We're stretching the definition of "news" here, but...

About four years back, someone (bin Laden?) thought that it would be a good idea to make a sequel to the uber-crappy Chris Farley vehicle Beverly Hills Ninja. Apparently going for "degree of difficulty" points, the investors decided that they wanted to shoot the thing in South Korea, because the investors were South Korean.

Further adding difficulty to the project was the fact that the star off the film, Chris Farley, has been dead for 14 years. No matter, David Hasselhoff is still alive (we think), and he was gonna pick up where Bennett Brower left off.

Alas, it was not to be. The investors had a falling out with the film's proposed producer, a scholarship recipient from the AFI. He may have been overqualified. Anyway, lawsuits ensued, and the quick and dirty is the film will never be made or see the light of day.

So that movie you never knew about, which was a sequel to a film people barely knew about, will never be shown.

Man, Friday news is just the worst, isn't it? (A.V. Club)