Okay. Simmer down. We did ‘Prometheus’.
Just be thankful he beat Rob Schneider to it.
The balls will be played by Andy Serkis.
I didn’t see him wash his hands once.
Our moms will still get the two mixed up though.
Neither are a good idea.
Not THAT Masturbating Bear.
Come to think of it, he does throw off ‘Simple Jack’ vibes.
And they are quickly replaced.
Albeit a tiny version.
They can’t get enough of the stuff.
At least it can’t be any worse than the original.
Dress classy, dance cheesy, shoot first.
If we choose to go see it, that is.
Move over, Marmaduke, there’s a new obnoxious CGI talking animal in town.
Like the dialogue in these movies even matters.
The sanctity of ‘Transformers 4′ is being threatened with commercialism.
‘Scary Movie’ brings more good into the world.
Be careful what you wish for…
Sweet land of liberty.
Move over, Rob Zombie.
Emancipation is today’s secret word!
I’ll hold judgement until I see a Photoshop of him riding a unicorn.
I spelled “theaters” the British way for thematic consistency.
Remember Bumblebee? Well this is Caterpillar. He’s mischievous and fun. Buy his toy.
Del Toro gets dicked over again.
“Boomtown, Population: *Kablamow!*”