin; Will Patton; Vincent D'OnofrioSYNOPSIS: Three unconnected Brooklyn cops wind up at the same deadly location after enduring vastly different career paths.
Here's a newly released still from Kevin Smith's upcoming Untitled Cop Movie (formerly known as A Couple Of Dicks). It's not official yet but it looks like the film will be given the watered-down title A Couple Of Cops. Buzz on this movie is that it is hilarious and I don't doubt that. Barring The Whole Nine Yards, Willis has turned in some funny performances in his career. And to see him and Tracy Morgan square off against gangsters should be entertaining. I am frightened by the thought of Tracy Morgan wielding the power of a gun and badge though. Frightened for our women. "Excuse me, ma'am. You have the right to remain silent and I have the right to make you pregnant. My d*ck is going to frisk your uterus." (via First Showing)
"NOM. NOM. NOM."Paul Thomas Anderson has announced that his next project will be entitled, The Master. He's cast his portly muse Philip Seymour Hoffman in the lead role as a charismatic man who creates his own cult religion. Many assume that this film will damn Scientology but Variety is quick to report:“The drama does not so much scrutinize self-started churches like Scientology or the Mormons, as much as it explores the need to believe in a higher power … and the point at which a belief system graduates into a religion.”Sounds interesting though I'm not too sure about the casting. Philip Seymour Hoffman is a great actor but I don't buy him as a guy who founded a church. A Church's Fried Chicken perhaps*, but not a church. (Variety) *he's fat
Director: P.T. AndersonCast: Philip Seymour Hoffman
Jenny Wade is best known for her role as Nina on the cancelled TV series Reaper. She's also appeared in all three Feast movies as Honey Pie. So basically, she likes to star in scary things. Except for Up In The Air. A word from Jenny: "I'm kind of one of those actors who never does it the right way."You sound like an absolute dream to work with, Jenny. Hey, let's hire that f*ck up actress.Oh wait, the pics after the jump explain her employment.
Steve Carell either has to pass a fairly large bowel movement, or his character in Dinner For Schmucks must wear a perpetual scowl. Here are the first set photos from the comedy, which on top of starring Carell and Rudd, also touts Zach Galifianakis, cinemas new bearded "it" actor.Dinner for Schmucks, a remake of director Francis Veber’s César award-winning 1998 comedy Le dîner de cons (Literally translated as “The Dinner of Dumbasses”), concerns a renowned publisher who encourages his friends to find the most pathetic guests possible for their weekly dinner party.Sounds like Thanksgiving at your house last week. OH SNAP! I'm sure this comedy centered around a riotous dinner party will bust more than a few guts (man, they just keep coming) when it opens July 23, 2010.Check out Paul Rudd, most likely also wobbling toward the crapper, below. (via Collider)
DIRECTOR: Jay RoachCAST: Steve Carell; Paul Rudd; Zach Galifianakis; Bruce Greenwood; Ron Livingston; Lucy PunchSYNOPSIS: An extraordinarily stupid man possesses the ability to ruin the life of anyone who spends more than a few minutes in his company.
DIRECTOR: Jim SheridanCAST: Tobey Maguire; Natalie Portman; Jake GyllenhaalSYNOPSIS: A young man "comforts" his older brother's wife and children after he goes missing in Afghanistan. But when her husband returns, she's got some 'splaining to do!!!!
If you’ve got to be fired, there’s no better person to break the news than George Clooney. That’s the plot of his new film, Up in the Air. He travels the country firing people for companies who can’t do the dirty work themselves, but he helps people get a new start and has fun on the road too. It made me think of the other movies about downsizing, and I came up with quite a list of diverse titles. Honorary mention goes to the TV series The Office, which has been chronicling the economic crisis in real time.In Good Company
DIRECTOR: Jake ScottCAST: Melissa Leo; James Gandolfini; Kristen StewartSYNOPSIS: A grieving couple find strange comfort when they take in a stripper.
In Welcome to the Rileys, Kristen Stewart plays a young stripper who uses her stripper powers to help a couple grieving the loss of their daughter. But isn't a stripper really just a Band-Aid for your problems? Shame on you Melissa Leo and James Gandolfini. You can't just jump ahead to the Eighth Stage of Grief — Adopting Strippers. You need to take the bad with the pole-dancing and crab-walking.The Jake Scott film will premiere at Sundance in late January 2010. (First Showing)More pictures of Kristen Stewart in various modes of undress after the jump…
The comedy troupe The Landline posted a new video on their YouTube page that doesn't shed the best light on Avatar director, Mr. James Cameron. Apparently, Cameron is really jonesing for some new effects to see his blue mutant cat people fully realized in gorgeous CG, and he's willing to go to extreme lengths to secure funding. The Landline members include Tim Martin, Charlie Todd, Michael Dubin, Jonathan Fernandez, Jill Donnelly, Jared Neumark, Ben Rodgers and Mike Antonucci. You can check out their YouTube page, and a slew of other funny videos here. James Cameron is Jonesing for Effects – Watch more Funny Videos
When Sherlock Holmes premieres this Christmas, you'll be able to shake right along with your favorite sleuth. Ten theaters across the country will use seats outfitted with D-Box Motion Code, which are mechanical cues that sync with frames of the film causing the chair to shake and stutter. Normally, you'd have to go to a furniture store for those kinds of thrills. Seats in theaters not outfitted with the code will shake as well. This is to simulate the ass-kicking Madonna's divorce attornies are probably giving director Guy Ritchie this very moment. (Cinema Blend)
They make the perfect stocking stuffers.
For his new film 'The Social Network,' David Fincher must have demanded that Justin Timberlake go back to his boy band roots…literally! The literally meaning that his hair is wavy again, just like it was back when he sang and danced as a glorified slave to a fat man with a record contract. In the film that chronicles the rise of Facebook (the site where you tell people who don't care that you're "so over" something insignificant), Timberlake plays founder Sean Parker.Eh, they kiiiiiinda look alike, but I'd say Sean's hair is more curly than wavy. Who's with me? Who's with me?! Anyway, I'm sure there's much more to come from the set of 'The Social Network,' but until we get additional news I'm just going to assume that the staunch and laborious Fincher is making Timberlake cry a river on a daily basis: "No, you're typing like a pussy, 'N-Suck!"(via DailyMail)
In an effort to promote their new film Mystery Team, Derrick Comedy has put together another fine video of bizarre and esoteric proportions. Don't Jerk Off To This poses the eternal question, if you and your friends found a picture of a bowl of fruit in a vacation home with a note that warned you not to jerk off to it, could you resist jerking off to it? Watch the video to find out what happens to the disturbed trio of comics. That is, if you can even make it all the way through. Mmmm, just like at that lucious, curvy pear… Click here to demand that Mystery Team opens in a theater near you.
Peter Berg invited a few reporters to spend the day on the USS Sterett so that he could discuss his upcoming board game adaptation, Battleship. Eyes have been rolling since the film was announced, but matters were made worse when it was reported that aliens would play the film's heavies. Berg defended this decision and elaborated on what to expect from the sea-faring visitors.The aliens are known as The Regents. They will be brought to the screen with a mixture of CG and live action.They aren't looking to take over Earth. They are looking to build a power source in the ocean so that they can return to their home world.The alien weaponry will not be futuristic lasers. It will be exploding ballistics-based, just like ours.Someone at some point in the film will exclaim, "You sank my Battleship!"So there you have it. No word on casting yet but Berg seems very clear about the movie he wants to make. It's a movie based on a board game. Looks like it's time to dust off my adaptation of Ants In The Pants. It's a mystery/thriller about these ants that get into some guy's pants. (Latino Review)
Nine Trailer 3 – Watch more Movie TrailersYeah, yeah, yeah, you don't want to see a movie about prancing and harmonizing, I get it. But let's not forget about all the hot chicks that are starring in Nine. Also, Daniel Day-Lewis is the lead, and I think we can all admit that Mr. Day-Lewis doesn't F around with subpar material. Take a look at the new trailer, which actually explains the plot instead of just shooting sequins and gams at the screen, and see if it doesn't change your mind. Do a little soft shoe routine while you click on these links. If Warning Labels Were Honest (HolyTaco) Degenerate Gamble Posts Ad on Craigslist (TotalProSports) London Club with School Girl Outfit Dress Code (TheChive) How Many More Twilights Will There Be? (FilmDrunk) 20 Mind Blowing Celebrity Houses (SuperTremendous) Ten Best TV Shows of the Aughts (Pajiba) New Tiger Woods' Mistress Comes Forward (CelebJihad) Ten Favorite 'Family Guy' Fights (Unreality) White House Party Crashers (Asylum) World's Coldent Undie Run (BustedCoverage) BMX Biker Meets Quaint Pond (RegretfulMorning) Secret CIA Magic Tricks (MadeMan) Drivers with Momentum Entering 2010 (AllLeftTurns)
Somehow Dre-son doesn't have the same ring to it as Daniel-son. And as you can tell from the above photo of The Karate Kid remake/re"imagining," it doesn't have the same look either. They must have photoshopped out the Hollywood producers giving each other congratulatory spanks on the ass.Apparently, Jaden Smith trained every day for four months with the film’s fight coordinator Master Wu, and they filmed a scene atop the Great Wall of China. Most likely his dad Will Smith, the guy from the Bad Boys movies, was with him every step of the way shouting, "Wax on, wax off, Jaden-son!" then giggling uncontrolably into the palm of his hand.Check out more pics of what's sure to be another slaughter of my fond childhood memories after the jump.
Director: Harald ZwartCast: Jaden Smith, Jackie ChanSynopsis: Dre, a skateboarding video game buff who is forced to move to China after his single mother is forced to transfer to the China for work. Of course, unable to speak Chinese, Dre finds it hard to settle in, and gets beat up by the local bully. Mr. Han (the Mr. Miyagi character), a maintenance man who spots Dre’s black-eye and offers to teach him both martial arts and Chinese, so he can defend against the students of Li Quan Ha’s Fighting dragon school of Kung-Fu.
Vera Farmiga's got a nice figure. You may remember ogling it in Running Scared, with Paul Walker's hands groping it, or in The Departed, with Leo DiCaprio's hands groping it. Now George Clooney's hands will get the chance in Up in the Air. A word from Vera: "I really don't feel a need to be famous. But I do feel a need to make a difference, to shed light on human emotion through acting."Not to use an outdated reference, but gag me with a spoooooooon. Cowabunga. Feel the need to make a difference with the pics after the jump.
The Hangover director Todd Phillips recently talked sequel with Entertainment Weekly without really giving away too many details. His script is reportedly half-finished (will the other half be improvised by Zach Galifianakis?) and is not set in Las Vegas. In fact, Phillips wants to distance the sequel from the plotline of the original.“What people loved about 'The Hangover' was not Las Vegas or the bachelor party but these three characters,” Phillips says. “I think you can take those characters and put them in other situations, and you don’t need the sell of Vegas and a bachelor party and all that other stuff.”In summation, you can expect a sequel to the possible Oscar contender that involves an adventure of some sort but no one has any idea what it is. Maybe they're searching for Mike Tyson's gold? I bet they're searching for Mike Tyson's gold. (via EW)
Let me get this on the table right now: I am not an economist. In addition, I don't read The Economist. If pressed, I probably couldn't give you a good definition of the word economist.But, I like movies. I know movies, and I know movies where there are guys looking for a big score (usually, they're not economists either). And, outside some of the more ridiculous amounts of money sought (cough, Swordfish) – there has been a slight upward trend of hauls of monies in heist films.You know what else has a general upward trend (or a drastic one, that real economists warn against)? The GDP – aka the Gross Domestic Product. Please refer again to the opening sentence before you read this: the GDP is a handy little way to say, "Look how valuable this country is."
Yesterday I showed you what Don Cheadle would look like as Iron Man 2's War Machine in toy form. And today, I offer you the film's teaser poster. Here we see Iron Man and War Machine in a Bad Boys-esque pose against a stormy sky. The War Machine armor looks pretty similar to Iron Man's save for additional weaponry and hydraulics. The suit may also be assless. It's very hard to tell from this angle.Jon Favreau has announced the first trailer will premiere in front of Sherlock Holmes, so be on the lookout for that later this month. And Ozzy Osbourne, please be advised to keep an eye out for royalty checks, as we are quickly approaching an Iron Man media blitz. (Yahoo)Click on the poster below to marvel at the larger version.
Babies Trailer – Watch more Funny VideosStudioCanal's documentary Babies takes a look at one year in the life of five babies living in Mongolia, Namibia, San Francisco, and Tokyo. This film is bound to get biological clocks a-ringing. So fellas, keep your ladies away from this one or you'll soon be up to your elbows in doody (not your own) and be forced to watch Yo Gabba Gabba (not ironically).Soothe your teething gums with these links… 25 Babes James Bond Has Boned (Holy Taco) Sacre Bleu! French Goalie Breaks Leg In Half (TotallyProSports) World's Greatest Sleeping Bags (TheChive) Leo, Tobey, and David Blaine are broin' out (FilmDrunk) 15 Fake Magazines That Should Exist (SuperTremendous) Spanish LOST Promo Looks Like Perfume Ad (Pajiba) The 2009 NFL All-Criminal Team (CelebJihad) Dragon Backpack: Badass or Super Badass? (Unreality) Get To Know Rachel Uchitel (Asylum) Jay Cutler Beaten By Small Children (BustedCoverage) Nine Ridiculous Lawsuits Filed By Inmates (RegretfulMorning) World's Strongest Beer – Penguin Suit Not Included (MadeMan) NASCAR Collection Funds College Tuition (AllLeftTurns) In Russia, Cat Fights You (NothingToxic) Drunken Teens In A Hot Tub (Atom)