‘The Expendables 2′ Will Be PG-13 Because Chuck Norris Demanded It

Thursday, January 19 by
Thanks, Chuck! 

When watching the copious amounts of exploding body parts in The Expendables my first thoughts were a) AWESOME, and b) Sylvester Stallone should direct Final Destination movies. But don’t count on seeing as many disgusting death scenes in the upcoming Simon West-directed sequel, The Expendables 2. The film is going to be rated PG-13. Thanks to Chuck Norris.

In all fairness, sources say that Norris implored that only vulgar language be cut from the film. Stallone has also done his best to ease worries, “Our final battle is one for the ages. The PG-13 rumour is true, but before your readers pass judgement, trust me when I say this film is LARGE in every way and delivers on every level. This movie touches on many emotions that we want to share with the broadest audience possible, BUT, fear not, this Barbeque of Grand scale Ass Bashing will not leave anyone hungry…”

After a pause, he followed that statement with, “No homo.”

Look, the original film showed a guy dying by essentially having his head kicked off. Let’s hope that the sequel at least matches the over-the-top violence of the first. Otherwise, what will they put the emphasis on? Plot?!? (AICN)