Steven Seagal has built a career laying his hands on other people. Recently this has brought controversy his way. What the man needs now is a comeback. Here are six projects that could easily put him back on top. Law and Order: SVU (Seagal Victims Unit)
Just the other day on Things I Never Say Day, I was saying how badly we need a sequel to The Ring. Preferably one that is 3D and focuses on a more teen-centric angle. Well, save up your shillings for an inflated ticket price because it looks like Paramount is intending to do just that. Dream House writer David Loucka on script duties. No details yet about how the girl in the old VHS will return but one scenario has teens finding a VCR that still works. Really?Okay. Honestly, you kids today with your Jason Beavers and sexting parties. VCR's aren't that old or difficult to find. Either this film takes place in 2025 or Afghanistan. (THR)
Think you can pull the wool over MY eyes, Pixar?! I knew this video for a supposed Lots-o'-Huggin' Bear was a Toy Story 3 ploy the second I hit play. Sure, it looks authentic, but if this bear really existed I would have owned the crap out of it back in 1983. It doesn't even matter that a bear with the word "hug" in its name doesn't even give hugs but instead just receives them (like a normal stuffed animal?), or that the grindhouse-esque commercial cuts off right before the bear slaughters the little girl in her sleep and then goes for the rest of the family. I simply had to have everything I saw advertised, or mother got the hose again. Check out the surprisingly well-done video after the jump. It must have taken the Pixar geniuses months to render the fuzzy tracking at the bottom of the frame.
"Doggarnit. People like me."It appears that Nicolas Cage's crappy sequel plate is full. It looks like the cash-strapped actor may be forced to choose between roles. From Vulture:Insiders confirm to Vulture that Columbia is facing a ticking clock on the rights to the BBQ-skulled Marvel Comics character: Legally, if the studio isn't in production on a sequel by November 14, 2010, the franchise automatically reverts to Marvel — which means the comic company's new owner, Disney. Insiders tell us that Columbia is asking Marvel for an extension. (Asking, pleading, it's a fine line.) But time is running out. Cage has spoken about his desire to make a second Ghost Rider; the issue is whether his schedule will be free before the deadline. Disney is also hoping to get him for a third National Treasure with Jerry Bruckheimer, which could be shooting as early as this fall and would presumably earn the star a hefty paycheck. And considering Cage's well-documented money troubles, that cash may trump his deep love of comic books.A Ghost Rider without Nicolas Cage wouldn't feel like a Ghost Rider film at all. That would be like The Punisher without Thomas Jane, or The Hulk without Eric Bana, or Iron Man without Terrence Howard. I can't even imagine a world where such travesties would be allowed.
In case you can't wait for the Jonah Hex trailer dropping later this week, SyFy has 11 seconds of footage for your impatient ass. The movie has had so many different writers, directors, reshoots, and delays I can only imagine that the final product will be somewhere between tolerable and intolerable. Wait what, it features Megan Fox in a corset and gattling guns strapped to an aggravated stallion? Take my money, box office cashier! (Movieline)Check out the footage after the jump…
"Seriously, any spare change you have. Just trying to get a bite to eat."Warner Bros. and DC Comics are developing a traveling show for the kids tentatively titled, "Batman Live." Alan Burnett, who is a veteran of "Batman: The Animated Series," will write the script which will include numerous villians, though no plot specifics have been unveiled beyond the usual "millionaire beats up the mentally-ill" framework. It's said the show may premiere in 2011 or wait to capitalize on the buzz of Christopher Nolan's third Batman film in 2012.Personally, I'm happy to see Batman "pulling a Conan" and taking his show on the road. I never approved of the way Six Flags Great Adventure replaced him with the Penguin to host The Batman Stunt Show. I'm with Batman. (THR)
Last summer's The Final Destination was intended to be the last film in the franchise until someone realized they forgot to include laser-eye surgery. And thus, The Final Destination 5 in 3D will breeze into theaters next year, knock over some paint thinner and cause a huge fire in the process.Eric Heisserer (Elm Street remake, The Thing prequel) has been hired to write the script. Plot specifics are not known at this time but it is said that New Line is looking to break out of the repetition of the previous entries. I'll keep you posted when the entirely new, totally retarded plot contrivances are announced. (THR)
Break open a celebratory tin of cat food! A source at Weta has told MarketSaw that a sequel to District 9 is in pre-production and will go before cameras this October. Peter Jackson will once again produce with Neill Blomkamp back in the director's chair. There's no word yet about the plot or the title of the sequel. Though my well-placed sources (who wish to remain anonymous) tell me they may involve an Electric Boogaloo.
Look, I'm in a box. The fourth and final trailer for M. Night Shyamalan's The Last Airbender has rained down all over our faces and minds and Hush Puppies. It's quite a bit more impressive than previous trailers and that mostly has to do with the addition of dragons. Like every other movie being released in the near future, The Last Airbender is being converted to 3D so that you can enjoy all the earth, wind, and fire right up in your face. I hope they play "September" by those guys on the soundtrack. That song is always fun to stumble around to when you're drunk at a wedding. Check out the trailer after the jump. The Last Airbender blows into theaters July 2.
If Venkman's artistic expressions weren't suppressed. Here are your weekend links.Tasty Black Widow 'Iron Man 2' Clip (Moviefone) Porn Stars Get Asked Where Babies Come From (Asylum)Bret Michaels in Critical Condition (PopEater)25 Drunk Babies (HolyTaco)Vaness Hudgens as Spider-Girl? (FilmDrunk)Drew Brees Is The Madden 2010 Cover Boy (TotalProSports)The Evolution of Raquel Welch (Unreality)A Fantastic Gallery of Booty (Maxim)Dana White's Latest WEC (CagePotato)Vanessa Hudgens Takes Candid Pics (CelebJihad)35 Things Hulk Fans Need (Smosh)The Pussification of Children's Movies (Pajiba)A Restaurant with Dancing?! (Atom)Aaron's 499 Odds (AllLeftTurns)
A few weeks ago we reported to you that Jacques d'Azur, the King of Cannes, went missing. Mr. d'Azur is now presumed dead, or lost forever on an island inhabited entirely by beautiful women, and the search is on to find his heir. This lucky person will fill in for Jacques at the 2010 Cannes Film Festival — an exclusive VIP trip of a lifetime worth of $10,000. You'll get the very same treatment that Jacques would have. That includes the premieres, the parties, the limos, the helicopter pads, and hobnobbing with A-List celebrities. This swanky trip is sponsored by Stella Artois 4%, so head on over to their site for complete details and to enter. You could be on a jet to the French Riviera before you know it. It's good to be the king. HURRY! CONTEST ENDS SUNDAY!
Paramount has won the rights to Sacha Baron Cohen's next comedy film after sending goats to the actor and his reps. That's right. Goats. They also gave him $20 million against 20% of the first-dollar gross. Which means he could stand to earn.. umm…. uh…. carry the one…consult with Clippy…. uh…. a lot of money. So that helped to seal the deal too.The film will star Cohen in a dual role, playing two characters we've yet to see. One is a goat herder and the other a deposed dictator who gets stuck in America. But back to the goats. Deadline reports, "visitors to WME were greeted by a goat wandering across the 3rd floor atrium — that is, until Ari Emanuel had the goat removed after it took a dump in the hallway."No fair. Brett Ratner dumps in that hallway all the time and he's still allowed to make deals.
Those who have always wished they could see Snake Plissken run around with the burnt-out facades of ruined Starbucks locations behind him have cause to celebrate. It's been announced that Breck Eisner is in talks to pull the let's-get-out-of-this-joint action-thriller Escape from New York, out of development hell.Breck Eisner, who directed Overtures' remake of "The Crazies," is in negotiations to helm the remake of "Escape From New York" for New Line.The remake has been a top priority for the company, which picked up the rights in March 2007, with Gerard Butler attached to star and Ken Nolan writing the script. The project then veered into development hell, losing Butler but amassing a penal colony of writers, among them Jonathan Mostow and Allan Loeb, and collecting then losing director Len Wiseman.Eisner's boarding should bring "Escape" back on track as New Line, sticking with the Loeb draft, tries to mix an origin story for anti-hero Snake Plissken and merge it with the story of the 1981 original. No word yet on when the Rock will resign himself to star with a brooding sigh. "Yeah, sure. Pass me that eye-patch." But expect that news soon. (THR)
First Iron Man punched Hugh Grant in the face, then danced dirty with Patrick Swayze, and now he's getting all artsy fartsy with Leonardo DiCaprio. The suits over at Paramount must be ecstatic that these mashups are making the rounds. Not that the release of Iron Man 2 needs much more hype, but it's an exec's wet dream to get a superhero franchise and James Cameron together by any means possible.
With the recent Hollywood push to produce and convert everything they possibly can into 3D, you gotta wonder if the major congloms are gonna work with their music departments to throw out a few more 3D gigs. To date, there have only been three such concert shows in theaters, with Hannah Montana being the only big success. Country singer Kenny Chesney releases his show to the masses this Friday, so we'll see how a cowboy fares. Fact is, “The Studio Man” has apparently forgotten that their largest and most loyal audience members are young adult males. Why can’t we score a show or two from a band that actually rocks hard (sorry U2 fans, they just don’t)? The following are eight bands/performers that, if given their own 3D theatrical film, would inspire some airborne devil-horns and bring in bank at the box office. Muse
Who is this giant, fossilized guy?Despite having had its soup pissed in time and time again, Ridley Scott has agreed to return to the Alien franchise. He gave some details about the "fresh" ideas we can expect to see in his prequel.“It’s set in 2085, about 30 years before Sigourney [Weaver's character Ellen Ripley]. It’s fundamentally about going out to find out ‘Who the hell was that Space Jockey?’ The guy who was sitting in the chair in the alien vehicle — there was a giant fellow sitting in a seat on what looked to be either a piece of technology or an astronomer’s chair. … We're hoping to have it in theaters in late 2011, or maybe the best date in 2012." Sounds as if they're taking a cue from The Thing prequel, and reverse-engineering a movie out of the crime scene found early in the first. Scott himself is aware of how badly the franchise sucks nowadays, citing AvP as "a pity" and wondering aloud how many Alien films there have been. There have been six, Ridley. And two Gladiator films. (MTV)
PEW. PEW. PEW.It's been a long time since we've heard anything about the adaptation of World War Z. Max Brooks, the book's author, spoke with MTV and gave the update that we're about a month away from seeing a rewrite from Matthew Carnahan. After that point, it's up to Paramount to decide when and how awesomely it gets made.He also acknowledged that the style of the book is impossible to translate to film and commended the original script's ability to weave a cohesive narrative from the numerous, sprawling entries in the book. Until we hear more, readers are advised to prepare for the impending zombie uprising. A nice way to do so would be with this combination night table/zombie-proof bat and shield. Also effective against cat burglars.
What does it take for Hollywood to start giving back? About $2.7 billion. By the time Avatar arrived on DVD and Blu Ray, 20th Century Fox took a special Earth Day initiative. James Cameron himself got his hands dirty to help plant a real tree. This tree won’t have any psychic powers, but it has some real significance to Avatar’s environmental message:Cameron, actress CCH Pounder and Fox Executives planted the first of 1,000,000 trees that will be planted in 15 different countries throughout the year. If you like, you can visit the James Cameron tree on the 20th Century Fox backlot. Just tell security I said it was aight.More story and pics after the jump…
Pure Ridley Scott is on display in this new clip from Robin Hood. Not that the action sequence of Robin and his merry men storming a French castle isn't exciting, but Ridley must stage these battles in his sleep now. He pulls a hot oil double-whammy here by having it poured from a vat by the enemy while at the same time hung in sacks on the castle gate by the heroes. Oil vs. oil?! Things are about to get slippery, yo!
You're powerless to resist the confidence.Legendary cocksman Jack Nicholson has been offered a role in LASt VEGAS, a comedy centering around a group of elderly cooz-hounds who reunite in Las Vegas. While there, two of the friends fall for the same woman. Nicholson's potential character is the playboy of the group who has yet to resign his bachelorhood. It's being described as Grumpy Old Men meets The Hangover. Some might say that's also the perfect way to describe Rip Torn. (Vulture)
All work and no snozzberries makes Willy Wonka a dull boy.
Seth Rogen and Chris Pine are being considered for the role vacated by Bradley Cooper in This Means War. Makes sense seeing as they're all pretty much the same guy. If you're squinting really hard.The romantic comedy tells the story of two best friends who compete for the affections of Reese Witherspoon and leave New York City decimated in their wake. Because if there's one thing that New York City is lacking in, it's women hotter than Reese Witherspoon. One the one hand, Chris Pine fits the heart-throb bill better than Rogen. Yet on the other, Rogen's packing the right equipment should director McG decide to include a topless scene. I could see this one going either way. (The Wrap)
Last we heard from Brad Fuller, he and Platinum Dunes were not sure what was going to happen with Friday the 13th 2: The Squeakquel. Yesterday on Twitter Fuller announced, "it is dead – not happening." No further explanation was provided as Fuller chose to not use his remaining 113 characters, but it can be assumed this stems from Platinum Dunes's desire to move away from the horror genre.Still, it comes as a surprise though considering the cash the remake raked in. And it's strange to think of a world without a never-ending string of Friday the 13th sequels. They've been a part of life as long as I can remember. Like my effeminate throwing ability and the constant taunting from my peers. (Bloody Disgusting)
Iron Man is Swayze's limber partner in Dirty Dancing, in case you've ever wanted to see him put in the corner instead of Baby.You'll have the time of your life with these links.Hollywood's Hardest-Working Actors (Moviefone)6 Hottest Girls of AccuWeather (Asylum)What's Hot at the Tribeca Film Festival (PopEater)25 Examples of Unintentional Porn (HolyTaco)Stupid 'Downfall' Studio Pulling Hitler Clips (FilmDrunk)8 of the Strangest Bars in the World (Unreality)Jared Allen's Night Out Gets Cray Cray (TotalProSports)21 Awesome Monkey Tattoos (Maxim)MMA Gif Party (CagePotato)Twlight Eclipse Exclusive Screen Shot (CelebJihad)25 People Molesting Statues (Smosh)The Other 130 Great Schwarzenegger Quotes (Pajiba)Musical Ode to Chatroulette (Atom)When and Where it's Legal to Kick Ass (MadeMan)Sasquatch Earnhardt Jr. (AllLeftTurns)
Photo taken in an alternate universe where James Cameron is a member of Tangerine Dream.It won't be long before Sam Worthington plugs his hair into a double-tailed dolphin in order to glide amongst the extra-finned fish and decempi of Pandora's oceans. James Cameron has announced that Avatar 2 will combine his love of the deep with his love of deep pockets."Part of my focus in the second film is in creating a different environment – a different setting within Pandora. And I'm going to be focusing on the ocean on Pandora, which will be equally rich and diverse and crazy and imaginative, but it just won't be a rain forest. I'm not saying we won't see what we've already seen; we'll see more of that as well."Man, Cameron loves him some bodies of water. Just look at his moistened resume: Titanic, The Abyss, Aliens of the Deep, Ghosts of the Abyss, Pirahna II, and that time he pushed Michael Biehn into a pool. (LA Times)
Barry Sonnenfeld confirming the news. Director Barry Sonnenfeld told Showbiz 411 that Men in Black 3D is closer to happening sometime at some point. Will Smith has officially signed on and Tommy Lee Jones nodded awhile back, thus confirming his involvement. There's only the small matter of a script, which didn't seem to hinder the production of MiB2. I'm pretty sure the shooting draft of that was scribbled on the back pages of a Wild Wild West script. Men in Black 3D will be in 3D, as the title suggests and your common sense surmised. It's most likely Sony's hope that it lands in theaters Memorial Day 2011. Will Smith has a history of making that weekend his box office bitch.
You most likely remember Danneel Harris as Kumar's eventual girlfriend in Harold and Kumar Escape Guantanamo Bay. She had the three-way with the bag of weed. Ahhhh there it is. I'll let you go and rewatch that scene now.A word from Danneel: "Going around half-naked stops being cute when you're 35."I'd gladly grant you an extension on that. Check out 31-year-old Danneel after the jump.
In news that will make out-of-work dolly grips ecstatic, Martin Lawrence is certain that Bad Boys 3 will definitely happen needlessly. A script has been in the works for awhile and Michael Bay and Will Smith have stated that they'd come back if their price (Smith wants a role for Jaden, Bay wants a lifetime supply of snow leopard meat) is met. Here's what Lawrence told MTV:Any time you can get Big Willie to come out and talk about doing a third installment of a hot movie like ‘Bad Boys,’ you have to take notice. I met with Michael Bay, and he said he’s onboard too — so it’s real…We’re just waiting on Jerry Bruckheimer to let us know when it’s really real.Sounds like sh*t could get real to me. As long as the story is there, of course.
Entertainment Weekly aired a featurette centering on Iron Man 2's villains Whiplash and Justin Hammer. It's nothing mind blowing, but for all those needing a fix it'll "take you there" and have you feeling the effects for about twenty minutes afterwords, not unlike the coke Mickey Rourke used to rail off hotel carpets. Also, the suit Sam Rockwell is wearing fits him really well. What, a man can't admire fine tailoring? **Rips off sleeveless polo. Gets into fighting stance** Check out the featurette below. Iron Man 2 hits theaters May 7. (/Film)
"I'm out this bitch."Leonard Nimoy won't be ordering additional prints of his headshot. The Star Trek star has decided to hang up his pointy ears and goatee that he wears when he plays a villian and retire from acting after sixty years.“I want to get off the stage. Also, I don’t think it would be fair to Zachary Quinto. He’s a terrific actor, he looks the part, and it’s time to give him some space. And I’m very flattered the character will continue. [Before all this] I was away from acting for 12 years, so I guess I was seducable. But since J.J. Abrams revived the Star Trek franchise, I felt I owed him something. And I’m glad I did it because he promised me a good story, and it was.”He's also retiring from the convention scene, with only a few more appearances planned. So if you have any important questions or theories about pon farr negation or want to point out continuity errors in the original series, your time to pester Mr. Nimoy is running out. (Toronto Sun)