A Guy’s Guide to ‘Twilight’

Wednesday, November 16 by

Cringe-Worthy Quotes

“About three things I was absolutely positive: first, Edward was a vampire. Second, there was a part of him — and I didn’t know how dominant that part might be — that thirsted for my blood. And third, I was unconditionally and irrevocably in love with him.”

Hi thirst for blood might be clue number one that you need to avoid him.

“I’m the world’s most dangerous predator. Everything about me invites you in. My voice, my face, even my smell. As if I would need any of that. As if you could outrun me! As if you could fight me off. I’m designed to kill.”

Edward is a very emo killer.

“Death is peaceful, easy. Life is harder.”

Bella Swan is pretty emo, too.

“And so, the lion fell in love with the lamb.”

OH NOT THEY DI’IN’T!