Don't touch Gordon Gekko's things.

Here are your weekend links.

Jerry Seinfeld Roasts Larry King (TV Squad)

Items No Gangster Should Be Without (Asylum)

The 42 Greatest Old Spice Commercials Of All Time (Ranker)

The 6 Best Jobs For An Albino (Holy Taco)

Tim Burton Wrote A Poem About Johnny Depp (Film Drunk)

Check Her Out: Eleanor Gecks (Maxim)

Vice-Principal Pays Student To Masturbate (BarStoolSports)

Pornographic Pizza (EgoTV)

Ten Actors Who Will Never Surpass Their Earliest Roles (Pajiba)

Katy Perry's Banned Duet With Elmo (Unreality)

25 Sexy Roller-Girls (Total Pro Sports)

Upception (Smosh)

Andy Samberg Brawls Jack Johnson (BroBible)

Christina Aguilera Shows Her Nipples (CelebJihad)

'The Mexicutioner' Seems Nice (CagePotato)

James Franco Got A D In Acting Class (Popeater)

How To Be A Karaoke Closer (Made Man)