News - Page 47

At least it's not 'After.Life'.
Luke Grimes Joins ‘Taken 2′ Which Sounds Crappy
Wednesday, November 9 by

Awwwwww, man.

Insert your own fat joke.
Brett Ratner Steps (a.k.a. Waddles) Down As Oscar Producer
Tuesday, November 8 by

It’s not OK to make fun of people for how they were born, fatty!

Bizarro Waldo was found in Portugal.
If You Want To See A Photo Of Anthony Bourdain Naked On A Pool Raft, You Came To The Right Place
Tuesday, November 8 by

His wife was photographing him naked with another man. (Technically, that’s true.)

Alex Murphy was the impetus for the whole "Tai Chi marksmanship" movement.
New ‘RoboCop’ Movie Will Focus On How A RoboCop Is Made
Tuesday, November 8 by

Ingredients: One dead cop, sheet metal, and a lot of love.

Ratner better hope this guy doesn't catch wind of his comments. Also, how short IS he?
Brett Ratner Thinks “Rehearsing Is For Fags”
Monday, November 7 by

Also, competent directing is for retards.

This is the picture of Brett Ratner we're legally obligated to use.
Brett Ratner Just LOVES Eddie Murphy, In Talks For Another Project
Monday, November 7 by

Because we’re sure that a Ratner film getting a lukewarm reception was some weird anomaly that will never happen again.

Litvenko
WB Wants Michael Fassbender To Die Of Radiation Poisoning
Sunday, November 6 by

This should really be a crowd-pleaser!

deltoro1
Benicio Del Toro Offered The Chance To Grumble Through ‘Star Trek 2′
Saturday, November 5 by

He’ll flip the crew of the Enterprise, flip ‘em for real.

Elijah Wood wins Halloween.
Elijah Wood Is The Craigslist Killer… In ‘Maniac’
Saturday, November 5 by

Typical child star behavior.

She's still one of the five people I'm allowed to sleep with without my girlfriend getting mad at me.
Jennifer Lopez Might Play The Role Of A Lifetime…Carmen Sandiego
Friday, November 4 by

Maybe they should just issue an Interpol notice about a huge woman in a trench coat and a hat?

"Harrison Ford, if you let go you can prevent both 'Indiana Jones 4' and geting a really weird, age-inappropriate earring!"
Ridley Scott Will Direct A ‘Blade Runner’ Sequel That Hasn’t Been Written Yet
Friday, November 4 by

If you were a fan of the original ‘Blade Runner’, well…well, there’s always the possibility you’ll like this film as well.

MILF: Mutant I'd Like To (Fornicate With)
Fox Greenlights ‘X-Men: First Class’ Sequel (‘X-Men: Second Class’?)
Friday, November 4 by

We’d also accept X-Men: Double D

This witness was too scared to testify as to what he saw.
A Proportionate Response: Wife Smothered To Death After Smashing Husband’s ‘Star Wars’ Toys
Thursday, November 3 by

He told you not to touch them! And they’re “action figures” by the way.

The horse was scheduled to be euthanized, which makes this in no way objectionable.
Nude Girl Buys Horse, Shoots It, Then Resides In Its Corpse A La ‘Empire Strikes Back’
Thursday, November 3 by

Yeah, we got pictures.

This is harder than Sophie's Choice.
Tracy Morgan And Eddie Griffin Both Vying To Play ODB In Wu Tang Biopic
Thursday, November 3 by

This is more difficult than Sophie’s Choice.

Moments later, he bit through his bottom lip and there was blood everywhere.
Taylor Lautner Surprises Us By Producing, Starring In A Gus Van Sant Film, Reading The ‘New Yorker’
Wednesday, November 2 by

I still don’t know what a producer does, but it surprises me nonetheless that Lautner is capable of doing it.

He's got his own armor and everything.
Joel Edgerton In Talks To Grease Up For ’300: Battle Of Artemisia’
Wednesday, November 2 by

Are his abs up to the challenge?

Picture this but even nakeder.
Amanda Seyfried To Porn It Up In ‘Lovelace’
Wednesday, November 2 by

She’s the new Heather Graham.

If you saw this picture and thought "Tyler Perry," you're a horrible racist.
Manure Prices Plummet, Movie Ticket Prices Drop Accordingly
Tuesday, November 1 by

If you saw this picture and thought “Tyler Perry,” you’re a horrible racist.

How'd this ever get canceled?
‘Green Lantern’s’ Martin Campbell Reduced To Directing ‘The Fall Guy’
Tuesday, November 1 by

Seriously. ‘The Fall Guy’?

Even in animated form, Reynolds absolutely OWNS the blazer/turtleneck look.
Sterling Archer’s Hero, Burt Reynolds, To Appear In Season 3
Monday, October 31 by

Burt Reynolds will play a guy trying to sleep with Archer’s mom.

"When do we roll?"
John Goodman To Pull A Piece On The Coen Bros’ ‘Inside Llewyn Davis’
Monday, October 31 by

Things are going to get loud and sweaty.

Jeez, you get your client a gig saluting ONE brutal dictator and this is the thanks you get?
Hilary Swank Fires Manager Over The Whole Tyrannical Dictator Birthday Party Thing
Monday, October 31 by

Jeez, you get your client a gig saluting ONE brutal dictator and this is the thanks you get?

justin-timberlake-snl
Justin Timberlake To Get Folky With The Coens?
Saturday, October 29 by

He’s bringing folksy back.

Oh, man! I know for a fact that Kevin Sorbo HATES being trapped in coffins, so this should be awesome!
Shameless Plug: Watch This Trailer For ‘Coffin’ Or I’ll Kill You
Friday, October 28 by

Your studio apartment doesn’t seem so small anymore, does it?

He's the anti-Sheen. He represents all that is good and pure in this world.
Bill Murray To Be The Yin To Charlie Sheen’s F*cked-Up Yang In ‘Charles Swan’
Friday, October 28 by

Now if they could just get rid of Charlie Sheen.

Who in their right mind wouldn't want to tell this story?
Craig Gillespie On ‘Pride And Prejudice And Zombies’: “I’m Out This Bitch!”
Friday, October 28 by

Just put Edgar Wright on it and call it a day.

He's gonna need to make a run and buy some more fame juice.
Charlie Sheen And His New TV Show Get Picked Up By FX
Thursday, October 27 by

My research hasn’t turned up any signs of Chuck Lorre’s involvement in the show.

His girlfriend is a vegetarian, which pretty much makes him a vegetarian, too.
Samuel L. Jackson Is Hollywood’s Highest-Grossing Actor
Thursday, October 27 by

And that’s not even considering all the money he makes from wearing Kangol hats and laughing uproariously at the Oscars.

With Jim Carrey and Jeff Daniels and everything!
Farrelly Brothers Plan A Legitmate Sequel To ‘Dumb And Dumber’
Thursday, October 27 by

With Jim Carrey and Jeff Daniels and everything!