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Columbia Pictures has released the teaser trailer for David Fincher's The Social Network. The minimalist approach seems to love the smell of its own farts. Utilizing voiceover and bold text, Mark Zuckerberg is called a genius and a prophet. He almost made Jesus status, but he has yet to walk on water. …Loser. Regardless, the film is directed by David Fincher which means it's mandatory viewing for humans.The film stars Jesse Eisenberg as Zuckerberg, Justin Timberlake, Andrew Garfield, and Joe Mazello. It hits theaters October 1, 2010. Check out the TEASER after the jump…
Jason Biggs, the ol' pie f*cker himself, is set to star in the film Grassroots alongside Joel David Moore, the guy who played Sigourney Weaver's lacky in Avatar. From SeattlePI: The film, directed and co-written by Stephen Gyllenhaal (Jake Gyllenhaal's daddy) is based on ex-Stranger writer Phil Campbell's book "Zioncheck for President." Grassroots retells Campbell's work with Grant Cogswell's quirky 2001 bid for Seattle City Council and support for the monorail expansion. In the past ten years, Stephen Gyllenhaal has directed a few TV episodes and movies here and there, but nothing of note. Unless you consider the "Uncharted Territory" episode of "Army Wives" something of note. The real question is, can he produce a monorail piece as prolific as this: I highly doubt it.
"Quit smiling, you bastard. Now I have to direct this damn thing."Good news for dorks everywhere, and bad news for Brett Ratner fans. Peter Jackson is on board to direct The Hobbit, according to Deadline. Warner Bros., New Line and MGM are currently in negotiations to bring the famed LOTR director back to Middle Earth.Jackson will take over for Guillermo del Toro, who dropped from the film earlier this year. Although it may prove problematic and costly for Jackson to step away from his current projects, a compromise seems to be eminent.The prequel to the LOTR trilogy will be split into two films, and will be shot back-to-back in Jackson's native New Zealand.
Later, bitches!Jason Bateman doesn't stand in lines for iPhones. He's Jason Bateman! Yesterday at the Grove in L.A., Jason Bateman cut a line of 2,000 eager Apple nerds to claim his very own brand new, shiny iPhone 4. Upon his departure from the store the Apple store, Bateman was booed by the pions who had to subscribe to line-waiting. Did some poor kid in the back get turned away because they ran out of iPhones due to line hoppers? Probably, but f*ck that guy. Celebrities get privileges that fry cooks don't. (Vulture)
Maria Bello is the blonde indie MILF from next door, as she has shown in past matriarchal roles in A History of Violence, Auto Focus, and The Cooler. With Grown Ups opening this week she may be playing second banana to Adam Sandler and his crew but she gets to have a couple of great boob popping moments as Kevin James's homegrown wife, Sally. She just can't seem to keep those things holstered. A word from Maria: "I like having sex on the stairs."But how will people get to the second level of your home? You should really think these things through first.More enticing pics of Maria after the jump.
Grown Ups PG-13, 98min., 2010 Cast: Adam Sandler, Kevin James, Chris Rock, David Spade, Rob Schiender, Salma Hayek, Maria Bello, Maya Rudolph, Colin Quinn, Tim Meadows and Steve Buscemi Directed by Dennis Dugean Screenplay Adam Sandler and Fred Wolf Throughout the 98 minutes of Grown Ups your brain keeps nudging you to just repeat these words: “It's no surprise, because it's an Adam Sandler movie.” Here we have a full-fledged cast of comedians from Sandler, to Kevin James, Chris Rock, David Spade, and yes, even the forever slave to Sandler movies, Rob Schneider counts as a comic, telling no jokes and just delivering kick to the balls or pie in the face moments. It's no surprise because it's an Adam Sandler movie. MORE AFTER THE JUMP…
Sylvester Stallone is reportedly looking to star in a film about the infamous NYC mobster, John Gotti, and is in talks with Gotti's son to develop the film. Stallone and "Junior" are rumored to be shopping around for a screenwriter who can bring the film to life.Possible titles for the Teflon Don's bio include Stop or My Don Will Shoot, Rocky VII: Rocky Goes Down in the 8th or We Kill His Kid, and Judge Dredd…Sentenced Me to Life In a Supermax Cause I'm a Murderous *sshole. (/Film)
I chose the most suggestive picture I could snap for Universal's Little Fockers trailer, and it doesn't even get across the actual horror that unfolds in the scene. The Paul Weitz-directed threequel to the Meet the Parents blockbuster stars Ben Stiller, Robert De Niro, Teri Polo, Owen Wilson, Blythe Danner, Jessica Alba, Laura Dern, Harvey Keitel, Barbra Streisand, and Dustin Hoffman. You can practically smell the money wafting off the screen. There's even a turkey carving joke involving someone's thumb. I won't tell you who, but he plays the neurotic klutz in all of these films. And most of the other films he does. Little Fockers starts raking it in at the holiday box office December 22, 2010.
Russian Flight Attendants in Bikinis – Watch more Funny VideosThe last time I flew, my stewardess, oh sorry feminists, my FLIGHT ATTENDANT looked more weathered than the plane's upholstery. From now on, I'll only fly Abna Nova, where the help has soapy suds in its various crevices. Guaranteed lift off. These links are in their upright and locked position.8 Shows Least Deserving Of An Emmy Nomination (TVSquad) Man Finds Fiancee In Gang Bang, Sells Ring On Craigslist (Asylum) 'Jerseylicious' Stars Are Nothing Like The 'Shore' Girls (PopEater) Jennifer Love Hewitt Is Doing Great (FilmDrunk) 25 Truffle Shuffles (HolyTaco) Behind The Scenes Pictures Of 'A Clockwork Orange'(Unreality) Which Playboy Hopeful Would You Rather See Naked? (BroBible) Two Chicks Make Out At The Angels/Dodgers Game (TotalProSports) Chicks on Choppers Pictures (Maxim) The Controversial Career Of Yoshihiro Akiyama (CagePotato) "Death Jokes" On The Anniversary Of Jackson's Passing (CelebJihad) Mickey Mouse Boobs (Smosh) Sean Connery Wants That Beaver (Pajiba) Johnny B. Homeless Faces Off Against Kenan Thompson (Atom) Horror Movie Hotties (MadeMan) 32 Ridiculously Amazing Asses (RegretfulMorning)
Matt Damon is talks to star in director Cameron Crowe's (Almost Famous, Jerry Maguire) adaptation of the memoir We Bought a Zoo. Tell us what it's all about, Variety: "Zoo revolves around a widowed father who buys a dilapidated zoo in hopes of making a fresh start. He and his children, along with a small but loyal staff, work to get the zoo reopened."Crowe's last directorial effort was Elizabethtown (faaaaaaart), so everyone's looking for another win from the coming-of-age master of Singles, Say Anything, and Almost Famous. Maybe Crowe should consider Tom Cruise for the part instead of Damon. He pulled a terrific performance out of him in Jerry Maguire, and Lord knows Cruise could use a career boost at the moment. I could totally see him running a zoo. A zoo full of little, angry Tom Cruises that cage walls and insist you keep up the facade that you're his loving and devoted wife.
THIS COULD BE YOU!!!!Ever feel like you're nothing but a nameless blur floating by in the background of your own life? Do you ever feel so insignificant and meaningless that the only taste that doesn't turn your stomach is corn whiskey or the cold barrel of a .22?? Do you like boxed lunches??? Well, good news!! Fright Night is giving you the chance to cash in on your unique passivity.Anyone who blends in nicely with a crowd in the Albuquerque area can work as background talent on the upcoming vampire flick remake. All you need to do is visit OnLocation.net and then show up. You may even get the chance to see Anton Yelchin, Colin Farrell, Christopher Mintz-Plasse, David Tennant, or Imogen Poots (tee-hee) from a distance while a 2nd AD berates you and the rest of the herd. It's still better than staying home and watching daytime television.
F*ck physics. Stripper-turned-model-turned-actor (actor?) Channing Tatum has attached himself to Will Dunn's sci-fi script, Ion. It's about a man who travels to different dimensions in an effort to find his reincarnated love. Wow, sounds like a compelling logline. I can't wait until they get into pre-production and realize they have no idea what the hell it means. We should have read the script before agreeing to this, you guys!The script is currently being shopped around to studios, with Fox 2000 already making an offer. So basically this project could possibly never happen, but if it does Channing Tatum will be in it. Or maybe not. Who the hell knows anymore. It seems the guy is attached to everything that involves a significant other dying. He should have just gone forward with his parkour movie. I could believe him as a dude who slips off a wall and smashes his face into concrete. And don't you dare say that's because I'm jealous! **Wipes drool from hair lip** (Deadline)
"I'll use this to bludgeon Sean Penn. Special thanks to the Academy."Those with dreams of seeing Daniel Day Lewis square off against Robert Downey Jr. with a bowling pin in one hand and a cleaver in the other may be out of luck. Or in luck if they're as delusional as Guy Ritchie. His Sherlock Holmes 2 Moriarty wishlist leaked and Double-D Lewis is perched at the top, followed by Sean Penn, Javier Bardem, and Gary Oldman.As awesome as it would be to see Lewis lord over all the criminals in England, it's highly unlikely that he'll take the part. Like anyone at the top of their game, he's super-choosy with his roles, and more apt to pick a part that challenges him on some deep level. And let's face it. The first Sherlock Holmes was pretty silly. We'll keep you posted on Moriarty casting as this story develops and would like to throw John Malkovich's name into the running. Seems like he'll be in anything. (Production Weekly)
She’s not just another pretty girl.
There's only one movie you're really dying to see this summer, and that's Christopher Nolan's Inception. I know you feel this way because I feel this way, and we're connected like E.T. and Elliott. Sorry you're so drunk right now. The alcohol helps me get through the day.Rolling Stone's Peter Travers was allowed to lay his eyes all over Inception, the lucky bastard, and a snippet of his positive review is now online. He said, in so many words, if you have brains capable of processing an intellectual and creative challenge you'll probably really like the film. Stupid heads, not so much.Check out Travers's spoiler free excerpt after the jump…
Salma Heyek is always a hot babe you can see at the movies whether its art house period drama Frida where she sports a unibrow, or action packed thrill ride Desperado. She can flex her drama and comedic talent with her two other well known assets. She'll be seen next as Adam Sandler's wife in the vacation reunion comedy Grown Ups. Kate Beckinsale in Click and now Salma. Lucky bastard… A word from Salma: "I think it's not a femme fatale when someone is not doing it to manipulate men or be like a black widow. She loves him. She does it out of love. She wants him so badly to stay with her."Who in God's name is running away from you?! He should be dragged through the streets and beaten. And then I will slowly move in as his replacement.More of Salma's finer things after the jump.
Like Tim Burton and Jon Favreau before him, it looks like Breck Eisner may have found his muse. The Escape From New York remaker is eager to re-team with his Crazies lead, Timothy Olyphant, and have him slip into Snake Plissken's iconic eye patch. Which was originally worn and sweated on by Kurt Russell in John Carpenter's film.Olyphant excels at kicking people's asses (usually while wearing a cowboy hat) on-screen, but I don't know if he's quite right for Snake Plissken. Plus, that eye patch probably smells really gamey by now. Keep in mind, this is merely Eisner's dream casting. Certainly not a done deal, as he himself pointed out to MovieHole:Creatively, he would be great for it. We have not yet discussed internally within the studio who will play Snake Plissken. There are many factors that go into those discussions. First and foremost, obviously, is the creative one. We can't make the movie unless we get the perfect Snake Plissken, and that's a tall order. There are very few guys that could do it. He would definitely be one of the guys who could. There is no question about that.Really? There have been no talks as to who will take the lead in the studio's blockbuster action movie? Yeah, right. Let's just poke out Gerard Butler's eye and get it over with.
We all wanted to grow up to be rock stars. And apparently rock stars wanted to grow up to be in the movies. Some embarrass themselves and decide against quitting their day job. But others actually aren’t half bad at the whole acting thing. There are many performances to choose from, but we decided to make matters easy for you and focus on ten of the top rock star performances on screen.
Jared Leto – Requiem for a Dream
DIRECTOR: Robert SchwentkeCAST: Bruce Willis; Helen Mirren; Morgan Freeman; John Malkovich; Mary-Louise Parker; Richard DreyfusSYNOPSIS: A group of CIA retirees become the target of their former employer, and must get back in the game in order to stay alive.
Robert Schwentke's film adaptation of the Warren Ellis graphic novel Red looks like The Losers recast for a CBS audience. It stars Bruce Willis, Helen Mirren, Morgan Freeman, John Malkovich (going full-Nugent), and Mary-Louise Parker as former CIA assassins forced into retirement. But old habits die hard and the boredom of retired life sets in, causing them to venture out on their own to murder-for-hire. And then when their old bosses try to have them killed, they reunite to take the fight to the CIA's front door. Why is the CIA always trying to kill its former employees? That hardly happens with any other profession. Better off safe than sorry though. That's why I've been systematically eliminating the customers from my boyhood paper route. That, and because of their ethnicities. HELEN MIRREN POPS A CAP AFTER THE JUMP…
M. Night Shyamalan is set to produce, with Chris Sparling set to write, Twelve Strangers, a thriller that involves a jury deliberating a case involving the supernatural. Ah see, now the picture makes sense. Sparling wrote Buried, the movie where Ryan Reynolds is stuck in a coffin underground for ninety minutes. There's also additional details on the script that Shyamalan is currently shopping around town. The other day we reported that Bruce Willis, Bradley Cooper, and Gwyneth Paltrow are set to star, but we had no idea what the project's about, except that it's probably something mysterious. Deadline enlightens us: "Bradley Cooper would play a father on a desperate search for his missing child. It might stray into Taken terrain, but the father taps into some supernatural powers to aid the search." Maybe he taps into the supernatural powers of Juror Number 5 in the aforementioned project. Whoa. Meta. A studio has yet to scoop up the script, but it's likely someone will bite. No exec wants to get their nose broken by Paltrow while Willis and Cooper watch from afar in horror.
OK Gos Danimal vs. The Muppetss Animal – Watch more Funny Videos
It's advantageous to be a Muppet in a staring contest. Stick with the video, it gets funnier as it goes along. Plus, Zach Galifianakis is in the background, and you love him.
You vs. These Links in a staring contest. Go!
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The new guy brought his own saddle.Remember All Quiet on the Western Front, that book you were supposed to read in high school English class but instead you waited for your teacher to screen the 1930, or 1979, movie? Yeah, they're remaking that and Harry Potter (Daniel Radcliffe) is set to star. Harry (Daniel) will play a young German soldier fighting in the trenches of France.This remake seems pointless considering the original already won the Oscar for Best Picture, the highest honor that can be bestowed on a film. But I guess with today's technology the filmmakers can really take those mustard gas scenes to the next level. Add some 3D and audiences would almost be able to feel their nervous systems shutting down. Right on, Innovation. Right on. (Variety)
Roughing it the same way our forefathers did.There has never been a more lucrative time to be a cat-sitter. With Twilight Eclipse set to play at the Los Angeles Film Festival one week before it opens nationwide on June 30th, eager fans have assembled en masse to get a glimpse of their favorite stars. In fact, if you stroll by there right now, you'll see a "tent city" built by the Twihards. Just like our early settlers. Though they're more likely to suffer from Pop Rox in their blankets than small pox.It's now being reported that 550 of the overzealous nut jobs will be rewarded for their stalking by being guaranteed spots on the red carpet at Eclipse's Thursday premiere. The lesson here is if you obsess over someone hard enough, you'll be granted close access to them. Now, who amongst you has Bieber Fever and an attraction to hunting knives? (DailyMail)
As I write this, John Isner and Nicolas Mahut are still playing the longest tennis match in history at Wimbledon. And if you've been watching, I have no doubt that your face is gone.
She may be Thirteen in ‘House’, but she’s One to many.
Jason Reitman has optioned the movie rights to the book Elliot Allagash. The private school satire, written by "Saturday Night Live" writer Simon Rich, tells the tale of a boy named Seymour Herson who is picked on until Elliot Allagash decides to be his mentor. It's unclear if Reitman will direct or just produce. Rich is on-board to pen the adaptation.Allagash is described as a “teen who regularly gets drunk and enjoys villainy.” What teen doesn't enjoy getting drunk and commiting villianous acts? When I was a teen all I did was guzzle Red Dog and tie damsels to train tracks. In fact, our gang's initiation required us to chug a quart of vodka and fasten our enemies to logs on the conveyor belt at the local saw mill. Now the big thing is drive by shootings. No imagination! (THR)
In honor of Bruce Campbell's birthday, Sci Fi Wire designed some Bruce Campbell's soup labels. Make sure you read all the fine details. I'm a big fan of the second direction on the can of Cream of Darkness: agitate with boomstick.Check out the labels after the jump…
Gal Gadot is someone to look out for in the coming years, as she has proven to spice up big budget action fare like Fast & Furious and this week's Knight and Day. Coming from the land of the Middle East, this fomer Miss Israel shows us why her country is land worth fighting over.A word from Gal: "It's fun playing the bad girl, since I'm always the good girl in real life."Actresses say that all time. If they're all such goody two-shoes then who's helping Lindsay Lohan rail lines off of toilet paper dispensers? Show some solidarity, Girls.More innocent pics of Gal after the jump.