‘The Governator’ Will Be Back… IN 3D

Monday, April 4 by

Wow. Arnold Schwarzenegger is actually serious about this Governator project. When he announced the animated project last week I’d assumed that now that he was out of office, he was re-inventing himself as a subversive comedian and this was his first public stunt. But now he’s announced that in addition to a comic book, animated series, and internet programming that nobody wants to see, an unwatchable 3D film is also in the works.

The film will feature the voice of Arnold as he plays a superhero bent on destroying the forces of evil in the world. But not the real life terrorists because this is for the kids. Also, how can you sell them expensive 3D tickets when you’re shitting all over them?

When asked if The Governator would take on the likes of Libyan leader Muʿammar Al-Qaḏḏâfî, Schwarzenegger paused to think a bit. Said Schwarzenegger: “Who knows? I don’t want to make headlines, that means you won’t write about The Governator. That might be going in the wrong direction. But the way things are going, we may have a chance of selling our series down there.”

He then lit an expensive cigar with a hundred dollar bill before sexually harassing an intern from the animation company. When he realized the cameras were still recording, he quickly rebounded by saying, “Err… um, I mean… I’LL BE BACK.” And then we all laughed and had a good time because he said that thing he says a lot. (Deadline)

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