‘Showgirls 2′ Red Band Trailer is Porn Minus Penetration

Wednesday, February 24 by


Showgirls 2: The Return – Redband Trailer – Watch more Movie Trailers

Murder by dumbbell, tainted coke, nipples, and strobe filters. Showgirls 2 resembles the locker room at my local Bally’s Fitness. Don’t ask me why the janitor rapidly flicks the lights on and off in there. One second you’re checking your weight, the next second you’re the subject of a massive circle jerk.

Someone willingly gave director Marc Vorlander $25 million dollars to film a sequel to the atrocious Showgirls and it appears he spent most of it on the retro 45-second title sequence at the end of the trailer. Wow, Vorlander directed this piece of sh*t?! I knew that guy in high school. He’d always flick the lights on and off in gym…wait a minute. Bally’s janitor!   

These links want a lap dance.

The Most Racist Movies Ever (Moviefone)

Creepy Batma Burlesque Show (Asylum)

25 Sexy Snow Bunnies (HolyTaco)

6 Ways to Get Lectured By Internet Commenters (Uproxx)

Soccer Goalie Delivers Lethal Drop Kick (TotalProSports)

10 Movies Where People’s Heads Explode (Unreality)

Pudzianowski’s Next Opponent is a Fat Guy (CagePotato)

Best Video Game Sports Reenactments (Maxim)

Hot Alessandra Ambrosia Pics (CelebJihad)

7 Best Buddy Cop Movies (Pajiba)

Brangelina are Still Collecting Children (Atom)

Sexy Sprin Break Safety Tips (MadeMan)

Danica and Dale Jr. at War (AllLeftTurns)

 

Do you like this story?

More about...