News - Page 23

At least the thank you speeches will be short.

He is difficult to say no to.

Donnie would have been in the corner, cowering like a little bitch.

It’s too early to tell if the victim deserved it, so let’s stop the speculation right now, guys.

If you came here looking for police porn, I have some bad news.

He makes Teddy look like Zac Efron.

I wonder if she’s Super-sized?

He’s risking a critical drubbing with a title like that.

Matt LeBlanc!?

He better write the script of his life – or he might lose it!

Or ‘Meek’s Cutoff’. He liked ‘Green Lantern’ though.

Besides the slurping sounds…

With Steve Little, Ben Schwartz, and song and dance man Josh Groban.

If this porn biopic didn’t feature Seryfried’s breasts, it would probably be time to riot.

‘The Human Centipede’ series heads in a fresh new direction.

If you eat his mustache trimmings, I’m assuming you become him?

Try to flex on him? Don’t be silly.

Yelp user Jason O. might now be eligible to join the Writers Guild.

How will Thor lose his powers this time?

Now that this has been resolved, a nation can exhale and turn its focus to the presidential election.

Yup. We’re currently passing off commercials as entertainment. That’s how slow January is until Sundance rolls around.

It’s toe-tappin’.

The only downside is that if your pregnant wife gives birth those days, you’ll have a very unpleasant decision to make.

This won’t ruin your childhood as badly as the prequels did.

This is great news to both the handful of people who actually watched the show and the millions of others who inexplicably mourned its cancellation.

Shame on you, People’s Choice Awards, for disinviting Brand. SHAME ON YOUR EYES!

The Oscars want to demonstrate they’re more the same than ever with this parody piece.

Why are Mommy and Daddy fighting?

He Hearts Huckabees…And His Tranny Niece’s New Breasts

Oh man, I bet these bosses are gonna be sooooooo bad! Let’s go get drunk, guys!