News - Page 197

First Image from ‘Cowboys & Aliens’ Lacks Aliens
Wednesday, May 19 by

Jon Favreau tweeted this little morsel from the set of Cowboys & Aliens to get your appetite so whet your superiors are wondering why the mop handle in your grip is covered in drool. Though can we really be sure this is official just because the director of the movie released it?My overbearing paronia insists that the pic could be a clever marketing campaign by Disney for Toy Story 3. If Woody was flesh and blood THIS is how he would look, always hauling a backlight around with him so we could never be certain of his identity. Oh no, you're not pulling the wool over my eyes, Lasseter. First the subliminal Nazi propaganda shorts before the main attraction and now this? If you weren't so damn awesome at what you do I'd have a good mind to shake an angry fist at your visage. That and my angry fist is buried deep in a tub of animal crackers at the moment. I know there's an elephant in here somewhere…  

Isla Fisher May Head South For Wayne McClammy’s ‘Desperados’
Wednesday, May 19 by

Being a huge feminist and all (see above picture) I found it hard to enjoy The Hangover. The whole time I was all like, 'Where my sisters at??!" Well friends, my prayers have been answered. Household name Wayne McClammy ("The Sarah Silverman Program," Kimmel's "I'm F**king Matt Damon/Ben Affleck") is in talks to direct Desperados. The project is described as a lady-version of The Hangover, with Isla Fisher in talks to star. I'd think if you wanted a hungover redhead, you wouldn't need to look further than Lindsay Lohan **scribbles down joke, mails to Craig Kilborn**THR's got more info. You go, girlfriend:The story is about a woman who sends an indignant email to her new beau, who has gone silent after they have sex, only to discover he's comatose in a Mexican hospital. Panicking, she races south of the border with her friends in tow to intercept the email before he recovers.Dumb. You can't outrun an email. Just like you can't outrun sunlight or a flash freeze. I'm looking at you two, Blade and Jake Gyllenhaal.

Jemaine Clement Joins ‘Men in Black III’
Wednesday, May 19 by

Jemaine Clement of "Flight of the Concords" fame is slated to play the villain in Men in Black III. Clement joins Will Smith, Tommy Lee Jones, Josh Brolin and director Barry Sonnenfeld, who have all signed on to the project.While details are scarce, Collider is reporting that Clement will play an evil character named Yaz. Based on Clement's sideburns, one can only assume that "Yaz" is none other than Boston Red Sox's great Carl Yastrzemski, aka Mutton-chop Yaz.On the plus side, it would be hard to make a film any worse than MIB II. Unfortunately, Clement was already involved in the sci-fi related catastrophe, Gentleman Broncos, so anything is possible.

‘Ghostbusters Live’: Coming to a Library Near You
Wednesday, May 19 by

Finally, something tangible to report about Ghostbusters that doesn't involve Bill Murray's menstrual cycle. Rather than waiting around for Ghostbusters 3 like the rest of us saps, the fine folks at Improv Everywhere decided to take matters into their own hands by producing a version of Ghostbusters Live. The funnymen who had originally made a splash with their Best Buy sales prank which featured over eighty participants, pulled off quite the stunt with only seven able bodied comedians recently at the main branch of the New York Public Library and every spook filled second has been caught on camera for your enjoyment! I never thought that performance art could be so relevant. It's really inspired me to get my own flash mob version of Downfall off the ground. And if those people at the ADL don't like it they can go to hell. They never understood my art. (DreadCentral) See Ghostbusters Live after the jump.

Movie Archery Montage
Tuesday, May 18 by

Our friends at EgoTV put together this mashup of famous archery scenes from movies set to Def Leppard's "Pour Some Sugar On Me." I personally would have chosen Pat Benatar's "Hit Me With Your Best Shot," but then again I'm a hack. These links are a bullz-eye! **rimshot. fart.** 'Pirates 4' to Be Shot in 3D (Moviefone) Meet the Beer Experts (Asylum) Conan O'Brien Lists His Five Favorite YouTube Videos (PopEater) How Delonte West Hooked Up With Lebron's Mom (HolyTaco) First Script Scene of Facebook movie 'The Social Network' (BroBible) Getting Old Sucks (FilmDrunk) 10 Best SNL Digital Shorts (Unreality) Miss Massachusetts Pics (TotalProSports) Pretty Girls and Their Playthings (Maxim) Meet Jan Finney, Cris Cyborg's Next Victim (CagePotato) Joe Jonas Lied About Serving In Vietnam (CelebJihad) 10 Best Kids' Drawings Ever (Smosh) 5 Most Popular Celebs You've Never Heard Of (Pajiba) M'larky Trailer (Atom) 13 Facts about Weed (MadeMan) Tony Stewart Jumps from a Plane (AllLeftTurns)

Eddie Murphy Might Make A Funny ‘Nutty Professor’ Movie
Tuesday, May 18 by

Oprah?Looks like Eddie Murphy may take a break from the moody, little character pieces he's so well known for to don the fat suit and drink from the drawn butter well once again. While at the premiere of Shrek 4, Murphy told Access Hollywood:“You know what, there might be another Nutty Professor. We kind of wrote something that might be kind of funny. If the studios want to do it, we’ll do it. If you don’t see it, the studio was like, ‘This isn’t funny.’”I don't know Eddie. Precious wasn't all that funny and they let you do that. It even earned you an Oscar nomination. Don't be so hard on yourself, champ. Good things happen to good people. **gets killed anally by exploding office chair**

SNL Movie Spinoff Success
Tuesday, May 18 by

With the Will Forte vehicle MacGruber due out in theaters this Friday, I decided to look into the funny little history of "Saturday Night Live's" adventures on the silver screen. Generally the movies were spun off from their more popular sketches (how the Roxbury guys were popular, I'll never know).I wanted to grade SNL spinoffs that were regular sketches with regular cast members. I also wanted to compare the merits of each using the two only barometers for success that Hollywood has: critical reception and, of course, money. Further, I studied a particular SNL cast member, and their career success as compared to their SNL movie vehicle.Here are the results.  

We Lust After David Fincher’s ‘Se7en’ on Blu Ray DVD
Tuesday, May 18 by

'The world is a fine place and worth fighting for.' And it looks awesome in Blu Ray!David Fincher's Se7en is getting the Blu Ray treatment, meaning you'll soon see the bloated corpse of the fatass who ate himself to death in high definition, as God the father intended.The disk will be loaded with extras, including audio commentaries, alternate endings and full motion video details of "John Doe´s" creepy notebook writings. No word yet on the case, but hopefully it will resemble the box with the severed head. I think that'd be neat!Se7en on Blu Ray hits stores September 14th. (DreadCentral)

‘Toy Story 3′: Ned Beatty’s Most Powerful Role Since ‘Deliverance’
Tuesday, May 18 by

In this exclusive, behind the scenes look at Toy Story 3, Ned Beatty and Michael Keaton join an ensemble cast for the most powerful chapter to date in the beloved franchise. When Andy heads off to college, adventure fanatic Buzz Lightyear (Tim Allen) takes his toy friends on a river-rafting trip into the dangerous American back-country. During a chance encounter with a group of locals, an offhand comment about moonshine by Lots-o'-Huggin' Bear (Beatty) leads to a violent sexual assault. The trip soon descends into a nightmare in which both nature and mankind conspire against the toys, putting their lives and perhaps even their souls at risk. (LatinoReview) Watch Ned Beatty's powerful performance in Toy Story 3 after the jump.

Shia LaBeouf Craps on ‘Indiana Jones 4′, Spielberg, Self
Monday, May 17 by

The Shia LaBeouf blame train is once again leaving the station. But this time, instead of badmouthing the work of a universally reviled Michael Bay film, he's going after the work of of one of the greatest living directors, Steven Spielberg. In a recent interview with the Los Angeles Times, LeBeouf said he was disappointed with Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull, admitting his own performance was sub par, but also calling out the work of the famed director. I would never disrespect the man. I think he's a genius, and he's given me my whole life. He's done so much great work that there's no need for him to feel vulnerable about one film. But when you drop the ball you drop the ball." I fully agree that Spielberg dropped the ball, mainly by casting LaBeouf in the film. But I do like LaBeouf's habit of waiting until well after the fact to badmouth his own work. Along those lines, I'd like to apologize for my poorly written feature on the history of G.I. Joe war atrocities. While I do take some responsibility, I'd also like to say that Patrick Schumacker, the former editor of Screen Junkies, dropped the ball. (CinemaBlend)

Zoe Saldana Loads a Round for ‘Colombiana’
Monday, May 17 by

Zoe doing her best assassin pose. If this is what death looks like, I welcome it. Zoe Saldana is in talks to star in Colombiana, to be produced by Luc Besson of Taken producing fame. THR has the scoop:Written by Besson and Robert Mark Kamen, "Colombiana" is set in Latin America and the U.S. Saldana would play a young woman who, after witnessing her parents' murder as a child in Bogota, grows up to be a stone-cold assassin. She works for her uncle as a hitman by day, but her personal time is spent engaging in vigilante murders that she hopes will lead her to her ultimate target: the mobster responsible for her parents' death. So…it's another revenge flick. Or it's Batman without all the philanthropy. I was a big fan of Taken so I'll give Besson and Kamen the benefit of the doubt. I enjoyed watching Liam Nesson crack skulls for 90 minutes, what's to say I won't like Zoe Saldana doing the same thing in a tight pleather body suit? Note to director: take my note.

Bruce Willis Is Joseph Gordon-Levitt’s Future In ‘Looper’
Monday, May 17 by

Bruce Willis is going back in time for Rian Johnson's Looper and buyers are reported to be pouncing on it. In the sci-fi film, he'll play an older version of Joseph Gordon-Levitt, who may be targeted for assassination. Though the two actors don't look that much alike, who's to say what Gordon-Levitt would look like after the on-set of male pattern baldness and years of having to be civil to Ashton Kutcher.The premise of the movie has hit men sending their targets back in time, where they are killed. Thus no evidence is left behind. Because everyone knows that bending the fabric of space and time is easier than wearing gloves. (Deadline)

Cannes: The Adventure
Monday, May 17 by

That's me between the Asian and the freak. I had the opportunity to attend the Cannes Film Festival over the past few days, and it was a whirlwind experience full of red carpets, yacht parties, and Jean Claude Van Dammes galore. My brains are still recovering from the extensive travel and time difference, but I feel it’s more authentic and enjoyable if I share my journey in my current semi-conscious condition. When I arrived at the hotel, the Maison de Jacque D’Azur, I was greeted with an ice cold Stella Artois, a welcomed welcome after spending the previous fifteen hours on a metal tube that has no business hovering so long in the sky.  The Maison used to be home to Picasso, who I’m sure is rolling over in his grave now that bloggers are slogging around it, covering the interior with a thick layer of Cheetos dust.  

‘Napoleon Dynamite’ Gets Animated…for Some Reason
Monday, May 17 by

When it comes to flops, you can't get much bigger than Gentlemen Broncos. And like a wounded solider crying out for his mother, filmmakers Jared and Jerusha Hess are longing to return to familiar territory after their critical and financial depantsing. The pair is currently in talks with Fox to develop a pilot based their first, and some would say only success: Napoleon Dynamite. Sources close to the story state that many of the actors from the film will return to lend their voices to the cartoon, including star Jon Heder, Efran Ramirez (Pedro), Aaron Ruell (Kip), and Jon Gries (Uncle Rico). No word on whether or not Tina Majorino will return as Deb. No story details have been revealed, but it seems likely that it would work mainly as a continuation of the film, which followed Napoleon through the hilarious awfulness of his day-to-day existence.  I could make a joke about the fact that all of the original actors are "available" to do the voices, but hey, we can't all be successful "overnight writers" for screenjunkies.com. Besides, if you ask me, it sounds like a great plan. When Kevin Smith's career hit a rough patch, he developed an animated version of his first sucess, Clerks. He then went on to direct Jersey Girl. (Cinematical)

David Fincher to Direct Jules Verne’s ‘Fight Sub’
Sunday, May 16 by

The first rule of Fight Sub: you don't let McG direct Fight Sub.Director David Fincher is in talks with Disney to direct a remake of Jules Verne’s classic submarine adventure, 20,000 Leagues Under The Sea. Fincher is attempting to resurrect the project first helmed by McG, the famed auteur behind Charlie's Angels: Full Throttle and Korn: Who Then Now?Disney reportedly dropped McG from the project because they believed his take on the film was too dark. If you're looking for more light-hearted fare, Fincher is the obvious choice. I'm sure the scene where Captain Nemo finds his wife's severed head in a box will be a real knee slapper. (EmpireOnLine)

Photobomb Friday: ‘From Here to Eternity’ + Beached Whale
Friday, May 14 by

Get a room, you two.Here are your weekend linksHugh Hefner and Joan Rivers Vs. Best Worst Movie (Moviefone)Masterclash Takes On Bad TV (Asylum)Oprah to Tom Cruise: Sit Your Ass Down (Popeater)25 Sad Cleveland Fans (Holy Taco)Hard Ticket To Hawaii Keeps On Giving (Film Drunk)Cleveland Serenades LeBron (Total Pro Sports)Maxim's Hottest Hand Bras (Maxim)Dan Quinn Gives Advice to Jesse James (Cage Potato)Jessica Alba Shows Butt Crack, Enjoys Anal (CelebJihad)Iron Man Vs. Kool-Aid Man (Smosh)Robin Hood Is Not A Very Fun Movie (Pajiba)A Montage of Manliness (Atom)Live In the Original Playboy Mansion (MadeMan)Victory Lane Girls (All Left Turns)

Lake Bell Is A Friend With Benefits
Friday, May 14 by

We've held off reporting about Friends With Benefits up until now because the thought of Ashton Kutcher in a no-strings-attached sexual relationship with Natalie Portman makes our parts wither. Sadly, we've been put into a position where we would be remiss if we continued the embargo.Ivan Reitman has begun to wisely throw hottie after hottie at the project, and today there's news that the ridiculously sexy Lake Bell has joined the cast as Kutcher's co-worker. Olivia Thirlby and Greta Gerwig have also recently become attached. Great. Ashton Kutcher surrounded by hot women. Is this a movie-version of those camera commercials he's been doing? (Variety)

‘Solitary Man’ Actress Mary Louise Parker
Friday, May 14 by

After moving to NY to pursue acting, Mary Louise Parker got a job measuring feet at a shoe store. It was all downhill from there. She starred in a movie about old women named Fried Green Tomatoes, and movie about middle-aged women named Boys on the Side, and a show about selling ganja named "Weeds." She won an Emmy for the latter, but it ain't no feet measurin', that's for sure. A word from Mary Louise: "Oh, I just hate having to polish all of these awards!"Tell me about. My capoeta trophies are so tarnished it's an embarrassment when I'm entertaining company. More pics of the weed-selling MILF after the jump.

Charlie Kaufman Punched Up ‘Kung Fu Panda’ Sequel
Friday, May 14 by

"F*ck it."Residents of the Williamsburg section of Brooklyn should be prepared to see Kung Fu Panda: The Kaboom of Doom popping up on their Netflix Local Favorites. It's been revealed that Charlie Kaufman was brought in to fix up the animated flick's script. That's right. The man who wrote Adaptation also took a gig on a movie about a kung fu kicking panda. If you listen closely, you can hear Robert McKee laughing his nuts off.It's not uncommon for several writers to pitch in on a studio film and remain uncredited. Especially an animated one. Kaufman is reported to have only polished the material, so it's doubtful we'll notice his handiwork. But keep an eye out for uncharacteristically cerebal fart jokes when the movie opens in June of 2011. (THR)

Sam Worthington Ain’t Your Grandpa’s ‘Quatermain’
Friday, May 14 by

Sam Worthington will add "wearing a hat" to his growing repertoire. In addition to roles in Dan Dare: Pilot Of the Future, Dracula Year Zero, and The Fields, he is now attached to star as literary adventurer and Indiana Jones inspiration, Allan Quatermain. But don't worry. Dreamworks can sense you yawning at that news and that's why the classic hero will be given a sci-fi makeover. For the new non-stuffy Quatermain, Worthington will return from space to an abandoned Earth for an epic treasure hunt.When reached for fictional comment, star and producer Sam Worthington had this to say, "I'd like to really master the hat-wearing aspect of this character. This will require loads of practice. I'll wear all types of hats to acclimate my scalp to the process. I'm actually beginning training with a hat-wearing coach next week. This guy that Jim [Cameron] recommended. Seems like a good bloke." (THR)

‘Rambo V’ – Who Needs Stallone
Thursday, May 13 by

Kids today just can't get enough of John Rambo. Check the Internet, and you'll find there are literally millions, if not billions of Rambo related Facebook pages and Twitter accounts. And with Rambo mania (or as I like to call it, "Romania") at an all time high, it's no surprise that a group of investors is trying to drum up money to make the fifth installment of the franchise. In order to raise awareness for their cause, said investors have been putting up Rambo V posters at various locations around Cannes. The only problem is that Sylvester Stallone says he's through with the character. Stallone says the people behind these posters are out there looking for funding, and told him that if he won’t do it, someone else will. He's adamant that he won't do it so that means Rambo V, if they find funding, will happen with someone new playing Rambo. Screw Stallone. Those investors shouldn't let something like the loss of an iconic lead actor keep them from giving the public what it so desperately wants. Get The Rock on the phone. We want more Rambo! (CinemaBlend)

Handheld ‘American History X’ Game Will Smash Your Mind
Thursday, May 13 by

Sweetest. Hanukkah. Gift. Ever.(via YTMND)Amanda Seyfried Has Some Questions to Answer (Moviefone)Jesse Jayne Has Some Questions to Answer (Asylum)Shia Disses Papa Bear, Michael Bay (PopEater)5 Ways to Clean Up An Oil Spill (HolyTaco)G.I. Joe 2 Has a Script? (FilmDrunk)Suck It, Terrence Howard! (UnReality)Pedobear May Be the Predators New Mascot (Total Pro Sports)Real Life MacGrubers (Maxim)Xande Ribeiro Eyeing Contract With UFC (Cage Potato)Is Miley Cyrus Whoring Her Way to the Top? (CelebJihad)World's Most Badass Illustrator Ever: R.I.P. (Smosh)Where's This Generation's Freddy Krueger? (Pajiba)Last 10 Seconds of Lost Challenge (Atom)How To Booby Trap Your Apartment (MadeMan)World's Tiniest Redneck (AllLeftTurns)

Samuel L. Jackson Says Nick Fury To Star in ‘S.H.I.E.L.D.’ Movie
Thursday, May 13 by

This billboard never gets old.This past week, Samuel L. Jackson appeared on Radio Big Boy to promote Iron Man 2 in between bicycle horns and other wacky sound effects. He got to talking about his nine picture deal with Marvel and let slip the news that he will star in his own Nick Fury, Agent of S.H.I.E.L.D. movie. To me, it seems like he was just talking though.Jackson was pretty vague about when shooting would begin on the supposed film (sometime after The Avengers) and didn't seem to know much about the current slate of Marvel films. He didn't know who was playing Captain America, and mixed up Thor star Chris Hemsworth for Chris Pine. Though in all fairness, we handsome, strapping white guys do look a lot alike (we're always joking about that at our meetings). Still, I long for a day when I can live like Samuel L. Jackson, oblivious to movie news and the comings and goings of the Internet. Just once I'd like to feel the soft kiss of the summer sun. **squeaks finger slowly down window glass, sighs, resigns self to watching Hurley from Lost's "Dude" video** (Cinema Blend)

You Want to Send Me to Cannes? Uhhhh…Okay!
Thursday, May 13 by

That's right, boys! Soak it up!So I'm on a plane right now flying to Cannes for the the tiny, little film festival they do annually, and I'm having trouble remembering who I slept with/killed to get this opportunity. Also, my 767 jet must be equipped with magic because I'm posting on the site from 1000s of feet up in the air. Eat your heart out, George Jetson. Your future looks like a silly b*tch now.Come to think of it, no one in their right or wrong mind would request sexual favors from me in exchange for a trip to Cannes. That's right, Stella Artois so kindly sponsored this excursion for me. I plan on living it up on the French Riviera like Jacques D'azur, and attempting to hit on as many women as he has bedded with a simple come hither glance. Don't post this on my girlfriend's Facebook wall. She doesn't read the site.I'll be bringing you all kinds of fun audio and/or visual presentations documenting my escapades at the film festival. I even had to rent a tuxedo. With a bowtie. Why do I have a strange feeling I'll be working this trip off by serving tray passed mini quiches at an after party?I'm not certain yet what screenings I'll be attending or what galas I'll be drunkenly stumbling into, but rest assured you will know when I know. I mainly just plan on donning my tux 24/7 and unsuccessfully trying to convince people I'm Daniel Craig. Not James Bond, mind you. Daniel Craig. Now to secure some piercing blue eyes…My battery is running out because I lack discipline and don't refresh it like Apple suggests you do at least once a month, so I'll say au revoir for now. Keep on checking back for my updates and the use of French words that I pick up at high-stakes poker games and mustache-twisting pow-wows. Kisses, my babies!

‘Multiple Sarcasms’ Actress Mira Sorvino
Thursday, May 13 by

Mira Sorvino is every Italian dude's fantasy: a tall, tough, hot, Italian broad whose dad played Paulie in Goodfellas. She also won a Best Supporting Actress Oscar for her role as a foul-mouthed prostitute in the Woody Allen flick Mighty Aphrodite. So in summary, she's a tall, tough, hot, Italian foul-mouthed prostitute. Check, please!A word from Mira: "There's a side of my personality that goes completely against the East Coast educated person and wants to be a pin-up girl in garages across America."But then you remember how degrading that is, right? I've heard it 1000 times from you brainy girls. It always ends in me putting the lens cap back on my camera. More of Mira's beauty and less of her brains after the jump.

CANNES FILM FESTIVAL
Thursday, May 13 by

Stay up to date on my escapades at the Cannes Film Festival.

Adam Sandler and Happy Madison Take Interest In Ruining ‘Pixels’
Thursday, May 13 by

Pixels! – Watch more Game TrailersPixels has almost successfully unlocked every achievement required to become a viral sensation. Level One: it was emailed to you by your friends. Level Two: blogs reposted. Level Three: it was emailed to you by everyone in your office. And now, it has achieved Level Four status: being ruined by Adam Sandler. Expect it to achieve Level Five (being emailed to you by your mom) status in about four months.Back to Sandler. Happy Madison is in early talks to adapt Patrick Jean's video-game themed invasion short into a feature length film, though there's no indicaton how they plan to stretch the content that far. I can already picture Rob Schneider as a racially-insensitve depiction of Super Mario, and Sandler as the hapless dad tasked with imprisoning the escaped characters in the magic Atari console he purchased from Henry Winkler.Though I don't feel that Happy Madison is the best fit for this material, as a New Yorker, I encourage these 8-bit invaders to bring it on. If we start to live in fear, the Pac-Men have already won. (Deadline)

11 Terribly Awesome Movies
Thursday, May 13 by

We all have them: Our favorite worst movies. Whether due to poor acting, writing, production value or all of the above, there are some gorgeously entertaining cinematic turds that we just can’t flush out of our hearts. Here are 11 of the most awfulsome movies ever made. 11. Double Team

Nick Swardson and Michael Pena Join ’30 Minutes Or Less’
Thursday, May 13 by

People grieve in different ways.Michael Pena and fart detective Nick Swardson are in talks to join Danny McBride and Aziz Ansari in 30 Minutes or Less. Swardson will play the best friend to McBride's rigged-to-explode pizza guy cum (titter (hee hee!)) bank robber. Pena, who we'll see opposite McBride in season two of Eastbound and Down, is in talks to play a tattooed assassin. It's a good thing that the roles aren't reversed. I can't imagine Swardson as a tattooed assassin. Mostly because I can't take an assassin with a tramp stamp seriously. I don't know. He just seems like the type. (THR)

Francis Ford Coppola Rules Out ‘Godfather 3D’
Thursday, May 13 by

For all of you Francis Ford Coppola fans who are anxiously awaiting The Godfather 3D, I'm sorry to tell you it ain't gonna happen. In an interview with ElectronicHouse, the legendary director came out swinging against the craze, saying that most films aren't enhanced by 3D, except at the box office. “I feel that until you can watch 3D without glasses, it’s the same thing we know,” he says. “I personally do not want to watch a movie with glasses. It’s tiresome.” Coppola says he even removed his 3D glasses to watch portions of “Avatar,” even though it meant he was watching out of focus. Who does this guy think he is? I recently watched Clash of the Titans in 3D, and let me tell you that it was a thousand times better than The Godfather I & II combined! If Coppola has any hope of his films being accepted by future generations, he'll convert his entire catalog to 3D at once. That way we can watch Jack in the third dimension, as it was meant to be experienced. (CinemaBlend)